Disclaimer:

I don't own anything from MI-5/Spooks, or NCIS. This is just a story made for my amusement, and hopefully all of yours as well. This will mostly revolve around the NCIS universe, with strong elements from MI-5. There will small elements from Nancy Drew: Silent Spy (which I don't own, disclaimer here), but just bits of the storyline from the game, no actual characters from Nancy Drew will be present.)

Summary:

Kelly Gibbs is very much alive, but she has miles of baggage she is carrying, and the ever present danger nipping at her heels.

Pairings:

Evelyn(Kelly)/Lucas North

Gibbs/?

Tony/Ziva

Abby/McGee

Warnings:

Mentions of Torture, PTSD, Violence, Language, and Sexual Situation and brief mention of drug use

This is NOT the same as The Girl in Memory. It will share the same basic plotline, and have some similar parts, but it IS a different story entirely.

Thank you Ants nz, Calista Mason, Cavill, Curiouser-and-Curiouser101, DS2010, Fantasyfictionwriter, FourHorses, JrSnape, Lady Isabelle Black, MDDC26, Mary Artemis, RedEyedSurprise, Rianna Hunter, ShadowGuardianAngel, Sir-Tannin, SpecialAgentLeonie, Stars2008, TehyaRiddick, adrienmaciel, andrewjeeves, Soccergirl0388, aprilalvinsmith, craftygirl26, joe bob billy bob, jrfan2383, Okaloosa, skeeter88, tammy henson, thedudewithoutaname, x-xLittle-Miss-Brown-Eyesx-x, and xLyraCharlottex for the follows!

Thank you 1956JohnDeere50, Alexstarlight18, BurnedSpy, Calista Mason, Curiouser-and-Curiouser101, EisForElephant, JrSnape, PeachfacedLovebird, RedEyedSurprise, SpecialAgentLeonie, adrienmaciel, andrewjeeves, coffeee, doggy bye, lightningx94, ljcolic, ros9172, skeeter88, smilin steph, tammy henson, thedudewithoutaname, winterhail, joe bob billy bob, and xLyraCharlottex for the favs!

I would like to also like to thank 'Children of Gibbs' to adding me to their community. That made my day.

And a special thanks to the reviewers, BurnedSpy, DS2010, and tammy henson! Thank you all so much! I really appreciate it.

Guest Reviews: *none at this time*

"Eyes on Fire" by Blue Foundation really inspires when it comes to the relationship between Evelyn and Lucas, and the potential destruction of it all.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

"A Night to Call It a Draw"

SOME nights, he could escape. He close his eyes and shut the world out. Tonight was not one of those nights. Lucas had seen Evelyn to her house, and only left when he was certain that she was alright. He stared up at his ceiling as the shadows crept in, and his chest tightened in panic. He could not hide from the memories tonight. It was so quiet that he swore he heard the faint whisper of his screams, the memories of a cloth being tied around his face and the ice cold water poured on him stealing his breath. He had come to terms with his eight years in prison, he knew that it would leave scars on him for the rest of his life. It fractured his ability to trust his team, for Connie James a woman he considered a friend had sold him out. It fractured his ability to be able to trust himself, for Arkady Kachimov had broken him mentally and physically in ways that were unimaginable.

The degradation and humiliation and loss of himself was something he had tried so hard to recover from. He thought that once he returned to MI-5, if he picked up the pieces of his life by getting back into the job and trying to go back to his ex-wife, he would be able to do so. It hadn't worked. Harry had constantly called in his loyalty into question, and Elizabeta was a mess he wouldn't even get into. He had tried to move on with Sarah Caulfield, a CIA agent, but she turned out to be a reflection of Arkady. She was a traitor to not only her country, but she had betrayed him as well. Sometimes he wished she had just killed him. It would have been easy than having everything he built up, his confidence, his faith in himself tore apart once more.

The only consolation he had was that he was finally able to confront his demons, and put Arkady to death. But facing ones demons did not mean, they would go away. He let out a shaky breath as he kicked off his blankets and walked over to his window. He pulled the curtain off to the side, and looked at the house. He saw the light on in the distance like a beacon, and it appeared that he was not the only one that was not getting any sleep tonight. Evelyn Matthews was a conundrum that he wasn't sure he could figure out without losing himself completely.

