Cora paced the floor of the Dower house living room as she waited for Robert to arrive. He came at the same time each day and had tea with her while her mother busiest herself in the next room. Some days they had taken a walk to the village, some days they stayed in and read excerpts of their favorite books to each other, and then on the best days they had taken the carriage to Downton and walked the grounds. Those were the days they had let their hands roam across each other's bodies and the heat between them and grown. But today Cora was not planning on any of that. She had to ask him. She had to know the truth. Although in her heart she dismissed it as a bald face lie, in her mind she had gone over all the things he had told her, all the things he had said and she was not entirely sure. It was early this morning when she realized that he had never said that he loved her, he had said other words and endearments, but never that. Perhaps it was an oversight, perhaps he was saving the declaration, perhaps … well, she didn't want to think on that perhaps. She had been so free with her 'I love yous' since the engagement; she had not noticed that she was not getting any back.
When Robert finally arrived Cora felt as though she had paced a hole in the floor. He greeted her with his usual warm smile and took her hands, but he stopped halfway as he leaned down to kiss her cheek.
"Cora are you quite alright?" she looked drawn, her eyes carried a sadness he didn't care to see in them and he could tell she was agitated.
"Only you can answer that Robert" she said quietly. The tone in her voice brought him to a standstill and he knew straight away that something was amiss.
"I will do anything to help you, of course I will, come let's sit and find a way" he showed her to the couch taking the seat across from her so he could look into her eyes and see her face. His stomach was in knots as he pondered what could make her feel this way"
"It's quite simple really Robert. Tell me you love me and it will all be well" Cora knew she was being too abrupt, too demanding, but she knew what she needed to hear and what her heart required of him. She saw Robert's eyes grow wide and her heart broke into a million pieces. She had her answer. They were right, what she had heard was the truth.
"I … what? Cora, what is the matter? I adore you, you know that." Robert knew that somehow she knew his true motives and it caused him to panic just a little. He could not fall short of saving Downton, not when he was so close.
"You adore me, but you do not love me … I see." Cora rose to her feet and walked away from him, Robert stood and followed. This was not happening. He had to save Downton, he had to. He wanted to marry her as well. He truly did … what was love when it came to that?
"Cora, I … "
"Please don't!" Cora whipped around and he saw her eyes glassy with tears, his stomach knotted at the sight and he felt sick. He made to speak again but she held her hand up to stop him. "If you cannot tell me you love me then tell me that your motives in pursuing me were not my impressive dowry? Tell me that and I shall be happy"
Robert's mouth had gone dry. He could not tell her a lie, he would not lie to her and he hung his head to escape her gaze.
Cora took a deep breath. She had known it was true when she heard Violet Crawley and her guest last evening. She had known it in her bones, but now she knew it in her heart and it hurt worse than anything she could imagine.
"Tell me you would marry me now, even without my dowry Robert? Hmm? How about that?" she had kept her voice low, but the anger in it was clear.
"I can't" was all he could muster and she made as if to leave the room.
"Cora wait, I …" Robert tried to think, tried to think what he could say to her.
"What should I wait for Robert? Have you suddenly grown a heart? You are ready to profess your love in order to receive my money?" Cora knew that was harsh, but she was hurting, she did not care.
"I have never lied to you Cora, and I never will" Robert said gently, the sadness in his eyes was clear and she thought she saw a tear welling in the corner of them. She looked away, broken hearted or not she could not stop loving him. She headed for the door and stopped in the doorway, her back still toward him.
"You knew what I wanted from a marriage, and still you pursued me in this manner … is that not a lie Robert?" … and with that she walked out of the room.