Disclaimer: If you don't know by now then you never will. Stephenie Meyer owns it all. I'm just having fun.

Chapter 10: SUSPICION

Bella POV

"Why not tell me now?" Edward was standing in the kitchen doorway with his hands on his hips and his eyes blazing.

"Excuse me?" I looked over at him. Jasper looked torn between anger and pain. I didn't know if either of those emotions were coming from Edward but after the night that he had put me through I wasn't sure that I cared.

"Why don't I leave you two alone?" Jasper stood.

"No don't" Edward told him. "It's clear that Bella would rather be with you than me. I would just appreciate you both tell me in private that there is something going on between you two then tomorrow in front of the whole family."

"WHAT?" I jumped up from the swing and looked at him. He had to be kidding.

"Although I'm a little surprised" He was staring at Jasper. "I was pretty sure you were a better man than that. What about Alice or are you planning on having your cake and eating it too?"

"Edward…" Jasper started but I cut him off.

"How dare you." I walked vampire speed up to him so that we were face to face. "You kiss me and then parade that blonde bitch in front of me all night long with her whispered words that everyone can hear and her insulting touches and you have the nerve to talk about someone else wanting there cake and eating it too.

"Bella it's not like that." He was looking at me now.

"Really Edward, how is it?" I crossed my arms. "Do the two of you just get together on occasion? Is she your Alaska girl? Are you both into other people too? Do you lure them in with that 'I haven't had that much experience with women' crap and then go running back to her when you feel the need? Please Edward, tell how it is?"

"There is nothing going on between Tanya and me."

"You can say anything you want to me Edward but don't lie." I was inches away from slapping him. "I saw the two of you tonight."

"That was all her" He explained.

"Sure it was" I shook my head. "Cause we all know how shy you are around women."

"Bella"

"What Edward?" I looked him right in the eye. "You tell me again how you haven't had any women up in your room? Or how about the one where you've never been in love? You really expect me to believe a word you say right now."

"Bella you have to"

"No I don't" I started. "I'm not the one that played all shy and cute. I'm not the one that lead you into thinking that there might be something going on here. That was you."

"There is something going on here." He reached for me but I moved out of his grasp.

"Yeah, between you and Tanya."

"That's not true."

"Really" I spit as much sarcasm into my voice as I could. "Then why did you take her out for a long romantic stroll? Is that why are you just getting back?"

"I took her out for a walk so that I could remind her that there was nothing going on between us and I'm not just getting back."

"What you two came back early for a little romp in your un-used room? Is she still up there now? Planning some all night fun?" I saw Jasper moving out the side of my eye and turned on him. "I swear Jasper if you leave me alone out here with him I will tear him apart and beat you with the pieces."

"Bella" Jasper moved backwards. "Maybe you should calm down a little.

"Your emotion control doesn't work on me or have you forgotten." I felt him trying to manipulate me.

"Just hopeful" He smiled tightly at me. "I've seen your temper."

"Of course you have" Edward jumped in. "You two share everything. I bet you probably know more about her than anyone." Edward was back to looking at Jasper. "I beat she even shared her past with you. Told you all about her life before becoming a vampire? Tell me, was that before or after you two ended up in bed?"

I was on top of him before I knew it. I knocked him down and grabbed at his arms fully intent on taking him down piece by piece.

I vaguely heard Jasper yell at someone to stay back and I felt his arms wrap around me and pull me off Edward. There was murder in my eyes and I knew it but how could he say such a mean thing to me. He hadn't cared for me at all. There was no way that he could have felt anything loving for me and then say such a hurtful thing.

Somewhere in my mind it registered that I was moving and I looked around to see trees flying by. I noticed that Jasper still had me by the waist and I was flung over his back.

"Put me down." I screamed.

"Not likely" He kept moving. "Not until you calm down."

"I am calm"

"Sure" Again no response accept that he picked up his speed. "That's why you're still screaming."

"Am not" I yelled but that only served to let me know that he was right. "I am not" I lowered my voice.

He laughed and kept running. I had no idea where we were headed and I just wanted to walk. "If I promise not to yell anymore will you please put me down?"

He stopped and placed me on my feet. "Thank you" I told him.

He looked at me and shook his head. "Bella what the hell were you thinking?" He sounded so upset. It brought me back to those days with Maria when he had been in charge of the newborns. He was Major Whitlock through and through. "With your training you could have killed him."

I closed my eyes and let my head fall back. "I know"

"Not just him but if any of the other had tried to interfere you would have attacked them to."

"I know" The shame washed over me. I hadn't meant to attack Edward. It had been a gut reaction brought on by years of conditioning. He hurt me so I had to hurt him. I knew it was wrong and Jasper had every right to be upset with me. I had ruined everything.

