SG-7

Chapter: X

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ShifterBlack walks onto stage, with Hokuto Ulric right next to him. They both clear their throats.

ShifterBlack: Welcome, fans and friends, to the grand opening of the Cast Room!

A light above him comes on, revealing the word APPLAUSE.

Hokuto Ulric: This room is where Shifter, myself, and the cast of SG-7 will be making comments at the beginning of each chapter, sometimes leaving hints or clues as to how the story may progress.

ShifterBlack: With that out of the way, we have an announcement. Due to issues Hokuto and I are having in life, we've been hard pressed to churn out any kind of update. So we talked about it, and came to an agreement.

Hokuto Ulric: It is with a heavy heart that we tell you this. As of now, SG-7 is being put on Hiatus.

ShifterBlack: Hokuto is apparently being targeted by a PMSing Kami, and I myself am not too far behind. So for now, we will be working to straighten our lives out.

Kerra, Melissa, and the rest of the SG-7 cast walk onto the stage.

Kerra: Don't worry all. We'll be up and running again in no time.

Sonic: Nothing's going to tie down this hedgehog, so you can bet on this story continuing.

ShifterBlack: Yes. However, do not think we will just up and leave like that. I have a special little chapter to hold you over until then.

ShifterBlack and Hokuto Ulric: We now present to you our very first Blooper Reel!

Melissa: Neither ShifterBlack or Hokuto Ulric own the original cast of Stargate: SG-1 and Sonic the Hedgehog. ShifterBlack owns Myself, Sven Black, Krystal White, and Zane Sorroto. Hokuto Ulric owns Kerra Prower. Finally, Ember belongs to an author Shifter is too troubled to remember the name of.

ShifterBlack: Well excuse me for having horrible memory. Seizures will do that to you. Anyway, yeah. I'd appreciate if the author of Ember the Hedgehog lets me know who they are again. That way I can formally say he's yours.

Melissa: Alright! Enough technical crap. Roll it!

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Chapter 2: When Tails arrives at SGC

"Major Carter, status report" Said a bald human wearing an official looking white uniform. Lieutenant General George Hammond looked out the window that made up most of one of the walls in the room. In the room beyond the window was the Stargate in the gate room.

"Sir, the Stargate just suddenly started up and is currently dialing an address we don't know. It is on the fifth chevron, sir, and Harriman isn't here yet, so I'm running the gate at the moment" said a blond woman. Major Samantha "Sam" Carter.

"Shut the Iris" Hammond said, suddenly getting a very bad feeling.

"We've tried, sir, it's not responding" Said a man with grayish hair next to Sam. His name was Jonathon "Jack" O'Neill. "How many times does that make now, that we've not been able to shut the Iris because of some mystic voodoo shit?" he asked in a joking manner.

"Have any available man down there, ready to fire on my order" Hammond said.

"Sir!" they both said.

Five minutes later, when the Stargate was on the seventh, and final, chevron, about two dozen men and woman were aiming guns ranged from simple blasters to high power and velocity machine guns.

The gate opened, but everyone that's seen the gate open before immediately noticed something wrong.

Melissa was hanging behind the ring, tangled in the wires that she was supposed to use to swing through the ring.

"Get me down!"

The soldiers started cracking up as Kerra flew onto the set and started helping her twin, all the while snickering. "Attention whore" She commented, ducking under a tail swipe.

"Oh? And you're so much better?" Melissa snarled back. "It's bad enough I'm cramped to hell. I do NOT need your opinion!"

Kerra snickered again, managing to get Melissa down. "Aw…can my little twin not handle her monthly curse?" She started cracking up as she bolted, an enraged Kitsune hot on her heels.

"Alright people, coffee break!" ShifterBlack yells from his chair, rubbing his forehead. "Why did I agree to letting her on set while she was PMSing?"

"Partial insanity?" Hokuto Ulric remarked from his chair next to Shifter's.

"Partial nothing" Hammond said as he walked over. "Five bucks says she catches Kerra and ties her to the flag pole outside by the tails"

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Melissa: Hey! You said you burned that reel!

ShifterBlack: Yeah. I did burn that reel, but not the copies I made before burning it.

Kerra: Okay, let's move one before we have another fight.

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The gate opened, but everyone that's seen the gate open before immediately noticed something wrong.

For one, the gate never did the splash back, like it always does. And for two, the gate wasn't a rippling blue surface, it was pure white, and still as a board.

"What?" Hammond muttered, shocked to see this. "Record that address!" He yelled.

"On it!" Sam exclaimed, sketching the symbols.

Hammond grabbed the PA microphone. "Hold fire unless fired upon!" he shouted.

Everyone waited.

A dark shape could be seen becoming bigger and darker, as if getting closer, and then…

"God Dammit! Get back here!"

Everyone face planted the ground as Melissa dived through the ring, Kerra hot on her tails with an enraged look in her eyes.

"Nah nah, you can't catch me!" Melissa yelled, sticking her tongue out at Kerra.

"Stand still and take your punishment like a man!...er…Woman!"

Shifter groaned as he stood up. "Take five people!" he exclaimed, irate.

Sonic came onto the set and caught Melissa as she ran by. "What did you do this time?" He asked.

Melissa tried to give him the puppy eyes, but it failed horribly as he knocked her on the head. "Ow! Okay, I'm sorry! I switched her normal shampoo with the special stuff"

Sonic's eyes widened. "The special stuff? You mean you actually made her wash her hair with…ew!" he said, before turning and throwing Melissa at the approaching Kerra. "She has every right to wail on you now!"