Here she was, a woman with ties to the Russian government and mob by extension, who had managed to create an entire new life for herself with none truly the wiser. If Fornell had never seen here in that office, she would still be hidden. And yet, deep his heart he wanted to trust her. Every fiber of his being wanted him to trust her, but his mind…his mind just wouldn't allow it. He could not trust her only for her to end up being betrayed again. His stared at the light in the distance with a stark look in his blue eyes, after everything he had been through the mere fact that a wisp of a woman could shake him so should be laughable.

But he wasn't laughing.

SUNLIGHT poured down through the trees with leaves that were just turning orange and brown, and Evelyn had a look of serenity on her face. The last few nights sleep had trouble finding her, but this morning a sense of peace feel over her. Sorrow lived and breathed within her memories, but when the sun rose that morning for some reason they didn't feel so bad. With a cup of coffee to give her a caffeine boost, she had moved her canvas out onto the porch and painted. She put everything she had felt the last few days into the painting, only stopping for a sip of coffee ever so often and a bite of Oreos. Can't have black coffee without Oreos, she thought with a half of a smile.

A breeze drifted up from the lake, and the water rippled. Evelyn painted, leaning forward on her stool to swept a great bold stroke of red through the shades of blue and greens. A stroke of chaos through the serenity, and she let out a long sigh as she looked at the painting through her wide framed glasses that hung on the tip of her nose. She only needed them when painting, the rest of the time she was fine without them.

"You are good." Evelyn nearly fell off her stool, and would have if two hands hadn't caught her. She startled, twisting around to find Lucas standing beside her. He had a guilty expression on his face. "I am sorry. I should have said something, I didn't mean to startle you," Lucas said, and he slowly released her when she was standing on her own two feet.

"Ah, don't apologize," Evelyn brushed a stray hair behind her ear with a half smile on her face. "It really doesn't take much to startle me these days. Half the time I'm afraid of my own shadow." Ain't that the truth, she thought, with a self-deprecating smile. "What are you doing here, if you don't mind my asking?" She asked, setting her paint brushed down and using a rag to wipe the excess paint from the tips of her fingers.

"I came to check on you," Lucas said, with a shrug of his shoulders and he shoved his hands in his jacket pockets in an effort not to reach out and touch her. The urge startled him, and he couldn't seem to make it go away. There was something about how she seemed to effortlessly draw the light towards her, and she seemed to glow underneath the sun.

Evelyn stared at him for a long moment, because words failed her. How long had it been since she felt that someone actually cared? "Well as you can see I'm fit as a fiddle, but thank you I appreciate it," she said, as she put the caps on her paints so they didn't dry out. "Do you want some coffee? I can go make you a cup," Evelyn offered, with a faint smile over her shoulder.

"No thank you," Lucas declined, politely. "Can't say that I care much for coffee. It's so bitter, and adding cream and sugar just doesn't seem to help."

"That's right. You British are fond of your tea, if I do recall," Evelyn smiled, teasingly. It felt nice to feel relaxed enough around another person to do so. "Or is that just a stereotype?"

"It's true and a stereotype," Lucas chuckled. "I do miss my tea. The stuff you Americans call tea is appalling, no offense."

"None taken," Evelyn said, with a light laugh. She tossed a cloth over her painting it, and hiding it from view before she turned towards Lucas with a half smile. "Hello. Think I forgot to say that," Evie said, shoving her hands into her jean pockets. When she was nervous she would fidget, and she put them in her pockets in order to keep herself still.

"Hello," Lucas responded, with a genially incline of his head. "I didn't say it either. It appears we both have questionable manners."

"Oh, well, we can't have that now, can we," Evelyn said, biting back a grin. "Do you want…to stay for breakfast?" She offered, a bit nervous. "I can make a mean omelet though I warn you there is half a chance it will turn into scrambled eggs. I am not the most patient of cooks."

"Ah, thanks," Lucas rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "But I'm afraid I have some errands to attend to so I'm afraid that breakfast will have to be a rain check."

Evelyn felt a little disappointed, though there was a bit of relief as well. Perhaps she was pushing herself to be better faster than she should, but she just wanted to be normal again. To let go of all the fear and let the scars heal and live again. "A rain check then," she said, softly. "Well, I shouldn't keep you from your errands."

"Yeah," Lucas agreed. "I really need to get going."

"See you later then," Evelyn went to turn around when she found her hand encased in another. She jolted, and looked down at Lucas's hand with wide eyes. Oh, hands were a weakness of hers. His longer powerful fingers held herself so gently like she was made of porcelain and glass. She drew in a shaky breath, and raised her gaze towards Lucas who stared at her imploringly.

"Are you…are you truly alright?" Lucas inquired, earnestly.

