Author Note: Just a quick author note - I'm hoping to get one more chapter of this up before I leave on Tuesday, it'll be a sort of mid-season finale, I suppose. Here's the next chapter...

Maura slipped off her shoes and sat down on the couch. Her heart swelled and ached with every passing second. She couldn't quite find the words to describe how she felt, nor did she really want to. A few minutes with Luke was enough, for now, until she could request her lawyer to act.

"Perhaps we could order some drinks from the bar," she said, leaning against the couch. "Or we could go down."

"Yeah," Jane said, pacing across the room, Then back again.

Her eyebrows tightened. "What's wrong? I thought you'd be happy?"

"What's there to be happy about?" Jane asked, stopping across the room. She turned, her hands tucked into the pockets of her slacks.

"I got to see Luke again." Maura stood and walked over. She slipped her hands through the gaps between Jane's arms and her body and pulled her into a tight embrace. At first, Jane didn't move. After a moment, she rested a hand across Maura's back. "It's because of you. I don't think I'd have been brave enough to do it without you here."

"Maybe."

Leaning back, Maura stared into her eyes, cautiously aware of the lack of words Jane had spoken since they'd returned to the room. The more she thought about it, the more she realised Jane didn't say a word the whole walk back.

"We need to celebrate," she said, grinning.

Untangling herself from Maura's arms, Jane walked over to the window and stared out across the city. "Celebrate what?"

"Anything," Maura said. "Everything? I'm finally going to fight for Luke, and I couldn't have done it without your support."

Jane turned around. She sighed. "Has he always spoken to you that way?"

"Who?"

"Who?" Jane shook her head. "Gregory. Who else?"

"Which way?"

"Like you're incapable of being a mother."

"I've made a lot of mistakes," Maura said. "He's trying to protect Luke."

"He's an abusive ass."

Taken aback, Maura stared at Jane, her eyebrows pulled together. Words caught in her throat. She didn't quite know how to respond to that. "Gregory has never hurt Luke."

"I'm not talking about Luke, but he's not exactly dad of the year."

"Me?" Maura asked, frowning.

"Yes, you."

"He's never hurt me, either," she said, sitting back down. "He's a good man, and a good father. He's not a violent man."

"I'm not talking about violence. Why are you defending him?"

"Why do you insist on making him out to be the bad guy?"

"Were you in the same room as us?" Jane shook her head vehemently and turned away. "I can't believe you can't see it."

"Can't see what?"

"He questioned your ability to be a mother every time he spoke."

"Like I already explained, he's trying to protect..."

"...Luke, I know." Jane rolled her eyes. "But that's bullshit. You can protect your kid and not talk shit to your kid's mother."

"Jane, I think you misunderstood."

"Ahh!" Jane balled her fists up in front of her and slammed them down against her thighs, groaning loudly. She stepped forward, her voice raised. "His faith in you as a person is zero. I don't care whether he's trying to protect Luke, he talks to you like you're something he stepped in. He's basing his opinion of you on something that happened over a decade ago, and from the way he spoke to you tonight I wonder if it ever went the way you said it did."

Retreating against the comfort of the couch, Maura folded her arms across her chest. "Please stop shouting."

"No!" Jane said, her voice only grew louder. "Not until you acknowledge that the way he spoke to you wasn't acceptable."

"I'll admit he was tough, but it's nothing I don't deserve."

"That's debatable," Jane said. She stared out the window, the night sky shrouded in a mix of city lights and a scatter of stars barely visible behind the cloud. "When you were in with Luke he called you unstable, he called you different."

"I am different, and it's caused problems."

"You're not different," Jane said, slower, quieter. She stalked across the room and perched beside Maura. Gripping Maura's hand, she moved her fingers across it. "You struggle sometimes with understanding social cues, you don't always get phrases, that doesn't make you a bad mother, it makes you human. Nobody's the same."

"You weren't there, Jane. You didn't see how difficult it became."

"Was it difficult because you found it hard, or was it difficult because he made you think you were worthless?"

"What are you implying?"

"If he's always spoken to you the way he spoke to you tonight, is it any wonder you felt like you weren't good enough for Luke?"

"That makes no..." Maura's voice drifted off. She replayed the conversation they'd had that evening, and the way it very quickly pulled her back into a place she didn't imagine she'd ever go again. Despite the conversation with Luke, she still doubted herself. She still felt, so deeply inside, her inadequacies. It was only then, when she sat with the feelings for a moment, that she realised how deeply those feelings ran. "I don't, know."

Edging closer, Jane cupped cheeks. "You are the most amazing person I've ever known. I've watched you grow from the person you used to be when we first met into this confident, independent woman. It took one conversation with him for her to disappear."

"I," Maura tried to speak but the words caught in her throat like too much chilli on pasta. She gasped, shaking her head. "It can't be. He, he's a good father. I don't, I can't remember."

"You're better than what he claims you are. You're smarter, and happier, and better for Luke than he thinks. Please don't let him destroy that."

She stood and walked into the bathroom. She locked the door and stared at her reflection. For as long as she could remember, her memories of Luke's early years were shrouded with the loss of custody. What she'd forgotten, or more, what she hadn't allowed herself to remember, was how low her confidence had become.