"Jasper I'm so sorry." I fell down on the ground with my face in my hands. "I was so wrong. What have I done?" His arms where around me and he was comforting me after what I had done, it was unbelievable. That only made my guilt double. "If you want me to leave I will."

"Come on Bella" He laughed. "What would I do without you to keep things interesting? Besides what did you tell me last time I had a slip; it's just one mistake in a sea of millions."

"That was different."

"How?" He asked.

"It was you" I tried and was rewarded with Jasper's laugh.

"See that is exactly why you can't leave." He rubbed my back. "I need that quick wit of yours to keep me grounded."

"Alice could do it."

"Alice isn't you." He pushed me away so that I could look in his face. "You're my family. You're the only family I have known for this whole existence. I need Alice but I need you too." I smiled. "So will you please stop talking about leaving? You and me, we're a pair got it."

"But a pair of what?" I smirked.

"Misfits to be sure, but still a pair." He hugged me to his side. "You go; I go."

"And Alice?"

"I would bet that she would also tag along." He squeezed my shoulder. "She seems to love you too."

I laughed. "Is that why she keeps trying to torture me?"

"No" He said. "That's why she keeps try to help. It's not her fault that you both see helping in different ways. Trust me her heart is in the right place."

"I know" and I did. Alice was a great sister and mother. She was better than my own had been. Not that I didn't love my mother but I had been such a daddy's girl and she had doted on her sons. It was like she only tolerated me knowing that one day I would be gone. With Alice even though I yelled and pushed she always came back. She stayed no matter what and that was what made her great. It's what made me love her also.

"They're going to be mad" I told him.

"Maybe"

"And we will have a lot of explaining to do. Maria, the south, and all that."

"Yep"

"Probably more now than we would have before."

"True"

"Edward might really be hurt."

"Yes"

"And Alice might have three heads."

"Doubtful" He looked at me strangely. "Why would you think that?"

"I don't but I was trying to see if you could say anything more than one word answers."

"Funny" He went back to the one word and smiled at me.

"Nice" I raised my eyebrows at him daring him to continue.

"Sure" He replied.

"I give up" I shook my head. "You win."

"Normal" He laughed and despite wanting to I laughed to. "We have to go back."

I breathed deeply. I knew he was right. It wouldn't be fair to just attack Edward and then not return to explain why. "Fine but do I have to tell them why I attacked him."

"Absolutely not" Jasper looked incensed. "If you were to repeat what he said I might have to attack him myself."

"Why didn't you?" Jasper had a faster temper than me and he could read emotions. I knew he couldn't read mine but Edward had been just as upset as I was so between his own anger and Edwards he should have bet me to the punch.

"What?" He stood.

"Why didn't you attack him?" I pushed him while standing myself. "Your temper is just as bad as mine if not worse. Combine that with Edward's anger and you should have moved before I did. But you stayed calm and got me out of there."

"I wasn't feeling angry." He looked around as if he didn't want to look at me.

"What were you feeling?"

"Don't make me tell you?" He whined.

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because it's not my emotion to tell" He was wiping the dirt with his toe.

"Whose is it?"

"Bella please" He still wouldn't look up. "This is between you and Edward. You know I would do anything for you but please don't make me tell you."

What could Edward have been feeling that Jasper wouldn't want to share and that stopped him from attacking? It wasn't anger which surprised me, but Jasper had said so himself. What other emotions are there when arguing with someone?

"Fine" I would ask Edward. That is if he would ever speak to me again. "You don't have to tell me."

"Thank you Bella" He looked up at me and the relief was so evident that it made me almost want to ask again. "Should we get going?"

I took one more look at him. "Yeah I guess so." I nodded. "It's not like it's going to get any easier if we wait."

"That's for sure" He started walking back. I moved to follow but was stopped by a strong piercing to my shield. It was as if someone was trying desperately to get in or to use it to hurt me somehow. I fell to my knees the pain was so strong.

"Bella?" Jasper was by my side in an instant. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know" I breathed. My head was pounding and my eyes were becoming unfocused. In all my years in battle I had never felt anything like this. "Jasper it hurts"

"What?" He questioned panic in his voice. "What hurts?"

"My head" I placed my hands up to ward off whatever was doing this. "Make it stop."

Jasper scooped me up and began racing back to the Cullens. I buried my head in his shoulder and let the wind whip around me. The further we moved away from wherever we had been the better I felt. By the time we reached the back porch my head was almost back to normal but that didn't stop Jasper.

"Carlisle" He yelled carrying me up to my room. "Carlisle we need help." I wasn't sure if they would come but before my body touched the bed every Cullen and Alice were crowded in.

"What happened?" I was surprised that the voice with worry was not Jasper or even Carlisle but Edward. He was beside me sitting on the bed with my hand in his. He didn't look mad at all just extremely concerned.

"I don't know" Jasper was shaking his head. "We were on our way back and Bella just collapsed. She said her head was hurting. I've never seen her in so much pain." Alice was by him holding his hand.

