A/N: So still on my Chuck and Blair later life kick. Don't want to give too much away, though. All will become clear.
Summary:
-- "Is it my fault that you attack me when I'm just standing in front of you in a dress?"
-- "That 'dress' as you call it would be considered by other women as lingerie. From La Perla."
Disclaimer: All characters and references come from the amazing world of GG. (All hail Chair.)
-- "As situations such as these usually go, this isn't that bad."
-- "And you've been in situations like these before."
-- "Only with you."
-- "Charming."
-- "Come on. This wasn't my fault."
-- "Your fault? This is completely your fault!"
-- "Explain that to me again."
-- "You just can't control yourself."
-- "You were on top of me, if you remember correctly."
-- "Which gave you the leverage to--"
-- "You're overreacting."
-- "I'm overreacting? You're the one who thought I had a concussion."
-- "Well you did land pretty awkwardly..."
-- "And I'm fine."
-- "Your arm isn't fine. It was practically sticking in the opposite direction."
-- "Well I did land on it pretty awkwardly."
-- "Hilarious. This wouldn't have happened if you weren't so damn insatiable."
-- "Don't change the subject, Bass. Is it my fault that you attack me when I'm just standing in front of you in a dress?"
-- "That 'dress' as you call it would be considered by other women as lingerie. From La Perla."
-- "And you are well acquainted with these women, are you?"
-- "I'm acquainted with you. And I'm just proving a point. You and your cleverly crafted schemes orchestrated that certain seduction and you know it."
-- "Thank you."
-- "..."
-- "Bass! Not here!"
-- "You weren't so opposing before."
-- "You mean right before you spun me off the bed?"
-- "No, after your x-ray."
-- "Oh. That."
-- "Yes, that. Your temporary amnesia seems to be wearing off now, doesn't it?"
-- "Well... that was just..."
-- "Me being irresistible."
-- "Don't hold yourself in such high regard."
-- "You used to be able to control yourself in public."
-- "And you used to be able to control yourself in the bedroom."
-- "That's debatable."
-- "No its not. When a person flings their beloved off their bed in a fit of passionate ecstasy, forcing them to ride their limo to the hospital, I definitely think that's something to debate."
-- "Really? If I were you I would consider that a compliment."
-- "The way the doctor did?"
-- "He was out of line."
-- "You can be an intimidating person, Bass. You were giving him the wrong impression to begin with."
-- "By being inquisitive about your injury--"
-- "That you caused."
-- "--Accidentally. Just because I was worried..."
-- "Possessive."
-- "Irrelevant. It wasn't like he had to call the nurses."
-- "He had a legitimate concern."
-- "Stop playing innocent, Waldorf. Its not funny. You know that I would never do that."
-- "But you did."
-- "Not on purpose. Its your fault your so lithe and limber. So..."
-- "..."
-- "..."
-- "Bass! What did I say about not here?"
-- "Normal people don't just fall off of beds like that, Blair."
-- "You would know. And I can't believe you're blaming me for spraining my wrist."
-- "Technically, you sprained your wrist. It was your momentum..."
-- "That you caused. You were the one who was overexcited."
-- "Oh, I'm not the only one, lover, trust me. There were definitely two of us in that bedroom."
-- "I didn't ask to land on my wrist during one of your fits of--"
-- "Ecstasy?"
-- "You're disgusting."
--"Well you were the one to be asked to be driven to the hospital. And who did that for you?"
-- "Arthur?"
-- "Sorry if I was too hazy to drive you anywhere. Maybe you should have taken a cab."
-- "Chuck, you don't even know how to drive. That's what you get for being pampered your whole life."
-- "Me? Who is the one who accepts the 35,000 dollar necklaces?"
-- "Its not like I asked you to get that for me."
-- "You weren't exactly reluctant, either. Or was that someone else who threw herself on top of me the night after she lost her virginity? To me."
-- "Don't act like you didn't enjoy every depraved second of it."
-- "I have no qualms with you being all over me. I rather enjoy it, actually. I do have qualms, however, with you blaming me on the account of a sprained wrist."
-- "I wasn't the only one."
-- "It was ridiculous for your doctor to assume I was an abusive sadist."
-- "When you walk in with your significant other the way you did after an injury, its hard not to be suspicious."
-- "You could have corrected him."
-- "You did that for me."
-- "It was necessary."
-- "You didn't have to yell out that it was the result of a sex injury so the whole ward could hear you."
-- "You weren't going to do it."
-- "I have a reputation to protect."
-- "That was shot to hell a long time ago. Especially with the four counts of public indecency."
-- "Not my fault you have an overactive libido."
-- "Is that so?"
-- "I wasn't the one who pulled a certain someone else into the bathroom at a four star restaurant."
-- "Again, you weren't that resistant. And I own the restaurant."
-- "That didn't stop the cops from detaining us."
-- "Like it mattered."
-- "It most definitely mattered. Both of our parents were in the other room."
-- "Lily didn't seem to mind."
-- "Lily isn't my father."
-- "And what is he going to do?"
-- "Not give me my trust fund?"
-- "You haven't had it before. I've been supporting you this whole time."
-- "I'm sure you were being very supportive when you accused me of having an affair with Humphrey."
-- "..."
-- "You overreacted."
-- "Only a little."
-- "A little? What do you call setting Georgina on him?"
-- "Fun."
-- "..."
-- "You think so too. I know you do."
-- "That... doesn't matter."
-- "Admit it. You can't resist my devilish charm."
-- "Devilish something."
-- "You're so attracted to me right now."
-- "Well that's going to stop."
-- "What have I done to deserve such treatment?"
-- "Vaulting me out of our bed, causing my blood work to have to be looked at."
-- "Well It turns out you're fine, so crisis averted."
-- "..."
-- "What?"
-- "I'm pregnant."
-- "..."
-- "Chuck?"
-- "..."
-- "..."
-- "Again?"
-- "And there's that charming support again."
-- "You're pregnant."
-- "Yes, Chuck."
-- "Again?"
-- "Yes, Chuck."
-- "Don't patronize me."
-- "Out of the two of us, I think I'm the one who has the right to be hormonally patronizing."
-- "Were you ever going to tell me?"
-- "I just found out."
-- "When?"
-- "Just now. Luckily we're so exploritive, otherwise I wouldn't have had to go to the hospitial for hitting the floor so hard."
-- "..."
-- "..."
-- "That's not funny."
-- "Forgive me."
-- "..."
-- "..."
-- "Always."
-- "..."
-- "You and your crafty seduction."
-- "I learned from the best. And from the person who put me in this position in the first place."
-- "..."
-- "..."
-- "In what position?"
-- "Shut up, Bass."
-- "..."
-- "..."
-- "Minx."