Fifth day of Fall
"Uh, wait, I can handle this... Where do you want it...?" A cold chill was on its way as Father Winter was one his annual routine. The leaves of trees grew red, orange, yellow, and brown ones fell to the ground, lifeless; the trees were even preparing for the nasty approaching winter. Warm thick wool coats became expensive, while summer dresses and apparel fell so cheap and the production of them stopped. It had been only four days since the first day of fall, and Oni avoided Hanz as much as possible. However, even when they ran into each, Hanz held his tongue, dipped his head, and continued on.
"Thank you... My back just can't handle all the merchandise..." An old man chortled while Oni took hold of several boxes, not having any trouble at all. "I just need them stacked over here... Thanks, my boy."
"Anytime," Oni smiled, waved, and exited the store. Lately, he tried taking Kari's advice for once, and worked to get on good terms with the people of Clock Town. "I'm surprised people that old still work... When their bodies grow so frail... What's the point? Too bad they didn't have my aging rate, heh," He smirked, content at the thought of no wrinkles.
"You live far too many lifetimes, I think," A light-hearted voice came from his side, and Oni turned to face Kari, who wore a green peasant dress along with a brown scarf. "Achooo! You're lucky you can't feel the cold..."
"Uh... Correction..." Oni scratched his ear. "The gods granted me that ability when they gave me Link's vessel. It's just that I don't mind the cold, it's kinda refreshin' I think."
"R-Refreshing...?" She gazed at him with a dumbstruck look, yet her brow was raised. "You need to get your head looked at..."
"Kari, if you're that cold, I can always cuddle up with you," His well-known smile appeared, but as he went to hug her, her fist met his face. "Ow wow wow... I was being nice..."
"And like your normal self; I wouldn't ever be cold enough to do that with you..."
"??" Oni cocked his head. "You're no fun... Of all the charming girls in this village, how the heck did I get stuck with you?" He shrugged, but it was a comment just to poke fun. Almost knowing her response, he beat her to it: "Then you shouldn't have given me a black rose... Izzat right?"
"... That's too weird... Don't do that, someone like you shouldn't know me so well..." Kari began walking towards the market. "Anyway, I came to get you to ask you, can you help me carry groceries home? We're almost out..."
"Heck, I could carry the groceries, you, and the market home if I wanted," Oni beamed, cockiness in every word. "Sure, I s'pose I can help... Since I'm another mouth to feed, eh? Hey, if you're that cold, just write me a list and I'll get the stuff while you head home."
"What? No way, you'd get everything wrong."
"Nani? I was trying to be considerate too!" He laughed, at ease with her answer. "That's Kari for ya, the girl lacking a women's kindness..."
"W-Well...! I am only sixteen, Mr. A-thousand-and-three!!"'
"Oi! Oi! Don't yell that so loudly, you make me feel like I'm older then ea-"
"You probably are...!" She grinned, stopping at the vegetable stall. "Ok... We need a few radishes... some tomatoes... Two cucumbers... And an onion here. We still need a lot of grains though... And fresh meat, grandma Beck is quite the carnivore..."
"Radish... tomato... onion... Oh, I definitely see a resemblance of something to this," He held up the cucumber, making Kari's jaw drop. Then, as soon as she gained a reality check, a deep red wave splashed across her face and she snatched the innocent vegetable from his hand. "P-Pervert! It a simple cucumber!!" She quickly turned to the clerk and paid for the stuff. While the clerk added everything up, Oni came up with an "pleasing" comeback:
"If you wanted that so bad, you should've asked... I'd give you something ten times bigger."
"..." She froze, just as she gave the clerk her money. "I DID NOT WANT TO KNOW THAT YOU IDIOT!!" KERSHERK! Snatching the cucumber, she beat him upside the head making it crack in half before throwing it back in the basket she carried. "Honestly! I mean! Of all things...! ... You're bad for my blood pressure..." She sighed, regaining her composure before continuing onto the next stand.
"Blood pressure? Come on, I would call it anger management more likely." Oni observed as she selected a good loaf of bread, a sack of rice, and a slab of tofu. "Besides, may I jog your memory once again; you're so charming when you're angry, I take pleasure in doing this."
"I know," She grinded her teeth at the words, yet her actions brought a smile upon his face as he began whistling a tune. "Eh..." Quiet, she didn't complain a bit that the basket was growing too heavy for her... but it was actually quite easy to notice. As she placed another thing in the basket without a word, Oni ran a hand through his hair as he grabbed it from her arm.
"Idiot, if it's getting too heavy for you, you should let others handle it."
"I-It wasn't t-that heavy...!" She defended, not wanting to reveal weakness but he pat her on the head and continued walking.
"Sure, Kari, sure, whatever you say," He smirked. "Oi, what kind of meat are we getting? They have beef, pork, and lamb..."
"Huh?" Kari examined the merchandise. "We're getting beef; we can't afford pork and lamb at this time... During the cold seasons, we have to learn to ration what we have. Otherwise, we'd run out of food and money too fast." As she explained, he listened intently, sort of intrigued by the living ways.
"I can buy my own food, if that helps any, I mean, I CAN make money appear out of thin air..."
"Eh? N-No! It's ok," She waved her hands back and forth. "Grandma Beck would beat me senselessly if I let you do that! Since you're our guest, and have done many things for us, it's only natural we return hospitality... It's a thing friends do for each other."
