Here's Ch. 11!
Feedback is GREATLY appreciated.
I think this is my longest chapter so far, so yeah...Hope you guys like it!
Hah, there's really not much else to say.
The song for this chapter is So Contagious – Acceptance
Many of you probably aren't familiar with it, and if you're not I strongly recommend it.
The reason I chose it was because of the whole mood of the lyrics throughout the song, and how lovely they fit into the feelings of Edward and Bella.
(--You can listen to this song by heading to my profile and clicking the link to my website!--)
BPOV
I felt safe. I had never ever heard those two words being said to me before. You're safe. With the sureness of his voice, and the comfort of his embrace, I felt safe. For the first time in my life, I knew that Charlie couldn't touch me. The pain in my shoulder was starting to seer, but I ignored it and tried to only focus on Edward's arms holding me close.
Edward was right. I didn't know how right he was until he actually said something out loud. I was scared, but all for different reasons. I was scared for fear of being separated from Edward permanently. I was scared that Charlie would just continue to get rougher and rougher along with the more amount of time I'd spend with Edward and the Cullen's. Most of all, I was scared of being hurt again. Edward's intentions always seemed good and pure, but what if he suddenly changed all of that? What if he suddenly discovered that I really wasn't as great as he always thought I was. Then I'd be completely all alone. I didn't know if I could bear that feeling again.
His arms continued to encircle me; His embrace around my body felt so safe. Edward was like my halo, his light and radiance absorbed into my skin, making me feel a sense of hope and security. That twinkle of hope was telling that the everyone would be alright, and for just a moment, I didn't doubt it. Being there with Edward, I realized something. I realized that for my whole life, I had been robotic and willing to everyone's requests of me. Charlie would hit me, I wouldn't comply. Victoria would bitch at me, I wouldn't speak. James would assault me, I wouldn't press charges. That's how it worked. That's how it had always worked.
Now, it felt like that all was changing. My will-power felt stronger than ever, and that confidence that had once filled me was there again. Every nerve in my body felt like a live wire. I pulled away from Edward with possibly the biggest smile that had ever came across my face. His face was bewildered and confused, and it was a really weird thing to notice at the time, but he had become impossibly more good-looking since the first time we met. It came out of nowhere when I suddenly leaned up on my tip toes and pecked a kiss on his surprised lips. The confusion that was there before vanished completely from his face, and was replaced with exhilaration.
He took my face firmly in his hands and planted light kisses all over my face. On the tip of my nose, on both cheeks, gently on my eyelids, and on my chin. He pulled back just inches to gouge my expression which was joy. I noticed his eyes zeroing in on the last place I knew he wanted to kiss. My lips. I parted them ever so slightly just before he lightly placed his own on them.
Looking at Edward and his personality, you'd never expect his lips to be so. . .soft. They were though, and I pouted my own lips into his while he took my bottom lip and gently sucked on it. I did the same with his top one. He placed one hand on my back to pull me closer to him, and the other lightly stroked my cheek. I brought both my arms up and wrapped them around his neck, tangling my fingers into his messy bronze hair.
This kiss was different than the one in the hallway this morning. It was more sweet, tender. When Edward and thrown his lips against mine in front of everyone, I knew he was doing it for me. That was obvious by his smirk towards Vicky when he pulled away. I didn't know what to think about it at first, but then I realized that I had liked it. A lot. Then, I was afraid that Vicky would eat me alive in English after just witnessing what she had, but Alice was there, and bless her little her. She stood up for me. I believe her exact words had been some along the lines of, "Back the hell off you skanky-ass bitch." Even I couldn't hold back my snickers from that one.
The way Edward was kissing me now though, I just didn't know. It was like I couldn't think straight. He had me wrapped up with all of my thoughts always about him. I was becoming obsessed, and was afraid that I wouldn't be able to stop when I needed to. I sighed happily and pulled away, satisfied enough that I thought it was an okay time to stop.
Edward smiled crookedly at me which caused me to forget whatever I was about to say to him the moment before. So I enjoyed it, and smiled right back at him. Once my thoughts finally came back to me, I swallowed nervously. "Edward, do you think I could come over after school?" I couldn't go home to Charlie. My new plan was to stay away from him as much as absolutely possible.
He stroked lightly right under my cheek bone, causing the blood to rush to my face. "That's not even a question, Bells. You don't even have to ask." His tone was obvious. I hadn't known I was so welcome there, so I had to ask. I grinned and glanced towards the parking lot that now only consisted of a few cars. He took my hand in his and lead me to the Volvo.
"Bella!" Alice cried as Edward and I stepped inside, throwing her arms around me. "I didn't know you were coming, Edward never told me! Oh, this'll be so fun, Rose and I can give you a makeover!" I stared at her in disbelief, but shook it off quickly and laughed nervously. The thought of a makeover made me cringe the slightest. I wasn't the Barbie doll type. Edward squeezed my hand lightly.
