Disclaimer: I own nothing – at least nothing Transformers related.
AN: I'm glad you liked my last chapter so much.
Your reviews were wonderful and I'm happy to have so many great readers and even more grateful to have such an understanding and patient Beta.
By now you have convinced me to post "Monster" anew as its own story.
Some of you asked me about a possible sequel.
There will be one, named "What Else Is Left?", but I'm still lacking some ideas, so it will be some time until I post it.
Thanks to mdnytryder for correcting this chapter.
10/28 Naughty (G1)
After Megatron called "Retreat!" the procedure was the same every time.
The injured Decepticons took to the air, clutching various injuries, insulting the cheering Autobots, and flew home to lick their wounds.
Some would do it quietly, and some would not, like Starscream who used every chance given to moan and bitch and rant about how all of this would have never happened if he was the leader and not Megatron.
Most Decepticons had learned to tune him out by now.
But the fact that the other Seekers had joined his whining was unusual.
All of them were dented and scratched, the work of two certain Lamborghinis with egos the size of Cybertron's moons, and who had become insufferable over time.
At this particular moment, it was Thrust who complained the loudest about a mangled wing.
"Look at what this red mud-gorger did to my wing! My wonderful, precious, beautiful, perfect wing! It will never be the same again! And I would have fought so brilliantly in the last battle if not for those two idiots!"
Thrust's whining was annoying but usual, and no reason for worry as far as the other Decepticons were concerned. He held the distinction of being the second worst loudmouthed coward after all, right behind his own Air commander.
But hearing Thundercracker – calm, reasonable, quiet Thundercracker, the one exception to the rule that all Seekers were a few circuits short a motherboard – ranting about the Autobot twins and their various insults to his person as well, was just too much to bear for most of the non-jetformers of the Decepticon army.
They hurried to put some distance between themselves and their six winged colleagues.
Perhaps their condition was contagious and they all would end ups as bitching and whimpering little Starscream-imitations?
Who knew?
"I really have had enough of them calling me Decepti-chicken, Cyber-turkey or Techno-vulture whenever they see me!" The blue Seeker growled in a low tone, sending vibrations through the air with his engines. "And my sonic boom certainly has NOTHING to do with indigestion!"
As if to prove this statement, the air around him exploded into sound and shockwaves, leaving the other Seekers struggling to stay airborne as their gyros were sent spinning.
"Don't ever do that again!" snarled Ramjet as the world around him finally stopped swirling.
His belly was scratched badly, with painful looking marks where stones and rocks had been imbedded when he had crashed.
"Why not? Are you afraid you'll crash, huh? As if you'd need my help for that!" challenged Thundercracker hotly and the air began to vibrate again.
"His constant crashing wouldn't be a problem, if he would manage to hit a proper target sometimes," murmured Dirge gloomily.
"But noooo…. Those pitspawned twins even painted bulls eyes on their afts this time and still he sailed right past them and into Devastator's leg, costing us the victory." He sighed gravely. "They will never fear us again, never..."
"As if they had ever feared you to begin with," scoffed Skywarp.
"Face it! Nobody is scared of you and your "Engines of Doom". Primus, not even the squishies do as much as twitch now when you fly over them. Perhaps you should change your image? Next time land and laugh insanely! That will have them staring!"
The purple and black jet yelped when Dirge whacked him with one dented wing over the nosecone.
"I would be quiet if I were you, Skywarp!" the Conehead stated dangerously.
The other Seeker snorted unimpressed, "Thank Primus, that you're not me."
"My sentiment exactly," murmured Thundercracker who shuddered at the thought of two purple morons running around and pranking everything in sight.
Thrust, who flew beside him, snickered evilly.
Dirge continued as if nothing had happened, "At least dumb and dumber aren't placing bets as to when I will splinter myself with one of my teleports!"
Skywarp shuddered violently. The thought alone set his tanks churning.
"I'm good at what I do. That will never happen," he stated firmly, trying to reassure himself.
The other jets snickered. "Keep telling yourself that."
"Hey, Skywarp," hollered Ramjet suddenly. "Look, I've found your CPU! Unicron's spawns were right: You really left it behind after teleporting a few days ago. Aw, it's so cute and tiny…. Can I keep it? You don't seem to need it!"
"SHUT UP, SCUMJET!" Roared Skywarp over the laughter of his fellow Cons.
If he hadn't been so slagging exhausted after three hours of nearly constant jet judo and dodging shots, he would have helped Ramjet to live up to his name – again.
Instead he gained some speed and placed himself beside his Air commander, hoping against better judgment for some help and sympathy, "Screamer! They are mocking me again! Tell them to stop!"
Starscream - the once golden canopy reduced to a few glittering shards sticking here and there out of the edge of his cockpit, his nosecone currently reminding one of an oversized accordion, and his ailerons showing rips from the stress of holding too much weight in the air with too little wingspan - didn't answer.
In fact, he had been awfully and unusually quiet the whole time, now that Skywarp thought about it.
Perhaps he had been more damaged than he first let on?
The red and white Seeker really had been the unlucky Con of today's battle.
