Disclaimer: I don't own The Rocky Horror Picture Show.
A/N: This chapter isn't very good. Hopefully it's good enough for my lovely reviewers.
Dr. Scott- that is, Uncle Everett- was supposed to 'give me away' since I don't really have a dad. That was a bit strange, since he was my husband-to-be's uncle.
Whatever.
So, he led me up the aisle. Since he's in a wheelchair this was kind of awkward. I had to carry the bouquet in one hand and have my other arm be limp by my side so that he could hold onto it.
I tried to avoid looking at the people sitting in the church, because I didn't know any of them. Most of them looked like Janet or Brad with small variation in hair color and/or skin tone. They smiled, though I wasn't sure if it was out of manners or because the actually wanted to be there. I think normal people like weddings. Staring at my feet, I didn't look at them.
When I got to the altar I finally looked up. There stood Eddie looking nicer than usual in a suit, Riffraff scowling, my two bridesmaids, and an older man who I assumed to be the priest.
"Mawage! Mawage is what bwing us togeder today. Mawage, that blessed dweam within a dweam within a dweam!" the priest began.
"Ve don't vant you making speeches," Dr. Scott hissed.
People giggled. At least they weren't giggling at me…
"Where is the ring?" the priest asked.
The priest's strange accent had disappeared. Must've been an act.
We stood there in silence for a minute.
"Eddie? Did you lose it?" Dr. Scott whispered, clearly very annoyed.
"I thought you were supposed to keep track of it! It's got actual diamonds on it," Eddie replied just as quietly.
After a moment, Dr. Scott found the box with the ring in his jacket pocket. "You vere right. Now let's just get on with things!"
"Do you, Columbia, take this nice boy, Edward D. Scott, to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
"I do," I said, smiling.
"Do you, Eddie Scott, take this girl wearing a pretty dress, named Columbia, to be your lawfully wedded wife?"
"I do."
"I pronounce you man and wife! You may now kiss the bride and then eat lots of cake at a reception-"
Eddie and I kissed a sweet, romantic kiss.
"-And I think they're going to have little tea sandwiches with cucumber, which sound lovely, and then-"
"Shut up," Riffraff muttered, kicking the priest's shoe.
Though he looked rather offended, the priest stopped talking.
Seconds after we exited the church, a camera guy Eddie's uncle had hired appeared.
"So, let's get a nice picture of the happy couple," he said.
Everyone but Eddie and I moved away from the church steps… except for Magenta.
The cameraman cleared his throat. "I meant the bride and groom."
Then she finally took the hint.
After that many more pictures were taken. Even Riff was in a few (though he glared evilly at the camera). Finally, they wanted a picture of…
"Now, the bride and her bridesmaids," said the cameraman.
I had a feeling that this would be one of the few photos Magenta would want a copy of, so I decided to do something that might amuse her. Just before the picture was taken I pulled down the top of my dress for a second.
After that, we (Eddie, Magenta, Janet, and I) got in Janet's car. I made Magenta sit in the front, so that Eddie and I could sit next to each other. We were supposed to go to the reception then.
They'd refused to tell me where the reception was.
"How long will it take to drive there?" I asked.
"Not long," Janet replied cheerfully.
"They didn't tell me either, if that makes anything better," said my new husband.
What a lovely word! Husband! I had a husband! Now I was Mrs. Edward Scott, not Columbia the Groupie. Though my new name was somewhat boring it seemed more normal. More grown up. Not everything would be different, though. Mrs. Edward Scott would dye her hair like Columbia the Groupie did. If she ever had the time...
"We're here," Janet said.
The car ride, I realized, had been very short. My eyes widened when I realized where we were.
"The castle? A party of earthlings at the old castle owned by Transylvanians?" I shrieked.
Magenta laughed. "Where else could we have the party? You two met here!"
"The party is in the ballroom," Janet elaborated.
The four of us walked into the house and through the foyer. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed that Janet seemed a bit jumpy. Of course, the only two times she'd been here very strange things had happened.
We entered the ballroom. It looked very different.
Where Frank's throne used to be someone had set up a table of all sorts of food. Nearby was the 'bar', from which alcohol was being supplied. A few tables were set up for people to sit at.
Music was playing from an old record player in the corner. To my amusement the song playing appeared to be the Time Warp played, by a sweeping theatrical orchestra, at a very slow tempo.
The guests all look familiar, thankfully.
Brad was awkwardly trying to chat with Riffraff, while Dr. Scott was near the record player watching everyone else with narrow eyes.
Janet's friend Betty Hapschatt was sitting in one of the chairs, holding 3-month-old Rosaline. Somehow, Betty had become our default babysitter. I guess being friends with ordinary, respectable earthlings comes in handy. Anyway, I think Betty wanted to practice being a mother (since she's currently pregnant).
"Ze bride und groom are here!" Dr. Scott exclaimed, when he saw us.
"And the bridesmaids," Betty added with a nervous laugh.
Magenta went over to stand by her brother and Janet went to her husband.
"Bride and groom get the first dance," Janet said sweetly.
We all stood there in silence.
"Er, how does one slow-dance the Time Warp?" I asked after a moment.
More silence.
"Riffraff," Magenta said, just barely loud enough for me to hear from across the room.
"Hmm?"
"Time to turn that music on!"
He walked over to the wall, near the food table, and opened up a panel. After he clicked at a few buttons music began to play out of the walls. Dr. Scott turned off the record player.
...And then we all danced.
Well, everyone except for wheelchair-bound professor, the baby, and the frightened looking babysitter.
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