"Al, leave poor Bella alone," Emmett laughed as he came into view. He had half a cookie shoved in his mouth and was wearing a cooking apron. Why did I always seem so surprised when Emmett was cooking? I guess I had always thought of him as a tough-guy jock. You can't judge a book by its cover, I reminded myself.
"Bella doesn't mind," She scolded then turned to beam at me, "Do you, Bella?" I shook my head assuringly at her and smiled nervously as convincing as I could. Edward studied my expression, making sure I was okay. I gave him a tiny nod letting him know that I was.
"Well, Rose is waiting upstairs," Alice told me grabbing my hand and tugging me away from Edward. He laughed and held on tightly before releasing. Alice rolled her eyes at how pathetic the two of us were. She narrowed her eyes playfully at Edward. "You, no coming up or peaking until we're done. You'll have plenty of time to play with Bella afterwards, so go and find Jazz and entertain him – He's bored outta his mind." Edward smirked at his little sister and gave me one last nervous glance before walking out of the room.
I had no idea of what Rose and Alice's possible intentions for me were, but when the had me sit in a chair in front of a colossal mirror in their bathroom, filled with products galore, I shut my eyes and imagined what Edward was doing at that very moment.
I heard Alice instructing Rose on how my hair would go, and what places to curl it while Rose tugged and pulled at it, sticking in and taking things out. Alice soon began working on my face. She started spreading on various make-up and foundations, making my skin glamorous, as she had assured me. I never wore make-up, not unless I needed to for a Charlie cover-up, so I was nervous how this would all turn out.
The fear of what would happen when I got home never once left me, I just pushed it aside many times to the best of my ability. I decided that I should enjoy the good things while they lasted, and not dwell on the bad.
While Alice was applying product to my eyes, she asked curiously, "So, you really like my brother, don't you?" I had yet to open my eyes as instructed, but I almost slipped and peaked to see what her expression looked like. Her tone sounded smug.
"Yeah," I answered simply, not sounding to eager, "He's nice." I heard both her and Rose huff in displeasure. My answer seemed modest enough, so I was confused.
"Details, Bella," Rose told me impatiently, curling yet another chunk of my hair. What details was I suppose to tell them? I was new to this all, so I had no idea what "details" I was suppose to be sharing. And to be honest, it's not like there even were many to be shared at all. Yeah, we kissed a couple of times. We also held hands constantly, and were always close to each other. Was I suppose to tell them that? I just went along with what I assumed to be the right answer.
"Well, he's always really sweet to me," I told them shyly, feeling the blush reach my cheeks. Alice had once told me how pretty it had made my skin look. I recalled Edward saying something along those same lines once too.
"Well we knew that already, we meant how's he sweet?" I could hear the excitement in Rosalie's voice as she eagerly awaited my answer. I wasn't expecting all of these interrogating questions when I came up here, so I was unprepared and at a loss for words. I was afraid that Edward would possibly be mad at me if I told them to much.
"He always holds my hand," I hedged slowly, hoping it was enough. It wasn't. They made me keep going, assuming that there was more. "Um, he hugs me a lot?" I said it sounding more like a question. Did Alice just let out a little squeal? Alright, things were getting a little. . .weird. I figured they were satisfied by my answers so I stopped.
Rose just wasn't going to quit though. "Has he kissed you?" She asked curiously while Alice murmured in agreement with her question. I bit my lip and nodded nervously, keeping my eyes shut and bracing myself for whatever odd reaction they'd have next.
They both squeaked excitedly and exchanged their comments, "Oh my god, how cute!" Alice had sang. "That's is too cute!" Rosalie agreed with her happily. I was almost expecting them to start dancing around the room with how happy they seemed. What was the big deal anyways, people kissed all of the time. They kissed all of the time, and you didn't hear me wanting to throw a party because of it.
Alice kissed my forehead cheerfully as Rose squeezed my shoulders excitedly before they both went back to "pretti-fying me" as Alice had put it. I had rolled my eyes at that. Her and her terms. Rosalie continued to curl and put up different pieces of my hair while Alice continued to put my make-up on. I was really nervous at how I'd turn out. Even more nervous because Edward was in the house, and he'd see me if I looked awful.
So far, I was trusting these two girls though, because judging on both of their appearances, they sure had no problem with making themselves look beautiful. I had never once felt beautiful, because I wasn't. Edward always told me I was, but I guess I just couldn't see what he did. I was ordinary, plain, and definitely nothing special.
I started getting ancy after a while, and got scolded by both Alice and Rose several times for fidgeting too much. A half hour later, Alice declared that they were finally done. Right as I was about to open my eyes, two hands gently clamped over the top of them, being careful not to smudge the make-up. "You can't look yet," Rose cried frantically, "We have to dress you too!"
I groaned quietly and let them lead me into what I could only assume to be one of their rooms. I wouldn't have known; I couldn't see anything. I was horrified at the possibilities of what they would dress me in. Even though the fear wasn't as strong as it would have been with Charlie, I was still scared. What could they possibly put me in?
