X. Truth's Madness

Mary Read wanted answers. Would she get them from Kenway? Probably not. Or maybe she would. The Kenway she knew or more easily said, the Kenway that she had met was a reckless, churlish, greedy fucking bastard. But the Kenway sitting on the beach, waiting for her return was…hew was something else. Someone else. He was calm, collected, trained, disciplined. Nothing that she was used to. Nothing that she knew of.

He knew things he shouldn't. She already realized that. It made her nervous, she didn't like it.

She found herself testing him again. She sat in the darkness of the foliage, watching Kenway sit on the beach. She expected him to get impatient, to walk away, to leave her. He didn't. He sat there and watched the sky. He whistled to himself but never moved from where she told him to sit. It wasn't the Kenway she knew. She felt frustrated by him. He wasn't doing anything she expected.

Finally, after over an hour of waiting for him to leave, she turned and went to actually get the wood she had promised she was getting. She came back a short while later to find that he had created an area for her to pile the sticks. There was a circle of stones in the sand and she realized that he had known she was watching him. She dumped the sticks in the circle, feeling her face flush with…what was the emotion washing over her? Frustration, embarrassment. She was considered a Master Assassin after all! She should have been able to fool old Kenway!

But she couldn't…

He had a lot of explaining to do.

She didn't speak as she got the sticks set and the fire going. Only after, when she had sunk into the sand in front of the warm fire did she dare to open her mouth. She needed those moments to calm her thoughts and the anger in her heart. So when she looked up at him, she saw he was standing. He moved to sit next to her, giving her a few inches of space of course, and looked over at her expectantly.

"Tell me everything. I want the truth"

"Of course, you deserve nothing less, Mary" Edward agreed. The way he said her name annoyed her! Like a prayer, like it was...important. Why? He was silent though, looking at the fire. Finally he looked at her and the saddest smile she'd ever seen him wear came across his face. "You're beautiful, you know that Mary? It's so nice to see you…like this rather than…" He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"You're acting strange tonight, Kenway" She stated, ignoring his comment. "Or…well you've been strange since…"

"Since 1715." He answered her. "Since I came back in Nassau with my ship"

"Aye. What happened to you out there Edward?" And she couldn't stop the worry from showing. Despite everything, Edward was her friend. He may have been a right pain in the arse, he may have been someone she couldn't stand at times and yes, he was hiding something from her but she still cared a great deal for him.

"Would you believe me if I told you?"

"What reason would you have to lie to me?" She countered.

He laughed. "True enough. I wouldn't lie to you. Not about this at least." He looked into the fire again and she waited. He seemed to be gathering himself. "I don't…I don't know how much I can tell you. I don't know how much I want to tell you. It's really…It's just fucked up."

He fell silent again, seemingly irritated but Mary had a feeling that he was irritated with himself rather than with her. They were silent again for a long moment and she waited. She didn't know what to say. She just watched him, waiting for him to be ready to go on. Finally he took a deep breath.

"I woke up on that beach in 1715 once and I took that chance and wasted it. I wasted everything, everyone. I didn't care about anything else but my own needs, playing at a façade that I was doing it all for my wife, for Caroline. I wasn't. I was being a greedy fucking sod and I knew it. I just didn't want to say it out loud. I never did, you know. Damn near twenty years later and I didn't have the stones to admit that I was a greedy fucking sod"

"Twenty years? Edward…its only been two…" She didn't understand. She felt her brow furrow with her confusion. She didn't know what he was talking about, he wasn't making any sense.

He pulled his knees towards his chest, throwing his arms loosely over them. He glared at the fire and she could see the frustration clearly on his face. He wanted to explain but he wasn't…or rather he couldn't. Something was keeping him from outright saying it. Then she remembered something he had said before, something she hadn't understood at the time. Her heart thudded painful in her chest as the realization hit her. She felt like she couldn't breathe.

"Twenty extra years of pain…" She stated, her voice just above a whisper. Edward looked at her and nodded stiffly, his lips pressed together. "So…you lived twenty years from now?" He nodded again. "But you're…reliving it?" A third nod. She felt like her head was spinning, it was a lot to take in. How?

"The First Civilization" He stated, as if reading her mind and just like that it all made sense. Of course it was them. They would have had a way to what…make him relive his life over again? But why? Perhaps he knew but couldn't explain. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself.

"You've lived through all this once. You said you knew what type of man Roberts was, but what you meant is that you know what type of man he will be" She wasn't asking questions anymore. She was making statements. It was slowly all coming together. No wonder Edward had seemed so stressed…and yet…

She remembered how he had looked at her when he had returned to Nassau with his Jackdaw. Like a man dying of thirst getting a drink of cool mountain water. She could only imagine that meant that she was not in his future. You're beautiful he said. She felt her brow wrinkle once more while she thought that over. She had not really been listening or reacting to his words then but he had said it so plainly. He had said it like he meant it. Did they have a falling out or did something happen to her?