The last two weeks she'd felt uplifted by Jane's support, and her words only sought to further build her confidence. She'd said more positive things to her that night than she could ever remember from Gregory.

The harder she tried to remember her marriage, the harder it became to ignore the intense feeling of worthlessness that encompassed her. The face staring back at her was not the face she'd looked at every day a decade ago. That face wondered if she'd ever feel normal enough to give Luke what he needed.

That face repeated the questions asked of her by the one person who was supposed to support her.

She covered her face with her hands. A wave of nausea overwhelmed her until she had no choice but to rush to the toilet bowl. She knelt on the floor, her heart raced every time her stomach contents rematerialised. When all that was left was the lining of her stomach, she heaved a couple of times then returned to the sink.

Scooping water up in her hands, she drank, thirstily refilling her stomach with the only option available to her.

"Maura?" Jane tapped on the door.

She reached for a towel and unlocked the door. Her cheeks were red. Jane held her arms out to her and she crumbled into them.

x

"We need to stop doing this," Jane said, lifting her foot along the edge of Maura's leg. She clutched her round the shoulders, peppered kisses along her neck. "You know I can't resist you."

Maura scraped her nails up Jane's thigh. "Why would we need to stop?"

"This isn't the answer to anything."

"It doesn't need to be."

"I guess not." Resting her cheek against Maura's, she sighed. "I don't want to not communicate. For this to be the only way to fix a problem."

"That's my fault."

"No, it started with me."

"Long before we got together," Maura said. "Since, you've done nothing but be everything I asked you to be. I'm the one who failed."

"It's not failure." She draped her arm across Maura's stomach. "You were in an abusive relationship, that's not your fault."

"You weren't there. You don't know what it was like."

"Don't tell me you're defending him, again."

"I'm not." Maura turned over, her body pressed comfortably against Jane's, like yin and yang. Together, yet separate. "Until I can piece together what I remember, I refuse to judge him on something I don't fully understand."

"I guess I can't expect anything else," Jane said. "You need to get there on your own."

"When we are intimate, I feel closer to you, and right now, that's what I need, is that okay?"

"I just don't want you to be hiding behind sex."

"I'm not. That's not what this is." Maura ran her palm across Jane's cheek. "Is that what you think I'm doing? Using you?"

"You know me," Jane said. "I love sex with you. I'd never think you were using me. I'm worried."

"You don't need to be."

"I think I do."

"Why?"

"Gregory." Jane tucked her ankle across Maura's and brushed her lips across her forehead. "I don't know what your relationship was like. But what I've seen you two together; it scares me, Maura. It scares me that you can break so easily when he's in front of you."

"I didn't break," Maura said, sitting up. "I stood up to him."

"After I stood up first."

She moved back across the bed. The space between them grew. Jane wrapped the bed sheets around her chest and stared at Maura, at her eyes darting about, confusion etched across her face.

"I'm not saying that to hurt you." She reached for Maura's hand, but she tugged it back, moving towards the end of the bed. "It's what happened. You found strength because I was there beside you."

"You make me sound weak."

"Maura," Jane said, leaning forward. She slipped off the end of the bed and stood up. "Come on, don't be like that."

"How am I supposed to be?" she asked. "You've just told me I'm weak, that I can't be strong unless you're there. Do you know how condescending that is?"

"Come on, Maura." Jane climbed off the bed and reached for her shirt. Wrapping it around her shoulders, she fastened a couple of button. "Don't be like that."

"Like what? Upset? Angry?"

"No."

"I'm sorry Jane, but that's how I'm feeling right now. You've hurt me."

"Fine." She buttoned the rest of the shirt and reached for her panties.

Maura sat in silence. Every action Jane made, she glanced over, watching her stood naked beside the bed. Her heart ached. Maura looked so lost, and yet, she couldn't do or say anything to make her feel better. She zipped up her slacks.

"Where are you going?" Maura asked, when she headed toward the door.

"I'm leaving."

"Why?" Maura stepped toward her, her hand outstretched.

When it collided with Jane's arm, she pulled back. "Don't."

"I don't want you to go."

"You don't get to make that decision."

She shook her head. "I can't believe you. I'm the one who has reason to be angry and upset and once again you're making this about you."

"Once again? I'm not making anything about me." She stared into Maura's eyes, at the hurt flash across her orbs. "You've pushed and pushed me away. I can't do it anymore."

"You're leaving me?"

Jane sighed, and shrugged. "I'm leaving the hotel. I don't know what the fuck I'm going to do after that. But I'm sick of being here for you, supporting you, only to have you throw it back in my face again."

She pulled open the door and marched across the suite. Maura followed close behind. "You can't."

"I can, and I am."

"Jane, don't," Maura said.

She unlocked the front door and turned back. The devastation on Maura's face should have been enough. It forced a battle of wills to play out in her heart. She didn't want to walk away when Maura needed her so much. But her heart was aching too much. She couldn't do it anymore. She needed a break.

"I'm sorry," she said, closing the door behind her.

x

"Where have you been?" Kent asked, standing in the doorway of Maura's office.

