Chapter 11

Say something. Anything.

Uncomfortable, Elena squirmed in her seat. How could things have become so awkward between her and Stefan? There had been a time when he was the only one she could bear around her. And now, all it took were ten minutes alone with him in a car, in absolute silence and she was actually considering jumping out of a moving vehicle.

"I'm really sorry I didn't call you," Elena said, unable to stand the quiet any longer. "But it only happened last night and with everything going on with Jenna−"

"What happened?" he asked, finally speaking.

"We had an accident. Jenna must have lost control of the wheel."

"Must have?"

Elena frowned. "The night's kind of a blur. But it was raining and dark, so it makes more sense that that's why we crashed."

"More sense than what?"

She shrugged, running a hand through her curls. "Never mind. Nothing. It was just a stupid accident."

He looked at her then for the first time since they'd left the house and there was something in his gaze she'd never seen before. It was only when he spoke again in an unusual hard voice that she knew what it was. Doubt...in her.

"And how does my brother fit into all of this?"

She forgot how to breath for a second.

"He told you," she said, trying to sound as convincing as she could. "He smelled my blood and followed the scent."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did he bother?"

"I don't know. You have to ask him."

"I'm asking you," Stefan snapped.

He never snapped at her.

"And I'm telling you I don't know."

That silence returned and Elena wouldn't be the one to break it again. She already regretted doing it the first time.

However, clearly, Stefan didn't feel the same. "You shouldn't have invited him in, Elena."

"He drove me home from the hospital."

"You could've said goodbye at the door."

"I didn't want to be rude."

Stefan huffed, shaking his head. "Rude? He's a psychopath, Elena! Who cares about being rude!"

"He's not a psychopath," she hissed before she could stop herself. She was just so sick of it. Sick of people judging Damon, writing him off as some unredeemable monster who should be put down as soon as possible. They never saw him for who he really was! They never looked beneath the surface! Small minded idiots!

A fire burst to life within her and with a start she realized something she should've realized a long time ago. Her heart had already made her choice between the brothers, whether her head liked it or not. Yes, Stefan loved her and yes, she loved him, but she loved Damon. And she could fool herself into believing it was just a crush or that it would pass, but that would be the biggest lie she'd ever tell herself, because deep down, she knew this was it. This was what her mother had told her about all those years ago. True love. And yes, there was a good chance Damon would never truly love her the way she loved him, but he did care about her. She'd felt it the night he'd saved her from Christian, the night he'd wrapped his arms around her on her birthday and that morning when he'd cooked for her and told her she was on his mind every night. He felt something for her and with Damon Salvatore, that was really as much as a girl could expect, wasn't it? It didn't matter, anyway. It was too late. She was irrevocably in love with him and there was no going back.

"You're defending him, Elena?" Stefan said, bringing her back to reality, a reality that had now changed in every way possible. Suddenly, she was no longer trapped in a car with a man she needed forgiveness from. She was trapped in a car with a man she needed to let go, so she could be with the man she was always meant to be with.

"Yes, I am," she said, everything suddenly crystal clear. "He's changed, Stefan."

"Killers like him never change!"

"Really, Ripper?"

Too mean, she thought, seeing Stefan close his eyes for a brief moment. She just really didn't like people talking smack about Damon. But she also didn't like seeing Stefan hurt, which was a problem, because she knew she was about to hurt him even more.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, softly placing her hand on his arm. "I shouldn't have said that."

"He's nothing like me."

"He's more like you than you realize."

Stefan shrugged her hand off. "No, he's not. When I killed, I lost control. I blacked out and became an animal, actually tearing my victims apart. That's why they called me The Ripper, Elena. But Damon−"

"Damon what?" she asked, not sure she wanted to know.

"Damon never loses control."

"And that's a bad thing?"

"Yes. When he kills, he's still very aware of what he's doing. He's still him. He seeks out his prey, always women, and he stalks them. He gets close to them, makes them fall for him and when he has them where he wants them, he kills them."

"He's not like that anymore," she said, determined not to run this time, not to let anyone change her mind.

"Oh, come on, Elena! He's stalking you right now!"

Elena glanced in the side mirror, seeing Damon's car right behind them.

"That's not his doing. That's all Jeremy."

When her brother had seen Damon's black, sleek car, he'd insisted on driving to the hospital in it and Damon had agreed all too eagerly.

"Wake up, Elena!" Stefan screamed. "He's playing you!"

