Disclaimer: I don't own Saint Seiya characters!

Author's Note: Chapter made with a big help of my dear friend, Nica-Angel. Thank you, dear!

His World of Freedom

Camus took one deep breathe and on the trembling legs he entered the Scorpio Temple. He was really afraid of this meeting with Milo, he could imagine how angry and disappointed the Scorpio was right now. After all, his best friend left him alone, with his burden and pain. Ugh, Camus was disappointed with himself! What he was thinking going to Siberia? That it was the best way to handle everything? Hide in the cold corner of the world and refuse to see anyone? Refuse to help his best friend? How stupid he was!

He couldn't feel Saga's cosmo anymore. For a long while his legs couldn't move. Did Milo kill the Gemini Saint? Did Saga face the most terrible death, full of the pain, driving him crazy? Did the Scorpio enjoyed this final moment, when the soul was leaving the destroyed body to find the peace finally? Was Saga dead…? Would Milo do the same to him right now? Was his crime for Milo equal with Saga's one?

Camus hated to admit that, but he was scared. He was afraid that the first moment Milo would look at him, Camus would feel the wrath of the Scarlet Needle. Not like he didn't deserve for that, but… But he wanted to live a little more. Now, when he finally saw his endless stupidity and selfishness, he wanted to live more, to help Milo, to atone for his sins, to guard the life of his beloved friend. And maybe… and maybe even save his dark soul if it was possible right now.

He still couldn't get rid of the suspicion that Milo would hate him forever, and actually should hate right now. That no matter what Camus' reasons were – his stupidity, selfishness or Hades' darkness – their friendship was gone forever. He failed and only this fact mattered. Passing through the hallway, he had no hope of having Milo's trust just like that. He was aware that if he wanted to regain this friendship, he had long and hard way to go.

He heard soft steps between the shadows. In less than some seconds, his muscles got tense. This was it – his end. Meeting with Milo, his hatred and Scarlet Needle.

He couldn't even take one deep breath, when the tall silhouette left the shadows and Camus could look inside the surprised eyes of his beloved Milo.

An hour ago, when he was passing through this Temple with DeathMask he had no time to look carefully at the Scorpio. Now, in the hall, he could see the whole body, the face, eyes and curls. He gasped, a little surprised. He was suspecting Milo being in a worse state. After all, not so long time ago, the Scorpio tried to kill himself. But right now Milo had a strange calmness inside his eyes, some stubbornness, and quiet sorrow. Yes, he was pale, he was sad. But Camus thought he would look far worse. He was expecting Milo to have deep shadows under his bright eyes that right now were regaining this wonderful glance of the old Scorpio. Maybe it was the cause of bringing Saga to the brink of death, but right now Milo seemed to really calm, empty of the frustration and surely he didn't look like someone who wanted to die.

He sighed with relief. He was afraid to see Milo in much worse state right now, after facing Saga and the Gemini's crime face to face. But this little dangerous and provocative glance of the blue eyes, this aliveness inside them relieved him pretty much. Kanon had the right, Milo was healing right now. There was a hope he would never try to kill himself again.

At the first look inside these bright eyes Camus loved, he could feel this something- Hades' darkness, as Pope said – almost disappearing in the light that fell on his existence. Oh, how much he missed these eyes, how much he wanted to see them! It was like his long forgotten dream come true. He couldn't believe how he could leave these wonderful eyes alone, how he could leave his best friend and just escape. It was something beyond his abilities of understanding.

The bright eyes of Milo widened with the surprise. For a long while he wasn't able to move. He never expected to see Camus here, when the Aquarius was stubbornly refusing to go back. Why he was here anyway? And why now?

"Milo…" whispered Camus, still being amazed that the Scarlet Needle didn't fall at him.

Milo gulped. The anger at Camus was mixing with the happiness that finally he could look inside these dark eyes he admired so much. Big part of him just hated Camus for leaving, for escaping and not helping him in the worst time of his life. But the other part was just glad too see him finally, to be able to look at this pale skin of the French, at these long lashes and soft strands of the aquamarine hairs. Small part of his soul felt guilty, that if he himself wouldn't fail as a friend, Camus wouldn't leave in the first place. That if he wouldn't allow Saga to affect him then they wouldn't land in one bed. He wouldn't give Camus meaningless hope. And… And he felt victorious. Because he was standing there, alive. That he managed to survive these awful weeks without the help of this man who once was called his best friend.

"What are you doing here?" he asked a little coldly. He couldn't stop himself. Yes, he was happy a little, there were still remains of their deep relationship they had weeks ago. Just like he still loved Kanon after the Gemini raped him, that now he was not able to get rid of everything he felt toward Camus before the French left. But this small happiness couldn't be compared to the angry that took control of his other emotions.

"I came to see you, Milo. I want to talk with you about something."

Milo snorted. Talk? About what? About how much he felt sorry right now? Or how much he didn't want to stay here? Or how much he felt alone on Siberia?

