Secrets and Lullabies

Chapter Eleven: I'll Protect You

By Oblivious-Bystander

I had stared at her for awhile, eyeing her sudden change. Before, she was so confident and sure of herself but now, something changed. She hadn't said anything for a good minute or two, opening and closing her hands staring off into the past. Or, that's what I assumed.

Feeling selfish for growing inpatient, I pushed the feeling away and said again, "Who's Daniel?" a little too soft for my own ears.

She blinked, paused, tensed for a moment but didn't respond with words. She was lost it seemed, far away. But, I knew she had heard me.

So. I waited. I waited for her snap out of any memory she was in. I waited for her to return the present, to me, to the place I hope she knew she was safe.

It felt like I had sat there for an hour, watching her memorize her tile floor texture. When I couldn't wait any longer, I spoke again, loud and clear, "Who's Daniel" wincing a little at my tone.

Startled, snapping up in surprise, her eyes focused on mine in a daze. There was something there that I couldn't place, something dark and unforgiving.

Just when I was about to give up on the question, she shifted in her seat, cleared her throat and looked everywhere before, finally, locking eyes with me. She was beautiful. She was rich. She was real. She was exactly what I wanted her to be.

"He used to be my ex…" she began, delaying slightly at a hidden detail, "I met him through Trowa…in high school." Speaking so low I almost couldn't hear her, but one thing she said stuck out in my mind.

'Trowa…'

The name of my old friend made me tense. For some reason, jealousy overwhelmed me at the very simple word. There was something there I didn't know, that I wanted to know. Yet, I was afraid to know.

Continuing, gathering her jumbled thoughts, she straightened, "Trowa, Hilde, and I were all good friends in grade school. We were a trio, a gang of little trouble makers…" smiling lightly as she recalled the memories, "But, as time went on and we all…matured…we began to separate. Trowa joined a group of loud foulmouthed jocks while Hilde and I formed a group of our own consisting of just us two…

"Having known me for the majority of my life, when Trowa found out that Daniel showed…interest in me…he did what he could for a friend and set us up, combining out two groups into a cluster of teenagers with bad attitudes.

"When me, Hilde, and Trowa met, we all joined together because of one similarity. We didn't have a family. Hilde lost her parents in a car accident when she younger, Trowa never met them, and mine were lost in a house fire leaving me alone with my only relative, Milliardo, who, soon after meeting Daniel, disappeared and never came back…"

The beginning of her story surprised me. From her personality, she didn't seem like a troublemaker or someone who had lived their life alone. She seemed…very family oriented. I would never really have guessed her life to be as hard as it had been…It was somewhat of a shock.

"It was our senior year, we were graduating, Daniel had money, I believed I loved him, we moved in together, Hilde and I spoke less but still some, I only saw Trowa when he came to see Daniel and from what I knew he and Hilde hung out often. For the most part, after high school, my life revolved around Daniel"

She paused, letting out a breath I wasn't aware she had been holding. The truth was coming, I could tell and it took all of me to not just take her up in my arms and wash away it all. But, I knew, that couldn't be done. So, I waited for her to continue….patiently this time. Or, at least I tried.

After a few short moments, she saved me from having to wait, which was very much appreciated

"One day, I woke up alone… which was odd because I never woke up alone. Daniel was always there beside me, and he usually stayed there till noon to where I had to practically pull him out onto the floor to break him away from his dreams… But, he wasn't there and I couldn't find him. And, while searching for him, I found something else instead, his cell phone…

"He wasn't very strict on a lot of things but he was serious about that phone. You weren't allowed to look at it. You weren't allowed to go through you. You weren't allowed to use it, end of story. So, I got curious, not having a phone for myself and…went through it. All I found was someone else, a girl… That was when Daniel decided to walk in"

Unable to control myself, I leaned in closer, imagining her story, "What'd he do?" I could just see her, tangled from sleep, holding a phone in her small hands

Watching me a moment, sighing, she continued, "He tried to act like it didn't just happen. When I tried to find out who she was…he threw me down and dragged me down the hall by my hair and…"

Her pause didn't result with confusion. I had a good idea what she meant but something made me say it, "and?" I didn't want to guess, I wanted to know.

"And…he raped me. I don't understand what drove him to do it. I don't understand why he had a sudden change in heart but he did. Not too long after he left, Trowa and Hilde showed up to see Daniel and Hilde to surprise me. I, obviously, wasn't a pretty sight…

"…Either way, they got me out, moved me away and a month or so later…guess what…I'm pregnant"

Not seeing it before made me feel like an idiot. Of course that's where Josh came from, "Josh" He was a mistake…a rape mistake.

Not acknowledging I said anything, she continued, "I couldn't get rid of it. It was a part of me and…never really having a family of my own…I wanted it. And, somehow, over half way through the pregnancy, Daniel found out. He searched for me. He called the cops on me. He did everything in his power to find me and once…he did. Luckily enough, Trowa was there to kick his ass" smiling quietly at the thought.

"I don't understand" I heard myself say, "Trowa came here with Daniel a couple days ago. They seemed good friends" actually a little pissed about the face of it.

Nodding, she intertwined her fingers making a solid lock that no key could break, "It was a part of our plan… After I would have the baby, Hilde and I would move away to the colonies and Trowa would stay behind, stay friends with Daniel, and warn us if he ever got close to our location. But somewhere along the way, our communication was lost and his moving up here was an unpleasant surprise…as I'm sure you remember"

I did remember. I remembered it all, from her panicking at the table to jumping up and over the seat to escape him.

Watching her a moment, her fragile face and small frame, I tried to imagine just how hard it was to raise and care for a baby alone. It seemed about impossible. But, seeing Josh now, I knew she did something right. Even so, I was curious.

"How'd you do it?" glancing back to the hallway holding the pathway to little boy in question

"I…just…did, I guess" shrugging her shoulders, looking up in thought, "It was hard at first, caring for a newborn, getting a job that would allow me to bring him to work with me, getting enough money for an apartment, food, baby supplies. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life but…luckily Hilde was with me and she had a nice little trust fund for college that she never used…" chuckling softly

She was so strong, I couldn't believe it.

This woman, with sleep weighing down her figure, went through so much.

I didn't have any words to say.

But before I even thought about it, a single sentence slipped from my lips.

"I'll protect you"

And, all she did was nod in agreement.

I know this still isn't quite as long as normal but at least it's something. I've had this for awhile actually just had to revise it. So, I'm sorry for the unneeded wait. BUT! I kinda sorta skipped school today and have nothing to do so I'm thinking Ima write juuuuuust for you guys :) Or try anyway. I do believe i owe Never was, Isn't now, Never will I chapter? LETS GET TO IT!

R&R? Pwetty pwetty pwease? =]