"He's not playing me. I would know."

"No, you wouldn't! He's had over a century to master the skill of lying through his teeth! It's what he does! Don't fall for it!"

"Stefan−"

"I know you, sweetheart," he continued, softer. "You want to see the good in everyone and he picks up on that."

"No, he−"

"He'll try to wiggle his way into your life, Elena. He'll try to make you feel for him. He'll try to make you care. And once you do, once your guards are down, he'll kill you, just like the others."

"He won't."

"He will!"

"No."

"How do you know?"

"Because my guards have been down for a while now," she said, her voice soft and filled with guilt.

He didn't understand what she was trying to say, though. Or maybe he didn't want to understand.

"Then he's probably taking his time."

"No, Stefan."

"Elena, you don't know−"

"He saved me."

He frowned at that. "Last night? I thought it was just an accident."

"No. Not last night. With Christian."

His eyes widened. "But you said−"

"−that I escaped when he wasn't paying attention. I know."

"You lied?"

When he said it, she could almost see herself falling from the pedestal he'd put her on.

"I couldn't tell you."

"Why not?"

Swallowing hard, she whispered, "Because of what happened afterwards."

His Adam's apple bounced up and down a few times before he said in a grated voice, "You slept with him."

"No."

He sighed in relief.

"Not that night ."

The car sped up and suddenly she wondered why she was telling him this while he was driving. Time and place, remember. But she'd just had enough. She couldn't stand lying anymore. Not to Stefan. Not to Damon. Not to herself. Enough was enough. This ended right now.

"He compelled you," Stefan snarled.

"No, he didn't."

"Trust me, Elena, he did!" he screamed. "You would never act like this out of your own free will! He compelled you!"

"No, Stefan−"

"Don't worry, I'll kill him for what he did to you! I'll kill him and we'll get passed this! We'll be happy!"

"He didn't compel me."

His foot pressed down on the gas even harder. "Yes, he did! There's no other explanation!"

"You told me the necklace was filled with Vervain, right?" Elena continued against her better judgment. "How could he compel me, Stefan?"

"Maybe you forgot to put it on! All it takes is one second−"

"I was wearing the necklace."

"You can't be sure of that! Maybe−"

"You put it on me yourself," she said, her mouth dry. "I was definitely wearing it when−" she trailed off. He knew what she meant. No need to rub it in.

"I put it on?" he snarled, comprehension dawning on his face. "On your birthday?"

Her eyes dropped to her hands, a tear trickling down. "I'm so sorry, Stefan."

"No, you were with me on your birthday," he said, his voice thick. "And before the party you were with Caroline and afterwards you fell asleep in my room!"

"Yes, but−"

"Maybe he only compelled you into thinking you slept with him! He would do that, you know! To screw with my head! There's no other explanation!"

Denial's a powerful thing.

"It wasn't before the party," she said, her cheeks reddening. "Or after."

His brow furrowed confused so she added, "Lexi called you, remember. You left."

Denial can only do so much. Elena realized this when Stefan ran a red light, his nostrils flaring, his veiny eyes furiously glued to the road. The trees outside of her window turned into blurs and it felt like the car no longer touched ground.

Panicking, Elena checked the mirror again and saw Damon's car was still there, matching their speed. Which would be comforting if it wasn't for the fact that Jeremy was in his car with him.

"Stefan!" she cried. "Please, stop!"

"Stop?" he snarled. "Did you tell him to stop?"

No.

"I'm so sorry, Stefan!"

"Oh, you're sorry?" he mocked. "Well, I guess everything's OK then, huh!"

"I didn't mean to hurt you!"

"Then you shouldn't have fucked my brother!"

Another red light got ignored. A car missed them by an inch. Elena screamed, but Stefan just kept going.

"Stefan, please!"

"You destroyed us for a fuck, Elena!" he screamed.

"No, I−"

"No?" he growled. "You don't think I can actually forgive you, do you?"

"No, I don't."

"We could've had everything and you just threw it away for a one night−"

"I love him."

His brown eyes left the road and found hers, piercing them with a hurt, angry glare. And then he did something she hadn't seen coming. Not from a mile away.

He laughed. Really laughed.

"You love him?" he chuckled hysterically.

"Yes," she said, trying to keep the anger out of her voice. She had no right to be angry.

"Oh, Elena, please tell me you're kidding! You can't be that stupid!"