"Talk? Don't make me laugh, Camus. You didn't even want to see my face when I went to visit you! Now you think you would simply come and be received with open arms?! Go away. Return to your damn Siberia," he couldn't stop it. The frustration flew out of his soul once more; the anger took control of his emotions. He wanted to yell at Camus.

"Milo, I…"

"Just stop. Leave," added Milo, gasping his fists with the frustration.

He turned around and walked away, disappearing in shadows.

Camus sighed deeply, sadly. He was expecting something different. Screams, tears and hate as sure. Rain of Scarlet Needles, maybe. But it ended without physical pain. It ended without blood, without begging to stop the Needles. The Aquarius was still afraid of dying right now, from Milo's hand.

But in the deepest part of his soul he felt a little disappointed. In some corner of his mind he had the hope Milo would listen to him instantly.

But… He wouldn't leave. He wouldn't give up right now. If there was hope that he would be at use for Milo, if there was the possibility that Camus would be able to stop the Scorpio from suicide in the future; if there was the hope of saving this friendship they had in the past, he would even beg Milo to let him stay. He knew he failed. He could see that Milo managed to survive without him, with the help of Kanon and their companions. But if there was a slight chance that Milo would break again, that the Scorpio would try to kill himself again; if there was the chance he would stop him, then there was no way Camus would leave again. Even if Milo would not forgive him for the rest of their lives.

With a fierce look on his face he followed his best friend.

"Milo, please, just talk with me," he started quietly, feeling really desperate. He was aware, that if Milo was angry right now, then any move could end with the rain of painful Scarlet Needles.

"Why should I? You didn't want to talk with me just before I tried to kill myself two weeks ago, even if I begged you to open that damn doors!" Milo screamed, almost running through the Temple.

The French stopped. Two weeks ago? Just before Milo's first attempt?

He froze. He never thought his blood could turn into the ice, but right now it was exactly what happened.

"Milo… I wasn't there…" he murmured, knowing it wouldn't help at all.

But Milo stopped and through his shoulder he looked at the Aquarius Saint.

"What do you mean you weren't there?" he asked aggressively.

"I wasn't in my hut back then, Milo. I was in the nearest village…" Camus whispered. "I came back at the morning…"

For a while there was silence.

"Do you think that it could change anything?" Milo whispered angrily. This pathetic excuse wasn't good enough to change something. It was far too late for that.

He looked challengingly at the Aquarius, waiting for the pathetic excuse. He was waiting, with his Needle wanting to be free again, at the first words that it changed everything, and he, Camus was not at fault for the first suicidal attempt of Milo.

"No," the words fell.

For a long while Milo wasn't able to say anything. He felt like his Needle almost twitched from the disappointment. This wonderful feeling, accompanying him, when he was striking Saga wanted to return to him right now.

"It doesn't change anything, Milo. It is too late already…" Camus murmured, glad that Milo stopped and maybe right now he would have the occasion to talk with the Scorpio. He heard short smirk, coming up from his best friend he abandoned.

"Well, I'm surprised you realized this, you selfish bastard," answered the Scorpio not even trying to hold his tongue. This bitterness of the abandoning was now filling his soul. He was always at Camus' side, supporting him, cheering him up. But it seemed it meant nothing to the cold Saint of the Aquarius, because Camus left him in the worst moment of his life. And why? Because he felt hurt.

Camus bit his lips, hearing that. He knew he deserved for much worse words right now. Returning, when Milo was at the straight path to being completely healed, when the worst days of Milo was far away in the past. Returning just now, when his own darkness started to yearn for his life stronger. Really, what a selfish bastard he was? Now every word he was preparing before entering the Scorpio Temple; every explanation, that was suppose to redeem him even a little weren't enough. They were just like the child's words, pathetic excuse not worth of being told to Milo. How could he even consider saying something so idiotic? The Hades' darkness? Oh, for Athena's sake, it was the most pathetic excuse ever!

"Why are you so quiet? Don't you want to talk with me? Where are your pathetic excuses, huh? Where is the touching story about how much you were hurt by your friend, who refused to love you? Where are the words about how lonely you were in the Siberia?" Milo gasped his fists, looking furiously at the Aquarius. He could see the sad, blue eyes, but it had no matter for him anymore. He could see the defeated expression, the uncertainty in the dark look of Camus, but that was unimportant as well. Everything concerned with Camus lost the matter for him right now. The friend he needed for many weeks, the friend he wanted to see, to hear, to touch wasn't his friend anymore. Camus was now just a stranger, someone only with the same rank like him. Only fellow, someone under the command of the Athena. Nothing more.

The Aquarius sighed deeply.

"I have no excuse, Milo. Whatever I would say right now it is not worth of saying. Any excuse is good enough for what I have done to you. I would just ashamed myself more with these words I wanted to say," answered Camus, looking inside the light, blue eyes of his friend.

