"Check mate."
Knives leaned back on hid hands, his face emotionless. Across from him, Jerry stared at him, mouth hanging open like a gate with loose hinges.
"N-not possible!" he stuttered.
Knives fixed him with a cool gaze and retrieved his sandwich off my lap. I looked at him fondly, quite pleased that he had beaten Jerry so soundly.
"You couldn't have won!" insisted Jerry.
Knives chewed slowly, watching Jerry with faint amusement and leaning his head against my legs. I patted the top of his head and watched with equal amusement.
"How did you do that?" demanded Jerry, wild-eyed.
Knives shrugged and smiled a charming smile. Jerry grumbled and settled back in his seat. Mrs. Watson looked between Jerry and Knives, mouth pursed slightly in a frown.
"Well," she said suddenly, standing up. "It was absolutely lovely to see you Janey and meet Tucker again. We really must do this again!"
She pulled Jerry to his feet and steered him toward the door. I got up as well, careful not to jostle Knives too much.
"Oh yes, always a pleasure," I replied smiling sweetly.
I handed them their coats. As Mrs. Watson pulled Jerry into his coat, Knives walked up behind me and wrapped an arm around my waist. He watched silently, his head leaning against my shoulder. I rubbed his shoulder, holding the door open for Mrs. Watson and Jerry.
"Well. Yes. Good to see you Janey, Tucker." Jerry glared at Knives with the last word. Knives grinned toothily at him.
"Nice to meet you, Sir! Thanks for the game!"
I saw Jerry's eye twitch. He opened his mouth, shut it, and spun on his heel, stomping out the door. Mrs. Watson chirped a quick good-bye and rushed after him as quickly as her bulk would allow. I watched their retreating forms for a moment and closed the door.
"You're a scamp," I informed Knives, giving him a hug. "What happened to leaving after saying hi?"
Knives turned his toothy grin on me.
"I couldn't resist. He was such a pompous little man."
I giggled and let go.
"I can't be mad at you. That look on his face was priceless."
"Does this mean you won't make me eat brussel sprouts tonight?"
I thought for moment.
"No, you don't have to eat brussel sprouts."
"All right!" Knives punched the air triumphantly.
"We'll have zucchini instead."
"JANEY!! NOT FAIR!"
--
"Knives! I'm home!"
I carefully shut the door behind me, dropping my bag on the floor. Knives poked his head though the family room door.
"Hi. How was work?"
"Fine," I said cuddling a little blanketed bundle to my chest. "Look."
Knives walked over and looked down at the bundle.
"…."
"Well?"
"… Congratulations, I didn't know you were pregnant."
"KNIVES!"
"What?"
I frowned at him, cuddling the baby girl to my chest.
"She's not mine."
"You're just adopting kids right and left aren't you?"
"Hardeehar, wise guy. Being twelve has given you a sense of humor."
Knives eyed the baby with distaste.
"Yeah yeah. So what is it?"
"She is a baby. Her name is Emma and she's the neighbor's daughter. I offered to watch her for the afternoon because Mrs. Norring needs to go to the doctor for a physical and didn't feel comfortable in bringing Emma."
"Oh." Knives' nose wrinkled. "You like helping people don't you?"
I glared at him.
"There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. And it'll be nice to have another girl around here."
"If you say so."
-Knives POV-
"It'll be nice to have another girl around here," I imitated in a high voice, flopping down on the couch. Janey was in the kitchen heating up a bottle for that pink little raisin. I scowled at the floor and bounced the heel of my sneaker off it a couple times. With a sigh, I reached over a grabbed the book I had been reading when Janey had come home and opened it.
I hadn't been reading long when the telephone rang. I ignored it and turned a page. Janey walked in, the infant balanced on one hip.
"Way to be helpful Knives."
"What," I said, not looking up from my book. "I don't exist remember. Unless Tucker's here to pick it up."
She rolled her eyes and picked up the phone.
"Hello?"
The pink blob gurgled at me. I stuck my tongue out at it and continued reading.
"Please tell me you're kidding. You can't have lost them! Do you know how long those took me? It's a good thing I made copies! You can come over here and pick them up. No I can't-… This is ridiculous! Arg, fine! I'll be right over!"
Janey hung up the phone vigorously and sighed.
"Knives."
"What," I replied, turning a page serenely.
"They lost my report."
"Oh dear.'
"I have to go bring them my copy because apparently they're too busy to send someone over."
"Okay."
"You have to watch Emma."
"What?" I yelled, dropping my book and leaping to my feet. "No!"
"Come on, Knives! I can't take her with me! It'll just be for 15 minutes okay?"
Janey shoved the baby into my arms.
"Just sit here and hold her! I'll be right back I promise."
I looked from the pink thing in my arms to Janey, who was rifling around in the desk drawers.
"But…"
"This is important Knives! They need that report! Just sit here and it'll be fine."
