Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets. I do not own any of the cannon characters nor the plot line of the movie or book in which this may or may not be based upon. I only lay claim to my OC.

DADA

Apparently, things could get much worse. Arriving in Defense Against the Dark Arts, later that day, everyone took their seats and chatted amongst themselves. All except Lellian, who was looking around at her classmates as if they had lost their minds. All the girls could talk about was Gilderoy Lockhart. Ugh! As if to follow that thought, Gilderoy Lockhart himself came down from his office and began to pace before the class. Hermione and several other girls watch him with dreamy sighs. Please...This is sickening. Lellian leans over her desk to nudge Harry and Ron. Grabbing their attention, she nods to the large cage in the room that was covered and would mysteriously rattle on Lockhart's desk now and then. "Let me introduce you to your new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher." He paused and posed himself as he smiled at the class. "Me." Girls in the room gave dreamy sighs as they hung onto his every word. Lellian rolled her eyes. "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League and five times winner of Witch Weekly's Most- Charming-Smile Award." Girls all but swooned over his smile. "But I don't talk about that. I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!" If it was laughter he was looking for, he was getting it. Just a few weak smiles from a few students. "I see you've all bought a complete set of my books. Well done. I thought we'd start today with a little quiz," He said picking up some papers as groans came from plenty of the students in the class. "Nothing to worry about. Just to check how well you've read them, how much you've taken in…" Lockhart begins to circulate papers. Harry and Ron examine the questions

"Look at these questions. They're all about him!" Ron whispered as Lellian leaned in to speak with them.

"'What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite color?"

"What is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?"

"When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday and what would his ideal gift be?" The three looked at each other with a matching look. One begging to be killed now.

"You have thirty minutes. Start...now!" With a resigned groan, Lellian returned to her desk and set to work on writing down the answers to what she did happen to read of these stupid books. Not that she would tell anyone that or let it be witness by anyone.

When time was up, and the exams were turned in, Lockhart rifled through the completed exams at the front of the room. "Tut, tut. Hardly any of you remembered my favorite color is lilac." Lockhart scolded after the test. He shifted through the papers. Looking at them one at a time. "But Miss Hermione Granger knew that my secret ambition is to rid the world of evil and market my own range of hair care potions." Hermione smiled, flattered and sighed dreamily. Lellian rolled her eyes.

"Oh, please..."

"Good girl." Lockhart's expression suddenly darkens as he sets the papers down and picks up his wand. Hermione beams. Lockhart's expression suddenly darkens. "Now!" There was a pause. "Be warned! It is my job to arm you against the foulest creatures known to wizardkind!" The class was pulled to attention as the cage rattled. "You may find yourself facing your own worst fears in this room. Know only that no harm can befall you whilst I am here..." With a showman's flair, Lockhart turns slowly to the cage. "I must ask you not to scream." A pale Neville draws back as Harry, Ron, and Lellian lean forward. Lockhart lets the tension build. "It might provoke them!" He whips off the cover over the cage. Inside the cage are several electric blue creatures. Eight inches tall, with pointed faces and wings. They rattle the bars and pull bizarre faces at the students.

"Cornish pixies?" Seamus laughed.

"Freshly caught Cornish pixies," Lockhart corrected. Unable to control himself, Seamus snorts with laughter. "Laugh if you will, Mr. Finnegan, but pixies can be devilishly tricky little blighters. Let's see what you make of them now!" Lockhart flings open the cage. Instantly, the pixies rocket about. Spraying the students with ink bottles,breaking beakers, and shredding books.

As two dive for Neville, Lellian drops to hide under her desk. Seized by his ears, the pixies lift him into the air, and begin to circle the ceiling. "Come on now, round them up, round them up. They're only pixies." He took out his wand as Lellian used one of her books to whack a few pixies away from her. "Peskipiski Pesternomi!"

"That isn't even a spell!" Snapped Lellian. A particularly obnoxious pixie makes a face, seizes Lockhart's wand and tosses it out the window. Lockhart joins the stampede to the door.

"I'll ask you four to just nip the rest of them back into their cage." The door slammed and the only ones left in the room was Lellian, Ron, who swats a pixie gnawing at his ear, and Hermione. Plus Neville.

"What do we do now?" Together, Hermione and Lellian raised their wands and pointed at different directions of the room for the pixies.

"Immobilus!" The pixies freeze in midair as Neville falls right onto Lockhart's desk. He looks shaken but otherwise unhurt.

"Why is it always me?"

Fresh from the pixies, Hermione, Lellian, Ron, Harry, and Neville walked out of the room. Hair askew. Robes slightly shredded. "Can you believe him?" Grumbled Ron.

"I'm sure Professor Lockhart just wanted to give us some hands-on experience." Hermione scoffed in their professors defense.

"Hands on? Hermione, he didn't have a clue what he was doing!" Lellian argued in disbelief.

"Rubbish. Read his books. You'll see all the amazing things he's done." Ron scoffed.

"He SAYS he's done." He muttered as the five made it back to the Gryffindor common room to clean up and change.