Sideswipe and Sunstreaker had used Dirge and Thundercracker as lifts to jump onto the unsuspecting Air Commander's back, smashing his canopy in the progress. While clinging with one hand each to the sensitive wings of the bucking, cursing and screeching Seeker, they suddenly had taken glue coated weights out of their subspace with their free hands and proceeded to stick them all around Starscream's body, laughing like the loons they were as the jetformer shrieked in naked panic when his wings failed to keep the three Cybertronians and the extra burden airborne.
The twins had saved themselves with Sideswipe's jetpack, landing safely and out of reach behind their own lines, amongst cheering comrades, while Starscream had made painful contact with the next cliff.
Fortunately he hadn't flown very high to begin with, but the crash must have hurt like the pit.
Even now Skywarp couldn't help but wince in sympathy when he thought about the painful jolts the air current must be sending through the red and white wings, straight into his Commander's cranial unit where it would supposedly mutate into the mother of all processor aches.
The black and purple Seeker hesitated, then he nudged his wingmate gently with a wingtip, hoping that Starscream didn't need all his concentration to just stay airborne, "Starscream? You okay?"
By now, the other Seekers had noticed the odd behavior of their leader, and focused all their functioning sensors on the white, red and blue jet, wondering if they would have to catch him any second.
But Starscream didn't fall.
In fact, he began to chuckle suddenly.
"I'm fine…. No, in fact, I'm feeling great!" His chuckling changed into a mad cackling that sent his fellow jets desperately backing off.
"Are you sure?" Asked Thrust timidly from his safe place behind Thundercracker and Ramjet.
"Yessss!" purred Starscream with a clear grin in his tone.
"I… have a plan!" He declared proudly. "And for once it will work perfectly!"
The other Seekers hesitated for a moment, but Starscream didn't seem to be talking about a new attempt to overthrow Megatron and if he had an idea how to put these obnoxious, overbearing ground-pounders down a notch or two….
They flew as close up to him as they dared and began to silently talk over their com links.
Soon five different voices joined the first in wild laughter full of anticipation.
The twins would never knew what hit them, but they had it coming for a long time and perhaps they would finally learn to treat the Seekers with the appropriate amount of respect.
The other Decepticons, hearing the laughter, exchanged wary glances and looked to Megatron, searching for help, guidance, or at least an explanation to what happened.
But the silver behemoth just flew faster and made sure he didn't turn around.
Sometimes he just didn't want to know….
"Everything prepared and accounted for?"
It was the tenth time that Starscream asked this particular question but no Seeker could resist the chance to crow "Check!" through the com link again in expectant glee. Even Dirge sounded hopeful and excited.
Starscream grinned evilly and rubbed his hands, "Then let operation 'Sweet Revenge' begin!"
It was a battle like any other.
Insults and laser shots flew, metal smashed against metal, the usual speeches and catch phrases were heard and Sunstreaker and Sideswipe had the time of their lives.
The red twin held onto Skywarp for dear life, hollering insults and taunts at the top of his vocalizer, while his pedes left deep and painful dents near the purple and black jet's tail and the tight digits scratched the surface of his wings.
"Hey, Warpy! What's the matter? Are you giving up already? Aw, come on! Let a poor bot have some fun, here! You are the dumbest and lamest rodeo bull I've ever ridden and that's an insult to every honest cow out there! YEEHAH! FOR WORLD PEACE AND MARHSMALLOWS!"
'What the frag? Marshmallows?' Skywarp was stunned for a moment, then he remembered that no Decepticon cared if his supposed victim was an old mech, a Youngling or an immature spawn of everything that is bad and unholy with ten chips short a halfway functioning, glitch-ridden processor, and smirked mentally.
"I was just getting into position," he said just loud enough for Sideswipe to hear above his own whoops of delight.
"Into position for what?" Asked the red rose of rowdiness curiously. "You look bad wherever you crash, no offence, but even a field of flowers couldn't change that, Warpy-boy!"
Skywarp didn't rise to the taunt, only his inner grin got wider and nastier, "You'll see!"
And with that both mechs simply vanished from the battlefield.
Sunstreaker didn't notice the sudden disappearance of his brother, but then again, he was busy with far more important things...
Currently, the yellow menace sat onto Starscream's back with his arms deep inside the smashed golden canopy, digging his fingers painfully into the sensitive interior of the cockpit, ripping various pieces out of the shrieking and crying jet and throwing them away in wild abandon, an ugly sneer on his handsome face.
Starscream really, really never had wanted to hear Thrust's voice as dearly as now, in this exact moment, as Sunstreaker twisted his hand inside his internals and pulled at something the red Seeker didn't even want to think about.
"Screamer? Pitspawn number one is safe and secure in his new home and we're awaiting your arrival."
"Thank Primus, finally!" The tortured Seeker exclaimed and shot off, Sunstreaker clinging to his back and cursing up a storm.
The Air commander left the battlefield behind, ignoring the different shouts and com calls of his abandoned comrades, putting more and more space between himself, his "guest" and the two factions. His internals hurt like the pit and he could feel sparks scorching the few things that had escaped Sunstreaker's wrath.