No right to get angry, she kept thinking like her own personal mantra.

"He'll use you until he gets bored!" Stefan continued, serious again. "And then he'll either leave or kill you!"

"No, he won't," she said confident.

He jerked at the wheel, making a sharp turn left. A very sharp turn left. Elena was flung against the door, her head hitting the window.

Damon's car did the same, so she could only assume Jeremy's head was bruised too at that point. That's when the anger fought its way to the surface. Hurting her was fine. Hurting Jeremy, however…

"Damn it, Stefan! Stop this car! Now!"

"He will never love you, Elena!" he said, ignoring her. "He's not capable of it!"

"I'll love enough for the both of us!" she screamed, her nails embedding themselves into her seat. "Now, pull the fucking car over!"

"Fine!"

Tires shrieked. Her body lurched forward. She could feel the seatbelt digging into her skin, painfully. But she figured it was better than feeling her head digging into the windshield.

Faster than she knew she could move, she unbuckled and hurried out of the car, her breakfast crawling up throat, her vision blurry as her mind raced. Stefan had almost killed her! Stefan!

The sound of an ambulance made her focus again and that's when she saw where she was. The hospital. At least he'd gotten her where she needed to be.

Another car came to a shrieking halt right in front of her. Damon got out of it, looking absolutely frantic as he grabbed Elena's chin and forced her eyes to his. His blue eyes calmed her down a little, but something inside of her was still boiling, still hurting.

"I'm fine," she lied, answering his unspoken question as she put her hands to his chest. "Really."

"Well, isn't that just adorable," Stefan snarled from beside them, his expression livid.

"You!" Damon snarled, letting go of Elena. "What the hell was that!"

"Don't worry," Stefan hissed. "Your whore is just fine."

Her heart ached at his cruel words, but when she saw the way Damon looked at her, the ache turned into an all-consuming heath.

"You told him?" Damon asked softly while Jeremy screamed at Stefan in the background for calling his sister a whore.

Elena smiled weakly, still feeling the aftermath of her death ride. "I couldn't lie anymore."

"So, what does this mean?"

"It means you were right," she whispered. "I'm yours."

Now, Elena had seen Damon smile before, but never like the way he smiled at her in that moment. His entire face just lid up and for a second she saw what Damon must've looked like as a kid. Happy. Carefree. Innocent.

His warm hand cupped the back of her neck, pushing her closer to him, to his lips. Her stomach tied in knots as she grabbed his leather jacket so hard her knuckles turned white. She was going to taste him again, feel him again and this time there would be no guilt underneath the lust. There would be love. So much love. And it wouldn't be a fleeting meeting in a parking lot or a library. She would go home with him, she would be with him. Forever.

However, forever was going to have to wait, because before his lips touched hers, he was slammed to the side, into a parked ambulance, leaving a huge Damon-shaped dent in the door.

"Oh, no," Elena hissed, looking around and spotting about a dozen spectators. Doctors and nurses taking a break, paramedics beginning their shifts, family of patients coming out for some air. Too many people for two vampires to be fighting in front of.

"Stefan, Damon, stop!" she yelled, starting towards them.

A hand grabbed her wrist. "Are you out of your mind?" Jeremy snarled. "Getting between two fighting vampires is never a good idea."

She pulled free, watching Damon slam his fist into Stefan's jaw. On the plus side, their faces were still very human. They knew they were being watched.

"Please, stop!" she cried again, her heart racing uncontrollably.

Damon hit the ground, Stefan on top of him, slamming his brother's head into the pavement over and over again.

"No, no, no," Elena mumbled, shaking her head a little too hard. Her eyes couldn't follow the quick movement, causing a splitting headache to crawl into her brain. "Just stop," she mumbled, her voice weaker.

Her heart started thumping even faster. Too fast. Frowning, she clutched her chest, actually feeling every beat radiate through her. Breathing became harder and at first, she still thought she was just panicking. But she knew that wasn't it. She'd panicked enough over the last few months to know what it felt like and this was different. This was worse.

Her hand dropped from her chest. Not that she'd decided to do so, but her arm had suddenly felt too heavy. Everything felt too heavy. Her head. Her legs. Her arms. Her eyelids.

Oh God, no. Not now.

"Damon?" was the last thing Elena uttered before everything shut down.

Right there, on that parking lot, while the Salvatores fought, Elena Gilbert died.

More chapters are coming! So, what did you think? Let me know! x LustAndLove