Rose led me to a bed and allowed me to sit down only if I promised to keep my eyes shut. I wasn't about to battle with either of them, so I gladly agreed and listened to the sounds of them searching through drawers and closets. There was once a knock on the door, but Alice barked profanities and something about self-dignity before the knocker gave up and went back downstairs. I wondered which one of the guys it was.
"Hmm, what about this color, Al?" I heard Rose asked puzzled.
"No, definitely not that color. It won't look right with her skin. Wait. . .what's Edward's favorite color?" Oh god, they wouldn't. Alice practically applauded herself for her apparent smart thinking and they soon began raiding through the blue's of her wardrobe. "Yes, perfect idea!" Rose's voice was approving.
Another fifteen minutes passed on them arguing and deciding when they finally found the right outfit. Alice instructed me to stand up, and I did slowly, letting them discard my clothes from my body. I was wary as to what their expressions would be once they saw both bandages on my arms. The cut and the burn.
"Holy shit, Bella," Rose gasped, appalled, "What the hell did you do to both your arms?" I heard Alice gasp as well after noticing my gauzed up arms too. Thank god I had wrapped them both up the previous night otherwise that evil C would be flaunting itself for the world to see at that very moment.
I quick thought of a brilliant response that wouldn't involve a lot of questioning. "Well," I pointed at the arm with the cut on it, "This one is from my car door. I was fumbling around in the garage in the dark trying to close it when it cut me." I explained slowly. "And this one," I pointed at the wrapped up burn on my shoulder, "This is from cooking. I was baking dinner and I set the pan on the counter, and without paying attention, I leaned up against it and it burned me." I had become I very good liar over the years. I had to have.
"Talk about bad luck," Rose muttered sympathetically. Alice murmured in agreement, and I knew I had fooled both of them. The only problem with my lies were how guilty I felt afterwards. Especially people that were kind to me and didn't deserve being lied to. This was a perfect example. So I made it up to them secretly by holding in all of my whining and complaining as they dressed me and made finishing touch ups.
After an hour and a half, they both announced that they were finally done. I hesitantly opened my eyes, afraid of what I'd see. Of what I'd look like. Before I inspected what I was wearing, I studied the room around me. It was twice the size of my room, even bigger than Edward's had been. It was painted in about every shade of orange you could imagine. The huge bed was in the center, and there were dressers and counters against every inch of available wall space.
Except for on the west wall, where the whole wall was occupied by a mirror. At first, I saw Alice and Rose's eagerly excited faces in the reflection, then I took a closer look at the girl standing next to them. I took a closer look at me. If I thought I was ordinary before, what Rosalie and Alice had done to me had made me farthest from the definition of plain. My jaw fell open before I could stop it.
On my legs, there were skin-impossibly-tight white skinny jeans. At first I thought they'd be hard to move in, but I wiggled my legs the slightest bit and the fabric was surprisingly flexible. For my top, they had chosen a gorgeous royal blue baby-doll fit long sleeve shirt. I secretly thanked them for picking long sleeves verse short so that Edward wouldn't notice my most recent injury. I was surprised at how much I liked the shirt. It felt like it fit my body just right, in fact, it looked like it fit my body just right. The element that captured my attention most was how the bra that Alice had ordered me to wear gently pushed both of my breasts together and up, and had an enhanced amount of cleavage poking out.
Rose had explained to me the wonders of a push-up bra, and I thought that maybe I'd ask to borrow one sometime. I then moved on to study my hair. Rosalie had done something I'd never seen before, curling some strands, crimping some, and just leaving some straight, while taking and putting some of it up into a half pony that was messily-perfect on the center back of my head.
What Alice had done with my face, it was incredible. I was in awe by the way the little bit of eyeliner and mascara highlighted and outlined my eyes perfectly, making them center of attention. She hadn't put on much eye shadow, promising me she wasn't going to over do it, and after seeing what she had done, I wasn't about to complain one bit. The color was a very light shade of the blue I was wearing, and there was just the littlest, perfectest amount to bring out my eyes even more. I almost forgot that the girl in the mirror was me, and I had to keep reminding myself that it was.
For the first time in my life, I felt sexy. It was a feeling I thought I'd never get a chance to experience, but I felt it now. After hearing so much about how sexiness always equaled confidence, I felt that confidence. I felt like I could really be as beautiful as Edward said I was. I was suddenly very anxious for his reaction, and did the best I could to hold back the impatience I had to get downstairs and find him.
For the millionth time that day, Alice squealed loudly and began throwing me numerous compliments to me and herself and Rose at what an amazing job they did. Each time she'd praise herself, I didn't argue once because I felt she deserved it.
"Edward's going to just eat you in this," Rose told me excitedly, laughing at the same time with pleasure. Alice laughed along with her. "We'll have hooked that poor sucker up and caught him like a fish once he sees you." I grinned and giggled a little along with them. "No, seriously Bella," Alice got in between gasps of laughter. "You'll have him wrapped around your finger. Poor boy's gonna be head over heels tonight."
