I cannot believe how many wonderful comments were left on that last chapter. You guys are so kind! Thank you so much for every single word, I'm so glad you like this fic. The adoption process is so long and I want to do it justice by writing it properly but I don't want this story to get too boring for you all. Please tell me if it gets too dull! As a thank you for making me smile so much with all your reviews, here is the next chapter! xo
Chapter Eleven:
It was Jane, their social worker, who cornered a dejected Max and Zoe as they were getting ready to leave. She'd noticed how attached they had become to little Eloise.
"Thank you so much for coming today you two, I hope you enjoyed it"
"Yes thank you" Max smiled gratefully, focusing on getting himself and Zoe out the door and back to the hotel. He could see that a mentally and physically exhausted Zoe was struggling to deal with what a strange and emotional day it had been.
"Everyone was admiring how well you got on with Eloise. There is no doubt that you'll be wonderful parents" She told them gently, knowing how easy it was to form attachments to these kids. Max smiled, his hand absentmindedly rubbing circles into the small of his wife's back.
"She's a great girl" Zoe told Jane softly to which she nodded.
"It's such a shame that she's already getting to know some potential families who want her" Jane told them softly. Max nodded knowingly. Eloise deserved a great home, it was just unfortunate that they weren't far enough on in the process to be able to consider adopting her. "But if she's still in need of a family when you're a bit further on in the process I'll be sure to keep you in mind. She really loved you" Jane added. "Are you sure you're both okay?" The social worker asked carefully, worried about the tears that were beginning to form in Zoe's eyes. Max quickly stepped in.
"It's just been an emotional day" Max told Jane gently. "This sort of event gives you a lot of hope but it also reminds you of what a long way you have to go. We've got a lot going on at work as well" He continued, nodding towards Zoe who was attempting to force a smile.
"If you're sure" Jane smiled softly. "Thanks again for coming, I'll be in touch" She added.
"Thanks" The porter called taking Zoe's hand as they left the venue.
Both Max and Zoe had been quiet since they returned home from the event. Max had taken himself to bed for a nap before dinner and Zoe had relaxed in the bath, answering a few work emails. Of course both their thoughts were occupied by the little girl with the big personality that they had met earlier. The event had thrown up all sorts of questions about their uncertain future as well as settling their worries about other issues. It had been a strange experience.
It also seemed so unfair that they had been allowed to create such a bond with little Eloise when so many other families wanted to adopt her. It had caused an awful feeling of false hope. It almost felt like they had found the perfect addition to their family to then be told they couldn't adopt her. How many other times would they meet the perfect child and yet still have an incomplete family? Could anyone make them feel as happy as Eloise had done that afternoon?
When Zoe emerged from the bathroom she found Max sat up in bed patting the spot next to him. Zoe pulled on her dressing gown, naturally settling down next to him. They were quiet for a long while. They were both going through exactly the same emotions but neither could find the words to express it all.
"Do you want to go down for dinner?" Max asked suddenly from where he had his head resting upon Zoe's.
"Can't be bothered" She replied quietly, shuffling around until she was firmly tucked in underneath the duvet. Zoe sat as close to Max as she could without sitting on top of him in a plight for comfort and familiarity. She desperately craved a sense of love and normality after such an unsettling day.
"Weird day huh?" Max suddenly concluded, still trying to gather his thoughts about it all. This time, Zoe just nodded. "I am so proud of you, jugging the clinical lead job and all of this" He added quietly. "I'm struggling with just this, it doesn't half mess with your head"
"You were amazing today" Zoe admitted gently. "I could have cried when I saw you playing with Eloise. You were so good with her" She leant across to place a delicate kiss on her husband's cheek. "It made me so sure we're making the right decision" The consultant added.
"I'm just so sad Eloise will never be part of our family. Will any child measure up to that little girl?" Max asked sadly and Zoe shrugged.
"I really don't know" She replied honestly.
"I know we were taking about younger children but playing with Eloise today was fun, maybe we should consider an older child?" Max asked suddenly.
"There's a selfish part of me that really wants a baby" Zoe replied quietly. "To hold them in my arms, sing them to sleep, hear their first word and hold their hand as they take their first steps" There were tears in her eyes and Max was enchanted at the thought. The image made his heart break and swell all at once. It seemed so unfair that their journey would be so much harder than most couples. "This is the hardest thing I've ever done Max" Zoe added tearfully, resting her head upon her husband's shoulder. "I just feel like it's all my fault that we have to go through all this"
"Don't ever say that Zo" Her husband told her, his voice strong as he lifted her chin to meet his gaze. "This is not your fault, please don't feel like it's your fault" She leant forward to kiss him. Her kiss was as gentle as he'd ever know it, so sincere but so full of love all at once. "This is our story Zoe. So what if it's different to everyone else's? We'll get our happy ending, I promise" The porter told her honestly, his voice was enchanting and she trusted him implicitly. It didn't take long for them to fall asleep in each other's arms that night, both comforted by the other, dreaming of happier times to come.