Cat Burglar

Author: LonelyWriter42

Summary: Kittens are notorious for getting themselves into trouble.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto; if I did Neji would become the local neighborhood creepy cat lady.

…

Neji was crouched down next to his bed, glaring at a hissing Hinagiku. Never in a million years would he have ever thought that he would ever be doing something so strange as glaring at a cat but there he was and he blamed his indigo haired cousin for everything.

"Hinagiku," he growled warningly but she didn't get the hint and in fact the fur of her tail somehow became even puffier. He glanced under his bed where his hitai-ate had become a nest for the three kittens he was being forced to take care of. "Now listen here, cat," he growled, "That is my hitai-ate, that I need so I can go out! Those fluff balls you call your children do not need it."

Hinagiku didn't seem to get what he was saying or chose to ignore it because she opened her mouth wider and let out a vicious sounding hiss.

"Oh, so you want to play dirty," Neji muttered. "I can play dirty. I can lock you outside tonight."

Hinagiku's ears flattened against her head and she lunged forward, sinking her fangs into the soft skin of his hand.

"You bit me," he said in shock as she retreated under the bed. "I thought that an animal won't bite the hand that feeds." He reached under the bed and grabbed her tail with the intent of throwing her out of his room when something else started biting at his ankles. "Gah!" He roared, spinning and grabbing Kyo. "Why is the whole world conspiring against me today?"

Three pathetic meows came from under the bed and he winced. "Reminding me to skin Hinata later, are you?" he muttered as he stood up. He grabbed some bandages and started wrapping them around his forehead. "Fine," he muttered under his breath as he exited his room. He shut the door with a slam, stopping Kyo from dashing out after him. "Stay in there all day for all I care."

…

"But why can't I see them?" Hinata asked, running her pointer finger over his cheek in a circular motion. "They are mine, you know."

Neji looked up at her and gave her the glare that usually had Gai and Lee running for their lives, only, with her it induced giggles. "Because they are being punished."

"Why are you punishing them?" She shifted slightly so she was snuggled up against him more tightly. "They are only cats."

He scowled, knowing what she was trying to do. "They are being punished because they have taken to thievery."

"They are cats," she repeated, shifting again so she could kiss him. "Please?"

"Trying to bribe me?" He questioned, knowing she would win.

"Maybe," she giggled as she kissed him again.

With a groan he sat up and gently pushed her away. What had started out as a simple walk with her had turned into a heavy make-out session that he was still trying to sort out in his brain. He didn't know when she had gotten so bold. Or when he had for that matter. Usually he didn't like to institute physical contact and was usually wary of it but with Hinata he didn't mind. The realization that he could love someone other than himself with such a passion scared him sometimes if he thought about it for too long; but right then all he cared about was her slender arms wrapped around his waist.

"They stole my hitai-ate," he muttered.

"They like it because it smells like you," she replied.

He frowned at that. "You know, I've been missing other things lately. A sock, some of my bandages, that hat thing my mother gave me when I was eleven which is atrocious…"

"It sounds like you have a cat burglar on your hands," she giggled as she sat up. "Or kitten burglars."

"I think it is only one of them," he said with a growl. "I know which one it is too. C'mon, I suddenly feel like strangling a cat or two."

"Neji," she moaned as he jumped to his feet and started off down the road. "You wouldn't kill my cats, would you?"

…

"This is what she has been doing all morning," Neji informed Hinata as she sat down next to his bed and slowly extracted Hinagiku from under it. The cat was hissing and sputtering at her but Hinata with gentle touches and soft words had the cat purring on her lap a minute later.

"You are a miracle worker aren't you?" Neji asked in a perplexed voice.

"No, they are just my animals and they love me more than they love you," she said smugly.

"I'm the one that lives in the same room with them. Maybe they should take my happiness into consideration when they start their hissing wars," he stuck his lower lip out to get her sympathy but she was ignoring him.

"Let's see all of what they have stolen," he said to no one as he extracted three kittens from under his bed and grabbed the bed that had been made out of his stuff. His hitai-ate he stuffed into his pocket so he could put it on later. The bandages he had been missing were on top of the pile and he threw them into the laundry bag his mother had insisted that he keep in his room so she could easily collect the laundry. The hat-thing he tossed back under the bed figuring the cats could get more use out of it than he could. Some of the other stuff in the pile was more shocking, though.

The sock he found was not the one he had been looking for but one of the expensive silk tabi he only wore for formal Hyūga occasions that required formal dress. He glared over at the things that were now crawling all over Hinata. How they had managed to get into his dresser drawers was beyond him. The tabi went into his pocket as he picked up the next item. It was one of his workout shirts that had the tear in the sleeve from where Tenten had managed a lucky blow only because he had been distracted by Gai at that moment. Since he didn't like admitting his own defeat to anyone he tossed it under the bed too.

The next article of clothing took the cake though. Somehow, the cats that never left his room, had managed to steal his mother's brassiere.

Hinata unfortunately had looked up at that moment. She raised an eyebrow and he saw a dark look enter her eyes.

"It's my mother's," he muttered as he stuffed it into the laundry bag.

"Is it really?" She carefully placed the kittens down then stood. "How am I supposed to believe that? Do you have proof?"

"You want me to go and get my mother and show her that very personal article of clothing? Are you trying to make me die from embarrassment?"

She raised her hand to her mouth and turned away from him. Her shoulders started shaking and he winced, knowing he was the reason for her pain.

"Hinata," he said softly, going over to her and wrapping his arms around her waist. "I'm sorry… You are laughing," he said in exasperation.

"Of course, you should have seen your face when you thought I thought that brassiere might belong to one of your female companions. It was priceless," she giggled.

"I shall now have to punish you," he whispered in her ear as he started nibbling on it causing her to shriek with laughter.

...

I was driving along today to the store and saw the funniest thing: a van with the letters AMBU painted on the side. Granted, I do believe it was an ambulance but still, I cracked up. Yep, I'm just that type of person...