I'll protect you, From Myself

Carlisle didn't seem very glad that my response was useless. I guess he was just looking for new information to stimulate over.

Alice pranced forward. "You're still special, Bella! Nobody can doubt that."

"Uh, thanks?" I murmured quietly.

She leaned forward and took my hand, all the while smiling. How could she be so ecstatic when I was feeling the total opposite? There was this fervent atmosphere that engulfed anyone whenever she was near. She was so petite and beautiful, I couldn't help but smile with her. I wanted some of the dosage she took to make her so cheerful. More like needed it.

"C'mon Bella. Let's get you settled in." She began tugging me towards the staircase. "You can have Edward's room, considering he never uses it."

I shot a glance at Edward, who was just standing there. Grinning. He didn't object to what Alice said, so I figured it was okay. I let her pull me along, until I paused in my tracks.

"What is it?" She looked at me, her face a little concerned.

"My things. I think I might have left my backpack in the forest." Oh no, Gianna's clothes she had set for me. They were probably being ransacked by a couple of pigs, or deers! I felt horrible.

She dismissed my worrying with her hand and rolled her eyes. "Don't worry about that. It just means we have an excuse to go shopping!" Her smile grew impossibly wider as she thought about it. I couldn't help but grimace.

We traveled all the way up to the third floor, and on the way I saw some very ancient photo's, hanging in elegant frames on the wall. I noticed some of the characters painted in them, but the places behind them were unfamiliar. I'm sure Alice got a bit irritated when I stopped at each picture to be amazed.

Finally we got to the the last room in the entire house.

His room must have the most breathtaking view I had ever witnessed. Just like most of the house, there was a wall-sized window that over looked the invincible forest and the sparkling river that we had just crossed a while ago. The mountains were much closer than I would have believed. A fraction of his room was entirely covered with shelves of CDs. He was probably better organized than a music store. There was an appealing black leather sofa against the eastern wall, and the floor was swathed in thick golden carpet which looked lovely alongside the slightly darker walls.

"Okay!" Alice clapped, her eyes fluttering around for something to do. Her gaze landed on me, and she scowled. "Ugh, we must get you out of that awful garment. What did they dress you in? A cotton rag? Repulsive."

I looked down at the dress Gianna had put on me. I couldn't find anything wrong about it besides the blood stains covering majority of the white material. It wasn't totally ravaged.

"Well I could retrieve my things-"

"Hush, hush!" She silenced, her voice abrupt. She headed back for the door. "I'll be right back."

And she disappeared only to reappear a second later. She was holding blue silk, and held it up for me to analyze. It was very pretty, but I hoped she wasn't actually thinking of making me wear it. It was too stylish for me to pull off.

She pursed her lips. "I think Rosalie wouldn't mind loaning a few of her outfits. Just until I have some time to go shopping for you."

I resisted the temptation to frown. "Look, this really isn't necessary."

"Of course it is, Bella. You must look beautiful everyday." She beamed. "It's part of being a Cullen." This time, I couldn't hold it in. Instantly she saw the change in my expression and flew over to hug me. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. It's just I missed you so much."

"It's okay," I giggled ironically. "My head is chaotically hectic at the moment. I just....don't know what to do anymore."

Her eyes were kind as she looked at me. "Don't worry Bella. Everything is going to be just fine, and we'll be back to normal."

She left the room silently. I didn't dress right away, instead I wondered over to the large glass and stared out into the distance. I didn't realize the different colors the forest could be. Colors I could never imagine. Even the olive fur of the tiny rodents lightened up the scene just a bit. This was what I had been missing all this time? There was no trace, absolutely no sign of any darkness anywhere. No dim color that eradicated the life here.

I turned away and walked over to the silk laying on the bed. I pressed it against my body and sighed. Alice was a delightful creature and she was going through too much trouble to make me comfortable.

I slid the ruined white dress of my body and replaced it with the wonderful attire. I had to admit, it felt great. It was a little flamboyant, revealing most of my skin, but it matched me perfectly. I hoped this would make her happy.

There was a light knock on the door. Expecting it to be Alice, I hurried over to open it.

"Oh!" I gasped. Edward's eyes were wide as he stared at the dress, or my body; what ever he was gaping at, it made me self-conscious. I staggered back a few steps and dropped my gaze to the floor. "I thought you were Alice. Sorry."

"No, don't apologize." I peered up at him, and he was smiling lovingly. "You look absolutely beautiful."

"Be reasonable," I laughed.

He grinned. "But I am."

We stared at each other for a long moment, and then I ripped my eyes away. I picked up the bloody dress from the floor and turned back to him, but he was already there. His scent overwhelmed me, and I could feel his sweet breath fan across my face. I didn't have time to think. My hands flew out protectively, and Edward went tumbling to the floor.

I stared-wide eyed and frozen-at him. I couldn't believe what I had done.

"Forgive me, I didn't mean to take you by surprise again." He murmured, and stood up swiftly. His eyes were pained, it made me want to cry. But I couldn't. I couldn't shed one tear of remorse for him.

He turned and walked out the door.

"Wait!" I shouted, running after him. "Please, wait!"

He whirled around and I fell into his chest, wrapping my arms around him. I had no experience with this sort of thing, but somewhere deep down, I knew I had to make things right. I knew what he wanted from me, and I couldn't give him that. All I could offer was my thoughts, my view on things.

"What's wrong, Bella?" His voice was shocked. He held me tight, probably relieved that I was actually making contact with him.

"I know you must feel so disappointed in me," I admitted, ruefully. "But I promise I won't ever hurt you again."

"Really?" He said, and I could hear the smile in his voice. He bent down to brush his lips against my hair so softly that I hardly felt it. "And I suppose you feel responsible for you're vanished memories?"

I looked up at him and nodded.

He chuckled. "Your human mannerism has remained, I see."