Wow, I really need to be more diligent. That was so not before New Years! Sorry for that, BTW =[ I really don't have a 'busy' excuse, I just lost the muses for a while. And I got sucked into the Star Trek 2009 fanfiction (man, this site is addicting!) But here we go, the next chapter! I hope it lives up to expectations…more questions? Finally some answers? Enjoy!

Disclaimer: nothing belongs to me

When Callen and Kensi walked into the bullpen, they were surprised to find it empty.

"Upstairs."

Both agents whirled around, relaxing at the sight of their operations manager. She really must have made an excellent agent, Kensi thought ruefully. Anyone who could move with such stealth must have been coveted by whatever agency they worked for.

They nodded and made their way up to the Ops Center.

XXX

Sam was standing next to Gibbs, with Tony and McGee on the older agent's other side. Nate was in his customary place in the wings, watching the proceedings with sharp eyes, observing only, not participating. Abby was bent over the computer with Eric, clearly in the midst of trying to figure something out.

All eyes, apart from the two computer geeks, turned to watch the last two agents arrive.

"Finally," Sam said, shifting slightly to give Callen and Kensi some room.

Nate watched the pair come to a rest, and his eyes narrowed slightly. He knew that something was off: it was in the too-careful way Kensi held herself and the tension that was clear in Callen's shoulders. Something had definitely happened, but neither one wanted to let the rest of the team know. He would need to have a talk with them in private when all this was over. Narrowing his focus as he saw Callen's jaw clench even tighter with Sam's comment, he amended that thought; perhaps he should speak to them as soon as this meeting was over.

Eric and Abby looked up and, seeing the final two agents join the group, moved forward.

Callen turned to Gibbs. "Nate said you had something?" he asked, not quite able to keep the stress out of his voice – though no one who did not know Callen very well would pick up on the emotion; indeed, only Gibbs, Kensi, and Sam seemed to notice anything.

Gibbs nodded towards the tech gurus; they had not quite joined the main group, and were standing close to the console in the center of the room. When Eric saw Callen's gaze shift towards him, he took it as a sign to begin. Pulling up several photos and documents, he focused on the screen in front of him, and all of the agents followed suit.

"After Agent Gibbs pointed me in the right direction, Abby and I decided to run with it," he started, falling easily into his element as he enlarged a specific photo.

Callen stiffened when he saw the image. He knew exactly when and how it was taken, and he sincerely wished he didn't. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Gibbs looking at him with something that looked suspiciously like sympathy in his eyes. No, not pity, more like understanding. Of course, he knew what it meant, too. On his other side, he could tell that Kensi saw the shift in demeanor, and move ever so slightly closer to him. He couldn't manage a smile, but he appreciated her efforts.

Eric obviously hadn't noticed anything, and he just plowed forward. "Operation Tachota," he continued, looking at the group of agents for a brief moment, seeing Kensi narrow her eyes and glance over to her husband, but he had no idea what that was about. He turned back to the screen and concentrated. "A joint task force between DEA, US Military, and Russian intelligence to shut down one of the largest drug rings in northern Russia." He put on a small cynical smile as he said sarcastically, "and judging from this picture, it didn't exactly go as planned."

"You could say that again," Callen murmured under his breath; only Kensi and Gibbs seemed to hear him.

"The task force was attacked at their base of operations, the day before the sting was supposed to go down. The attackers used military grade explosives to shake the camp up, and then moved in closer to finish the job; the guns were large caliber, meant to cause some serious damage." He looked down briefly, and swallowed. It was always hard to just read about incidents like this, but he had also seen all the pictures; it wasn't pretty. He felt Abby give his hand a squeeze, and he looked up, feeling slightly better. "There were twenty people in that camp. Four survived."

Tony was examining the horror on the screen in front of him; it was truly awful, smoke and fire, strewn bodies all over the place. The picture had clearly been taken from a military satellite. He saw the discomfort in his boss, and was slightly concerned with 'the great Leroy Jethro Gibbs' showing such an emotion, but he was more focused on an idea that had come to mind. "Do we know where those survivors are now?" he asked to general silence. Looking around, he could see expressions ranging from curiosity to irritation to anxiety. He hurried to explain, "If they remember something about that attack, it might lead us to some suspects. Clearly they were never caught, I mean, the similarities between that one and the one from a couple weeks ago is obvious!"

Gibbs interrupted him, voice calm, for all the worry he felt for the young man he had once thought of as a sort of son. "Duly noted, Agent DiNozzo, we'll look into it."

A moment of silence followed, where everyone save Callen and Kensi watched the older agent with confusion, but he did not elaborate.

Callen had yet to tear his gaze away from the screen, and the image of his friends on the ground, cold and pale in death. He didn't need to see a picture to remember that day: the fire of that morning was forever burned into his memory.

Kensi was watching her husband. She didn't think it was a good sign that he was looking at the screen so intently. She was certain he was currently caught up in the past, probably remembering the very incident that that picture depicted. She reached out subtly and grasped his hand, counting it as a good sign when she felt him return the pressure.

Eric coughed, and the attention turned back to the techie. This time it was Abby who spoke. She chose to look at the agents rather than the technology, and left the managing of the computer images to match her speech to Eric. Kensi, watching her, smiled in amusement of how animated the young goth was. It really was a startling contrast.

"So, we looked through all the Tachota info, but it really just led to dead ends, for the most part." Eric pulled up a file that had a few names and numbers on it, but nothing else. "We found this document, and once we had the code, it really wasn't that hard to figure out. I mean, seriously, if you're going to take the time to protect something with a code, shouldn't you actually make sure that-" Abby started off on what was sure to be a rampage of her opinion about people who couldn't even be bothered to protect something so trivial, but Gibbs cut her off.

