Well here is my promise to you, because I love you guys so freaking much!

As always, I am eternally grateful for all your amazing reviews, you guys blow me away. True story.

I think there are some pretty solid answers in here. Here's hoping you agree. *fingers crossed*

Leaving Bella the summer of my brother's wedding was difficult. It felt like our relationship, whatever it was morphing into, had grown leaps and bounds during our short time together. We had always been very connected to one another, but we were forging a deep emotional link that was strong and impenetrable. Something that left us both feeling confident and secure, not only in our friendship, but in the way our love was progressing. We had trust. This was what it all boiled down to. In our situation, trust was probably just as crucial as the love itself. But it was subconscious – it was never something either of us thought about, it was just there, deeply embedded into who we were and what we had. It was a part of our friendship and our history. We would never fail one another. We had lost sight briefly of our connection and the separation nearly ruined each of us. We would never do it again, and we both knew that.

Knowing, appreciating, and valuing all of that made walking away yet again both easier and much more difficult. Though we had both vowed to come back to Forks for Thanksgiving, so the few months apart had a bright light at the end to look forward to. They would, however, be undoubtedly long and lonely months, especially after being immersed in her for the latter half of the summer.

I made it through the separation knowing she would again be in my arms by November. This made the angst and the deep, aching need that penetrated my bones and took up residence in my heart like hot, heavy, iron burdens weighing me down whenever we were separated, almost tolerable. But not quite.

And so as the November rain beat against the windows of my father's study, my heart was heavy and my emotional state shattered. The room was situated at the back of the house, overlooking the pool and the back corner of the porch and the south-westernly winds thundered loudly, pushing angry sheets of water at the thin panes of glass…mirroring my mood precisely. I was curled up on one of the big leather couches, my feet pressed against the side of my dad's big oak desk, and the hood of my sweatshirt pulled over my head. I balanced my elbows on my knees and my forehead in my hands. My cell phone balanced on one knee where I had left it after begrudgingly saying good-bye and flipping it shut roughly.

My dad passed by the open doorway in the hall, glancing in, then backtracked noticing I was sitting there. He stood at the door for a moment, his head cocked to the side. I could see him out of the corner of my eye.

"You okay?" he asked, coming in and taking a seat in the club chair opposite me. His brows were firmly drawn together and his face was perplexed. My father knew me better than anyone, aside from Bella, and he knew that I had a tendency to let little things aggravate me until they spiralled and I was an irrevocable, brooding mess. He was clearly hoping to intervene and derail the process before it got too out of hand, regardless of its source.

"Not really," I grumbled, too far gone.

"Hmm. Well, what happened?" His voice was steady and soothing, years of doctorial practice coming to his aid.

"Bella has some stupid thing she has to do for the university, so she's stuck in Tempe this weekend," I muttered into my palms, still cradling my own head and staring at my knees.

"Ah," he sighed in an enlightened tone that instantly annoyed me.

"What do you mean, 'ah'?" I sneered, looking up at him through narrowed, grumpy eyes.

He raised his eyebrows in surrender, shaking his head. "Nothing." His curt response only fuelled my admittedly juvenile and unwarranted frustration.

"Oh no, you mean something. Let's have it," I growled. I was disappointed and looking for either a distraction or some way of blowing off some of the rapidly accumulating steam, depending on what he had to say.

"Edward." It was a caution. He was warning me to either man-up and deal with my frustration in a respectful manner, or to shut the fuck up – my choice. I loved my dad, he was the kindest, most gentle man I knew…and he never took any shit.

I rolled my eyes and pushed off the desk with my feet, sinking into the large couch, staring past him and seeing nothing. The wall of brightly coloured books blurred across my eyes as I sulked and ached for Bella. He sat there with me for a while, the silence neither heavy nor tense, just there. He happily observed me, his middle child, no longer a scruffy, muddy, mess with missing teeth and a tee ball jersey on. I knew it was hard on my parents, having me live in New York City, but we all knew that I had every intention of returning to Washington once I had all my degrees in tow. Though I had a hunch that they lived in fear of something ultimately tethering me to New York, or the east coast in general – a job, a woman, an acquired love of the city. But my heart and my home were never anywhere near the east coast – they had no way of knowing just how true that was.

Though as I refocused my eyes at the kind, quiet man sitting across from me, slowly rubbing his fingertips against themselves while staring contemplatively at the floor, I wondered if perhaps he knew more than he let on. I was riding an emotional rollercoaster and I was incredibly tempted to prod at the situation, desperate to discuss how utterly devastating the news truly was to me.

