Chapter 11 More Then Friends

A/N Hi everyone thanks again for all your encouragement. I know some of you are frustrated by the pace that Thomas and Jimmy's relationship is progressing but I think given the time period and the consequences of such a relationship coupled with Jimmy's uncertainty about his sexuality, it would be unrealistic if he and Thomas became a couple without some reluctance on Jimmy's part. But I promise there will be further developments from here on out so try and be patient! Once again thanks to everyone for continuing to read and review.

Thomas woke to the sound of one of the hall boys banging on his door.

"Six o clock!"

Thomas groaned and rolled onto his stomach wishing more than anything that he could fall back asleep. With a jolt he remembered he had promised to check on Jimmy. He sprang out of bed and quickly got dressed it was only when he fastened the final button of his waistcoat that he realised he had left his jacket in Jimmy's room. He left his room and headed towards Jimmy's room. He nodded at Alfred as he passed him. Alfred gave him a suspicious glance when he saw him stop at Jimmy's door but he continued down to breakfast without comment.

Thomas was just raising his hand to knock when the door opened and he was face to face with Jimmy.

"Morning" said Jimmy, Thomas's jacket in his hand.

"You took the bandages off" said Thomas with some disappointment noticing the footman's damp hair and bandage free head.

"Well I had to wash the blood out of my hair or Carson would have skinned me alive. Anyway I thought you'd forgotten about me I've been up for an hour at least." He handed Thomas his jacket hoping he wouldn't notice he had slept with it on.

"You could have woken me" said Thomas shrugging into the sleeves sounding wincing slightly when he realised he was sounding like a sulking child.

"Don't pout" grinned Jimmy reaching forward to button up Thomas's jacket. "You're just sorry you can't boss me around anymore."

Thomas recovered himself and fixed Jimmy with his sternest look. "The last time I checked James I was your superior therefore I can boss you around as much as I want."

"Yes Mr Barrow" said Jimmy removing his hands from the under butler's uniform and offering a salute.

The two broke apart as Mr Carson rounded the corner and fixed them both with a glare. "Shouldn't you be getting to breakfast?"

"Yes Mr Carson" they chorused.

"I assume you have recovered James and there will no further sudden bouts of illness?"

James flushed slightly. "No Mr Carson. I'm fit as a fiddle."

"See that you stay that way or I will no choice but to reassess your promotion to first footman."

As soon as he was out of earshot Jimmy began cursing Carson hotly.

"Never mind him" said Thomas soothingly. "He's been in a bad mood since the dinner yesterday. The Cartwrights' have invited themselves back for Lady Edith's birthday next month and it's messed up his planning arrangements. Anyway let's go down to breakfast before there's nothing left".

Jimmy just nodded still sore about Carson's comments but silently followed the under butler downstairs.

….

"So, are you going to miss me?" Freddie asked gazing at Thomas through a haze of smoke. The two were standing in the yard Freddie who had finished packing was waiting for the Cartwrights' to finish their breakfast before they all departed.

"Well I can't deny I've enjoyed your company" said Thomas inhaling deeply from his cigarette.

"I should hope so. But still, I'll be back in a month. His Lordship tells me Lady Cartwright is quite taken with Lady Edith so who knows, maybe we'll be seeing a lot more of one another in the future".

Thomas gazed at Freddie in surprise. Had Freddie made this pronouncement a few days previous Thomas would have jumped with glee. But there was no denying there was something blossoming between him and Jimmy and he didn't want anything to come between them.

"I thought you'd had enough of me" said Thomas trying to gage whether Freddie was merely teasing.

Freddie took a step closer to Thomas. "Oh I don't think I could ever have enough of you Thomas".

Thomas gave him a searching look. Was this the same person who only yesterday had been trying to convince him Jimmy was in love with him?

Freddie seemed to guess his thinking. "Don't get me wrong, honestly I wish you and Jimmy the best of luck. But let's be realistic, he's new to all this it's going to take time for the two of you to have what we had. You may find secret glances and handholding will only get you so far. In a month's time you could be desperate for something… more."