They had invited me to stay for dinner and hang out a little while afterwards. I couldn't help but be a little more than a lot excited. I always enjoyed spending time with them, and by what both of them were saying about what Edward's reaction would be, I couldn't wait. I was absolutely thrilled. And yet, I felt like I was forgetting something.
. . .Charlie. I had forgotten him completely for just a few moments. Now I remembered, and I was afraid again. I feared that once again, he wouldn't be too pleased with my absence away from him yet another night. I knew that there'd be a punishment when I got home, but I'd take it in trade for the night I was about to have. Worrying about him would ruin everything, and I had to push him away completely from my thoughts like I had before. It wasn't going to be easy, but I knew as the night progressed that I would eventually.
"I'm going to go tell him to wait at the bottom of the stairs," Rose told us before disappearing from the room. I didn't think I looked that great. I mean, did I really need to go down a runway for him? This was going to be embarrassing. Remember that confidence, I reminded myself reassuringly.
Alice grinned at me. "Are you ready Bella? This is gonna be great, I only wish that we could have had more time, but you know Edward, he was texting me from downstairs the whole time about how impatient he was. Boys." She rolled her eyes and giggled. I didn't know what she meant by more time, I thought an hour and a half was more than plenty. I spent five minutes if not less in the mornings getting ready. This suddenly had me curious of what time Alice woke up every morning for her own preparations.
Only seconds later, Rosalie darted back into the room with a smug smile on her face. "He's waiting," She and Alice both laughed while I chuckled nervously. Alice noticed it and she rolled her eyes skeptically, "Bella, stop worrying," She snapped at me, "You look totally sexy. It's Edward who you should be worrying about." That got them going in another round of laughter. I had to admit that it was sort of funny at how often this guy got teased by his sisters.
"Okay, let's go," Alice sang, grabbing my hand and pulling me out of the room. She grabbed the bad arm and I cringed a little, but shook off and hid the pain quickly from my face before capturing unwanted attention. Once we were at the top of the stairs, Edward came into view with his back facing us. He was about to turn around when Alice shrieked loudly at him and sprinted down the stairs. Rose and I stood at the top, staring at each other and rolling our eyes. I liked Rosalie.
Alice threw her hands over his eyes in a less-than-gentle manner while he grumbled in protest. "Alice, get off, stop. What's the big deal?" She beamed and nodded at me to come down the stairs. It was a long walk, and thank god they didn't put me in heels or anything otherwise I would have just stumbled the whole way down.
As I approached the bottom, Alice's smile got impossibly wider than it had been all day. I stepped off of the last stair and just stood there, waiting for whatever her plans were next. Alice finally removed her hands from his face and he sighed in relief.
"You're luck we're family Al, or I would be charging you for sexual assau–" Right as he spun around in my direction, he froze in place. His eyes became twice their original size. His sudden intake of breath caused his mouth to drop open and he blinked quickly a couple of times. I stared back up at him through my eyelashes, biting my lip nervously. His green eyes were warm and they looked back into mine with shock. They soon left my eyes and trailed down the rest of my body. I couldn't help but feel a little self-conscious.
Both Rose and Alice had remained silent too, both focused intently on Edward's reaction. They were holding back pleased laughs. I remained standing still in, waiting for him to say something. It didn't look like he was going to be able to speak anytime soon. That thought brought a small smile to my face, and my slow smile caused Edward to snap back to life.
He smile crookedly at me, my favorite smile, and took a step towards me. "Bells," He whispered, barely audible. Suddenly, the distance was apparently too much for him. "Come here, you," He took one long stride before pulling me tightly to his chest. "You're so fucking beautiful,"He repeated in my ear over and over, and for once, I didn't doubt him.
Alice was scolding at him about how he was going to smear the make-up. He raised and arm and flipped her off before pulling me back into his tight embrace. It felt so right, and it was definitely something I could get used to. The pain in my arm wasn't unnoticeable, it was just overshadowed by the sensation of comfort that Edward was sending through my body.
I heard Rose and Alice's pleased snickers as Edward continued to hug me and shower me with compliments. I wasn't used to being thought so highly of before, so I took it in. Each kind thing he'd tell me, I'd plant a light kiss on his cheek, his nose. The girl's snickers turned into sweet sighs as Edward held my face in his hands and firmly pressed his lips to mine. It was only for a short moment though, because Alice had been right about the make-up.
The way his eyes were looking into mine dazzled me. Alice got impatient and cleared her throat, pulling our attention away from the other. We both stared at her questioningly as she smiled smugly at us. It was starting to get awkward, so I stared down at me feet. Edward naturally reached his hand over and linked his fingers with mine.
"So?" Alice asked anxiously, bobbing up and down happily. I wondered if she ever got tired. I'd feel bad for Edward and the rest of the family if she didn't. I looked up at her and realized she was starting at me so I looked back down and blushed. Edward chuckled.