"Dad?" He looked up instantly, his eyes locking on mine. His expression was whimsical and soft. He waited for me to say something further. "It really sucks that Bella isn't coming home," I muttered, intentionally leaving the door wide open if he wanted to saunter through it. I waited.

"I know, Edward," his eyes twinkled in that wise, fatherly way.

More silence.

"Do you remember," my father began after a few minutes, drawing out the words in his I'm-going-to-tell-you-a-really-important-story-now tone. "There was that time when your mother was away at a conference in San Francisco when you kids were really young? Remember? And grandma stayed with us for a week to help look after you all during my shifts at the hospital. I think you must have been about four at the time.

"Anyway, do you at all remember the day that I had to come retrieve you from your preschool because you were being sent you home early for a 'violent outburst'?"

He laughed and trailed off, looking to me to see if I recalled any of the oddly timed trip down memory lane he was recounting for me. I only vaguely recalled something about him picking me up once and taking me for ice cream…which clearly made no sense and so I figured it was a different time. I eyed him dubiously, wondering where he was going with the story. I humoured him and shook my head 'no', encouraging him to continue.

He smiled that wide, reminiscent smile my dad always seemed to have on his face and laughed. "Yeah, I guess you were quite young. Well, I had no sooner dropped you, Alice, and Bella off at the preschool and arrived at the hospital when the nurse's station paged me for a phone call. It was the preschool requesting that someone come get you. Since grandma didn't drive, I had to make arrangements at the hospital, calling in over worked and irritated doctors who needed the time off, to cover for me so I could come and get you. Admittedly, I was quite upset with you and not the happiest dad as I was led through the classroom and into the back yard where you were waiting for me. There was a teacher sitting on the edge of a sandbox while you and some other boy with an ice pack over his eye sat cross-legged in front of her…waiting. Do you remember yet what I'm talking about?"

He waited for my response. I shook my head, a pleasant smirk on my face, delighted by where the old story was going. I wracked my brain trying to remember the incident he was speaking of but couldn't. He continued.

"Well, apparently, you kids were outside playing. The teacher told me that you were swinging pleasantly in a swing, then all of the sudden jumped off, marched over to the sandbox, yanked a metal fire truck out of some poor boy's hands and clocked him right over the head with it without warning. This obviously did not sound like my son at all, so I thought there had to be some mistake. But you chimed in immediately, completely unabashed about what you had done and assured me that it was in fact you who attacked the little boy. Then you qualified as to why you do such a horrible thing. You were fuming mad as you explained it to me. Your little hands were trembling and your voice shook. You told me that while you were swinging you were watching Bella while she played in the sandbox. Apparently she was working very hard to build a nice sand castle. You described how she had decorated it with daisies and built a mote around perimeter. You told me that she was very happy and proud of her little piece of sand architecture and showing it to a friend. And then the boy smashed his fire truck into it, levelled it mercilessly, and laughed as Bella started to cry....so you pummelled the crap out of him until the teacher pulled you off."

I had absolutely no memory of this incident whatsoever, but by the time he finished his story I was laughing loudly and nodding, congratulating my four year old self for a job well done. I found the entire image of me kicking the shit outta some clown who messed with Bella both hilarious and entirely believable...I would do the same thing as an adult.

"My point is...you were only four, Edward." My dad looked at me, his voice suddenly lower and more serious. And in that moment I realised that he had understood everything all along, without anyone ever having to paint the picture for him. It was an easy picture to paint.

"You have always been drawn to her," he continued. "You have always fought for her and protected her. Your friendship has always been something of beauty, something fairytales are made of. You have always had this urge to gravitate toward her in a very significant way. It's something that we have all noticed right from the beginning. It would be an understatement to say that I am not at all surprised by the way your relationship is now developing."

I didn't really have a lot to say. I just sat there nodding in agreement with him. Everything he said was true. I had always felt a tangible pull toward Bella, something stronger than the both of us. Something I had never tried to fight but had always embraced. I loved her from birth, literally, and never wanted to spend a moment without her. I was always hyperaware of her presence, or lack thereof, as the case unfortunately was. Every piece of who I was intrinsically as a person had a counterpart in Bella. We matched and balanced one another perfectly; it was why everything had always been so effortless, so flawless between us.

"So while I could not condone the use of violence with the little boy," dad continued after a few minutes of quiet contemplation. "I think that from that moment I knew that you and Bella were connected on a very fundamental level, and that you were destined to have a great attachment to one another. I always accepted that your friendship would supersede anything I could ever imagine. It was something in your little, four year old eyes, and the way they sparkled when you talked about her. It was the fire you had in you as you retold the story of your vengeance.