Evelyn stared at him for a long moment before her shoulder slumped. "Yes, I'm alright," Evie said, her voice a soft whisper. "You know you didn't have to check on me."

"I wanted to," Lucas let her hand slip out of his and his hand stayed there in the air for a split second before he let it fall to his side. "I wanted to check on you and see for myself that you were alright."

A surprised flush spread across her face. "Oh…" She murmured, in slight shock. "Thank you…" she breathed out, then her flush turned darkly. "I mean, I really appreciate that and for coming to get me. Thank you."

"You are more than welcome," he said, and the way he said it was like syrup on a pancake. Warm and rich and flowing. If anyone could fall in love with a voice it would be his, and Evelyn felt a bit absurd when the thought hit her. "I best be going," he said, and the moment was broken. "I guess this is goodbye."

"Oh, I hate goodbyes. They are so final," Evelyn said, before she meant to. Though it was true, she realized. She did hate goodbyes in any form. It meant the end of something, implying that one could never truly go back. She gotten so tired of all the goodbyes she had to make. She didn't want to make anymore. She gnawed on her bottom lip, nervously because once she said those words she had no way of taking them back.

Lucas was only taken aback for a second before a slight smile split his face. "Then perhaps not goodbye then," he said, softly. "Perhaps…see you later?" He ventured carefully.

A relieved smile split Evelyn's face. "I like that," she said, with a small nod. "See you later, Lucas North."

"See you later, Evelyn Matthews."

Dreams plagued Gibbs. Good dreams. Bad ones. All revolving around Kelly and Shannon. Over and over crime scene photos ran through his mind, or he was sitting at the diner with Kelly when he had something important to remember. He never remembered, and every time he awake with a frustrated feeling as if he had just lost something all over again. He pinched the bridge of his nose, and let out a long sigh as his words on his paperwork swam before his eyes. He need another coffee and it was only ten in the morning. He barely suppressed a groan when Evelyn came to a halt in front of his desk, and stood there silently with her arms crossed over her chest. Gibbs counted from a hundred until he couldn't ignore her anymore and looked up at her. "Is there something you needed, Matthews?" Gibbs asked, gruffly.

"Okay, look," Evie crossed her arms over her chest. "I realize that everyone thinks you are this force of nature, and when you are like this that everyone should stay out of your way. I'm not like everyone else, and I know that all the scowly and bad attitude is because some thing is bothering you. And I'm not leaving until you tell me what is wrong."

"Matthews," Gibbs glared.

"Save the Gibbs Glare Stare for someone who will cower beneath it," Evelyn stated, dismissively. She looked up at him, her gaze unwavering and her expression one of steel. She wasn't immune to the glare, but her concern for Gibbs outweighed any fear. "Now, Gibbs, what is going on?"

Gibbs opened his mouth to tell her to get back to her desk when Tony slammed his phone into the cradle and jumped to his feet. "Finally, a case! We got a dead Marine." He nearly shouted. "Thank goodness…" he trialed off when Gibbs shot him a look. "Not that thank goodness that a Marine is dead, I have the utmost respect for Marines as you well know, boss." Tony cleared his throat. "I was just going stir crazy sitting here."

"Stir crazy?" Ziva said, dryly. "Honestly, it has only been one week since our last one."

"Gear up," Gibbs told them.

Evelyn went to go do the same when Gibbs stopped her. "Uh-uh!" Gibbs grabbed her by the shoulder with one hand, and grabbed Tony's computer chair with the other and rolled it right in front of her. "Not you Matthews. You stay here," Gibbs said, and forced her to sit down in the chair.

Evelyn blinked, her face scrunched up in bemusement. "What? Wait, why?" She asked, looking up at him with a slight glare on her face.

"Because you aren't cleared for field duty," Gibbs said, with a small smirk on his face. "In case you forgotten, it was only a week ago you were almost frozen."

"Yes, I remember that." Evelyn had honestly tried not to count down the days. It would be only two more weeks that she was on Gibbs's team, then her three months were up. She didn't think she would stick with being a field agent if she wasn't with the team. It just wouldn't be the same. "Hey! Hey," her eyes narrowed on him accusingly, "you were almost turned into a popsicle along with me! Why do you get to be on field duty and I don't?"

Gibbs braced his hands on both armrest, and leaned down so Evelyn had to lean back. "Because, Matthews, it isn't my second time being severely injured on a case within in the time span of what? Two and a half months? You continue on this rate and there won't be anything left of you by the end of the year," Gibbs said, with a pointed look.