"Thank you, Alice," He told her genuinely and then turned to Rose, "You too, Rose." What was he thanking them for? Surely he wasn't still referring to me. They both grinned and nodded back at him. I gave them both a small smile as well.
"Well, now that you're done," Edward started, pulling me closer to him and wrapping his arm around my waist, "Do you mind if I borrow Bella for a bit? I've been dying to show her this one place." I almost sighed in relief. Anything to get away from the weird glances that both girls kept shooting me. This also had me curious of where he was talking about – He had already shown me the whole house.
He lead us to the door and turned around to study me once again. His eyes lingered down my body and back up to my face as he frowned. I bit my lip nervously. "Hmm. . ." He paused thinkingly. "You're going to need to wear a jacket, it's getting cooler outside than I thought." We were going outside? Oh, great. This outfit wouldn't be that much comfortable for long.
"I didn't bring a jacket," I told him warily, frowning a little. He quickly smiled at me and suddenly released my hand and disappeared, only to return seconds later, carrying a leather jacket in his hands with a huge grin on his face.
"You can wear this Bells, it might be a little big, but it'll for sure keep you warm," He informed me cheerfully as he stood behind me and helped me slide my arms in. I did it as slowly and carefully as I could without being noticeably in pain. My arm was starting to burn again with a stinging sensation. I tried to hide the pain from my face though, hiding it away from Edward's notice.
Once the jacket was on and zipped up, I looked down and inspected myself and moaned. It looked horrible on me. Normally I wasn't one to care about my appearance, but this was just bad. I looked like a slutty-wannabe-biker-girl. Edward let out a low laugh and kissed me on the forehead. I was surprised at how comfortable I had been lately about our newly found intimacy.
"You look perfect," Even I couldn't doubt the honesty in his voice, so I beamed at him and felt the blush creeping up my cheeks. He reached out to stroke one gently with his thumb, then opened up the door and stepped outside.
He held out his hand for me to take as I stepped down, following his lead. I let my eyes close momentarily, inhaling deeply the scent of fresh spring air. I secretly was taking deep breaths of the wonderful scent of Edward and leather mixed together. They were a surprisingly good combination.
Edward led me through his backyard and into the forest. I was a little nervous how I'd make my way through the twigs, sticks, and bushes, but there seemed to be a little make-shift path to take. He squeezed my hand gently, letting me know that everything was okay. For once, everything felt okay.
EPOV
She had me completely, and she didn't even realize it. It was like I was just seeing her for the first time. Not because of the makeover, but because of how easy and carefree she was being. The confidence was radiating off her, making her more beautiful than I ever imagined she could be, and she didn't even know it.
When I turned around to look at her, it was like someone slapped me in the face. It was like a much needed wake-up call, telling me that this girl was worth fighting for. She was worth whatever it took to get her, and I'd do whatever it took. I was fucking hooked, just like a drug. Her tiny hand felt warm and secure in mine as I led her to one of my favorite places.
I knew she'd love it, based on some of the information I had gathered on earlier when we first met. Her outfit was beginning to become a problem for me. I couldn't stop steeling peeks and glances at her very tightly fit pants, and very perfectly fit shirt. I had always guessed that Bella was petite, but the girl had a figure. She had curves in all of the right places, and I was just seeing them now. Every time I'd look, her cleavage would be taunting me. Her breasts were perfectly rounded, and squeezed nicely together just enough to make me go crazy.
I didn't know why I was loosing it like this, but it had to stop soon, before I did something really fucking stupid. Yeah, I'd definitely need to cut that shit out soon. But those incredible collarbones. . .I was instinctively licking my lips. I wondered how they'd taste if I were to kiss them. Fuck off, Edward! I told myself sternly, internally kicking myself for even thinking such things about Bella. This wasn't the way she deserved to be thought of like, and I remembered the promise I'd made to protect her from the guys who did think of her like that.
I hadn't realized at the time that I'd be protecting her from myself as well. Real fucking pathetic. Instead of focusing on her body, I went for her face. I really had to give it to Alice, at first at the mention of a make-over, I pictured the overly-slutty make-up that most girls wore. Alice gave Bella an innocent amount that brought out her chocolate eyes ever more than I had ever expected.
I had realized that we were almost at our destination when she yawned quietly next to me. She must not have gotten much sleep over the weekend, and I was a little pissed off at myself for making her come with me and walk through the forest. I always could have shown her another time, but since we were practically there, I just continued to lead her slowly, setting a nice, easy pace.
Once we arrived at the small clearing, I brought us both to a stop and looked around at the place. I remembered first finding this place when we moved here, and had gone to it often. She was also looking around, her wide eyes filled with curiosity. I waited until her eyes met mine and cleared my throat. "I like to come here a lot," I told her, pausing and looking around some more.
"It's very beautiful," She said, sounding unsure. She hadn't let me finish.