"After we left the school I took you to the ice cream shop down the street so we could discuss the morning's events. We sat and talked for a long time you and I. I think it was the first real conversation we ever had. I tried to explain a more appropriate way to handle such situations, while you explained why you were so angry and how much you liked Bella and never wanted anyone to make her sad or cry like that boy had.

"Edward…it has always been this way with you two. You have always been inseparable. And you have always been there for one another. With everything that Bella has gone through, every time things got difficult she noticeable leaned on you for support. And without fail you have always been there to carry her weight willingly and happily. It humbles and honours me to even be allowed to bear witness to how beautiful your companionship is. I can't tell you how proud of you it makes me to see how gentle and devoted you are to her. Regardless of the exact definition of your relationship, I respect how kind and adoring you are to her, and vice versa. It takes a good man to continuously act with such devotion. You've turned into a good man, Edward. That is was makes me the most proud.

"And the thing is...everyone gets how attached you two are, but I think we have always taken it for granted. Its just something that's always been there, something no one pays any attention to anymore. Your relationship, your affection toward one another - it is almost commonplace after all these years. It's just a given that where one is the other will be, or that you will be affectionate and whisper back and forth and laugh secretively with each other. That was perhaps what made it so difficult to sit back and watch when you two grew apart after high school. The tension in the air was palpable whenever you were around one another. After seeing it all blow up between you two last Christmas, I think that was when I personally stepped outside of the box and wondered for the first time if there was more between you than I was perhaps noticing. After you stormed out of the house and when Bella finally went outside to get you, both your mother and Charlie wanted to run out there and force you both back inside, especially after you hadn't come in after several hours. You owe me for that by the way." His voice dropped on the last sentence and changed in tone completely. It caught my attention. I had been listening carefully but looking off into the distance out one of the windows, recalling that night on the porch, the night everything bad fell by the wayside and I gained everything real, everything I had been missing. Everything.

I looked back up to him. He had one eyebrow cocked and a devious smirk on his face. I was a little confused. He could tell.

"C'mon, Edward. When was the last time you have ever seen Charlie drink anything but beer? Well that night he was throwing back the vodka and tonics that I was forcing on him...strong ones at that. Grey Goose can get you inebriated much more efficiently…say…if someone thought it would be wise to keep someone else on the couch instead of roaming around outside looking for children who were otherwise occupied."

I gaped at him as he chuckled to himself with the memories of the night from his perspective. Though he was no longer looking at me, intentionally averting his eyes while a telltale pink hue crept up from the collar of his shirt. I redirected my gaze back out the window, wondering what exactly he knew from that night – when it hit me. I got up and walked to the window. I cursed under my breath for a good two minutes straight, placing my palm on the glass and looking down at the porch. I spun around and found my dad no longer laughing but rather watching me with an expressionless face as the wheels turned in my brain. I shook my head slowly willing it to be so. He nodded in contradiction. It was my turn to go every shade of pink imaginable.

"Please tell me you're kidding me," I whispered, looking at the floor and feeling more like a fourteen year old that got caught wanking off and not a twenty-two year old man who presumably would be making love to his girlfriend.

"Frankly, part of me wishes I was," he laughed awkwardly. "But no, I'm not kidding. A few hours after you stormed out I came up here to grab the good bottle of scotch that I had left on the liquor cart. I saw enough to finally snap a few puzzle pieces together in my head. And I'll admit that I've looked at you guys much differently since that night."

"No shit," I sneered, cheeks flaming.

"No," he laughed, "not like that, Edward. I just mean...everything seems so obvious now. But before that night I honestly never saw it. But now that I do it all makes perfect sense and I can reflect on your relationship and see the natural progression you two have made. And of course, Edward, you should know that I have never mentioned what I witnessed to anyone, not even your mother. Well...especially not your mother."

I rolled my eyes and sighed, horrified at the idea and still embarrassed that even he saw whatever it was that he saw, depending on the time he looked out the window. But leave it to my dad to diffuse an awkward situation expertly. Thinking about it all only made me ache for Bella even more, unfortunately. Though I did have an odd sense of peace washing over me at the realisation that my father understood the true depth of my feelings for Bella. It felt nice to finally have somebody know.

