As she turns the corner into the hallway outside the choir room, Santana can hear that Rachel is mid-rant. And if she knows anything about Rachel, and she does, she knows her best friend is probably yelling at Puck.

Puck and Rachel have been going out since the summer before senior year, thanks to her awesome matchmaking skills. She may have slept with Finn, but that guy is a total moron who definitely doesn't deserve Rachel.

Yeah, it's totally screwy that she and Rachel are best friends now, considering that she couldn't stand Rachel until well into junior year and that Rachel was fit to be tied when she found out that Finn slept with her. But they got pretty close after her idiot boyfriend (seriously, she has no respect for that guy) made her go to a party even though Rachel hadn't been feeling well all day. She'd totally sung her guts out at Regionals (they won, suck it!) even though she'd felt (and looked) like crap. Then he'd pulled a total Houdini on her once they got to the party. When Rachel had started vomiting like Linda Blair, she and Puck had to race her to the hospital. Turns out appendicitis bonds you for life.

And mostly she's glad that she got Puck and Rachel together, but about once a month they have a total blowout before they go back to be sickeningly in tune. And it's always about stupid stuff like Puck falling asleep during the Tonys or Rachel talking during Mario Kart.

And it's been about a month since their last big fight, so this is right on schedule. It's like a period.

When she enters the choir room, she's not surprised to find everyone already there, watching the entertainment. Someone's even brought popcorn.

"What'd he do this time?" She asks as she grabs a handful of popcorn from the bowl in Kurt's lap.

"From what we can tell, Puck told Little Miss Likes to Fight that he'd, if you'll pardon the vernacular, 'tap' the new girl in his algebra class." No wonder her girl was loco, that boy was a total idiot. She tunes into Rachel's rant, trying to follow her train of thought.

"…and furthermore, I do not think that you have any sort of respect for me or for any female in general if you believe language…" Puck looks like he's ready to blow at any minute, and when he does it's so entertaining. "…you make me feel as though I'm just one in a long line of women that you choose to grace with your presence and…"

Puck's jaw is clenched so tight, it's making the vein in his neck throb. He's gonna blow in 5, 4, 3, 2…

"I love you!" Woah, she totally wasn't expecting that. The whole room just got totally silent.

"Don't shout at me!" Leave it to Rachel to totally miss the point.

"How else am I supposed to tell you? You never let me fucking talk!" Boy's got a point.

"Fine. You want to talk? Talk!"

"I don't actually wanna tap her; I just think she's hot. I don't get all fucking bent outta shape when you think another dude's hot."

"When have I ever said that I thought a 'dude' was hot?"

"Every fucking Thursday night when we watch that damn vampire show with the gay vampires with feelings!" Ha, she knew Puck watched The Vampire Diaries. She's totally using that against him.

"Don't use the brilliance of Craig Ferguson to try to get out of this. And there is a huge difference between thinking that Damon Salvatore is attractive and professing to being attracted to Georgia Tedder." Okay, she's starting to get bored. Get back to the fact that he loves you, chica!

"How is it any different? It's not like you're not gonna meet all these dudes when you're all famous and shit."

"You think I'm going to be famous?" Sure, she locks on to that pretty damn fast. She notices that they're slowly inching closer to each other.

"Course you are. And then all those dudes you think are hot are gonna be after you."

"And that worries you?" Rachel's not fighting anymore.

"What the fuck do you think? Did you not hear me? I love you!" Finally, something's gotten through Rachel's ridiculously thick skin.

"You really love me?"

"I don't lie to you." That's totally true. It's like Rachel's his conscience, 'cause he sure as hell didn't have one before.

"I thought you were just trying to shut me up." They're so close now that Puck is easily able to pull Rachel towards him by her hips.

"I've got way better ways to shut you up, babe." Okay, she didn't need the demonstration. She sees enough of that already.

"I love you, too, Noah."

"Course you do, Rach. I'm fuckin' awesome." Whatever.

You know who's fuckin' awesome? She is. She put that lovefest together.