"I come here a lot because," I answered her unspoken question, "Because it's the perfect place to watch the stars." I may have hated learning about them, but I never minded watching them. That was one thing I remembered that Bella and I shared in common, and that's why I knew she'd like this place. The trees opened in a perfect circle, and the meadow below consisted of soft, blanket-like grass that you could easily get lost in. It was like a fairy tale. Fuck, did I really just think that? Where the hell was all of this sappy crap coming from? I quickly realized that I didn't care, because I knew Bella didn't either.
Her eyes became wide, and then tender. She noticed also how good of a place it was. I hesitantly continued, "You know, cause I remember you telling me how much you like the stars. . ." I paused and glanced down at her. "I like them too." Her sweet smile lit up my heart as she gently rested her forehead on my shoulder. I held on to her hand tighter.
"I know it's not dark enough, or the right time yet, but I promise that I'll take you back here sometime. If you'd like." She didn't take a second to think about it before nodding quickly. I rested my head on top of hers and enjoyed such a serene moment. Moments like these made me realize how wrong of an aspect that I had on dating before moving here. Bella showed me what it was like; What it should be like.
The sun was just starting to dip below the horizon when I remembered Alice and her mention of dinner. I didn't know if Bella was hungry or not, but to be on the safe side I figured it was a good idea to head back to the house. The rest of the family was probably wonder where we had disappeared to.
This time, on the walk back, I did a better job keeping my eyes to myself. After taking the time to really realized how special Bella was, that was what got me to snap out of my teenage-boy-hormonal-self. Instead, I took the time to appreciate the little things. Like how every time I'd steal a glance at her face, she'd blush like fucking crazy and it'd light up her face. Or her soft breaths that eased all of my tense worries. Most importantly, her soft hand in mine, making me know that I had some sort of purpose.
We entered through the back door that lead directly to the kitchen. Sure enough, Esme was preparing dinner with Carlisle at her side. She heard us and turned around with a warm smile on her face. She quick shot me a knowing look while coming to greet us both. "Oh Bella honey, you look so gorgeous," She hugged her enthusiastically while Bella mumbled her thanks and blushed again.
"I hope you both are hungry," Carlisle was now also standing in front of us. It hadn't escaped my notice how his eyes lingered down to the hand I had locked around Bella's. As unashamed as I was, I grinned widely at him, while he smiled and nodded back at me. "We made Italian foods of sorts." He informed us proudly. Carlisle normally wasn't the cook of the family, but he always wanted to help. Fucking suck-up. I almost smirked at his willingness to do whatever Esme pleased. I wasn't upset about it though, or even bothered in the slightest; I couldn't have ever asked for a better person for my mom. After all that Esme had been through, she deserved him.
Avoiding anymore awkward conversation, I pulled Bella along into the dining room. The others weren't anywhere in sight, but the table was set for eight, so I knew they'd be coming. And I was right. Not long after the smell of food began to linger throughout the whole house, one by one slowly made their way down to the dinner table.
"Smells good hubby, we did good," Esme beamed adoringly at Carlisle, rubbing a hand tenderly up his chest before both sitting down. Normally I didn't think such things about adult couples, but they were a hell of a couple – I never got tired watching my mom always look at him like she was still in the stages of new love. Hell, maybe she was.
Not long after we all dug in like the pigs we were, Esme started the conversation. I'm not sure if it was just me, but I had lately been noticing that it was her thing to do. She really enjoyed talking and starting small talk, which was the opposite of me. A lot of times, words would come out and I'd just end up fucking everything I said up. That's why I liked to keep my mouth shut most of the time.
"It's nice to see you here again, Bella," Her heart-shaped face smiled sweetly at Bella, then at me as well. How could I refuse not to respond appropriately to that? As happy as I was, I just grinned right back at her, and then watched Bella swallow her food and wipe her mouth politely.
"It's nice to be here, Esme," She told my mom with that Bella-confidence that I loved. It just made me so god-damn happy to hear it. Hell, I was almost considering starting a fucking glee club by the way the day had been going. I knew Alice would be my first member; The little pixie was practically squeaking throughout the whole damn meal at the sight of us. It was as if she had never seen me with a girl before. Hah, if only, I thought bitterly. If I could take all that shit back, I would; I'd do it in a heartbeat.
I was acting so weird tonight, doing things I never though I'd ever do – I was laughing at all of Emmett's lame-ass jokes, I was being nice to Rose and asking her shit like how her day went, I wasn't making fun of Jasper, and I was actually enjoying my parents presence. It felt like needed some serious fucking therapy if I kept these mannerisms up.
When we had all finished eating, I waited to see what Bella's plans were next. I was secretly hoping for her to stay just a little later, but I knew that she couldn't always be out too late because her dad would get mad. Still though, shouldn't she be entitled to have a little fun? Her eyes met mine and they looked. . .nervous? I couldn't tell.
"How late do you want me to stay, Edward?" She asked me, biting her lip. Oh yeah, that was fucking adorable too. Her eyes stared up at me through her long lashes. She didn't honestly expect me to answer that, did she? I mean, what the hell was I suppose to say? Well Bella, to tell you the truth, I'd actually like you to stay here forever and ever if possible, so I can gaze into your pretty eyes. Yeah, that's what I'd tell her, definitely.