"Then why are you here, huh? If you have nothing to say right now, then what you returned for? Why now? Why not when I needed you?!" Milo almost screamed, holding his Scarlet Needle with the last strength. If it would go like that further, he would strike Camus just like while ago he was striking Saga. "Why you left anyway?" he added, a bit calmer.

Now Camus gasped his fists. What should he say? He had every answer for all these questions, but they would not help. They were just pathetic words of someone who didn't want to admit his own stupidity, selfishness and worthlessness. The Aquarius knew right now that he was not even worth of excusing himself in the front of Milo. Not now, not being so late.

"I left, because I'm the stupidest person on the world. Not only stupid, but also selfish. I was always thinking you were for me, that you would be always by my side no matter what." Why he didn't realize it sooner? Why only now? It was so visible for everyone. He was always taking from Milo, usually giving nothing in return of that warmness he was receiving. "I know that I'm not worth of being your friend right now; actually I wasn't worth of being called that from the very beginning. I just… I'm just a stupid Saint, the most stupid one who understand the importance of your smiles, of your eyes and voice pretty late."

Milo smirked again.

"Do you really think your words could please me right now? That they would soften my anger, Camus? Do you really think that?"

"No. I don't believe that these words could help with anything. And I know that they mean nothing for you right now," answered Camus, feeling pretty bad. It was too late to realize all these things. It was too late for returning like nothing happened; having the hope that Milo would not hate him. "I can't even imagine how disappointed you are with me. I failed, Milo. I know that. And I'm aware you could even hate me right now for everything. I wouldn't be surprised of that. I deserved. Maybe even more than Saga. You have the full right to hate me, Milo." He gulped quietly, wondering why Milo was so quiet right now. Was he preparing to strike? Or really didn't care about what Camus was saying? "I hate myself too," he added with empty voice.

What should he say more? Was there anything worth even a little of saying to Milo? Could he say anything to not deepen the hate of Milo?

"I have no right to say it right now, but I want to stay here. I know it is too late of showing how much I would like to help you. I should never leave. But I'm here right now and I will do everything for you, Milo. I will do everything I would be able. I won't leave again, even if you would say you hate me so much, you won't to see my face anymore."

Milo's face twitched a little, his eyes darkened a little. Indeed, looking at Camus face wasn't so comfortable. It was remaining him his rape, and the night he spend with Camus. He didn't want to remember that, especially what Kanon and Saga did that evening.

Camus sighed. There was just only one thing he could say right now. From now one everything depended of Milo.

So, before the Scorpio managed to say something, or even move about millimeters, Camus kneeled before him and bowed deeply, in the pose of the deepest apology.

"Milo, I'm sorry for myself. I'm not asking you for the forgiveness right now, because I'm not worth of it. But I'm begging you to give me a chance to gain your forgiveness. Please, Milo, give me a chance to become your friend finally. Give me a chance to redeem myself."

Milo blinked a few times. When Camus followed him, he was expecting a lot of excuses, stupid and pathetic apologies, stream of the words about the loneliness Camus was living since a few weeks. He expected the Aquarius to show the worst side of the selfishness. But his heart twitched in a good way, looking at the curled silhouette at his feet, that was apologizing from the bottom of his heart. No, it wasn't what he expected.

"Chance, you say…?" he murmured. Could he…? "Raise your head, Camus."

Trembling a little, the Aquarius obeyed. The look of Milo assured him, that there would be no chance. There would be no forgiveness. Never.

"You want a chance? Fine. You have one. Just only one chance. But be sure, that it won't be easy. You will have to do many things to regain my friendship, Camus. But for now, just leave my Temple," he said, not being sure if he did the right thing. Was Camus even able to do enough to be his friend once more?

But… everyone was worth of having a second chance. Kanon, who raped him had one. And used it very well. Even Saga had the chance of atoning for his sins. Then, why he shouldn't give this chance to Camus, someone who was really important for him? The Aquarius showed him now some willingness to change his attitude. So… Maybe it was right?

He looked for the last time inside the dark eyes of Camus, turned away and left the hallway with very surprised Camus, still kneeling on the floor.

It was a good dream. He knew that. It was dream he forgot how to feel dreaming like that. There was no pain, no suffering, to tears and no sorrow. There was no darkness. It passed already a long time, when he last time had such a good dream. He couldn't remember it too well, there was only the blue sea, big apple tree and… that's all. He felt calmness in that dream, something he forgot weeks ago. For a long while he was too confused to think normally, since a while his life was pretty hard. It was so amazing, so nice. It was bringing him the wonderful memories of the past, when he was still happy.