Thomas gave Freddie a cold glare. "I can be very patient."

"So can I" smiled Freddie, "Especially for something I want."

He chuckled softly at Thomas's cool expression. Freddie gave him one last chaste kiss on the cheek as he left not before adding,

"I'll see you in a month."

…

The next week passed without much incident. Thomas and Jimmy had spoken no further about their almost kiss but Thomas still held out hope that something would happen. Jimmy definitely seemed to be testing his limits. He sat next to Thomas for almost every meal, they were regularly the last to leave the servants hall having spent the night laughing and talking and Jimmy had become more tactile. His fingers would graze Thomas's when he passed him the salt at dinner, their knees would touch under the table, but there was still a distance between them. As much as Jimmy longed to get closer to Thomas his past actions made him reluctant to. He couldn't think of one person (except for Thomas himself) who would stand up for Jimmy if the police came knocking. He wished they could go back to the night Jimmy had banged his head. He hadn't had time to think of everything that could go wrong. He needed to try and recreate that closeness, that rightness but he couldn't think of a way to do so without throwing himself down the stairs. He was sure if he and Thomas were alone again he would be able to find the courage to act. But he couldn't formulate a plan to get Thomas alone in his room that wouldn't be such an obvious invitation. And what if he couldn't do it? He didn't want to lose Thomas as a friend. There had to be some way of getting him alone and letting things happen naturally. The idea came to him that night when having settled at the piano he heard Mr Bates and Thomas arguing. Somehow something about stolen wine came into conversation which led Jimmy to formulate a plan.

….

The next night Jimmy was sitting at the table with Thomas playing cards. Almost everyone had gone to bed except for Mrs Patmore who was in the kitchen banging pots around trying to find where she had left her list of menus for the coming week.

"What's the matter with you?" asked Thomas. It was the third time he'd asked him that but Jimmy had shrugged the question off each time.

"Nothing" he replied for the third time.

"Well something's up. You're sweating bullets and you've lost the last three rounds which would usually mean you'd have stormed off in a huff by now."

Jimmy glared at him affronted "I don't storm off in a huff!"

"Oh yes you do" smirked Thomas. "You're an extremely poor loser."

Mrs Patmore, to Jimmy's relief, appeared to have found her menus and headed up to bed calling goodnight to the pair as she left.

Thomas threw down his cards. "I'm going out for a smoke" he made to stand up but Jimmy reached forward to take his hand.

"No don't"

"Why?" Thomas asked perplexed.

Jimmy lowered his voice glancing nervously around the room.

"I've got a surprise for you."

"What kind of surprise?" asked Thomas his interest piqued.

"I can't tell you here. It's up in my room. Come on up and I'll show you."

Jimmy rose and picked up his cards before heading to the stairs. He turned around when he reached the bottom step to see Thomas hadn't moved.

"Are you coming?"

Thomas stared back wordlessly twirling his unlit cigarette in his fingers. "Alright. As long as you let me smoke."

The pair headed up to Jimmy's room Thomas hesitating briefly in the doorway. Jimmy strolled quickly over to his dresser and opened the bottom drawer. He glanced back to see Thomas was still standing in the doorway and instructed him to come in and close the door. Thomas complied and walked further into the room. Jimmy reached into the back of the drawer and pulled out a bottle of wine.

"Where did you get that?" asked Thomas in surprise.

"Nicked it" grinned Jimmy triumphantly.

"You know Carson counts those bottles don't you?"

The grin slid comically from Jimmy's face and was replaced with a mask of horror.

"Should I put it back?" he asked nervously.

"Nah. I'll just tell him I miscounted last time I did inventory" said Thomas shrugging." Seems a shame to waste it now" he indicated that Jimmy should open it.

Jimmy pulled a bottle opener from his dresser and opened the wine offering the bottle to Thomas.

"I'm afraid I don't have any glasses."

"Never mind" said Thomas taking a large sip straight from the bottle before handing it back to Jimmy who took an equally large gulp.

