Please read Ch 1 for disclaimers…
Jane plucked at the nylon covering her thigh through her skirt and pulled it away from her skin.
Stupid things kept pinching her inner thigh.
Plus bare legs were chilly when you didn't have a coat with you.
Irritated, she smoothed her hand over the fabric and looked up the sidewalk for Maura, but she knew it was still too early. She crossed her arms over her chest and tried briskly rubbing for warmth and forced herself to relax with a long exhale out.
This time she had nobody to blame but herself.
Today had been all her idea. Sometimes you had to prove your point, especially when arguing wasn't getting you anywhere.
Yesterday at Davio's had been one long debate. She was positive that this entire social experiment of Maura's was flawed and by the end of today she'd have proof that she was right.
She'd love to see Maura try to argue her way around evidence she actually witnessed.
In Jane's estimation the first issue with yesterday's adventure was leaving her in her normal work clothes. They were functional but her suits were not even half as feminine as Maura's casual wear.
Frankly she liked what she looked like in her clothes, but she wasn't an idiot. People weren't going to look at her and associate her with this month's issue of Vogue.
Secondly, she'd been working with all the guys at the BPD too long. Maybe initially it had been unusual to be a woman working homicide but the days of having to prove she was as good as any of them were long over. They all knew she had what it took to be a detective, and by surviving Hoyt she had more than proven she had what it took to work homicide.
By now how they interacted with her had nothing to do with her job. She doubted they even thought about her as being a woman. It was more the fact that they had already accepted her a certain way and changing how she behaved was going to throw everyone off.
Impossible to get anything from that experience.
Even if Maura kept insisting she was supposed to have understood something vital.
It wasn't that she didn't get what Maura was saying. Yes, absolutely, trying to change her reaction and interactions with everyone was stressful. And yes it did make things somewhat awkward.
Especially for her.
She had despised every minute of yesterday morning. But wasn't that how it went with any sort of change?
If she was honest, Maura was right. It was actually painful to try holding her personality back. And perhaps that meant it wasn't being natural, or as Maura put it, "true to who she was," but that couldn't be the only reason women hit on her or that dyke was an insult of choice.
Jane ran her hand along her clothes again, making sure everything was still in order.
There had to be something more than just her behavior for everyone to automatically assume she was a lesbian. Why was she considered gay just because she had all these characteristics that were opposite from someone like Maura? Did people have to freakin' assume that only lesbians would choose to act in a way that was considered a masculine?
Maura's biggest point over lunch, if Jane cut out the long explanations and side stories, was that you couldn't put a gender on personality attributes, but society did. Because of that, people were raised to associate traits with gender and behaviors associated with power, protection, and authority tended to be traditionally lumped in with men.
In Maura's estimation, lesbians were not entirely bound by society constraints because they already lived outside the traditional mold. By choosing to live a lifestyle that could make people who embraced traditional male/female roles uncomfortable it meant expression rather than repression of innate power and leadership in order to make a life for themselves.
These were not traits often viewed as appropriate for women. And when you insisted on being different you tended to cause fear in others. Fear made people react in various ways, including censorship and ridicule. Dyke, when used as an insult, was used to convey all that was undesirable and incorrect with a woman.
So a woman, regardless of her sexual orientation, who was able to express strong, powerful, self assurance in a position of authority, even in the face of a direct challenge from a traditionally minded male could be considered threatening. People often felt fear when threatened and a reaction to fear might be flight, but for a narrow minded, misogynic male it would be to fight back.
So when she had been called a dyke the other day it was less about sexuality and more about an attack on her presentation of power and authority.
Okay so she got it. She really did understand.
She did.
So perhaps if Maura pressed her, Jane was ready to admit she had some tendencies that normally people associated with guys, but like Maura said, those made her a strong, confident woman. She'd even buy a blasted cake and celebrate it like Maura seemed to want, but for now Jane still didn't get why the first derogatory thing people seemed to latch onto with her was the whole dyke thing.
Why, exactly, her behavior around Maura also made people rush to the conclusion of lesbian was still a point of debate. Behavior that it turned out Maura was not only aware of but apparently accepted as part of their friendship.