And with the same calmness, he just opened his bright eyes, feeling full of the hope. He had no idea if it was just the effect of the dream, or he really felt like that, but now he was sure he would be able to look at the world just differently. Maybe he just reached some point, when the sadness was finally far away from him, maybe he just was in the state, when nothing would hurt him more like he was in the past few weeks. Or… It could be just the mirage, created by that good dream. Maybe it would disappear just like the soap bubble. Just in a few seconds, only a little more time and he would be again in that gray world…

He had no idea from where this calmness came. Last day it was just the ordinary day, when he was watching over his small trainees, when the laugh of Aldebaran just filled the whole Sanctuary and no one was sure why. It was the day, when DeathMask made a joke about Kanon and the Gemini didn't looked like he was about to be killed by his worst nightmare.

Maybe it was because everything seemed to return to the right place? Aiolia finally stopped to order him to eat to not get beaten up by the Leo, DeathMask looked calmer, when it seemed one of his fellows did not want to die just now; Saga, maybe even if he used really weak argumentation, really pathetic excuse, wanted, really wanted from the bottom of his heart to redeem himself for what he did; Kanon stopped to look like that shadow of a man. And Camus… Camus was back finally.

Milo still had no idea how to deal with that fact. At first the returning of the Aquarius made him turbulent. He couldn't sleep for a whole night, not knowing what he should feel. He was angry, really angry at Camus that he returned so late. That the Aquarius was hiding in the Siberia for these whole weeks when he, Milo needed him so much. And when everything started to look better, when his soul started to heal finally – he appeared in the Sanctuary. In the most convenient time. He had no idea why Camus returned right now. He could stay alone in that damn, cold climate after all. Camus still didn't tell him his reasons about it. And Milo actually had no need of knowing it. But when his mind accommodated to the sudden presence of someone who was missing in his life for past few weeks, the calmness fell. Camus once was his best friend, Milo always felt comfortable in the Aquarius' presence. And for him, someone who had always many strong emotions, who had the soft heart, everything Camus did after the rape wasn't enough to completely erase what he felt about Camus. The rape wasn't enough to erase the love he felt toward Kanon, so how it could be possible in Camus' case?

With a long sigh he sat at the bad.

It wasn't like he didn't expect it at all, but even so, he looked surprised at the sight before his eyes. Kanon, his former lover was sleeping quietly at the chair near his bed.

He frowned a little with a slight smile. When the Scorpio was falling asleep the Gemini wasn't here, like always leaving him as much space and freedom as it was possible. But Milo knew that Kanon was watching over him all the time. It could be even funny a little that the elder Saint was so overprotective about him, but Milo knew how much Kanon desired to help him. How much Kanon wanted to redeem himself, to show Milo his love and concern about the Scorpio's life. These past weeks the Gemini was the person caring about him much more than the others. Not like Mu or Alderbaran, or even this exquisite, Aphrodite didn't care about him at all, but Kanon was above them all. He was there, when Milo needed him, he wasn't there, when Milo had enough of his presence. Always ready to help – no matter if about giving his body for the content of the Scarlet Needle, or just to talk or be beside him. The Scorpio could feel at the boundary of his consciousness the gentle cosmo of Kanon, watching over him carefully, but not imposing.

And… Actually Kanon was slowly healing from his paranoia after Milo's second suicide attempt, he was slowly calming himself. Of course Milo knew that for a few days he refused even to sleep, all the time observing Milo from the distance. But when it seemed everything could be finally heading for the better, two things happened. Firstly, Saga forced from Milo some time to listen to the words of the elder Gemini. Thanks to the elder twin, Milo was able to free his frustration. But anyway, it upset him a little. And then, just after that, Camus returned, reminding Milo everything about the awful act of the rape.

The Scorpio knew that now Kanon was afraid he would try to kill himself once again. It wouldn't be surprising. Meeting face to face with a person who should be his best friend till the end of the world, with the person who should help him, but didn't do that could be fatal.

So, since that day Kanon again refused to sleep at night and even at the day. He was pushing himself past the limits of being healthy, he was pale, he had deep, purple shadows under his eyes, and sometimes he looked he was about to lost his consciousness. But it was certain he didn't care about his own health as long as Milo was safe. In some way this attitude touched Milo. At the beginning of their relationship, Kanon didn't look as the person who could care so much. Sometimes Milo really felt just like his property, a doll for his sexual content that would always be beside him. Now he changed. When he realized that Milo would be gone forever, he started to appreciate for Milo's presence in his life.

It was making Milo happy. Finally he seemed to be really important for the younger twin. It was only sad, that Kanon had to understand some things in such a painful for Milo way.

The Scorpio sighed again, stood up from the bed and delicately – just to not wake the exhausted man up – he covered the body of Kanon with a blanket. After a long look at his former lover he left his bedroom, wanting to have a long walk in that beautiful morning. He only got sure to sense Kanon's cosmo, if the Gemini would wake up. He wanted to send him message that everything was fine, so Kanon wouldn't be worried.

He left the Sacred Hills, intending to take a long walk, but he never expected to see something, that surely changed his life again – this time for the better.