"..." He blinked twice, "Alright!" A wide spread grin lashed out on his face. "Beef it is!" While Kari paid the clerk, Oni grabbed a bag labeled beef and threw it over his shoulder. "Hey, Kari, is this one ok?"
"Sure," She dipped her head. "I'm surprised you knew which one it was, I didn't think you could even read."
"What!? No way!" He stuck out his tongue childishly. "Mom and Majora taught me to read very well, thank you very much! I often tried to skip out of learning lessons, but Majora would always catch me with magic... I wasn't very skillful back then."
"Ha, and you are now?" The comment was playful as they now examined all they had collected. "I think we're done... Is it heavy? I can take some back."
"Heavy? You try swinging around a ten foot sword made of strong minerals, you get pretty buff."
"Ahhhh so that makes you a meathead, I get it now...!" She beamed, and they began heading home. "Hey, Oni..."
"Hm? What?"
"Uh... n-nothing, never mind..." She dropped the conversation, clasping her hands together behind her back.
"Huh? No, what'd you mean?" They were entering the forest trail that led to her home. However, Kari said the same thing:
"Never mind, it's nothing, honest."
"..." He set down the groceries silently, and then, like an assassin, he leapt on her back, causing the two to fall to the ground with a thud.
"O-Ow! What the h3ll was that for!?"
"Tell me," He rested his weight on her, holding her down. "Cuz I'm not getting up until you tell me."
"What!? You idiot! It's not important! Now, if we don't head home the meat will-"
"I'mmmm nnoooottt mooovvvinggg..." He smiled. "If it's not that important, you should just say it, because it had no value anyway."
"But what's the point of saying something that has no value...!!"
"..." He remained in that position. "If you don't say it, I'll make you say it my way."
"... Huh, fine..." She sighed. "But can you get off me? You're crushing my back with your fat..."
"Fat? Excuse me, but what part of this is fat?" He moved off her, and flexed.
"All of it..." She exercised her shoulders. "I was just going to say thanks for helping me carry everything, geez... See? Not important," She snatched up a few of the groceries and began walking again.
"... Hehe, you're welcome, Kari!" He hugged her from behind.
"You know, normally hugs from people are OK. But when they're hugs from you, you never know what you'll end up doing so... LEMME GO ALREADY!"
"I'm going to do anything..." he snuggled closer, resting his head on her neck. "You're so warm... I like this."
"... And I draw the line, let go!" She pulled away. I-Idiotic p-pervert... "Glad you made a discovery now pick up the rest of the stuff and let's go HOME already!! Sheesh!!" She stomped away, while a grin appeared on his face.
"You're so determined to get home! Do you want us to have a nice afternoon?" His smile appeared, she raised a fist to hit him, but as he flinched, she lowered it.
"You're going to be the end of me..."
(Somewhere Else)
"So carefree..." A dark voice chuckled at the crystal mirror's image. "Completely unaware of what's going on... To my intent, I see he will no be no harm to my plans... But... his abilities enhance while protecting that girl... It might be better to... Kentos! Come!" From the shadows, a man emerged clothed with a black cloak, yellow eyes watching his leader intently.
"Yes, my lord?"
"That girl... Bring her to me," Sitting on the stalagmite throne, the ominous figure took a sip of rich red wine. "I believe I can have use for her, to stop this Deity figure from messing up things."
"Yes, my lord..."
"Oh, and Kentos?"
"Yes, my lord?"
"Be a dear and fetch me a prisoner, I feel like chopping someone's head off..." A sickening crack of knuckles came from the figure's hands.
"As you wish..." Kentos chuckled before walking off. "Anything you wish my lord..."
Author Notes: Didja enjoy the chapter? Yes... I made it slightly perverted with the cucumber... but face it! You're reading True Self, sequel to God's Love! Oni's back! Expect it!
Oni- Heh heh, that cucumber comeback was pretty good, if I do say so myself... (Folds arms, smirks, satisfied)
Majora- Are you sure you killed off the right person?
Author- You know, I've been asking myself the same thing for the last few chapters. However, you gotta admit his stupidity is funny.
Majora- ... Yes... (Smiles) Like the time we put him in a giant hamster wheel...
Author- Ahahaha! Yeah! He ran and ran and ran, he really wanted that popsicle!
Kari- Good times... (Laughs)
Oni-That was NOT funny! I... (Sniffle) I was never able to get the Popsicle... It kept running away...
Author- Uh-huh... (Raises brow) Well, see you guys, I'm off to dunkin donuts...
Oni- What!? TAKE ME WITH YOU! (Tries to glomp but gets hit in the face)
Author- nope, not happening. Majora, Kari, what do you guys want?
Kari- Crème filled.
Majora- Chocolate glaze and... if the star bucks ifs open, get me some coffee.
Author- What? Ugh! Fine! You're paying me back... (Start away)
Oni- What about m-
Author- You want a whole freakin' box of munchkin donut holes and two jelly filled donut alongside a chocolate glaze, and three sprinkled plain donuts... Did I get it?
Oni- Yes! Thank-you Senorita Author Lady! (Tries to glomp again but gets hit in the face again)
Author- Seriously, why do you even try anymore?
...
Rock- Hey... What about me? (All alone)