Or, if Maura's demonstration with her jacket yesterday was anything to go by, expected it.
Jane rubbed the back of her neck and tried not to ruin her hair. One of the things she couldn't get out of her head was that Maura was also a strong, confident, career woman in a position of authority. Her title with the Commonwealth of Massachusetts held even greater authority and prestige than Jane's own. But to Jane's knowledge, nobody went around calling Maura a dyke.
Which was why this entire thing was frustrating. Like Maura, there were plenty of powerful women in some pretty powerful jobs that people did not go around assuming were lesbians. Certainly there were enough women on the force that didn't instantly get slapped with the lesbian label because they were cops, even the ones that were lesbians like Bonnie Evans.
Jane was almost tempted to ask them if they all got hit on by other women. Especially the ones she knew were happily married to men. But it wasn't exactly a conversation she was willing to have.
All Jane knew after 24 hours of Maura-led confusion was that it wasn't exactly her job, and it wasn't exactly her personality. Not in her estimation at least.
Ergo it had to be the clothes.
So here she was. In a skirt and heels, running through some convoluted social experiment like she was a lab rat.
Because Jane was positive she had been right the other night. It had to be the clothes and the lack of makeup. There had to be truth in clichés like "you are what you wear". Over her steak yesterday she had succinctly pointed this out, in detail, to Maura, case review style.
Not that it mattered. Maura really hadn't said much after that, which was kind of disturbing in itself. No, instead of some sort of Maura-like lecture all Jane got was this patient look like she was missing something, and a change in topic.
That had made her feel slightly insane. Or dense. Neither of which was reassuring.
But either way, at least Maura had agreed to Jane's version of a do-over. She had even seemed a little excited about it.
Why wouldn't Maura be happy? It was an afternoon of shopping together out on Newbury Street. Block after block of trendy boutiques, hair salons, and overpriced restaurants. The type of area Jane usually avoided and here she was in an outfit that was something Maura would wear herself. She'd even had her hair blown out and set after Maura offered to have a favor called in to her salon to make it happen.
Absently Jane ran her hands over her smooth locks. She didn't even look like herself. The stylist was probably icing his wrist after getting it to look like this, but Jane was curious as hell see Maura's reaction. And while she personally was never going to spend that much time every day wrestling it into submission, she had to admit it wasn't half bad.
Really it was actually kind of pretty.
So she had the looks part of today ready. All she had to do now was be herself and that was a giant relief after yesterday.
Today she was going to be Jane Rizzoli, but Jane Rizzoli wearing a silk blouse, skirt, and heels.
With the added bonus of perfect hair, there was no way she wasn't going to be able to finally prove her point: how people reacted to you was more about the clothing than any behavior.
To Jane it was simple. If you don't look like a dyke, people aren't going to assume you are one, or think that they can hurl it at as an insult to knock you down.
With a sigh Jane checked her watch. It was still a few minutes early but there was no reason she couldn't find out where Maura was. Her hand flew to her waist only to hit the smooth silk of her blouse instead of her cell phone. That's right. No belt with a cell phone holder.
She had a purse today.
Why women couldn't be logical about where they put something they needed access to all the time like a cell phone was a bit of mystery. Why not just put the darn thing on your waist for easy access?
Or at least put pockets in a skirt that could hold more than a stick of gum.
What was the point to tiny pockets that you couldn't really use? How was that fashionable? Better yet, why was that fashionable?
Jane went to reach for her purse when she realized it wasn't on her arm. Her hand froze for a moment in midair.
Well shit.
Her heart raced as she tried to remember exactly when she last remembered having it. Her wallet, her badge, her house keys, everything except her gun, was in that stupid piece of leather.
Frantically she looked up and down the street considering what direction to go first. The last time she clearly remembered having it was at the register back at the salon. Or it could be in that bookstore a few streets over. She'd browsed through there to kill time but she hadn't bought anything. Maybe she put it on one of the shelves.
It had to be at either one of those places. If somebody didn't take off with it.
This is exactly why pockets were superior. They went wherever your pants went. Simple and logical.