Dad walked over to the aforementioned liquor cart in the corner of the room that was always aptly stationed by the pool table, and poured out two fingers of something caramel coloured into tumblers. He came back to the sitting area where I had again flopped back onto the couch. He handed me a glass, silently held his up to mine and took swig, toasting all that had been revealed. I followed suit. After swirling what I discovered to be the bastard "good scotch" around in his glass for a minute, staring idly into the crystal, he looked up at me with respectfully curious eyes.

"So, where does this leave you?" he questioned politely. "If you don't mind my asking."

I took a deep breath. My gut response was to tell him fuck if I knew, but somehow that seemed inappropriate after the refined and earnest method with which he breached the subject, deliberately building my trust and choreographing his appreciation of my feelings for Bella. I wanted to give him something more than the crude, knee-jerk response. I thought about it for a few minutes. He granted me all the time I needed while sipping his scotch and smirking into the glass.

"Lonely," I whispered after much thought.

It was pretty much the only thing I could formulate. It was such a small answer in comparison to the time it took to derive, but dad did not begrudge me. Instead he murmured an "I bet" and took another sip from his tumbler.

"In love," I added, meeting his eyes, wanting the gravity and the truth behind the statement to register with him. He nodded. I felt the need to clarify further.

"I mean...everyone knows I love Bella, that's a given. But its different now. I don't love her the way Emmett loves her, I love her...so much more." I broke off as emotions pricked at my eyes, halting my words until I could breathe without a hitch.

"I understand," he assured me. "So it's been almost a year since then. What's going on?"

At some point I knew I would have to explain exactly how long things had been occurring between Bella and I, and that it didn't all start that night...but I didn't feel that moment was the time. I wasn't quite ready to take that large of a leap. Instead I answered his polite inquiry while focusing on the present and not divulging our lengthy history. Again, I thought long and hard before I spoke, needing the next words out of my mouth to be perfect.

"To be honest dad...we've never really sat down and had that conversation. But I know we are on the same page. I mean…it kills me not to be near her. It actually physically hurts, like a real pain, in my gut and in my bones. Everything aches. All the time. And it's getting worse. It hasn't always been like that, not this bad. I used to…well…I actually don't remember what it feels like to not be both suffocated and liberated by my love for Bella. I just know that I can't fucking breathe when I'm not around her. And I don't know who I am separate from her. I feel like everything that I am is her. I am the truest form of myself when I'm with her. It's the most natural thing I have ever done…loving her.

"I really just I think we are both kind of muddling through right now. Its like we have our heads down and were just pushing forward without much thought or discussion. Were just trying desperately to get through the next few years until we can be in the same place at the same time and really focus on us, and being together properly. Because as it stands we are separated so often, that if we focused on it, or allowed it to become an item of discussion it will only make it that much more real, and painful. I've always planned on attending Columbia's grad program, everyone knows that. And at the fucking rate that Bella's going her undergrad is going to take her another couple of years. We just need to get through these next few years. I mean, Jesus, dad, we've waited our entire lives to finally have each other like this...we can survive a couple more if that's all it takes."

"And then what," he asked quietly, not wanting to pry too much, but clearly hoping I would divulge more.

"What do you mean 'and then what'?" I sneered. "And then I can finally and happily claim everything I have ever wanted. Bella will be a Cullen someday, dad, I can promise you that."

I wasn't looking at him, so I couldn't be sure, but I thought I heard a faint gasp at my bold declaration. Which really wouldn't have made any sense given that what I was saying was not that shocking in any way. Bella had always been family, and I had every intention of making it official someday by marrying her. It was just that first, ideally, we would live in the same time zone and more people than just my dad would know how serious we were. Until then...

Muddle through.

"So...," dad said, eyeing me with his serious brows knit together.

"What?" I scoffed. Jesus, what more did he want from me? I had just admitted that I wanted to fucking marry the woman, did he want an exact date?

"So," he continued, smiling at me. "Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Your seminars are Wednesdays and Fridays, right? This Friday's has been cancelled due to the holiday...if I am doing the math right...doesn't that give you six days with nothing to do after tomorrow?" He looked at me as if I was mentally slow...which apparently I was. He was fucking brilliant. I grinned like a fool. Then sprinted to his desk immediately to use the computer and book some plane tickets, leaving my scotch on the coffee table in front of the couch. As I began clicking links I looked up and noticed dad walk over and down the rest of my drink. I chuckled, I couldn't blame him. A lot had been revealed in that room by both parties that night. And it felt fantastic.

After giving my family, and especially my mother, everything I had in me for two days, trying desperately to compensate for all the holidays I had inexplicably missed out on and how much of an ass I was the year before, I was on a plane bound for Phoenix.