Camus looked at the clear see in the front of his eyes, but he was too tired to appreciate the beautifulness of this sight. He even couldn't clearly hear the hum of the water, that was hitting the hard rocks of the cliff he was standing at. He had really restless night… Actually he had no night, fighting with his own self.

Everything because of Kanon.

It wasn't like everything was perfect right now; that it was easy, painless, and calm. It was difficult, sorrowful, and stormy. He could even say that being in the Siberia was better for his soul. It was better, because right now the fierce battle over his heart started for good. In the small hut there was no opponent for that awful darkness of him. It was slowly swallowing him, day by day. There was no one to resist. But now, when he was finally in the Sanctuary, day by day meeting Milo, someone he hurt because of that darkness, he was finding the strength. Real strength to fight back. Maybe it passed only a few days since he returned, but he could feel that. This desperation of it, yearning for his soul and not being able to swallow him completely. How he could give up now, when he had so much to do? When Milo gave him the last chance of atoning for his crimes? How could he allow that to swallow him? Milo survived something worse. Milo survived the rape; he survived the betrayal of his best friend. He even survived two attempts of the suicide. The Scorpio had the strength to remain alive, even if he tried two times to kill himself. But he survived. Maybe with the help of everyone, but he was there, alive, healthy… slowly healing his soul. So how he, Aquarius Camus could allow that darkness to destroy him, when his best friend was suffering something worse?

Of course, he was still trying to excuse himself a little. He was trying to blame that darkness of Hades; that darkness the King of the Underworld 'gave' him and Saga. He was stubbornly trying to excuse himself, his own self before his mind. That if there was not that, he would never left. That if his soul wasn't cursed, he would never hurt Milo.

But at the same time he knew, that he was just a bastrad; a selfish bastard, who thought he would have Milo for himself. Forever. That even if he would left, Milo would welcome him with open arms just the first moment he would be back in the Sanctuary. He was thinking he was hurt the most of them all – his best friend firstly jumped into his bed, and then said it meant nothing. That he still loved Kanon even after that rape.

Oh, how stupid he was. Being so selfish! It was just the worst humiliation for the proud name of the Gold Saint of Athena!

He knew that. He knew that all. That he failed. That he was selfish, pathetic, unworthy of wearing the Gold Cloth of the Aquarius. But right now Milo gave him the last chance. The Scorpio had the willingness to see how much Camus treasured his life; this fragile life that was about to disappear two times. And Camus wanted to use that chance. He was ready to fight with that darkness for the sake of Milo. He was ready to do everything for the Scorpio. Whatever Milo would like him to do, he would fulfill his wish without any hesitation.

But it wasn't easy. Not only because of the darkness, that stubbornly wanted to destroy him. Kanon wasn't making it easier as well. The first day, when Camus wanted to see Milo, it was like fighting with the wind. Kanon was all the time making awful comments about him every time Milo wasn't listening. He was really rude and harsh for the Aquarius. Camus could understand that. After all it was him, who was all the time beside Milo. It was the younger Gemini, trying to stop the Scorpio from the suicide, it was him refusing to sleep, being afraid all the time. Not Camus. And right now Kanon was afraid the French would hurt Milo again. So he was throwing at his younger fellow many harsh words; most of them were clearly meaning he shouldn't be here, he should disappear from the world, that he should stay in that damn, cold Siberia forever.

The Aquarius knew what he meant. That he wouldn't help Camus in redeeming himself, that he was his enemy more than friend. He had to do everything on his own. In some part of his mind Camus was also sure, that Kanon was testing him and his will of staying and helping Milo. He could see how strong the French's attitude was. It was good in some way. Camus had the opportunity to show Kanon how much he really wanted to stay.

But Kanon's words… They were painful. He had no right to complain, but they hurt a lot. They were pretty strong, showing him his stupidity and selfishness. These words were now hunting him all the time and he couldn't do anything about them. He couldn't, because he deserved.

This night was the worst, because last evening he went to see Kanon. For these whole days since his return he was preparing himself to do that, to go and see him. He wanted to apologize to Kanon as well, for leaving him alone with Milo. And he wanted to thank him pretty much for staying with the Scorpio all the time. For nursing him, taking care of him. Watching over him. In his endless selfishness he thought he should do that and Kanon should accept the apology and words of thanks. But Kanon only snorted and said:

"It is the damn time to apologize, Camus. But you should apologize to Milo every day for your stupidity. Not me. And you don't need to thank me. I did something what was natural to do for someone who cared."

He didn't have to say this last word with such an emphasis. Camus already knew that. But this answer of his elder fellow just engraved itself in his mind and was ringing inside his head for the whole night, not allowing him to sleep peacefully.

When Milo gave him the second chance, he had the hope it would be easier. Not redeeming himself, but being here. Now, after these few days he knew he was just blind. Something like that would never be easy. Not the fight between the darkness and his friend.