"So what brought this on?" asked Thomas settling himself into Jimmy's desk chair, stretching out his legs and putting a cigarette to his mouth.

Jimmy took another sip from the bottle as he watched Thomas light his cigarette.

"Just felt like doing something nice."

"I didn't know you could be nice" said Thomas in mock surprise inhaling deeply on his cigarette.

"Occasionally" said Jimmy sarcastically.

"So it's not because you wanted to get me drunk?" asked Thomas jokingly raising an eyebrow suggestively.

Jimmy laughed hoping Thomas wouldn't notice his blush, because that was exactly Jimmy's intention. Or at least partly, he was trying to get himself drunk. His hope was the alcohol would loosen him up and maybe he could try and take things further.

Thomas noticed Jimmy's discomfort and worried maybe he'd gone too far. He stubbed out his cigarette and made to stand up.

"I should probably go"

Jimmy leapt up and gripped the under butler's arm.

"No! You can't go!"

Thomas stared at Jimmy, surprised by his reaction.

"I mean… you have to help me… destroy the evidence" Jimmy reached over to grab the bottle of wine which was still half full. He shook it for emphasis. "You can't go until it's empty" he sat back down on the bed pulling Thomas with him. "Friends don't let friends drink alone." Jimmy offered the bottle to a stunned Thomas who took it with a trembling hand and took another gulp.

"Well when you out it that way"

Jimmy grinned in triumph as he watched a drop of wine trickle from the corner of Thomas's mouth. Without thinking he lifted his hand and brushed the droplet with his thumb. He could feel Thomas freeze under his touch and he met his eyes warily. The two stared at each other silent for what felt like hours, Jimmy still with his hand on Thomas's chin. Just as Thomas was about to pull away he felt Jimmy crush his lips against his own. The kiss was brief and Jimmy pulled back slightly worried by Thomas unresponsiveness. He met Thomas eyes and leant in to kiss him once more. This time Thomas reacted more favourably. His lips parted slightly and he kissed Jimmy back fervently. Jimmy felt Thomas's hand snake around his waist pulling him closer. Their kiss deepened and Jimmy ran his hands over the older man's chest gripping his waistcoat and pulling him down to a lying position on Jimmy's bed. Thomas allowed himself to be pulled on top of the footman and felt his fingers loosen on the bottle of wine which was still clutched in his left hand.

The bottle fell to the floor with a bang causing the two to break apart. The pair were silent as they strained their ears and listened to see if anyone had been disturbed by the noise. After several seconds the house remained silent and Thomas let out a sigh of relief and bent down to retrieve the bottle which thankfully had not broken. But the interruption seemed to have broken the spell for Jimmy. Now that they were apart he could feel his doubts creeping in and though he was ashamed to admit it a part of him was disgusted by what they had done. Thomas glanced back at Jimmy and seemed to read it in his face.

"I should go" said Thomas for the second time that night, only this time Jimmy didn't try to stop him. He could see the hurt of his rejection in Thomas's eyes and wanted to get up and touch him or kiss him or give him some kind of reassurance but he couldn't. As Thomas smoothed his hair and adjusted his waistcoat he gave Jimmy one last sad smile before heading towards the door.

Jimmy watched him go and forced himself to speak up.

"Thomas"

The under butler paused with his hand on the door knob. He turned around to see Jimmy had risen from the bed but hadn't moved any closer.

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry"

Thomas could feel his eyes sting and turned back towards the door.

"I'm not saying no." continued Jimmy. "I'm just saying not now."

Thomas forced himself to turn around to face Jimmy and was mystified as he saw tears streaming down the footman's face.

"It's alright Jimmy. I can wait. For as long as it takes."

He desperately wanted to go to Jimmy, to embrace him and wipe away his tears but he knew Jimmy would not welcome it. So he turned and left the room.

Jimmy waited until the door clicked closed until he sat down heavily on the bed and put his face in his hands. His body shaking with silent sobs.