Evelyn pursed her lips, and narrowed her eyes at him. "That isn't the reason that you are cleared for field duty," said Evelyn, stubbornly. "You probably scared everyone into signing all the paperwork. Gave them the Gibbs Glare Stare and being bossy."

Gibbs let out a slight snort of laughter and pulled back. "Sometimes it pays to be the boss." He grabbed his gear from his desk, and brushed past her. "Now quit pouting, Matthews. You are not going."

Evelyn gave him a petulant look, and watched as the team walked off the elevator without her. Tony gave her an over exaggerated wave to which she gave him a sour look. The elevator doors pinged closed, and Evelyn sat there in the computer chair in the middle of all the empty desks with a frown on her face. She fiddled her fingers together before she stood up from the chair, and said, "I do not pout." The thought slipped through her mind when she heard her phone ringing. She rushed over to her desk, and pulled the draw open. Her fingers shoved down into her purse, but as soon as her fingers slid around the cellphone, it stopped ringing.

"Of course," she rolled her eyes, and pulled her cell phone out. She flipped it open, and shocked jolted through her like lightning. The name Lucas stared back at her. She blinked at the name on the screen before her expression turned thoughtful. A small half smile curled on the edge of her lips, and she cocked her head to the side. She listened to the voicemail he had left, asking for her help when she got off work. A small smile spread across her face despite herself and she murmured, "Huh."

Lucas paced around his house, tidying things up. It still struck him as odd as doing something as domestic as cleaning. Sometimes it vaguely felt as if someone else were walking in his shoes, a phantom of he used to be before the betrayal, before the torture. Before all that, things like this wouldn't have given him pause or struck him as odd. Before all that, he had understood all the daily things which now left him at best confused at times. He had straightened up the pillows on his couch when there the chime of the doorbell. He stilled for a half of a second before he straightened his shoulders and walked over towards the door.

He felt vulnerable without a weapon on his though he reminded himself that there was a gun hidden in the umbrella stand (a cliché place to stick it, he knew), but most convenient. His hand fell on the cool steel handle and he drew in a breath to pull together his composure before he pulled the door open. He watched as Evelyn twisted around, a brief startled flirted across her face before her features smoothed out into a nervous smile. "Hey," Evelyn said, a trace of uncertainty on her features. "You, uh, called? Said you needed my help?"

"Uh, yes, yes," Lucas nodded. "Come in," he said, and stepped out of her way. Evelyn hesitated for a brief moment before she walked through the threshold and into the house. The house was filled with neutral grays and whites giving it a calm and collected feeling. Though the piles of boxes took away from the appealing dark wood floors and large fire place.

"Sorry that is a bit of a mess. Still settling in I suppose," Lucas gave her a half grin as he moved the boxes out of the way and put them in the closet. "My last place was a bit more communal, so it's a bit of a squeeze. If you see anything you like just steal it. Honestly I'll never know," he said, with a shrug of his shoulders and a breathlessly chuckle.

"It's alright," Evie said, with a slight smile. "I haven't got quite finished settling in myself. You certainly have a better start than I do. Besides, your timing is perfect," Evelyn told him, pulling off her gloves. It was a very cold October. Forecast even predicted snow for Halloween. "I had just got done with my paperwork and had no further desire to sit at the office."

"Here," Lucas reached out to help her with her jacket. He was careful to keep his hands upturned towards the inside of the jacket so his hands wouldn't touch her. He did not want to startle her like he had at the bar, and he pulled her free from her coat and hung it on the coat rack.

"Why thank you," Evelyn said, biting back a smile because she couldn't remind a time when a man helped her with her coat and was frankly surprised by his gestured. "Kind and has manners. Where have you been all my life?" She said, with a teasing tone in her voice.

"Looking for you," Lucas said, with not a lick of shame in the flirt.

Evelyn let out a startled light laugh then pressed her fingers to her lips embarrassed by how loud it had been. The tension that she had been dreading wasn't there. In fact, she felt a bit lighter than she had in the last few days. "You are going have try harder than that, you know?" She told him, amused.

"I must have gotten it right because I got you here," Lucas said, his hand pressed together as he looked at her with a beseeching smile. "And I could really use your help, if you could spare it."

"Well," Evelyn brushed a strand out of her face, "I do owe you for coming to get me when I was in bad shape…so what can I do for you?" She said, with a

Lucas smiled. "Help me cook dinner."