"She'll be okay Jasper" She whispered.

"Make her better." Jasper never took his eyes away from me and he looked so much like a little kid when he said that. I smiled up at him and tried to move but found I had three sets of hands on me; Carlisle, Jasper and Edward.

"Lie still and let Carlisle look at you." Edward ordered.

"I'm fine now." I made to move again but found that their hands had been joined by Emmett. I signed. There was no way I was moving now. I leaned back and rested against the pillows.

"Thank you" Edward spoke softly.

"Now Bella tell me what happened?" Carlisle was in full doctor mode.

"It was strange" I looked up at him. "I was about to start walking and I felt like someone or something was trying to penetrate my shield. I have felt it before but never to this magnitude. It was like something piercing into my skull. I couldn't move or breath or anything."

"And you've never experienced that before?" Carlisle eyes moved as if he was taking notes in his head.

"No" I shook my head. "At least not at that level. The other part was that the further we moved away from that spot the better I felt."

"I see" Again his eyes moved quickly back and forth. "Let me get my back and look you over although I don't think anything is wrong with you physically. I think someone was looking for a way through your shield and they found a weakness. It's just a question of if they know it or not."

"But who?" Edward asked and looked between Jasper and myself. "Who knows about her shield besides us here?"

I looked at Jasper and we both thought the same name. She had finally found us. We would have to leave. We couldn't put the Cullens in danger. Especially not after what I did tonight.

"Who's Maria?" Edward looked at Jasper then at me. "You've mentioned that name before." Damn, that first night. What had I been thinking?

"Not someone for you to worry about." I looked at Jasper and he was looking at me with his eyes narrowed. I closed my eyes trying to figure out how I could leave without the Cullens or Jasper following. He had found someone in Alice and I couldn't let him risk that love for me.

"I think she is" Edward had his hands cupping my face. "Especially if she tried to hurt you."

"It's not that simple" I opened my eyes and looked at him. "Some things never are."

"Then make it simple." He was staring back at me. "Because I am not about to let anyone hurt you."

He was staring at me so intently that I had to look around but somehow the room seemed to have cleared. There was no one there except for Edward and me. "Edward this isn't your fight."

"If this Maria person is trying to get to you then it is" He was shaking his head.

"You don't know what you're saying." He didn't know. He had never met anyone like Maria before. She was ruthless for no reason except that she was good at it. She would stop at nothing to kill me and Edward would just be collateral damage in her eyes. She would destroy him before he raised a hand to defend himself. She had decades of fight behind her and evil to boot.

"Bella" Edward pulled me back out of my mind. "I meant what I said earlier." He kissed my cheek. "I want to share everything with you and you are not alone anymore."

"For how long Edward?" I looked at him seriously. "A day, a week, a month? Until the next time Tanya feels lonely?"

"You have to believe me Bella" He looked so hurt. "There is nothing going on between Tanya and I and I'm so sorry for what I said. It was wrong and stupid and hurtful. My only defense is that I was hurting because you were leaning on Jasper for comfort when I wanted you to lean on me and I lashed out. Can you forgive me?"

He was asking for my forgiveness? I had attacked him and he thought he needed to apologize. And that was what he had been feeling? Hurt?

"Edward, I'm the one that should be asking for forgiveness." I told him. "I'm the one that attacked you."

"But you had reason; rightfully so." He leaned down so that our foreheads where touching. "I was just jealous. That's no excuse."

"You were jealous?"

"So jealous" He smiled that crooked smile that melted my dead heart. "I had been all night. I am every time I see you with Jasper. I get jealous and possessive and apparently stupid."

"But why?"

"Because he knows you" He answered. "He knows you in a way that you won't let me. You two have a bond that I can't touch. You have years of history with him and you won't share any of it."

His lips brushed mine. "But mostly because I love you and the idea of sharing you makes me a little crazy. How do I know that you and he haven't been involved before? You're so close. What's to stop you from becoming involved now? And I never want to lose you. It would hurt too much." His eyes drilled into me. "Bella you are my life now."

I looked up into those beautiful eyes and my wall crumbed to dust. I saw it. Right there in his eyes, in his touch, in his smile. He meant every word. But there was so much that I needed to tell him. So much that he needed to understand and if I was going to share then I needed to do it now.

"Can we go downstairs?" I moved to sit up.

"Right now?" He looked fallen.

"Yes right now." I held his hand. "There are some things Jasper and I need to tell you."

"I see" He dropped his head.

"No you don't" I raised it. "But you will."

AN: Alright ladies and gentleman. I hope you enjoyed and I hope that you have a wonderful Thanksgiving and eat until you're stuffed and happy. At least those are my plans. See you all next week and if you haven't gone out and seen the Twilight Saga: New Moon then take a little time to do it this weekend. You will be thankful that you did.

Don't make me blue; please review :)