"NOOOO!" She screamed.

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Sonic: I'm still waiting for the revenge she swore upon me.

Hokuto Ulric: Careful Sonic. Kitsune are ferocious when it comes to revenge and pranks.

Melissa: Oh, I already got that.

Sonic and Hokuto: Huh?

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Chapter 2: During the mission to locate the next Chaos Emerald.

"The energy's that way" Tails said, pointing into the trees. She frowned as she studied the radar more closely. "Jack, don't go looking for civilization yet. Stay here and stay ready to dial us home" she said.

Jack tilted his head in confusion. "Why?" he asked.

"The energy's moving towards us, fast" Tails said.

It only took Jack a second before he ran for the DHD, and started dialing. "Sam, Teal'c, Daniel, help them incase its hostile" he said.

Suddenly, a blur burst from the trees, and Tails saw a tint of blue.

Sadly, said blue blur was supposed to start running around them. Instead, his turn was too wide, and he smacked into the Stargate prop at more than breakneck speeds.

Melissa groaned and palmed her face as Sonic fell onto his back, moaning in pain. "Too wide AGAIN Sonic! Get it right already!" She yelled, stomping on his chest.

"Someone get Janet in here" Shifter called out, also irritated. He walked to Sonic as Kerra went to find their resident doctor. "I will take away your free Chilidog rights if you mess up this scene one more time. Are we clear?" he growled.

Sonic only groaned.

"Answer him!" Melissa kicked him in the balls for good measure, eliciting a pleasing high pitched scream of "Sir, yes sir!" before he blacked out.

Hokuto walked up and leaned over to whisper in Shifter's ear. "Is she still PMSing?" he asked.

"She shouldn't be. Last one was two weeks ago when we did the Chaos Control scene. Remember? It was when she tied Kerra to the top of the flag pole with her tails…in a triple knots"

Hokuto winced. "…Right…Forgot about that"

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Sonic: Quit laughing! That wasn't funny!

Everyone: Yes it was!

ShifterBlack: Anyways, since Sonic is so curious about what Melissa meant by her getting her revenge, I think we'll roll that one next.

Sonic: …Wait…Don't tell me… *Pales and tries to run away*

Melissa: *Grabs Sonic and tapes him to a chair* Ah ah ah. No chickening out on us now. *Grins evilly* Roll it!

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End of Chapter 4, in the No-Zone.

Zonic appeared through a portal in the No-Zone, rushing to a certain monitor in his Control Room. He examined it, before slapping a hand over his mouth and running off the set towards the bathroom.

"CUT!" Shifter yelled. "What the hell happened?"

Kerra walked onto the set and examined the monitor. Her cheeks took on a rosy hue and, with as straight a face as she could, turned and said "I think Shadow finally got that payback for when Sonic tripped him in their last race"

Hokuto quirked an eyebrow and walked onto the stage, followed by most of the cast. They looked at the monitor, and most of them did the same as Zonic, running off towards the various bathrooms on the set, the girls with red faces while the guys had green faces.

Kerra grunted in annoyance as she walked towards the camera. "Never knew Sonic could pole dance so well…" she muttered just before she shut the camera off with a blush.

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Sonic: I was drunk! It wasn't even supposed to happen!

Melissa: You weren't complaining when Amy and Blaze joined you, just as drunk.

Jack: Weren't we celebrating Blaze's birthday then?

Cream: Yep. Sonic got so drunk he decided one of his gifts to her would be a pole dance. She got equally drunk, along with Amy, and they joined him. It had everyone hollering in laughter, and Melissa managed to convince Shadow to record it so they could both get revenge.

Hokuto: Wow. Talk about your messed up birthday party.

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Chapter 9, after getting the call from Jack.

Five minutes later the two vixens were entering the kitchen. Melissa went to grab her keys.

"You won't be needing those." Kerra said.

"Then how do you propose we get to the Mountain?" Melissa asked hanging her keys back up.

"Like this." Kerra said as she grabbed Melissa's shoulder.

"KAOSU SHIHAI"

After a moment, Kerra realized just what she said and groaned. She turned around and slammed her head into the wall a few times, muttering things along the lines of "…need to stop reading Naruto Fan Fiction" and "Stupid!"

Melissa just started laughing, hard.

Hokuto sighed. "Cut" He said. "Kerra, you are officially grounded from your computer" he said, making Kerra's eyes widen comically, becoming white circles.

"What? No! You can't do that! I'll say it right this time, just don't take away my computer!" She was on her knees begging.

Hokuto stood firm. "I know you will. But that doesn't change the fact that you're grounded" He said.

Sonic tilted his head from his spot off the set. "Um…what exactly did she say?" he asked.

Shifter turned to him. "It was Japanese. Loosely, it translates into Chaos Control. She got her languages mixed up" he explained.

"Oh" Sonic said, before shrugging and walking towards the exit. "I'm gonna go get a sandwich"

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ShifterBlack: And that's a wrap! Thank you all for attending our very first Blooper Reel. If you have any ideas for our next one, you're more than welcome to give one to us through Reviews. However, we'll only take one from each person per Blooper Reel. This will keep our Reviews from getting swamped.

Hakuto Ulric: I can't believe you let Melissa on the set while she was having her monthly problem. That was just asking for trouble.