The other saints weren't making this any easier, too. When he descended from his temple to train and free his frustration, on his first day here, Shura sighed deeply, and half saluted the Aquarius, something very strange for the always protocol-attentive Capricorn Saint. He didn't saw Aiolos or Dohko, but Shaka, a close friend for him, just nodded his head and said nothing. His posture didn't changed, but Camus could clearly feel the Virgo Saint disappointment. Aiolia's reaction was more violent: The Leo Saint jumped on his throat and asked if he already apologized to the "arachnid". It didn't needed to be a genius to understand he was talking about Milo, given the fact they always used those stupid nicknames when talking about each other. After reassuring the hot headed Saint that he already asked for Milo's forgiveness, Aiolia just turned and disappeared, without any other word. Afrodite was on the Cancer Temple, and he looked at Camus with censuring eyes. Deathmask only smirked. He didn't saw Saga on his way down, and he suspected that or he was still recovering from Milo's scarlet needles or already died. Aldebaran was friendly as always, but he could notice the worry on his dark eyes and expression. And Mu never looked at him at all. He was fixing some clothes, and even after Camus' salute, the Aries still showed a cold behavior.

He sighed deeply, walking slowly at the edge of the cliff, after a long while noticing small silhouette standing near the place, when Kanon was locked by Saga many years ago.

Since that time it passed already some time but Sagastill couldn't believe how he was alive. That he could open his eyes, feel pain in his whole body, see the gray world and hear dull sounds. He still couldn't believe how he survived Milo's Needles. He was prepared to die back then, he was ready to sink into the eternal darkness because of the blood loss. And he should die. The moment when he was falling unconsciousness in the front of Milo he knew it was the last seconds for him. There should be nothing more for Gemini Saga.

But he was there, standing at the cliff, having a good view at the place when many years ago he locked his own twin, sentencing him for the shameful die. He was there, standing in the slight wind, hearing the hum of the water and looking at the gray sea that was ending at the horizon.

It was hard for him to come here. The poison of Milo was still present inside his body; the Scorpio didn't remove it after Saga fall unconsciousness. Why he should do that anyway? Saga was his nightmare, someone who caused him pain, who turned his life into the hell just because of his selfishness. For a few days he wasn't even able to stand up from his bed. Milo didn't hold back, he put his whole hate into the strikes, his full cosmo, so just after regaining his senses, his ability to feel… He was suffering the worst physical pain he could imagine. It wass not like he didn't deserve, but… He was disappointed he could feel it. He should be dead.

For these few days he was lying inside his bedroom, not able to move too freely. Only Kanon once looked inside the room. Saga didn't know if just to see if his elder twin finally died, or just to make sure he was alive, but after a short while he disappeared. Beside him no one even once came nor to ask how he felt neither to wish him to die. But it was the best. He could think finally over his every sin, he could think without anyone watching him, telling him what he should do. He could decide what to do next, without any advices of anyone.

He decided quicker that he was expecting. His mind calmed down finally, his heart as well the first moments when he finally directed his thoughts. The fact that he still didn't know if Milo had even the will to forgive him someday was complicating this a little, but he didn't care about the answer. Like he said to Kanon weeks ago – the forgiveness wasn't something he needed.

So, now he was standing there, feeling really calm, like there was nothing finally to be worried about.

He looked at the cave, where his twin found the trident years ago. It was really long time ago but he still could remember that awful laugh that filled the area, when he, Gold Saint of the Gemini was leaving the young boy alone. But also he could remember the hurt eyes of his twin, the eyes in the same color as the sea in the front of him, that were looking at him disappointed.

And after so many years he wasn't better person. Again in his selfish actions he made Kanon suffer. The younger man had really awful life, first as his shadow, as someone who wasn't worth even on living in the full glare of the sun. He was chased every time he looked outside of his hideout; he was treated like a trash. Shadow, nothing more. Then Kanon's own brother just left him here to die without even a blink of an eye. For many years after the war with Hades he was just like homeless dog, without anything to protect, whiteout anywhere to return. And when finally Kanon gained his 'family', his beloved boyfriend, fellows and Goddess he could protect, he, Saga again destroyed everything. He wouldn't be surprised, if Kanon heated him deeply right now. He had the right to do so.

Saga destroyed everything Kanon gained by his own strength. He destroyed his relationship with Milo, putting them three in that situation; he again put a shadow at the trust of the other Saints they were feeling toward Kanon. If the others would discover what happened, that he and Saga raped Milo, there would be any excuse. Controlled or not, everyone would again distrust the younger twin. No wonder Kanon didn't want to look at him…

But Saga didn't hurt only Kanon. Wanting to comfort himself, wanting to escape from that darkness of his heart he also hurt Milo and Camus. Just because he felt lonely, just because in the corner of his mind he thought Kanon was his property. That Kanon owed him something. He had no excuse for that. Being lonely wasn't enough to hurt three others person, to cause his younger fellow so much pain that it lead Milo to the suicide attempt. Yes, he never planned that, but if he wouldn't start anything, something like that would never happen. He should just let that darkness to consume him completely. In silence.

