Chapter 11 – The First Kiss

It was hard for Emily to concentrate the next day. So much had happened during her weekend, her mind and above all her heart hadn't had enough time to process it all. She asked herself more than just once why JJ had been crying last night, they hadn't really had a chance to talk before school, and Jen had been awfully quiet during breakfast. Her aunt Roxanne and Laura had driven off early in the morning, much to Emily's relieve. Erick had announced that he intended to stay a couple more days, having to take care of some "important business", and Emily couldn't be more thrilled to have him around a little longer. She looked to her right at Derek, but he was staring stubbornly at Ms. Henley as she introduced a new topic to the class. Emily only listened with half an ear and gave up on trying to get Derek's attention. Either he was unusually interested in what Ms. Henley was saying, or he didn't want to talk to her. She scribbled incoherent words in her notebook and prayed that the school day would be over soon, so she could spent some more time with Erick, and maybe JJ too. The bell rang and everyone but Emily went into recess. Derek had been the first one to storm out, before she even had a chance to talk to him. Great. With him gone, she had no one to talk to during school hours. Maybe she could ask Ms. Henley if she could stay in the classroom reading or working on her history paper.

"Excuse me, Ms. Henley, I was wondering..."

Ms. Henley stopped grading her student's papers and looked at Emily through her horn-rimmed glasses.

"Yes, dear?"

Emily felt uneasy as she looked at her teacher's knowing eyes, and decided it was better to leave. "I just wanted to... never mind, I'm sorry I bothered you," she said, and picked up her backpack.

"Emily, wait. Actually, I wanted to talk to you too."

Emily paused her movements; and a thin frown appeared on her forehead. She had always been on time and she never failed to do her assignments. What could Ms. Henley possibly want to talk to her about?

"Yes?" she asked nervously, chewing on her bottom lip.

"As you might know, I'm in charge of the Drama Club, and I wanted to invite you to come and see us rehearse sometime. My gut tells me you would enjoy it."

"Oh... I don't know," Emily said sheepishly. "I've never done such a thing before. Acting, I mean."

"That's OK, there's no pressure. I would be honored if you came and simply watched. You're one of the best students I ever had the pleasure to teach."

"Well... thank you, Ms. Henley," Emily said, taken aback by the honesty in her words. "I will think about it."

"Great. We meet every Friday from 6 to 8 pm in the assembly hall. You can show up whenever you like, it would be great to have you there."

Emily smiled at her teacher, and noticed for the first time how pretty she was behind those old fashioned glasses and her not so youthful dress style that seemed better fitted for a woman twenty years older. Her light brown hair fell onto her shoulders in soft waves and her facial features were very feminine; she had full lips and her green eyes with brown sprinkles radiated with wisdom. Emily realized all of the sudden that she liked Ms. Henley very much.

"I will be there," she promised, earning a bright smile from her teacher.

Finally, the end of her last period arrived. Emily had already packed her bag, she was prepared if Derek tried to avoid her again.

"Derek, wait! Derek!" she called after him. Man, he was fast. Emily hurried after him, and he finally stopped in the hallway and faced her, not looking too friendly.

"What do you want?" His bitter tone was like a slap in the face, and Emily gasped for air.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Morgan? Yesterday, you seemed very eager to talk to me, and now you act like this? What have I ever done to you?"

Derek laughed. It was an ugly, cheerless laughter that mocked her.

"Well if you don't know… Look Emily, I have to get home okay?" he replied harshly. "Some of us have to work for a living."

It was as if someone had just emptied a bucket of icy water above her head. "Why are you so mad at me?" she asked, her sight turning blurry as her eyes became wet.

"I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at this whole situation. First you start to cry your eyes out while we... and nobody tells me what I did wrong. Then I run into you at the movies, but again, I get no explanation whatsoever..."

"Derek please, don't be like this," Emily begged him. "I just want things to be normal again. I can't explain now, but eventually I will."

"Well, I bet that guy must be very special, you didn't look so sad yesterday when you were with him," Derek spat, revealing the source of his discontentment.

"What guy? What do you mean?"

"Don't play dumb, the six feet two inches tall guy I saw you with after I left."

"Is that what this is about? Are you jealous of Erick?" If she wasn't so hurt, Emily would have laughed. This was absurd…

"Jealous? I just don't get why you would go out with a guy like that. He's got some nerves! How old is he, twenty-five, twenty-six? Damn it Emily, he looks like he could be twenty-eight. He is way too old for you!"

"Calm down, people are staring at us!" Emily hissed and signalized him to speak quietly with her hands.

Indeed, a small crowd of students had gathered around them, leering curiously at the scene in front of them.

"I won't calm down! That guy's no good, he will hurt you sooner or later!"

"And you won't..."

"Well, no! Not intentionally! But guys his age..."

"Not that it's any of your business, but Erick is my cousin!" Emily shouted, not caring anymore if they had spectators or not.

"Wait, your what?"

"He is my cousin, and he's twenty-four. And I assure you, he has no intentions of getting into my pants!" Emily whispered furiously, and dragged Derek away from the gazers.

"Oh... your cousin? I'm sorry, Em. I didn't..."

"Well, now you know. And stop acting like I belong to you, I can go out with whoever I please! It's none of your damn business!" she yelled, furious now.

"Em, I'm sorry. It's just that... we didn't really talk after Jennifer's birthday...I feel horrible for what I did, and the fact that you won't talk about it just makes it worse. Please talk to me Emily. Please tell me how to make it all better..."

Emily heard the desperation in Derek's voice, and part of her anger evaporated. What if she just spilled all out, right here, right now? She was so damn tired of keeping secrets…

"I told you already, it's nothing you did," she told Derek, utterly defeated. She couldn't tell him, not just yet.