I was nervous. Why the hell was I nervous? I guess because I had never been to Bella's collegiate world before. We both had completely separate lives in our own little corners of the country that were reserved for our studies. I mean, I knew all about her roommate, and the little apartment that they shared on campus, and she had described in painful detail every inch of campus a hundred times over…but still…I had never actually been there. And I knew she was busy writing something for the university paper that she worked on, covering some festival that they held annually at that time of the year. I was just afraid that I would be in the way or that it would be weird that I just unilaterally decided to come visit. It seemed like a much better idea in my fathers study submersed in heartfelt conversations of her and upset by her absence. The closer the plane got to Phoenix the more my nerves were heightened. But also, I was so fucking excited to see her.

After I landed I text Bella. No surprise that she was at the Café Biblioteca, her self-professed home away from home just outside the Hayden Library on campus.

Fuck I miss you, Bella. Are you working hard? – E

You swear too much. And I miss you so bad my heart actually hurts. I'm just having lunch at the café working on this stupid assignment. – B

How is it coming? –E

Done. Just being nit-picky with it now. You know me. –B

I'm glad you're done. –E

I made my way to the café with a dopey smile stretched across my face. There was a definite spring in my step and a flutter in my heart at the idea of seeing Bella in the next couple of minutes, not to mention the idea of wrapping my arms around her and planting the hugest, most passionate kiss imaginable on her in broad daylight with no regard for who saw us. I blended seamlessly with the students who remained on campus over the holiday weekend as I walked among them toward the café, my messenger bag slung over my shoulder. I smiled to myself as I pulled open the door to the café, several people exiting at the same time. I let them through the doorway first, holding the door open and scanning the little room for Bella, my heart dancing. My phone buzzed again just as I walked into the café.

Me too. But it still doesn't change how horribly this weekend turned out. –B

I read her last message with a smile. Perfect.

In the corner, tucked away from everything else, was an array of deep seating chairs and couches surrounding a low coffee table. Bella was curled up in a chair, her knees tucked beneath her, her cell in her palm, and her laptop balancing on her lap. There were two large coffee cups next to her that looked empty and a barely touched yogurt.

Well, that's a shitty lunch, I noted, grinning as I approached behind her quietly. I vowed to set the matter right personally by treating her to a far more superior dinner.

I stood behind her, grinning down as she sat completely oblivious to my presence, chewing on her lip and scanning the article she had typed on her laptop. She looked so fucking adorable in all her collegiate glory. Her tattered jeans and ASU hoodie, a pair of chucks curled under her legs. But the thumb of her right hand beat steadily against the edge of her laptop and her knee bounced, I knew those were signs of trouble. She was upset. And considering her article was finished on time I assumed it was regarding her last text message, how horribly this weekend turned out.

I crouched down and hovered over her left shoulder, so I could whisper in her ear, knowing I was going to scare the shit out of her but thinking it would be kind of funny.

"I beg to differ," I whispered slow and seductively into her ear, smirking like a fool.

Bella screamed, clapping her hand over her mouth. She spun around to the back of her seat to face me. I expected as much, and snickered as I watched the display. Her eyes were huge, her hand was still hovering over her lips, and she was panting. Her eyes softened and then grew excited all in a matter of seconds.

She hoisted herself up onto her feet on the cushion of the chair and catapulted off of it and into me. I had to reach out and grab her, holding her to me in order to catch her and keep her from falling. I could do nothing about the chair as it tipped over and crashed loudly to the floor at my feet. She wrapped her legs around my waist and threw her arms around my neck, squealing, not from terror but from delight. Then, without further indication, she kissed me. The kiss was as huge and passionate as the one I had planned on laying on her. Her fingers twisted in my hair and she tugged at it forcefully, demanding I get closer. Her tongue met mine greedily and she sucked and swept her lips across mine with an uninhibited hunger, moaning and whimpering into my mouth. I held her there, my arms laced tightly around her back, the chair crashed at my feet, her fingers tugging at my scalp, and our kiss the only thing in the universe worth dedicating any attention to, for what felt like decades. I was an instant fan of reckless abandon.

It was perhaps the most beautiful moment of my life. In addition to relief at holding Bella, literally, in my arms, and the weight of each emotion as it coursed and flamed through me, Bella's sweet, soft, little voice whispered at the break of each kiss murmuring the most wonderful words my aching heart had ever heard.

"Edward…I love you. I love you. I love you…"

Say it with me...

"AWWWWWWWWWWW!"

Right?

These kids are just too damn adorable. I love them!

Wonder what Tempe has in store...?

Hearts,

Air

~xox~