Now this whole pain he caused Milo, the guilt was tearing him apart. It was worse than this approaching darkness. It was even worse than this pain he felt after receiving Milo's needles.

He still could feel it; the burning pain in his body. His mind was in the state it wasn't troubling him too much, but Saga was aware he should just scream from the suffering of his flesh. He only felt sadness, that he never heard the answer form Milo. He was aware there was no forgiveness for him, but it would be better to hear that from Milo himself.

With a long sigh he moved his eyes form the Cape Sounion at his hands, where he was holding tightly the golden dagger. It was so similar to the blade he wanted to use against Athena when she was still a baby and which he bathed in her blood years later. It was a little ironical, but he wanted to do that by using this one, since the original dagger was lost already. It was the best way to deal with everything…

With a slight smile of someone who was standing at the scaffold, he raised his hand, strongly gasping the blade. He pointed it at his chest, at his beating heart that was counting down the last remaining seconds of his life; his hand didn't twitch even one millimeter by doing this. He decided already. There was no space for the hesitation or for the fear.

In the slight wind he heard his name shouted by someone, but maybe it was just his tired imagination.

With a strong push he pierced his chest, feeling like the cold blade was slowly coming through his heart. It wasn't painful; with the first moment when his hand started to point at his important organ he stopped to feel any pain. It was only cold. The blade was cold, the wind was cold, his body was cold. Even the blood that started to flow out of the wound and his mouth was cold. Like ice. Like death.

He didn't even notice when he kneeled down at the ground.

"Saga!" he heard again, when finally the blade was sunk into his body completely. Now he had only to pull it out, so the blood would be able to leave his body freely.

He took one trembling breathe, disturbed by the blood in his mouth. He wanted to pull the blade out of his body finally, when he pierced through his heart, but then someone's hand stopped him firmly. Slowly, Saga looked into the cold, blue eyes of Camus, that seemed to be surprised a little to see such a scene.

"No, Saga. Don't move it," ordered Camus, couldn't believe that Saga, once really kind and trustworthy Saint was able to do such an desperate act.

Saga snorted under his nose weakly, feeling like the blood was filling his lungs more and more. It was already difficult for him to breathe. He gasped his hand, trying to get rid of the dagger from his body, but Camus was strongly holding the weapon in its place.

"Go away, Camus…" Saga whispered quietly, still fighting stubbornly with Camus hand.

"Do you really think it is the best way to solve everything, Saga?" Camus growled angrily. Saga had no right to kill himself. Like he, Camus had no right to die. They still were obligated to redeem their sins before Milo.

He heard slight chuckle, coming out of Saga's mouth and the next moment the force pushed him away a few meters. He couldn't believe that Saga, having the blade piercing his heart had also enough strength to make even a weakest Galaxian Explosion.

Saga chuckled again and with his lips red from the blood, he smiled.

"Tell me, Camus, who would like such a monster to be alive?" he asked and with a strong move, he pulled the blade out of his chest.

The blood started to flow out of the body with a strong stream, tainting the clothes and dripping at the ground. It was leaving Saga's chest in the rhythm of the fading pulse of his heart. Saga could hear the nice hum of the water under the cliff that was hitting the stones with the every wave. It was so nice sound, nicer than ever before. It was calming his nerves, slowly singing the lullaby to his mind. He never ever thought that the water could make such a beautiful melody.

The dagger fell out of his hand and hit the ground with the metallic sound, but Saga didn't even notice it. He was mesmerized by the melody of the water, and he was barely feeling his strength leaving him slowly. There was only the hum of the water and the horizon for the whole while that seemed to be the eternity. And then were only the cold, blue depths of Camus' eyes, when he was lying on the lap of his younger fellow.

Saga could see the pink lips of the Aquarius that moved slightly, but he didn't hear the words. He could only feel the firm cosmo, trying to maintain his life until the proper help would come. But Saga had enough cosmo to push it back and allow the blood to leave him with the every beat of his weakening heart, to the point where was no way back.

'Heh, that's right. Who would want me to be alive…?'

The blue eyes disappeared. The calming lullaby of the water faded away as well the first moment his heart stopped.

The first step…

He couldn't believe his eyes.

The second step…

His heart couldn't believe in all these feelings.

The third step…

His mind couldn't understand…

Milo saw his nightmare some time ago. He didn't intend to meet him in the place like this. Not now. Not after just a few days when he almost killed him. Not so soon after Saga gave him such a pathetic excuse for his own actions. But he, led by the fate, appeared on that cliff the same day as him. It seemed the Gemini wasn't aware of the presence of his younger fellow, because he was only staring at the sea in the front of him.