"Eeeeyeeeeeeeh…" I whimpered, giving her a pathetic expression.
Janey ruffled my hair.
"It'll be fine! Be right back!"
Without a look back, she ran out the door, a stack of papers clamped under one arm. I looked down at the pink interloper with a grimace. It gurgled and stuck a stubby appendage at me.
"Charming," I groaned and sat down on the couch again. I leaned the bundle against the crook of my arm, told it to behave and retrieved my book. I eyed it briefly, before flipping the book open to the proper place.
It was relatively quiet for a few minutes until suddenly, the thing hiccuped. A quick look revealed that it hadn't spit anything up, so I continued reading. The next hiccup was accompanied by a rather alarming gurgling noise.
"Keep quiet, Krakatoa," I growled, eyeing the little creature. It hiccuped again and started crying.
"Oh come on," I groaned. "Don't start!"
It wailed.
"Oouh…stop it, come on."
I picked it up and bounced it a little, patting it's back. It continued to cry.
"Would you stop it?" I pleaded. "Don't do this to me!"
Bouncec bounce. Cry cry. Pat pat. Wail wail.
And then with a giant hiccup, the noise stopped. Unfortunately, this was accompanied with a depositing of half digested milk on my shirt.
"Okay, that's completely disgusting," I scowled at the pink menace. "Why did Janey have to feed you before she left, huh?"
It blinked it's blue eyes at me and gurgled happily.
"Oh sure, now you're happy. After you completely messed up this shirt, which I happened to like a lot by the way."
Gurgle gurgle.
"What are you, a water bubbler? On second thought, don't answer that."
Gurgle gurgle.
"If you throw up again, I'm tossing you," I informed it sternly.
It responded by whacking me in the nose with one tiny fist.
"HEY!"
I looked at the signs. Screwed up face, opening mouth and a deep inhale to inflate those little lungs. Oh goody.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
"Oh be quiet," I signed wearily, and started bouncing again. A minute or two of this quieted the little brat back down.
"Listen," I said firmly, waving a finger. "Here's the deal. You sit quietly and go to sleep and I won't leave you on the curb for the trash collectors."
The thing grabbed my finger and started sucking on it. Ew. I was about to pull my finger away, but then decided it was plugging the sound hole. Best my finger stay where it was… I sighed deeply and flung my head back, staring at the ceiling.
"I hate babies."
Suck suck suck.
"They smell funny for one thing. Noisy for another."
Suck suck suck.
"And you messed up my shirt. This better not stain.'
Suck suck suck.
I looked back up and studied the bundle.
"Did you know that you're pink and have almost no hair?"
Suck suck suck.
"You probably didn't. You probably don't care either. And yet you'll probably grow up into a beautiful woman. If you're lucky."
Suck suck.
"….Does my finger taste good or something?"
Suck suck. Yawn. Suck suck.
I sighed and flopped my head back again.
We were in the same position when Janey made it back, except the little bundle of joy had fallen asleep with my finger in her mouth.
"Hey, I'm back," said Janey softly, sitting down next to me. "How'd it go?"
I looked over at her without picking up my head.
"It threw up on me."
"Aw, I'm sorry."
Janey rubbed my head. It felt rather nice.
"And it was sucking on my finger."
Janey smiled a little.
"You two look adorable together, you know that? Big brother and little sister."
I scowled at her.
"I don't want a sibling."
"You already have Vash."
"Vash isn't here."
She chuckled and ruffled my hair.
"Don't worry, you spoiled little boy. Emma's mom will be here in about an hour and you'll be an only child again."
With a smile, she gently picked up Emma so I could go change my shirt. I sighed and sat up, eyeing the mess.
"Will this stain?"
Janey shook her head, rocking the baby a little.
"Don't worry, I know just how to get it out. Just put it in the bathtub to soak for now, okay?"
I nodded and went to get changed.
When I came back, Janey was still sitting on the couch holding the pestilence. I scowled and picked up my book, sitting on the farthest side of the couch. I ignored the two of them and started reading again.
"Knives."
I turned a page.
"Knives."
"…What."
"Come here."
I looked over. Janey held out her free arm toward me, in an inviting gesture. I studied her for a minute and then scooted so that I was sitting next to her. With a smile she wrapped her arm around my shoulder and pulled me into a little hug.
"How's my baby boy?"
"Fine," I grumbled. "I'm not a baby."
"You're my baby," she teased tickling my ribs a little. I yelped and tried to move away, but she didn't let go. With a slightly exasperated sigh, I relaxed against her and opened my book. I felt her lean her chin against the top of my head, her breath ticking my hair a little. A tiny cough made me look over at the bundle. Big blue eyes stared at me and the little mouth spread into a smile.
I couldn't help it. I smiled back and settled more comfortably into Janey's motherly embrace.
--
That was fun to write :3
I don't own Trigun. Nightow does.