Driven by rage, pain and a burning lust for vengeance, he arrived at the meeting point in no time, a deep and narrow canyon, that wove like a snake through the barren landscape.
He dove down, gaining even more speed, shooting through the tight turns like lightning, the edges of his wings almost scraping the walls, Sunstreaker screaming bloody murder on his back.
Three more turns, the shouts of the Autobot constantly in his audios, then he stopped as abruptly as he could, flipping over and catapulting the surprised yellow twin right off his back and into a waiting net of reinforced titanium cables.
Thrust and Ramjet secured the prey and moved to the side, where Thundercracker, Dirge and Skywarp stood beside another net, which held Sideswipe utterly and totally immobile.
Starscream landed and transformed with painful moans.
His cockpit leaked Energon and coolant that streamed down his armor and gathered in a little bluish pink puddle by his feet, crackling with dying energy.
The other Seekers winced in sympathy at the sight.
"If I ever say again, 'I will take on Sunstreaker,' just shoot me." He ordered and began to pick glass shards out of his internals, each time flinching when he found one.
When he noticed that his subordinates still stood around, staring with wide optics at his gruesome task, he snarled in annoyance, "What are you looking at? Never seen a fellow Seeker suffer before? Do you want a live show on how I clean my innards or have you forgotten our two "guests" and our plan? You have work to do, misters!"
The five flyers had the decency to look sheepish at the scolding, then they hurried with big, nasty grins to set their revenge into motion.
Two of the Coneheads made a great show of taking syringes and little flasks with a yellowish liquid out of subspace and stepped slowly closer to their two captives who shared uneasy glances. Skywarp and Ramjet vanished behind the next bend, their snickering and whispering still clearly audible.
Thundercracker hesitated for a moment, and then he went to his Commander to help him repair his wounds.
Sideswipe looked to his brother and saw the same barely hidden fear in Sunstreaker's ice-blue optics that he himself felt.
He would have gulped, if it had been anatomically possible.
He gathered his remaining courage and asked quietly, "Are you going to kill us?"
Thundercracker and Starscream glanced up from their activity, while Dirge and Thrust halted in their steps to look back at their leader.
"No, we won't."
The red and white Seeker straightened his shoulders, puffed out what remained of his chest and stepped in front of the two nets which slowly swayed from side to side, both pairs of blue optics on his proud form.
Starscream put his arms akimbo and stated, "This is neither about the war nor about factions."
He lifted a single finger in the air and fixed the twins with a stern ruby red glare.
"This..." he paused for effect." is a matter of principle!"
All flyers cheered in approval, their voices uniting to the ultimate sound of doom in the twin's audios.
Starscream turned around and stepped back to Thundercracker to let him examine his cockpit. He gave a dismissive wave over his shoulder and called, "Gentlemechs! Inject the paralyzing agent!"
Dirge and Thrust grinned evilly and saluted, "Yes, sir! With pleasure, sir!"
The twins somehow managed to gulp this time.
Soft snickers echoed throughout the canyon, were hushed again, only to resume some seconds later muffled through hands and shoulders of comrades who shook in mirth themselves.
Optimus Prime tried to swallow his laughter, but his optics shone brightly in hidden glee.
His determination to remain stoic was put to the test when Ratchet arrived on the scene, finished with the task of treating the last of the wounded on the battlefield some kilometers from here.
The medic took one long glance at the sight that had all other Autobots rooted to the spot, then he fell to the ground guffawing, shouting something unintelligible that Prime roughly translated into "They had it coming! I knew it! Primus, thank you! They had it coming! I'm not fixing them this time! They had it coming! Brilliant!"
With that, the spell was broken and the other mechs broke down into helpless laughter at the expense of the two poor Autobots still swaying to and fro in their tight prisons.
But it really was a sight to behold.
Both nets hung about a mix of hay, straw, branches, wires and cables forming an enormous nest, which was dusted with bright sunshine-yellow and flame-red flakes of paint. In the middle of said nest, glittering innocently in the light of the midday sun, lay two, giant metallic eggs, one red, one yellow.
The sources of the brilliant flakes of color all around the two eggs were unmistakable.
The twins had been stripped violently of all their paint – one could only imagine how Sunstreaker had whined about his invaluable, precious, wonderful, glossy finish – only to be painted anew in a brilliant Decepticon purple.
But, in addition to this humiliation, the individuals responsible for the twins' dilemma had covered them in glue and red and yellow feathers, and painted a large Decepticon symbol on the canyon wall behind the unfortunate mechs, right below a message reading, "Who's the chicken now?"
Prime withstood his own laughing fit with an admirable strenght of will and managed to choke out, nearly losing it at the sight of Sideswipe flashing enraged optics over a neon red metallic beak, "Do you have anything to say about this… incident?"
Sideswipe opened his beak and stated, "Cluck!"
Once upon a time, this little story would have been "Kick Ass.". Sorry, but the new "Kick Ass" will follow but without the twin's involvement.
Why did this chapter happen?
You all should search for chapters with the twins here on this site. Most times you will find stories in which the two hellions win against the Seekers and ridicule them in the process. I love their pranks and attitude as much as any other reader here, but I thought it was time for a little change – and sweet, sweet revenge.