"Then what is it?"

"I -I can't tell you. I really can't."

"You can't or you won't?"

"Derek please, let it go," she said tearfully.

"Em I need to know, this whole thing is driving me crazy," he implored, but Emily was already sobbing, and Derek felt the urge to smack himself for being so stupid. He had made her cry twice in three days, how great! Emily looked small and frail and had wrapped her arms tightly around herself in a protective manner.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry baby, I shouldn't have pushed you," he apologized sorrowfully.

"Please leave me alone," she whimpered and hid her face behind her hands.

"Em, you're a mess. I'm not going anywhere."

Emily allowed Derek to put his arms around her and sobbed against his shoulder, imagining JJ was holding her. This, instead of calming her down, made her cry even harder.

Friday, 6pm

"Hi Emily, welcome. We were just starting," Ms. Henley said when Emily arrived.

"Hi," Emily replied a little reserved and looked around. She didn't know anyone here besides Ms. Henley. She sat down in one of the front seats of the hall and watched as the play evolved on stage. Oddly enough, it was a play Emily didn't know, in spite the vast amount of time she spent reading. When a boy and a girl who appeared to be the main protagonists kissed each other, she was taken five years back in time, into the living room of her old house.

Five years ago, Emily's living room

"Emily, this feels odd. Are you sure we're doing it right?" the blonde girl asked when their lips separated and both girls gasped for air.

"I'm pretty sure, I saw it on TV. And I did it once, with Paul."

Emily and Jennifer were sitting on a black leather couch with their legs intertwined, and their mouths so close they could feel each other's breath against their skin.

"And what do we do now?" Jennifer asked, doubtful as to whether she wanted to continue playing this "game".

"Well we have to open our mouths. That's how it's done. Do you want to try it?"

"Okay..."

Their lips met again, and when they parted, their tongues touched for a fleeting moment. Emily thought it felt wonderful, but most of all it also felt a little strange, and moistly, and warm. Her sight had become blurry, and she had a very nice fuzzy feeling in her stomach. She had never kissed someone like that before, not even Paul, and she had enjoyed every bit of it. But she wouldn't admit that to her best friend.

"This feels too weird, let's stop," Jen said and separated her lips from Emily's yet again. "I bet we're not doing it right."

"Have you kissed someone before?" Emily asked.

"No."

"Well, maybe that's why it feels weird. Besides, you have to do it with a boy."

"Yeah, I suppose you're right. Do you think it feels good? You know, with a boy?"

"I guess. Why else would anyone do it if it wasn't good?"

"I don't know, maybe because they think they have to?"

"Nobody has to do it, Jennifer, people kiss because they're in love."

"We're not in love, and we kissed."

"We were just practicing for our real kiss with a boy. That's completely different."

"If you say so..."

The rehearsal was over and though Emily had missed the last scene due to her daydreaming, she had liked it very much. She waited until the students had left, and went over to Ms. Henley to congratulate her.

"Ms. Henley, that was awesome!"

"Thank you Emily. You really think so?"

"Yes, the scenery was beautiful, and the acting was great. It must have cost you a lot of effort to put it all together like that."

"It's nice someone finally appreciates my work," Ms. Henley joked. "Anyways, we will perform this play in two weeks, and I already have an idea for a new one. You are welcome to join us anytime, there's a list outside my office for students who want to try out for a role."

"You mean I would have to…s-speak in front of people?"

Ms. Henley laughed cheerfully. "Well of course dear, unless I happen to choose a silent play. But I very much doubt that will be the case."

"Well... I guess trying doesn't hurt... What play is it?"

"Oh I'm not a hundred percent sure yet, I will think about it over the weekend."

"Alright. See you, Ms. Henley."

"Bye, Emily. I'm really glad you came."

Jennifer's house, two days after her birthday

JJ was laying on her bed waiting for fatigue to overcome her. Her parents were back from their short trip, and they had brought some presents along with them, but she hadn't felt any joy, neither for her parents return, nor for the presents. Not even her mother's chocolate cake with orange slices on top had managed to cheer her up. It was as delicious as always, but for some reason she could only eat a single piece.

"What's wrong, darling?" her mother had asked, while her father had silently looked at her with his bright blue eyes.

"Nothing mom, I'm just tired."

"Well honey, better go to sleep then," her dad had suggested, kissing her affectionately on her forehead.

"Good night, pumpkin."

"Good night, daddy. Good night mom."

"Sleep well, my little one."

But JJ couldn't sleep. Her mind was working like a machine that lacked a stop button and rattled along without any direction or purpose. She thought about a lot of things, but mostly, she thought about Emily. What would happen now that her best childhood friend was back? She already felt the same intimacy around her they had shared when they were kids, even though Emily had only been back in her life for a couple of days. Of course, she had other girlfriends, but with them it wasn't the same. If they were to move miles away, she would most certainly forget them sooner or later. JJ closed her eyes. Her hands found their way under the blanket and into the pants of her pajamas. She traced her fingertips over the fabric of her cotton panties, gradually applying more and more pressure, until a well-known dampness soaked through the thin material, smearing on her fingers. Her sweaty hand wandered inside her undies, creating a vibrant sensation that crept from her core into her whole body as she rubbed against her lips and button. Images floated through her mind; she saw Ian and other boys she had liked when she was younger, the piano teacher she had had a crush on, the little boy that kissed her in kindergarten... and then she saw Emily. Emily talking to her, smiling at her, hugging her... both sleeping together like sisters... She opened her eyes, convinced that she would see Emily laying beside her, and quickly shut them again when she didn't. However, she saw her before her inner eye, laying at her side and watching her as she drove herself to climax. Jennifer let out a small cry of ecstasy as her muscles clenched around her fingers.