Milo twitched, seeing Saga's thoughtful expression. Maybe he was still at the distant, but he could see the almost absent eyes, tightened lips, pale skin and sweated a little face. He couldn't move, many feelings just immobilized him instantly. He really didn't want to see that face for the first time he left Saga bleeding in his own hallway of the Scorpio Temple, but at the same time he felt the urgent twitch of his Needle. Like it wanted to strike this man again.

But before he could do anything, before he managed to allow his Needle to take control over him, he saw Saga raising his hand – hand gasped on the golden dagger, so similar to this one that sunk into Athena's throat years ago. After long and slow move the blade stopped, pointing at the beating heart of the Gemini, not leaving any doubts how it would end.

This time he really couldn't move. He was just too surprised to see that. Frozen by the expectation of the push.

And there it was. The dagger sunk into the chest of the man very easily, like there was no flesh or bones. It pierced the heart with such an easy, that it amazed even him, a Saint who himself almost wounded his own heart. He didn't make any sound, watching the Gemini killing himself; without anything he accepted the fact that soon after the blade sunk into the healthy heart, Camus appeared on the scene, trying to stop the elder man with very upset face. He didn't notice the Aquarius' presence, but right now it didn't have the matter for him. Only the silhouette, that now was kneeling on the ground, stubbornly trying to pull out the blade.

And without doing anything, without making a slight sound or even moving to prevent the death of the Gold Saint of Athena, he was only watching like Saga send away Camus with his Galaxian Explosion, like the elder man took care of the dagger in his chests and like he was slowly fading away, fighting with Camus even with his cosmo to not being rescued.

'Tell me, Camus, who would like such a monster to be alive?'

That phrase took Milo by surprise. He wanted Saga to be dead? It was hard to know. Wounded, yes. Hurt, without a doubt. But dead?

But looking inside Saga's dying eyes, he understood: Even when believing that everyone should have a second chance, Milo discovered that he could not forgive this man. Not yet, not ever. He understood Saga's motives to kill himself; these weren't too different from his own motives for his two anterior attempts. And he decided to respect the Gemini's decision.

Milo decided to let Saga free. He could choose how to die. Milo would not kill him, not anymore. And he would let the Gemini go. Without any regret.

Saga's expression turned calm. It looked like he, on his last moments, could feel Milo's cosmo, not forgiving him, but freeing his soul. If he had the strength to do so, he would smile. It was enough.

His body fell down at Camus' lap and after a short and really calm while the dark cosmo disappeared into the eternity, leaving the World of Living once again.

It was so quick and so quiet that for a few long moments it was still just like a dream, a hallucination, like it never happened. But the longer he was looking at the immovable body the more he was sure it happened. He only had to check, he only had to walk over there to see if Saga was really dead.

He slowly approached the two bodies, one living and second just dead, slowly being cooler and cooler in the slight wind of the sea.

"Tell me, Milo…" said Camus not even looking at him, still holding Saga's head and having strange expression on his face. "Do you want… Do you want me to die, like Saga? We both hurt you pretty much, I know it is painful for you to look at me… So… Would you feel better if I wasn't here? If I was here no more? Dead, cold? If my existence is causing you pain, should I die?"

It passed a few minutes before Milo was able to say something. He snorted only, regaining his ability to think rationally, to move rationally, to have the whole control over his body.

"Where is your attitude you showed me few days ago, huh? About wanting to be beside me, to redeem yourself? You don't want that anymore?"

Finally, after the long sigh, Camus looked at him. Milo couldn't read his expression, it was a little dark, but impenetrable.

"I want that, Milo. And like I said, I will do everything for you. Even die, if you want. So, I'm asking again. Would you feel better if I wouldn't exist anymore?"

Milo gulped. He was so confused. Few days ago he almost killed Saga with his own hand, but now he was feeling strange, looking at the Gemini's death. Few days ago he never would think that Camus would be back, wanting to be beside him. Now, when Camus asked about dying, for a long moment he didn't know what to say. Camus hurt him pretty much, but they were friends for so long time…

"Don't be ridiculous, Camus. You have no right to die now," he answered finally.

But this answer didn't change Camus' expression. It was still a little dark… Sad, maybe?

"Are you sad about him?" he asked the Aquarius, pointing at the calm face of Saga. "Do you pity him right now?" he had no idea why he asked these two questions. The words just slipped trough his mouth.

"Do you want to hear that he deserved to die?" instead of answering, Camus asked.

Milo gasped at this question. Did he…?

"I think he deserved to die by your hand, but not that way…" Camus answered, not waiting for Milo to say something.

"Huh?"

"He didn't deserve to die by the suicide. Because the fact he wanted to do that means he regretted."

Milo gasped his hands at these words. Now everything started to mix inside him. He couldn't tell what he should feel. He was confused more and more, and there was no help from anyone.

Anger…

Saga escaped from the consequences of his crimes.

Relief…

His worst nightmare was there no more.

Disappointment…

He would never have the chance to forgive.

Sadness…

They lost one of their fellows.

Happiness…

He was free.