Happy Australia Day !
The next day in ThunderClan
"Firestar, what shall we do now?" Brambleclaw asked.
"I know," Firestar said. "We'll take the helicopter and go to Australia."
"What is Australia?" Ashfur asked.
"Australia is an awesome country," Firestar said. "They have koalas and kangaroos."
"How do you know?" Sandstorm asked.
"Don't you read Clan Cats Weekly?" Firestar asked.
"Umm no," Thornclaw replied.
"WELL YOU SHOULD," Firestar screamed at Thornclaw.
"Okay, let's go," Squirrelpaw said.
ThunderClan ran into the forest and into the helicopter. Graystripe was driving and Firestar was co-pilot (groan).
"To Australia," Firestar shouted as they lifted off.
Graystripe aimed the helicopter towards Australia. He pressed a button that said 'light speed'. The helicopter reached Australia in a matter of seconds.
Graystripe landed the helicopter. The ThunderClan cats ran out and went to the Sydney Opera House.
"G-day mate," a strange black cat said in his Aussie accent.
"Who are you?" Firestar asked.
"I'm Felix," Felix said.
"I'm Squirrelpaw," Squirrelpaw said. "This is Firestar, Graystripe, Sandstorm, Sorreltail, Brackenfur . . ."
"Cool," Felix interrupted. "Now, do you want to come watch the footy?"
"Footy?" Ashfur asked.
"Football," Felix explained.
"Okay, we'll come," Squirrelpaw decided.
Felix led ThunderClan through Sydney, until they came to the Sydney Football Stadium. "Here we are," Felix announced.
"What is that?" Ashfur asked.
"That is a barbecue," Felix explained. "The humans are cooking sausages. They are so good. I'm grabbing a sambo," Felix said, leaping up on the counter.
"What is a sambo?" Ashfur asked.
"A sandwich," Felix explained. "You're not from around here, are you?"
"No, we flew here in an aeroplane," Firestar said.
Graystripe rolled his eyes. "Firestar it was a helicopter."
"It was?" Firestar asked.
"Yes," Graystripe answered.
"Anyway, come watch the footy, mate," Felix said, "when you hear this stupidly loud horn, that means the footy is about to start."
So, ThunderClan found seats and watched the footy. The Twolegs were throwing a ball around and tackling each other. It was fun to watch. "Hey, since it is Australia day, want to come to my place for a barbecue?" Felix asked.
"Sure," Ashfur said. "What is Australia day?"
Felix sighed. "Why do I always have to get stuck with the loonies?" he muttered under his breath. Louder, he said "Australia day is when Australians celebrate the day the First Fleet landed in Botany Bay."
"First Fleet?" Squirrelflight asked, walking beside Scourgeclaw.
"Boats," Felix explained. "Now, do you want to come to my place?"
"YES," ThunderClan boomed.
"Follow me," Felix said. He led ThunderClan through Sydney to his house. "Here we are."
Felix's house was awesome! There was a barbecue going with Twolegs cooking heaps of fresh-kill. There was also a black tarp laid down a hill.
"What's with the tarp?" Scourgeclaw asked.
Felix rolled his eyes. "It's for a slide."
Ashfur's eyes widened. "Can we go on the slide?"
"NOT YET, YOU FURBALL," Felix shouted in frustration.
"Oh, okay," Ashfur said happily. He narrowed his eyes until they disappeared, "Why not?"
"It hasn't got water on it yet," Felix sighed, "or detergent."
"Detergent?" Ashfur asked.
"Never mind," Felix said. "You can go on it if you really want."
"YAY," Ashfur screamed, bounding to the slide. He ran down the hill and flopped on his belly, expecting to slide down the slide. He leapt up and jumped in the Twoleg pool. He sizzled. Ashfur climbed out, fur dripping. ThunderClan burst out laughing.
Ashfur looked down at his stomach. The slide had sizzled off all his fur. "DON'T LOOK AT ME!" he screamed, trying to hide behind a tree. "I'M NAKED!"
ThunderClan was laughing so hard that they rolled down the hill, then down the slide. "OHH HOT!" one cat exclaimed, leaping into the pool. All of ThunderClan bombed in the pool. Felix was sitting on the side of the pool, calmly washing a paw.
"Hey, you do know, you're all naked," Felix pointed out.
ThunderClan looked down. They all screamed. The screaming was so loud it woke up Tallstar, who is impossible to wake up. Firestar even jumped on him like a trampoline and he didn't wake up. Firestar really likes trampolines. There was this time . . .
Anyway, back to the story.
"Firestar what are we going to do," Squirrelflight asked Thornclaw, mistaking him for Firestar. "Firestar, where are you?"
Firestar didn't answer. "Hello, Firestar," Squirrelflight said. Firestar still didn't answer.
The Twoleg shouted something. "Ooh the burgers are ready," Felix said, preparing to run over to the barbecue.
"Wait," one of the naked cats called, I think it might have been Graystripe. "Do you have anything for us, to cover ourselves?"