"What happens to me?" She asked, unable to stop herself. He just looked at her a long moment and then he looked away. In the flickering firelight, she saw a single tear run down his face. He didn't speak and that spoke volumes. One wasn't supposed to question fate and she had. Now she knew the answer, but she doubted he would be sitting here so calmly if it were any time soon. "What becomes of us then, Kenway? Does something…happen? Is that why you're so…" Her sentence drifted off.

"Nothing. Nothing happens with us. I never allowed myself to take my sights off the mountain of gold I was sure the world owed me. So I lost everything" He swatted at the sand, anger clear in his voice. "I lost you. I lost everything. I didn't deserve you anyway"

"Kenway, you're talking like…" Like what? She didn't want to examine it too closely, she didn't want to open up a book she wasn't supposed to read. She shouldn't even be talking to him about this. She wanted to ask though…how did she die? What happened to their friends? To Nassau? To Edward? To his wife? Did he find happiness? Did she before she died?

"I care for you greatly Mary. You've always been a good friend to me, better than I ever deserved" He leaned his head back to look up at the sky. "If I had any sense in my head, I'd tell you to walk away. Leave the West Indies and never come back. Join up with the Assassins anywhere else. If I had any sense I'd go right back to Bristol, grab my wife and….Run. Leave. Go. Join up with the Assassins where ever I end up." He stood and she found herself standing too. "But I don't have any sense and when it boils down to the bone, I'm still a selfish man. I want you here too much to chase you away"

He was suddenly too close for her liking and she realized that Edward was a man who carried much pain in his chest. He was tired and scared. He knew the fates of his friends, of the people he cared for and it was his burden to watch it all happen again. After all, how could he stop fate? If she were to die, she would do it again. Knowing her fate didn't change anything, everyone died at one point or another. All she could hope was to walk into it with dignity.

His hands rested on her shoulders and he leaned down, just a little for she was only an inch shorter than him, so their eyes met. Their faces were so close and she felt herself stiffing, wondering what angle he was playing at. He trusted her but even trust only went so far.

"I will protect you Mary Read, I swear it upon my life. If there is one thing I can save, it will be you. You showed me so much. You are my Mentor, despite everything. I…I admire you greatly" Then he let go and he stepped away, looking off to the side. "I should go."

"Don't" She found herself saying. She didn't know why she was bidding him to stay, what she hoped to gain. "Tell me more. Some good things. There have to be good things. I won't believe a boozy swiltub like you lives only a life of grief"

"Boozy swiltub? Have you been talking to Rhona?" A smile finally came across his features.

"Ah, yes. She told me how you assisted her in Havana. She also told me how she knew you. She lived in Bristol for a time correct?" Mary was trying to keep on a lighter subject, though her mind was racing with what she had learned from him.

"Correct." He said simply, but she could see how distant he was. How sad he really was. She realized how much he had been struggling with what he knew would happen and had happened. She suddenly felt like a bad friend.

"Have things happened exactly as they did?" She was curious. "Wait, I suppose we wouldn't have had this talk last time…"

"No we didn't" He laughed, smiling again at last. "You're still much the same, Mary…And it gives me hope"

"I give you hope?" She raised her eyebrow at him.

"You always did." He reached out and gently slapped her shoulder. "You were my Mentor. My inspiration to…to be better" He closed his eyes, and she frowned a little.

"I'm here now, Edward. And I'll be here." She didn't know why she wanted to comfort him. She did though, she wanted him to know it would be okay. "I'll always be with you"

"Don't." He snapped suddenly. "Please…don't say that. Don't say it like that" The pain was raw in his voice. She had never seen anyone like this, it was so odd. Especially to see Edward so raw, a man whom she had always seen so controlled. He had always seen so sure. To see him in such pain disturbed her. Worse, it made her feel bad for him.

"Kenway…"

"I can't explain Mary and I don't expect you to understand but…I hope you'll be by my side. I'm sure the Mentor would understand if you'd help me. I…I talked to him about this. He understood, he guessed. And in time, I will join them, I will join you." His words were so serious and she wasn't sure if she was really talking to Edward Kenway, a man who claimed he was a greedy sod himself. It didn't seem real, he didn't seem real. Or maybe how he was and how she remembered him was so skewed that she didn't know what to make of it.

They were both silent for a moment, with her not knowing what to say, not knowing if she wanted to comfort him or chide him. Finally he looked up at her, a sad smile on his face.

"Enough of this. How about you fix yourself and this boozy swiltub will take you out for a drink? Like old times?" She wanted to say no, that she had things to do but that smile on his face convinced her otherwise. He was carrying, as he had said, twenty extra years of pain. She wondered what he had seen to make him the way he was now and shrugged the thought aside. She had to focus on the now, as she always had.

"That sounds fair enough. You made me lose one kill after all, I'd say you owe me a drink" And she let herself smile, nice and easy as she began to fix her hair. She knew she'd have to keep her eye on Edward. The truth he had revealed to her could lead to two paths: madness or happiness. Which would he end up in she wondered?

Only time would tell.

A/N: Mary chapter! I miss writing for her so I decided every once in a while we'll get a peek in her mind, but this story IS Edward's and it will mostly be from his perspective. I hope you all enjoyed it from Mary's though. Anyway, have a good day, see you next time!