Evelyn blinked in surprise. "Dinner?" Evelyn said, slowly. "You want me to repay you back with dinner?" She let out a slight laugh still a bit confused by his requested.

"Kind of," Lucas said, running his hand across his jaw. "I figured since our timing in trying to plan a dinner or breakfast seemed always to have something come in the way, I figured perhaps spontaneity would prove more fruitful."

Spontaneity. There was a word that she hadn't used in a long time. Control had been her anchor the last year and a half. Planning had always given her a measure of comfort, though plans could always fall apart. There was little things she left to chance anymore, and it had been a long time since she had 'gone with the flow' so to speak. "Maybe…" Evelyn commented, quietly. It wasn't often that she didn't have the words, or that she felt so meek in someone's presences.

Lucas felt the sensation of disappoint begin to unfurl in his stomach the longer she stared up at him with wide, startled eyes above her crossed arms. She had curled in on herself slightly, with a little forlorn expression on her face and she looked younger and smaller all of the sudden. "Oh, heavens," Evelyn suddenly ran her fingers through her hair as the tension seeped out of her body. She flashed him a rueful smile. "I must look like I'm expecting the worst or something."

"A little bit," Lucas answered, with a rueful grin. His grin faded and he looked at her with a serious expression. "If you are uncomfortable, you don't have to-"

"No, no," Evelyn cut him off with a tiny laugh. "It's just surprising. I'm not…" She looked down at her feet for a long moment then her eyes flickered back up at him. "I don't make friends, or socialize very easy. At my job, it's easy because I can compartmentalize everything and there is a bit of distance I can put between my work and my home." She paused for a moment wondering how to put this without revealing anything to personal about herself. "In my personal life, at home, I'm…awkward at best and it's been a long time since I've wanted to change that."

"And that means?" Lucas inquired.

"It means yes," Evelyn said, tucking her hand behind her ear. If it became too much for her, home was just across the yard and she had to try at some point. "I would love to help you with dinner. It would be nice change of pace then sitting at the house with a tv dinner. I will warn you I have to keep busy when I'm in the kitchen. Things that I have to wait on end up uncooked or burnt beyond belief if I sit idly."

"Well, I'm sure we can find something to occupy yourself with," Lucas tossed her a smirk. She ducked her head, and oh, she was lovely when she blushed like that.

"I'm not sure we know each well enough for you to make such offers," Evelyn countered, a slyness edge to her smile. She watched his eyes flickered with brief surprise before his grin broaden.

"What makes you think that I was offering myself?" Lucas asked, his voice deceptively soft. His was voice was one that could encompass a room without being loud, and the way he spoke was quite compelling.

"I know an innuendo when I hear one," Evelyn told him, with a breathy chuckle. She pointedly tried not to notice how nice his jeans accentuated his backside as she followed him to the kitchen. "I have to listen to them on daily bases thanks to Tony, so I've become quite the expert on spotting them."

"Tony?" Lucas arched a brow.

"A coworker," Evelyn explained.

"A coworker who makes passes at you?" Lucas said, with the smallest frown tugging at the edge of his lips.

"He's not serious when he makes them," Evelyn stated, with a shake of her head. "It would be annoying if he were serious, but he is not." As they entered the kitchen, Evelyn took in the stainless steel and white countertops. In reminded her of a country home with a quaint charm about it that she hadn't expected. Perhaps it was because she looked at Lucas, he didn't come off to her as a country boy. "So what we do first?" Evelyn asked, recapturing his attention. "Cut up the vegetables?"

"Ah, yes. Might as well get the worst part over first," Lucas agreed, with an incline of his hand. He grabbed the pan he had gotten out, then pointed at the cutting board and knife. "I'll get the pan oiled up to sauté them if you want to do the cutting."

"It would be my pleasure," Evelyn grinned. Lucas couldn't stop the answering it with one of his own.

The airport was busy and crowded. People flooding in and out with noise so deafening it was hard for a person to hear their own thoughts. He however glided through with a lethal gracefulness as he grabbed his bags. When the attendant offered him a "Welcome to America" commented, he smiled. "Thank you," Tarasov smiled, thinly. His voice thick with Russian accent. "I'm sure I will be very…welcomed."

END OF CHAPTER!

NEXT CHAPTER: Lucas and Evelyn grow closer unaware that danger in on the horizon, while Fornell begins to question Lucas's loyalty to the mission and Ziva begins to dig deeper into Evelyn's past determined to get to the bottom of it all. Meanwhile Gibbs is determined that Evelyn is not going anywhere.

Rrs are appreciated.