"Wait right there," Felix said. He ran into the Twoleg house. He came back with a heap of clothing. He dumped it on the ground. "Take your pick."
The ThunderClan cats picked out some clothes to wear. Firestar, Graystripe, Thornclaw and Rainwhisker all wore singlets. Scourgeclaw wore a hoodie. All the she-cats wore pink shirts. But Ashfur was left with a pink and purple flower dress.
"Do I really have to wear this?" Ashfur asked.
"Yes you do," Squirrelflight answered, slamming the dress over Ashfur's head. "Blue is more my style," he complained.
"Well can you see a blue dress anywhere?" Squirrelflight asked.
"Yes," Ashfur replied. "Over there."
Squirrelflight picked up the blue dress that Ashfur wanted and put that on him too. "But now I have two," Ashfur complained.
"Come on you two, burgers are ready," Felix called.
"Burgers?" Ashfur asked.
"SHUT UP OR I'LL THROW YOU DOWN THE SLIDE!" Squirrelflight bellowed.
"NO, not the slide," Ashfur said, fur bristling, eyes widening.
"Yes, the slide," Squirrelflight confirmed.
"Come on Squirrelflight," Scourgeclaw called. "You'll miss out on burgers."
"Coming," Squirrelflight bolted, leaving Ashfur to scramble after her.
Squirrelflight grabbed a plate and lined up behind Scourgeclaw. "Go in front of me," he insisted.
"Thanks," Squirrelflight murmured. She held up her plate and the Twoleg put a huge piece of fresh-kill on it.
She took it over to Leafpaw and Cinderpelt. "Hey Cinderpelt, I think this burger is trying to say something," Leafpaw said, her ear pressed against the burger.
"What?" Cinderpelt said, snapping out of her daydream.
"It says, eat me," Leafpaw said.
"Well eat it then," Squirrelflight said, coming over with Scourgeclaw.
Leafpaw shoved her face into the burger. "It tastes so good," she mumbled.
"I don't know you," Squirrelflight said.
"Yes you do," Leafpaw pointed out, burger dripping off her lip.
Squirrelflight groaned. She ate her burger with Scourgeclaw. "Hey, it's time to play on the slide," Felix shouted.
ThunderClan groaned. "No, the humans pour water down it and the water cools it down." Felix explained.
Ashfur ripped off his dresses. "I bags going first," He screamed to the sky.
"MY EYES," Leafpaw squealed, covering her eyes.
"Put some clothes on, you stripper," Squirrelflight said.
"But I thought you liked my body," Ashfur whined.
"But I thought you said you were going first," Squirrelflight shot back.
Ashfur walked sadly up to the slide. "Good bye, my friends," he said.
"You had friends!" Squirrelflight exclaimed. "Who told him that?" she asked scanning the crowd of ThunderClan cats.
"My mummy did," Ashfur said protectively.
"Who is your mummy?" Squirrelflight asked.
"I don't know," Ashfur answered, getting ready to run down the hill. "I forgot."
ThunderClan and Felix burst out laughing at Ashfur for the second time that day. Ashfur ran down the hill and slid down the slide. The Twolegs had put detergent on the slide so Ashfur flew down the hill. He was going so fast, that he couldn't stop in time and crashed into a random tree that appeared at the bottom of the slide.
ThunderClan played on the slide until dinner time. "We had better be going," a cat, who I believe was Graystripe, said.
"Stay for dinner," Felix replied.
So ThunderClan stayed for dinner. "Geez this chicken is good," Squirrelflight commented to Scourgeclaw.
"It tastes just like mouse," Scourgeclaw agreed.
"We had better be going," Graystripe said again.
"Stay for the after party," Felix said.
So ThunderClan stayed for the after party. Soon everyone was asleep, well, except for Ashfur, who had drunk too much juice.
"You put your right paw in, you put your right paw out," he sung, swaying from side to side. "You turn around and . . . I forgot the rest!" he cried.
"We are going now," Graystripe commanded.
"To the lake," ThunderClan announced.
"Ashfur, we're going now," Graystripe said.
"Okay," Ashfur said. "Bye bye Squirrely."
"No Ashfur, I do not like you that way," Squirrelflight sighed.
"Quick, to the aeroplane," Firestar whispered.
"I'm coming with you guys," Felix said. "I've seen how fun Clan life is."
ThunderClan and Felix snuck away, leaving Ashfur behind. They went to the helicopter, which was also a plane and flew home. All the ThunderClan cats fell asleep except for Graystripe, who had drunk coffee to stay awake.
"Wake up ThunderClan," Graystripe said, after landing the helicopter.
ThunderClan didn't wake up but walked to their nests anyway. Graystripe rubbed his eyes, blamed the coffee and went to Firestar's nest, as Firestar had stolen his nest.
Why does Firestar like gates so much? Graystripe wondered, falling asleep in Firestar's lumpy donut nest.
Hawktalon,
Happy Australia Day peeps,
Any suggestions for crazy stories? Review please