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Ste was lying on his bed trying to sleep for the tenth time that day. Since Brendan had been away, he had tried calling and texting him to no avail he was not picking up his phone. All he wanted to do was talk to him and apologise.
All of a sudden Ste's phone went he did'nt bother looking at who was calling him
"Yeah"
"Hi" That's all that Brendan could say for the minute just hearing his voice was enough.
"Oh my god Bren. Where are you? Are you ok? Why the hell did you leave me?" Ste knew he was asking a lot of questions but he did'nt care.
"Stephen calm down yeah. I'm in Ireland, I'm fine and you know damn well why I left you lied to me, to my face after everything we have been through, you still don't fucking trust me" Brendan knew he was about to lose it he had to try and calm down, he took a quick gulp of whisky.
"Are you drinking"
"Yeah so at least I'm being honest with you"
"Look I know I was wrong, but you have to see it from my point of view. I was scared Bren I could'nt go through a whole court case with him sitting there, even with you in the room I could'nt I'm sorry" There was tears coming down Ste's face now he was trying to hide them from Bren.
Bren knew from the way Ste was talking he was crying and it was killing him because he could'nt be there to hold him even though he was angry with him he wanted to be close to him again "Stephen I would have been there with you at all times. I would have got you through it because do you know what that's what couples do they be there for each other through the bad and good"
Ste was getting angry now "THROUGH THE BAD AND GOOD YEAH. SO WHY THE HELL ARE'NT YOU WITH ME NOW IF THIS IS THE BAD SPELL EH"
Bren knew he was right "Listen calm down yeah. Ususally its me that's losing there cool and shouting. I was pissed Stephen. I mean if we don't have trust what the hell do we have yeah. That was a big thing for me especially after what we have been through"
Ste started getting upset again over the phone but he did'nt care if Bren heard him or not"You really have to ask that Bren what have we got. You are my best friend, my soul mate the love of my life. I love you more than anything on this planet. I fuck up one time and you run away"
"Hey hey listen to me ok. Please stop crying ok please. I should'nt have run away and I'm sorry but I was angry. Which I think I have every right to be.
Ste started to calm down "I know Bren ok I know and I'm sorry too. You did'nt have to run away though we could have sorted it out here at the time. Do you know how I felt when I went to you're door and Chez told me you'd gone and did'nt leave a note or anything for me. I really needed you Brendan, especially after coming straight from the hospital"
Bren sat there drinking his whisky for the first time what to do "Bren are you there? Bren?" he did'nt even ask how it went at the hospital "Yeah I'm still here what happened at the hospital are you ok?
Ste let out a big sigh "Yeah I'm fine. I really needed you though Bren. All I wanted you to do was hold me and make it all better. You make everything better"
Brendan started to get upset now "Ste listen to me ok. I know you needed me, but I had gone to a bad place. I did'nt want you to go there with me"
Ste could'nt believe what he was hearing "First of all we are partners Bren its my job to get you out of the bad place, you would'nt have been there that long trust me ok. Second don't ever call me Ste again, you are the only one that gets to call me Stephen and I like that fact"
Bren started laughing a bit "I thought you don't like to be called Stephen just Ste"
"I repeat I only like it when you call me Stephen, just you though noone else. God Bren I miss you so much, this could all have been sorted if you had stayed"
"Yeah I know that's what Declan said as well. I thought he'd be on my side, but the kid ended talking more sense that I could have done ever in my life"
Ste could'nt believe it "You talked to Declan about us"
"Yeah well the last time you phonned he tried to pick up the phone and talk to you I hung up. So he started to get nosey especially when I did'nt eat anything, he knew something was up then" Bren started telling Bren what Declan had said to him.
Ste started smiling then "Remember to give that kid a big hug and a kiss the next time I see him"
Brendan smile began to fade a little "Just remember you are with an old kit who you love more than anyone that would gladly take that kiss and hug any day"
Ste loved it Bren could be jealous of anyone even his own son "Yeah well you are'nt here to give it too are you? Bren were going to be ok yeah?"