"I told you, I couldn't come in yesterday."

He strode across the room with his hands in his pockets. "You look healthy enough, you certainly don't look like you were on death's door yesterday."

"I didn't say that I was."

Slouching into the chair opposite her desk, Kent sighed. "Where's the kid?"

"He's returned to his family."

"I thought you were his family."

A couple of tears lingered on the edge of her eyelids. She stared down at the case file on her desk, a welcomed distraction from everything going through her mind. When she looked back up, her resolve had returned.

"How did you know?"

"The DNA test you allowed him to do."

"Oh."

"It's more than that," he said. "He looks like you. There had to be some familial link. Though I didn't expect him to be your child."

Maura pursed her lips and glared at him. "Why did you open confidential DNA results?"

"We received several results, someone had to check them. I opened it by mistake."

"What were the other results?"

"The Mayor's son had been sleeping with his sister." He clasped his hands across his stomach. "We had quite the eventful day yesterday."

"I'm sorry I missed it."

Kent stood up. "You don't need to apologise to me. The Mayor's office may appreciate an update, that's if you'd like to reveal such sensitive information to them."

"Thank you, Kent. I'll deal with it."

x

The bullpen buzzed with people; a hive of activity on an otherwise quiet morning. Jane sat down at her desk, barely awake, barely functioning after a night of tossing and turning. After she arrived at her apartment she'd drunk too much beer and stared too long at the television. By the time she attempted to sleep, it passed her by until the early hours of the morning.

"Where the hell have you been?" Korsak asked, his hands on his hips. "Did you forget we have a case to solve? I've already got the Mayor's office putting pressure on the department, I can't have my detectives flaking out on me to go deal with whatever it is they think is more important than the goddamn Mayor's goddamn son."

Elbow on the table, she stared up at him. Her eyelids felt heavy and her heart ached. "Feel better?"

"Yes, actually," he said, perching on the edge of her desk. "I mean it, Jane, I can't have you disappearing like that. Not now. We're like goldfish in a pond, with a very powerful kitty waiting for the moment when they can sweep in and eat us."

She raised an eyebrow. "I'm a goldfish?"

"If you don't start talking to me, instead of turning up looking like you haven't slept a wink, then yeah. I'm gonna kick your ass down to beat for a week. See how you like that."

"I know you don't mean that," she said, rubbing her eyes. "Where are we at with the case?"

"You know the problem with this?" he asked, waving his fingers between them.

"Problem with what?"

"You and me." She shrugged. "You stopped treating me like your boss and started treating me like a friend."

Jane sighed. "I haven't slept all night, you're gonna have to spell it out for me."

"I thought I was." He frowned. "When I scold you for being absent, I expect you to take it seriously, not treat it like I'm just playing games."

"I do treat it seriously, Vince," she said. "I'm just joking, and tired. So tired."

"What's got you so tired?"

"It's complicated, but Maura and I got into a fight."

"Women," he said, laughing. Jane stared at him. "Sorry, I know you're a woman too, but you're not like other women."

"Really?" she asked, sitting back. "What exactly do other women do that I don't?"

"Paint their nails and wear dresses, for one."

"I'm gonna pretend this conversation is part of some terrible dream," she said, folding her arms and resting her forehead against them.

"Don't fall asleep."

"Why not?"

"You've got work to do." He stood. "Someone's gotta ask the Mayor why his son had a physical relationship with a sister we knew nothing about."

x

Jane stared at the Mayor, waiting for his reaction to the revelation. She half expected him to tell her where to go, or inform her that she'd been mistaken. Instead, he pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed.

"Nobody knew."

"Nobody knew what, Mayor?" Frankie sat on one seat, Jane beside him.

"Nobody knew that I had a relationship which resulted in a child shortly after my son was born."

"You cheated on your wife," Jane said, crossing her arms. She turned to Frankie. "Sounds about right."

He stood up, his palms pressed firmly against the desk. The vein in his head pulsed. "You have no understanding of the situation, Detective. I deplore the present circumstances, and ask that you refrain from judgement."

"Okay." She leaned back. "We've got all day."

"I, however, do not," he said. "I have meetings. All you need to know is what I've told you. A child was conceived. The child's mother was financially remunerated and the girl was given the best in life."

"You paid her off?"

"No, Detective, I ensured the girl had everything she deserved."

"Except a father," Frankie said.

"She had a step-father."

"That makes it okay?" Jane asked.

"Of course not." Mayor Smithson glanced at the desk, then back up to Frankie, and Jane. "I don't expect you to understand. What happened between Albie and the girl happened without the knowledge of myself, or her mother."

Jane smiled, her eyebrows raised. "Really?"

"What are you implying, Detective Rizzoli?"

"She's not implying anything," Frankie said, standing up. He gripped Jane's arm, and spoke in a hushed voice. "Stop what you're doing before you destroy this case."

"He's lying," she said.

"Then we'll find proof, don't push him."

"Yeah, whatever," she said, shrugging his hand away and rushing toward the door. Frankie followed at a distance. "Don't leave town, Mayor."

"Wouldn't dream of doing."