This shit was not.
With a growl, Jane went to stalk off towards the bookstore when her stride was restricted by the cut of her skirt and she stumbled slightly. Damn it. She took a deep breath. She was about to try again when she caught Maura's voice calling her name.
She turned around slowly and there was Maura. Gliding along, completely unbothered by the limitations of her skirt, her own purse secure on her shoulder, hair bouncing in the sun with a smile on her face.
Jane had seen this image a million times before. But this time? This time she appreciated it a heck of a lot more. Not because Maura looked fabulous. Maura always did. It wasn't because she seemed poised and put together. No, that was how Maura always was.
It wasn't even the perfect hair. Maura's hair was always perfect.
No, Jane couldn't help but realize that Maura seemed happy. She wasn't irritated by the nylons on her legs or the fact that she was carrying a purse. She had probably spent an hour this morning getting her hair to look like that and she'd cheerfully do it all over again tomorrow.
It struck Jane as Maura's smile widened as she waved to her, that Maura had never felt the need to change. Even when they teased her again and again about her love of fashion or any time Jane cracked a comment about stilettos at a crime scene.
It was part of who Maura was and she was happy being who she was, screw the rest of them.
Expressed in a slightly more polite way of course, but still.
And as Maura drew up in front of her, eyes bright and happy, Jane realized that maybe that was part of what Maura had been trying to show her yesterday. She opened her mouth to say hello but closed it with a snap when her missing purse was swatted lightly against her stomach.
"Here, you lost your purse, Detective. Sorry I'm a little late, but the salon thought to call me since I made your appointment." Maura let herself enjoy looking Jane up and down. "They did a fabulous job on your hair." She couldn't help but reach out and touch the smooth strands, running the silky ends between her fingers, seeming lost in thought for a moment before slowly dropping her hand away. "You look lovely."
Maybe it was the way Maura's voice had softened or maybe it was her proximity, but either way Jane felt a hot flush creep up her neck and over her face. She took a hasty step back. "Great. This your polite way of telling me I look like shit the rest of the time, isn't it?"
The pinch to her bicep was sharp and sudden. "Hey OW!" Jane rubbed the spot furiously. "You have got to stop doing that!"
Maura ignored the glare leveled at her and took Jane's arm. "Don't be silly. I've called you beautiful enough that by now you should know I appreciate how you generally appear." With a gentle tug on Jane's elbow they started walking arm and arm along the sidewalk. "Perhaps there are times where you could pay more attention to the overall quality of your undergarments, and you do need to accept that some colors are not complimentary to your complexion, but you are aesthetically pleasing."
Maura looked up at Jane briefly and ignored the eye roll, instead choosing to pull Jane a little closer as they strolled. "It's supposed to rain later. Where is your coat? And while we're down here I actually have a few stops I need to make, but then I'd like to have coffee."
Jane shrugged. "I didn't have one that went with the skirt, and whatever you want to do today is fine by me."
Maura nodded. "Good. I had some thoughts last night and I realized there was something we should talk about."
"More talking?" Jane groaned. "Well that sounds like so much fun and I only get coffee this time. Yesterday I rated a steak."
"What if I said I had a present for you after?" Maura kept her eyes trained forward, trying not to smile.
"I'd say I'm even more worried if you think you have to bribe me with gifts." Jane glanced to the side, trying not to be influenced by Maura's mouth as it twitched at the corners. When their eyes caught and Maura's smile broke free, Jane couldn't help but grin back. "Okay, fine. I'll bite. What are we going to be talking about?"
"I'm curious. Why Casey?"
A/N – Couple of things... I want to thank everyone for the reviews and response. I love how many of you are always game to come on a little journey with me. Some of your reviews are what make me keep going when I'd like to hit my head on my keyboard over and over in punishment for even thinking about tackling certain stories.
But most importantly...Poor CharlietheCAG… she needs props from the readers. Every fic has that chapter that is a B*TCH to write. This was it for me on this one. After days of tweaking option A I then went and cropped and chopped it into option B. It was the beta work that never ended…thanks Charlie!