"Bottom line, Abby?" he asked with the patience he rarely showed to anyone other than the forensic scientist.

Abby looked up, properly chastised. "Sorry, Gibbs," she said sheepishly, and then continued. "So, there wasn't much information in the document, but we managed to get a new lead. Operation Sulteen." She looked around the room, but only Gibbs, Callen, and Kensi reacted to the name. Everyone else just looked confused.

"What's Operation Sulteen?" McGee asked curiously, shifting forward with the scent of a new lead.

Abby and Eric shared a mutual glance. "We don't know," Abby admitted. "We tried to look into the government file, but, like, the whole thing is redacted. Literally."

Eric pulled up a digital copy of the file. It was little more than a page with multiple black lines running across its width. "Practically the only thing that isn't crossed out are the 'the's and the 'and's," he said ruefully. He glanced around the room and saw the glower Sam was throwing him. "We're still working on it," he tried to assure the agents, "But even I'm having a hard time finding a back door into this file. The only other thing I could find was a small note to the ending of the op, which concluded with the death of one agent, and another in critical condition. But seriously, I don't think it's going to get much better than that. Someone clearly doesn't want people to know what happened."

Had he still been looked at the computer, he would have missed the cynical twist to Callen's mouth, or the small snort he let out. Kensi was definitely looking at her husband with worry, and a spark of something else in her eyes. But he was a tech genius: he was great with computers, but severely lacked social skills, such as reading emotion in other people. Even so, he knew something was up, but he had no idea what it was.

"Is there anyone we can talk to about getting more info?" Sam asked to the room. He was looking specifically at Gibbs. "Hetty might know someone, and Vance could probably pull some strings."

Gibbs glanced briefly at the former SEAL, and then settled his gaze on Callen. He knew that the op was classified, and by all rights, he shouldn't even know about it. But he did. Because of one drunken night in a seedy bar in Moscow, he knew far too much. But try as he might, he couldn't find it in himself to be sorry. He wouldn't give back the relationship he and Callen had formed that evening for anything.

But Callen wasn't one for the rulebook, and if he wanted to tell his team about an op that he was a part of, he would do it, and damn the security clearance. So right now, it was up to him whether or not they shared anything about that hellhole of an operation.

Gibbs raised an eyebrow at the younger agent. Callen met his gaze, and Gibbs could see the inner turmoil in his eyes. He was clearly conflicted.

Callen knew the sentiment behind the stare his former mentor was leveling at him. Part of him would always regret taking Gibbs up on that post-mission offer of a drink. He had shared far too much that evening, but then again, so had Gibbs. Things had changed that day, for both of them. They had embarked on a lifelong friendship born of a mutual inner pain and self-hatred. And there was no going back. So as much as he regretted sharing so much of himself, he had to admit that what he had gained was far greater. Someone who actually cared about him, who wanted to help him, who would always be there for him; he had only ever had one other person go to such lengths before that, and she was dead. As much as he hated the fact, he couldn't change it, and he needed to focus on the future. And Gibbs was, from that night on, an undeniable part of his future.

"Hmm?" he asked, realizing that Kensi was trying to get his attention.

Kensi felt no urge to smile at her husband's lack of concentration. She recognized enough of the details from Eric's info session to understand Callen's position. She shifted slightly closer, and wrapped her arm around his waist. "You OK?" she whispered, trying not to draw attention.

Callen took a moment to focus, and then nodded. He threw out a reassuring smile, but he knew from Kensi's answering glare, it didn't achieve its desired effect.

Sam watched the exchange in confusion. He could tell something was wrong, but he had no idea what it was. And that thought definitely grated on his nerves more than it should: time was, he would be the only person to know what was up with Callen. Now it seemed that Kensi had taken that role. But he knew enough to know that, whatever it was, it was big. And personal. And then that just sent up red flags, because normally Callen just didn't do personal. Except with Kensi. Sam still couldn't wrap his brain around the fact that the two most emotionally screwed up people he knew had somehow managed to carve out a life together. And clearly, they were very happy.

Gibbs was still watching the LA senior field agent. He wasn't being obvious about it, but most of the people in the room noticed. They weren't special agents for nothing, after all. After a moment, Callen turned to look at his former mentor. That look had Gibbs reeling internally. There was so much hidden pain there, pain that he was certain only he could see. It was the pain of lost love, and not just a break up; it was the gut-wrenching agony of not being able to save the one you loved, of not being good enough to get there in time, of not being enough. Gibbs doubted anyone else in the room would be able to recognize that pain, because none of them had ever experienced it themselves.

As he watched, Callen made a serious effort to pull up the wall again; he knew Gibbs saw further into him than most, but that was no excuse to let that barrier fall as far as it had. He could tell that everyone else had noticed as well. Or at least, he knew that Sam had noticed. Strangely enough, that didn't bother him as much as it might have a year ago. He could almost imagine a future in which Sam knew everything; he could envision the same with Kensi, he had already envisioned that future with his wife. It was time and past to tell them. Everything.

Ohhhhh, cliffie! I know, I know, I'm sorry! But that seemed like a really good place to end, and I thought you'd appreciate an update! I don't really have plans when it comes to my writing, I just start and keep going until the chapter comes to a natural end, and that just seemed like the one. I'm sorry it took so long, too, I just haven't really been inspired to write lately. But I really don't have an excuse, I've got about three weeks left of break, and nothing but work to fill them-and I get paid to watch TV and surf the web, so I really have no excuse =] more will come, hopefully soon, but it's really not up to me, the muses have all the say!

Please review!