"As long as you want," I told her matter-of-factly, "It's really not a problem how late you stay. We all love you here." At least I wasn't holding back as much anymore. She smiled and rolled her eyes at me. "No seriously, Bella, you don't have to bolt home right after dinner." She chuckled slightly then raked a piece of hair from her face.
"Just a little bit longer won't hurt I guess," Her eyes were starting blankly at nothing, and it almost sounded like she was talking to herself rather me. I wasn't protesting though, because any extra time I'd get with her, I'd use as wisely as possible. Why was I starting to sound like Gandhi? Shit, I needed a day with the guys really badly. I'd talk to Emmett about it later – He'd be game.
I decided to take Bella up to my room and just hang there for a while. Where else was I suppose to go? The living room was now occupied by Em and Rose, the third level was taken by Alice and Jazz, and the kitchen was taken by Carlisle and Esme. My bedroom seemed like as good a place as any. I just hoped I wasn't crossing a line or making anything awkward with having her be in it with me.
I mean, it wasn't like I was going to try to get her in my pants or anything, definitely not. So I asked her if that's where she wanted to go and she nodded eagerly before thinking twice about. Good, at least now I knew it was uncomfortable or anything for her.
I opened the door and instantly let out a sigh of relief that I had cleaned my room over the weekend. Then I didn't have to feel like such a pig when company came. Who was I kidding, I never had company. Definition: At least I wouldn't seem like a fucking slob to Bella.
She released my hand and slowly walked over to my bed like she had last time. I just stood there for a moment before deciding that it was probably okay for me to sit next to her. Once again, it's not like I was going to start feeling her up, no matter how pretty her tits looked. God, focus Edward! You have seen women before, I reminded myself sternly.
I closed my eyes and leaned my head back on my pillow while I felt her eyes follow me. She reached over and began tracing the lines of my palm and fingers lightly with her own. She was sending tingles throughout my whole body as I breathed relaxedly. I opened my eyes and gazed up at the ceiling, letting her continue with her soft stroking.
"Edward," She suddenly whispered. I shot my eyes to hers and they were completely smoldering. "Will you play your guitar?" She bit her lip and nervously looked down and then back at me. I didn't answer at first before her voice turned into even less then a whisper. I wasn't sure if I even heard it at first. "Please, for me?"
She seriously thought I was going to say no to her? Hell, she didn't even need to throw in that little almost-whine – Which by the way, was too damn sexy for her own good and she didn't even know it. – She had me at 'Edward'.
Without moving my hand from her soft fingers, I sat up and I reached over and picked up my guitar. I never did really play for anyone, but if Bella wanted me to, I sure as hell wasn't about to refuse. I hesitantly look my hand that she had and brought it to the strings. The song I started strumming out indifferently wasn't even familiar to me. It was if the notes were just naturally coming, and whatever feeling inside of me was letting itself out.
Bella was staring at me, wide-eyed in awe as I continued to play this unfamiliar piece. I kept my eyes on her the whole time while playing, not being able to pull them away. The connection we had always seemed to have was definitely there, and I could some how feel that being put into the melody as well. I was never one for improvisation, but whatever I was playing at that moment sure didn't seem like I was making it up.
The song was familiar, yet completely foreign. I continued playing for a little while longer as Bella sat silently listening. I didn't mind playing for her, in fact, I'd play for anytime she'd ever want me to. Another promise to myself. The list was beginning to get long, but I knew by giving it all I had, I'd manage to accomplish everything on it. After all, I had already gotten her to smile. For now, that was enough for me.
Eventually the song slowly faded off, and without saying a word, I gently set the guitar down on the floor. Bella's eyes were unfocused and they weren't looking at me, but at something unknown. That's something I'd noticed about her from day one – She zoned out a lot. I was cool with it though, because really, how could I complain? Just having her here was enough.
I never good help but wonder what was constantly on her mind all of the time. "What are you thinking right now?" I hadn't meant to say it out loud, but it just sort of came. She suddenly snapped her eyes back to focus on mine. She gave me a small smile and reached over to take my hand and play with it again. We were now both facing each other, sitting cross-legged on my bed.
"That was stunning, Edward," Her voice was sweet and tender, and her words caressed my skin like velvet. "Really, it was beautiful. Beyond words. I didn't know you could play that way." Her honest little compliments meant more to me than she could ever even imagine. So many times I had thought about just giving up and quitting the damn thing, feeling like it was a wasted effort to even continue practicing. Her words were just the ones I needed to hear, so I smiled crookedly at her, the one that always seemed to make her smile.
I was starting to surprise myself with all the little details that I had been picking up about this girl, but I guess that it was to be expected, given the amount of time we were together. I knew there was always something I was missing though. I had no clue what it even was, but I knew it was something. Many times I had decided whether or not to find out what that something was, but it just never seemed like the right thing to do. I knew she'd tell me when she was ready, and I'd respect her on that decision.