"I'm still mad Stephen. I know why you did it and maybe I will understand it one day, but at the minute I don't ok. I think we will be fine though as long as you start being honest with me and trusting me"
Ste thanked god "I promise it will be different I promise I promise"
Bren started to relax a lot more and poured himself another drink "Ok then"
Ste could'nt believe what Bren was doing "I can't believe we are pouring our heart out to each other and you are pouring yourself another drink. How much have you had anyway? I don't just mean tonight?"
Brendan could'nt believe what he was hearing "We are miles away from each other and you still know when I am having a drink or not. Anyway I have had a trying week give a man a break"
Ste gave a small laugh "Hey you are not the only one who has had a trying week ok. So when are you going to be home?tonight?" Ste knew it was wishfull thinking.
"I will be home in a few days promise. I quite liking spending time with Dec anyway I just can't leave him here" Brendan wanting nothing more than to be home with Stephen, but he could'nt just leave Dec like that.
"Yeah I know" Ste tried to hide a yawn "So what have you been up to with him then"
"Listen I will phone you tommorrow and I will tell you everything then ok, you are struckling to stay awake. Now get a good nights sleep and I will phone you tommorrow ok" Bren was already making plans in his head.
"You promise you will phone promise"
"I promise now go to sleep"
"Ok Bren I love you"
"Yeah yeah why would'nt you. See you later"
"You could say it back you know"
"Goodnight Stephen"
"Night love you"
NEXT DAY HOLLYOAKS
Ste had just finished putting the kids to bed and was relaxing in front of the tele with Amy.
Amy was pleased that everything was ok between Ste and Brendan now. She knew it would be a while before they got back to normal, but what was normal for them anyway."So is Bren phonning you tonight"
Ste let out a sigh "Yeah he's meant too. If he does or not is another matter"
Amy tried not to smile so much "What do you mean by that Ste he said he would phone you"
"It's 7.30 Ames and I have'nt heard from him all day" Ste knew he seemed ungratefull but he just needed to hear Bren's voice. He had stopped himself so many times today in picking up the phone and trying to call him"
Amy was about to say something when Ste's phone went. Ste quickly picked it up "Bren. Oh hey Chez. What oh right ok ok no that's fine I will be there in 10 minutes ok"
"Everythink ok"
"Chez needs my help I need to go won't be long though" Ste grabbed his jacket and keys and left.
"I think you might be longer than expected Ste" Suddenly there was a knock at the door "Hey come on in"
Ste had just arrived at Chez door. He was about to knock but the door was already opened "Hey Chez its me. Do you know its quite dangerous leaving the door opened like that I could be anyone" Ste had entered the flat a liitle more.
"Yeah well you're not just anyone are you" Bren quietly closed the door behind Stephen.
"Brendan oh my god" Ste quickly ran up to Brendan and gave him the best kiss they have ever had.
Brendan was a little speechless but was able to say "Well that was a good welcome home. I should go away more often if thats the welcome home I get"
"Don't even think about it. I'm not letting you out of my sight ever again. Oh my god I can't believe you're here I thought you would'nt be home for a few days"
"Yeah well change of plans. Any objections"
"No. Wait a minute where's Chez she phonned me to come over"
"Staying with Amy tonight. We have the house to ourselves. Think of the fun we could have" Brendan gave Ste that knowing look.
"Oh is that right then, so they both know you were coming home before I did.
"It's what they call a surprise Stephen" Brendan tugged on Stephen's hand and led him to his room.
They both undressed never taking there gaze away from each other at any time. Ste was a bit worried still about his scarring but not as much with Brendan with him. They both quietly got into bed.
"Bren. I do want to you know that its just" Ste could'nt finished and looked away.
Bren took Ste head and moved his head so he could look at Bren "Ste I am not forcing you ok. When it happens it will happen ok, but it does'nt mean we can't sleep together or better yet make out"
"You can be real sweet sometimes you know that. It's one of the reasons I love you so much"
"Yeah well don't get used it, and don't tell anyone. I love you. Now go to sleep"
Ste smiled at Bren "Bren about us making out a lot. I think we could do with some practice with that"
"You do huh"
When Ste was kissing and holding Brendan he knew without a doubt they would both be ok. As long as they were together they could get through anything.
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