"Thanks Bells," I smiled at her genuinely as I reached my hand up to lightly stroke her cheek, causing my new favorite color to become present. She always made my heart do funny things, and she didn't even know it. She didn't know how much I cared about her, she didn't know how brilliant and beautiful of a person she was, she didn't know that she was special. That's why I needed to tell her, but I couldn't. I needed her to figure those things out on her own, because however many times I'd try, I could always see that doubtful look in her eyes. I needed to let her find herself, just like I had.
Sure, I'd definitely help her along the way, showing her these things the best I could, but I couldn't do it all. I knew that. A big part of it was how she looked at herself. Bella never saw herself clearly, but I think tonight, given the proper courage and confidence, she had. And fuck it, if having my whacked-out sisters give her a damn make-over everyday, I'd convince her to do.
It wasn't the make-up or the clothes that made her beautiful though, it was the confidence. I didn't ever want to see her look at herself with self-disgust any longer, because I just couldn't bare it anymore. I couldn't take that she thought about herself that way, and I'd make it stop. I'd make it better because I knew that I could, and that she deserved it. She had already saved me, after all.
After a moment of silence, I heard her sigh quietly and looked up to meet her eyes. They were sad. Broken again. I didn't know what to say or do, so I waited for her. She spoke quietly. "I think I should probably get home," I didn't want her to leave, but I knew she had to. Something about her tone suggested that she wasn't too thrilled about the separation either. Maybe that was just my imagination running wild.
"If you have to," I stood up and helped her steady herself as she stepped off of the bed. She cringed a little at a pain I didn't know, took a deep breath, and was in my arms before I knew it. She buried her face in my chest and held on tightly. Bewildered but willing, I hugged her back adoringly. She didn't let go for a long moment, and when she finally pulled her face away, I thought I caught a glimpse of moisture on her face.
I couldn't tell though, because her hair fell over her face as she stared at the ground. Was she crying? I panicked. Had I hurt her? God, I'd fucking kill myself if I had. I felt like such an ass. She even sniffed quietly once, and that was when I knew that she had for a fact been tearing up.
I didn't understand. Her face went from confident and happy, to suddenly pained and broken. I wanted more than anything to figure this out once and for all, but I restrained myself from asking. I wasn't about to start being a prick about it and bugging her. If she wanted to tell me, she could. I'd figure it out though, and I'd do it soon.
I kept my hand securely on her waist as we made our way to the front door. Her sad eyes looked up at me through her lashes once again, so I figured one more quick hug wasn't going to kill either of us. As much as I wanted to, I didn't push my luck for a kiss. I knew that now wasn't the time.
Pulling away from her embrace was the hardest thing. I wanted to keep her there and keep her safe from whatever she was fearing. I didn't want her to be scared anymore, and I wanted to show her that it was okay to live life to the fullest with no regrets. Instead, my lame-ass self planted a light kiss on her forehead like I was her fucking dad. She smiled slightly though, so I didn't beat myself up about it too much.
Right before she stepped outside into the darkness, she quickly turned around with wide eyes. "I should probably change, I bet Alice will want her clothes back," She was shaking her head embarrassedly. I just rolled my eyes at her. If anything, Alice would be over-joyed that Bella had a new outfit to wear.
I quickly reassured her. "No, trust me, Alice wants you to keep it." She grinned and let out a slight chuckle before the serious face came back again. I wanted to smooth out that crease in the center of her forehead and relieve her of all her stress. I was wanting a lot of things tonight, and none of them I could have.
"Goodnight, Edward," Her eyes flickered with just a hint of that earlier joy that had been sparkling in them. Words couldn't escape my mouth for some reason, so I nodded back and smiled at her, crossing my arms and leaning against the open door as I watched her get into her truck and drive away.
All I could think of in that moment was Bella. Her presence surrounded my very being as I registered in her scent, her face, her voice, her wind chime-like laugh, all into my mind. I wanted those to be the things that I could always remember in bad times. I wanted to remember her, always.
Okay, confession time guys.
I was still feeling horrible about Bella's burn, so I decided another light-hearted chapter would be best. Like I said last chapter, I'm trying to establish their relationship at this moment.
This chapter was too damn fun for me to write. Seriously, I had a smile on my face the whole time. You gotta love fluff. And make-overs. XD
One last thing; Since the next chapter will start out in EPOV, you won't find out what happens to Bella when she arrives home. Here's your answer – Terrified as ever, she's relieved to find a passed out Charlie on the kitchen floor with twelve beer bottles scattered around the floor. She quickly heads up to her bedroom before he wakes up and notices.
You know what I'd absolutely love? Reviews.
Yeah, I'd have to admit that I squeal and dance around just a little for each one I get.
So yeah, just know that I love every one's feedback, all of the time.
Reviews are better than an Alice/Rosalie make-over(: