Hermione blinked awake, her eyes adjusting to the light and it took a few seconds for her to recognise her surroundings. The previous night came crashing down on her, and she closed her eyes again. She was wrong, it didn't look better this morning. She sat up, not sure if she should leave, not sure if Narcissa had already seen her. And if she had seen her, sneaking out wasn't an option. And Hermione knew that staying would mean an explanation. She put her head in her hands and groaned quietly; no, nothing looked better this morning.
She heard a hushed voice conversing with someone in the next room.
"No!" Narcissa's voice was demanding, "You stay right where you are. You are not to come here... Draco Lucius Malfoy! You will do as you are asked...I understand you're worried, but I will talk to her...no buts, you stay where you are. Do not make me ban you from my house...I don't know, she's still sleeping...yes, as soon as she wakes up...yes, I will talk to you later."
"Hi," Hermione said sheepishly when Narcissa entered the living room, "Sorry that I'm here, I just..." Hermione pulled the blanket tightly around her, she didn't even know what to tell her. She had clearly been talking with Draco (Narcissa had embraced muggle technology and her love for mobile phones was second only to her son), and she had no idea what his version of events was. "I shouldn't have come here I've put you in the middle of this, sorry...I'll go."
"Hermione, darling, you know that you are welcome here," Narcissa sat beside her and took her hand, "And if you needed to use my couch as a place of refuge, I'm more than happy for you to do so."
"Thank you," she said quietly.
"Let me make you some tea," Narcissa said with a smile, "And then we can talk."
A few minutes later she returned from the kitchen, two steaming cups in her hands. Hermione took the one that was handed to her, gripping it in her cold hands, warming them. She was sure that it wasn't proper etiquette, but etiquette was out the window, considering she was sitting on Narcissa's couch, barely dressed covered only by a transfigured blanket.
"Imagine my surprise when I woke up and discovered a body on my couch this morning." Narcissa said, her voice airy, trying to keep things light.
"Sorry," Hermione said again, "I just came here without even thinking. You spoke to Draco?"
"Don't apologise," Narcissa told her, "Like I said, you're welcome here. And yes, I spoke with my son. I was more than a bit shocked to find you here, so I called him to ask why on earth you would be on my couch first thing on Saturday morning. He has called back several times, he's very worried about you."
"So he told you what happened?" Hermione sipped her tea, the warmth doing nothing to dislodge the heaviness still residing in her chest.
"He told me that you had somewhat of a disagreement and that you left."
Hermione frowned, "That's it? That's all he told you."
Narcissa smiled, "No, but it doesn't matter what he told me. I want to know your reason for being on my couch."
Hermione pursed her lips, not sure where to begin. She glanced at Narcissa, hesitant to say much of anything to her. She had no idea what to say; exactly how much she should tell her. This was Draco's mother, and if it came down to choosing sides – which she hoped it wouldn't - Hermione was sure that she would side with her son. She guessed, in that case, she had nothing to lose.
"How much has Draco told you about us?" Hermione figured she may as well start at the beginning.
Narcissa frowned, as if she wasn't sure what that had to do with anything that Draco may have told her, "I'm not sure what you mean, but he has only told me how much he loves you, and that you've been together since your final year at Hogwarts."
Hermione gave her a small smile and nodded, "We have. But there's a whole lot more to it than that." She wasn't sure what Draco would think about what she was about to divulge to his mother. But for her to completely understand what had happened, why she was on her couch, she needed to hear the entire story. She took a deep breath, here goes nothing, she thought, "Draco and I have been together since Hogwarts, and during that time we were...well...together." Her face flushed and her eyes dropped to the floor.
Narcissa kept her face straight, a little shocked that Hermione was telling her this, but she was not naive enough to believe that they had not been sleeping together for some time now, "One would assume," she said, "Raging teenage hormones, and all."
Hermione looked up at her, and couldn't help but smile at the smirk on Narcissa face, "Well, um, I was Draco's first. But Draco wasn't mine."
"O-kay," Narcissa said slowly, "And how does that affect what happened last night?"
"There have been some jealousy issues," Hermione explained, "Mostly Draco, but I'm by no means completely blame free. The biggest thing it that he can't seem to get past the fact that that he's not my one and only, when I'm his. And it has caused some angst between us. It has been quite some time since there have been any problems with it, but last night a girl approached him at the bar and I'll be honest, I did nothing because I wanted to see how he would react. Naturally he turned her down, however, the thought got in his head of what it would be like to be with someone else.
"And when we got home, he took his frustrations out on me," Narcissa's eyes narrowed, but Hermione reassured her, "He didn't hurt me, I wouldn't have let him, and he stopped before it went too far. Then he blamed himself and got angry, and he hates himself for it. I asked him if he wanted to take a break, or even end it. But I kind of got mad and left before he could really talk to me. And that's how I ended up on your couch," Hermione said.
"I just don't know what happened, why I got so mad at him. He really did nothing wrong. I truly hated that he might have considered leaving. I don't want to be with anyone else. I love him with all my heart. And the thought of not being with him..." she closed her eyes, "...I don't even want to think about it."
Narcissa placed her cup on the coffee table, and looked at Hermione. She took a deep breath, processing what Hermione had just told her.
"You've been more open and honest with me than I ever thought you would be, and I'm not sure if I needed every little detail," she quirked an eyebrow at Hermione, "But thank you, it has made things much more clear." She leaned towards Hermione and took her hand, "I think you both may have been at fault, his behaviour towards you was clearly deplorable, he should have known better than to take his frustrations out on you, but running away and not giving him the chance to explain, that definitely wasn't fair." Narcissa said, "You said that he told you he thought about being with someone else?" Hermione nodded, "And you gave him an option, but didn't allow him the time to think about what you were saying? You just instantly though he wanted to leave you and you walked out?"
Hermione nodded, but remained silent, realising where this was going.
"My son, for all his faults, loves you more than anything, and I know that because I've seen the way he is with you. Not how he looks at you, but how he is." Hermione frowned, not understanding, "He protects you without you even knowing it; he makes sure you're his first priority, because he knows that you never put yourself first. I have never before seen him like he is when he's with you. The selfish, sullen boy is gone. You've brought peace and clarity to his life, when just a few years ago, he wasn't sure how long his life would actually be. His tendency to get jealous has been his biggest failing since he was small. He lived under Lucius's scrutiny all his life, and striving to please his father at any cost was all that mattered to him. So anyone who took his fathers' attention away, caused great stress for him, and his jealous streak would make him behave, and treat those people, terribly. And I think he feels the same way with you. He knows that you love him, and that you're not going anywhere, but any attention that you are given by another man, regardless of how innocent, will instinctively have him on edge.
"Hermione, I know that you were angry, but running from him wasn't the answer. You need to talk to him, and you need to make him talk to you. You can't expect things to work between the two of you if you don't talk to each other. And not only did you need to talk, you needed to listen to him, but you just didn't give him chance." She gave Hermione a knowing look, "And I don't think it's just Draco that gets jealous. Seeing him talking to someone else was something new for you, and I don't think you liked it."
Hermione shook her head, "No, I didn't."
"How you felt, that's how it is for him, but its worse because he knows that there have been others in your life. He knows that those others may have felt the same way he feels about you, and that's hard for him to come to terms with because he's never had the chance to know that with anyone else. And he's never going to, because he simply adores you and I know that there's no one else he wants to be with. And I also know that right now he will be at home kicking himself, and trying to figure out how he can fix this, when in reality he's done nothing wrong."
"He really hasn't, has he?" Hermione said quietly and Narcissa shook her head, "I think I screwed up big time."
"Darling, listen to me. There are so many things in his life he has done wrong, so many bad choices, but you are definitely not one of them. I may not have approved of you at first, but you have helped him become someone who I am even more proud of and for that alone you are more than I could have ever hoped for him. He has chosen you because he saw in you someone who he needed and would keep him safe, someone who simply needed the same thing from him. And you are most definitely that someone, so can you imagine what is was like for him to have you assume he wanted to leave you and then watch you walk out on him?"
Hermione felt the tears well in her eyes. Regardless of the fact that over the last year the two had become firm friends with Narcissa becoming completely accepting of her, Narcissa's spoken approval of her was still a shock. And the fact that Narcissa had so calmly made her see her own mistake made Hermione respect her even more. She could have flown into a rage and kicked her off her couch and told her in no uncertain terms to leave, but instead she listened and made no judgement of her.
Hermione put her head in her hands, "What have I done?" she whispered.
Narcissa ran a soothing hand over her back, "You got jealous and overreacted, but this isn't the end. I know it's not. He loves you far too much for that. Now, you must be starving; time for brunch and then you can go and talk to him and work this out."
"Brunch? How late is it?"
"Almost eleven," Narcissa told her, "I didn't want to wake you." Hermione was surprised, but then it was probably close to three-am before she had finally nodded off.
"Um," Hermione hummed looking down at herself, "I'm not sure if brunch is an option, I'm only wearing pyjama's."
Narcissa laughed, "Darling, we're not going anywhere, Deeny will cook for us."
Hermione looked around, realising Narcissa's house elf had not popped up. She usually clung to Hermione anytime she visited, the tiny creature was completely besotted with her, "Where..?"
"Oh, I insisted that she leave you be, and let you sleep, but I know she's going crazy not being allowed to see you."
Hermione laughed, "Well, I'd love to see her." And at her words, the elf appeared, dressed in a bright yellow tutu and wearing an orange woollen hat with ear holes cut out. She bowed so deeply at Miss Hermione, that the top of her head scraped the floor.
Hermione laughed and squeezed Narcissa's hand, "Thank you Narcissa. Thank you for not judging me and thank you for making me see things much more clearly."
"Oh, I'd never judge you darling," Narcissa winked at her, "I was young once."
Hermione laughed and flicked her wrist, turning the blanket back to its original pillow form, and then transfigured her singlet into a t-shirt, feeling a little less exposed.
"Wandless Magic?" Narcissa looked impressed, and Hermione nodded, "My son is right, you truly you are wonderful."
"Hey," a quiet voice said from behind him.
Draco was pacing the living room, staring at his phone, waiting for his mother to call him back. He spun around to see Hermione standing in the doorway, "Hermione?" Draco rushed to her, cupping her face, "Are you okay?"
Hermione nodded. He was pale and drawn, dark lines circled his eyes, and she knew he'd not slept a wink. His usually alive eyes were faded, heavy with anguish, and the concern in his voice and the gentle touch of his hands brought tears flooding to her eyes. This was her fault, she'd done this to him, and yet, he was worried about her.
He wrapped his arms securely around her, while her tears flowed freely from her. He was begging her to stay with him, to not walk out and leave him. He placed soothing kisses on the top of her head, apologising repeatedly and began rambling; he couldn't believe that he had acted like he had. He loved her with his heart and soul, and he had betrayed her trust, and he was so sorry. He wasn't interested in anyone else. He couldn't stand the thought of not being with her. There would be no regrets, she was his only choice, and he wanted only her.
"I'm sorry," he said one more time.
"Please, don't," she said, stepping out of his embrace.
Draco looked at her perplexed. He wasn't sure what was happening, "I don't understand. Why-"
"Draco, I was out of line and I should never have left. I blindsided you and didn't give you the chance to talk. I was selfish and inconsiderate. I'm so sorry."
"What are you talking about?" Draco searched her eyes trying to figure out her meaning, "I attacked you, and you're apologising?"
"But you didn't attack me, not really. Well, no worse than I've done to you," she gave him a small smile, "Draco, when I asked if you wanted a break, and you didn't answer right away, I jumped to conclusions. I just thought..." Hermione shook her head, "I thought that you wanted out. That you wanted more, with someone else."
"Hermione, no," Draco sounded alarmed, causing Hermione's chest to constrict. She had truly hurt him, and worst of all, he was blaming himself, "It was just a thought. And I hate myself for it. I don't want anyone else."
"I know, and I should have let you explain that. And I know that simply thinking about being with someone else doesn't mean you want to be. I overreacted and I assumed the worst."
Draco frowned, "Have I ever given you a reason to assume the worst?"
"Never," Hermione heard in her own voice the disappointment she felt in herself.
Draco gripped her shoulders, "Everything we've done together, and everything we've been through," He huffed out a breath, "Do you know what the easiest thing was?" Hermione shook her head, "Falling in love with you. It was easy. Absolutely fucking easy. It might sound like a cliché, but isn't it supposed to be that way?"
Hermione swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat, and nodded. He was right. So completely right. Everything that had happened between them, all the jealousy, all the fights, all the rumours, it was all irrelevant, just bumps in the road. Simply being with him was the easy part.
"So why did you assume the worst?" He asked.
"Because, stupidly, in my head you had already made up your mind and it scared me. I pictured you and that girl together and I couldn't stand the thought of you with someone else," Hermione's cheeks reddened, "And I know that's not fair considering, well, myself. But I like that you're just mine, and I know that's selfish, but I do."
Draco took her in, she was usually confident and bright, but right now she looked completely dispirited. He stepped closer to her and pulled her to him, "I am yours, you know that, right?"
"I do," she sighed, relaxing against him, loving the feel of his arms around her, "Sorry I flipped out."
"You were jealous, huh?" Draco said the hint of a smile on his lips.
"I was," Hermione admitted freely, "And I'm sorry that I didn't fully understand how you felt all those times with me." She wrapped her arms around his neck and she pressed her face into his shoulder, "Are we okay?"
Draco kissed the top of her head, "We're okay." He led her to the sofa, pulling her down to sit with him, "Jealousy suits you."
"It fits both of us well," she replied, taking his hand and holding it between them. He watched as her thumb lightly rubbed over his.
"I promise I will never hurt you ever again." He told her.
"And I promise I won't run just because things aren't going my way," she smiled at him.
"I'm glad you're home." He whispered.
"Me too," Hermione said, cradling her head against his shoulder. She sighed at the familiarity of it. He pressed his cheek to the top of her head as she closed her eyes, sighing, her body relaxing against his, her hand reaching up to rest over his heart, feeling the steady thumping beat.
"Can we just stay like this?" she murmured quietly.
"For as long as you like." Draco whispered and closed his eyes.
The amber glow of the early morning sunlight spilled into the bedroom the next morning, the warm beams of light hitting their bodies where they were nested in their own world of large fluffy pillows and a down comforter. They'd fallen asleep wrapped together, laying as close to one another as possible, arms wrapped tightly around each other, each fearful that the other would be lost. But Hermione had shifted during the night, and her restless sleep had left her sprawled across one side of the bed, laying almost sideways, her feet resting across Draco's hip.
Hermione's eyes flickered open. She curved her back in a cat stretch and she let out a loud yawn.
"Rough night, huh?" Draco's voice rumbled, and he rubbed at her foot.
Hermione blinked several times, clearing her sleep filled eyes. She lifted her head, and laughed when she saw how she was laying, "I guess so," She adjusted her position, moving to lay beside him, kissing his cheek.
Draco chuckled beside her, "You're a mess this morning."
"A beautiful mess I would hope."
"No. Not even close," he said with a grin, "It looks like a family of birds slept in your hair."
"Wow, thank you so much." She slapped his chest, "I mean really, I'm blushing."
Draco laughed, pressing a hand to the base of her spine, pulling her even closer, "I didn't say I didn't love this mess, I simply said you're a mess."
She pushed back from him, rolling towards the side of the bed, "Hey," he said, looking alarmed, "I was joking."
She laughed, squeezing his foot as she walked around the foot of the bed, "I know you were, but my bladder is insisting I leave you for about a minute and a half. I'll be right back."
Draco watched her as she left the room; even in her scruffy morning state she was stunning. She was all curves and lean muscle, her movements lithe and graceful. An aura of confidence surrounded her. He felt the familiar stirring low in his belly, but shoved it away. He wasn't sure she'd be up for that, considering the events of the wee hours of the previous morning.
He dropped his head back onto the pillow and pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes, sighing contentedly. He smiled to himself, they were both idiots. Arguing was fine, jealousy was fine, but him punching a wall, and her running away? No, that was not fine, it was childish. He huffed out a laugh and shook his head; yes, they were both indeed idiots.
He felt her squeeze his foot again when she returned, "What are you thinking?"
"That we're both idiots," He mumbled. He took his hands away from his face and lifted his head to look at her and almost laughed, "Did you brush your hair?"
She poked her tongue out at him as she crawled back under the covers, "I can't have you looking better than me, can I?" She lay her head on the pillow, flicking her now under control hair over her shoulder, "Why are we idiots?"
"All the crap we've been through, and we still act like children," he mused, "It might be time to grow up."
She kissed his cheek, "I think you're right."
He rolled to his side and placed both his hands beneath his cheek, mirroring her pose, "My mother's couch?"
Hermione laughed, "I know, who would have thought?"
"She was completely shocked when she found you there," he told her, "And then of course she called me and asked me what the hell had happened to make you feel that you had to sleep on her couch."
"Yeah, I wasn't really thinking when I left. I kind of just went there." She shrugged, "She's pretty amazing, your mother. I have no idea why I was so terrified of her."
"I told you you'd love her," He said smugly.
"Don't be so smug," Hermione bit her lip nervously, "She may have heard some things that she never thought she would."
Draco raised an eyebrow, slightly concerned as to what the two had talked about, "What exactly did you tell her?"
Hermione twisted her face into an unsure grimace, "Um, I just told her about us, how we got together..."
"What!" Draco's eyes went wide, "You did not!"
Hermione nodded and grinned, "I didn't give her all the details, just the basics, and she took it pretty well."
"So she knows that you were..." he shook his head in disbelief.
"Your first? Your one and only?" She looked at him with wide, innocent eyes as she teased him, "She does, and you have nothing to be embarrassed about, she's very proud of you."
"Can I ask why you felt you should tell her that?" Draco asked.
Hermione shrugged, "I really don't know. I guess I just thought it would help her understand why I was there. I didn't think that telling her that we just had a fight would really float with her, she would have seen straight through it. A simple fight wouldn't land me on her couch. I think she was a bit shocked that I told her, but she understood why I did."
Draco huffed out a breath, "Wow, I don't think I'll be able to look my mother in the eye ever again."
"Oh, come on, it's not that bad," Hermione told him.
"Not that bad!" Draco laughed, "My mother knowing about my sex life is not that bad?"
"Nope," Hermione said, "Because I'm absolutely sure that she will never ever mention it to you."
"I can't believe you told her!" he was still laughing, "When I said that two of you would become friends, I never thought you would be that good of friends!"
"You're not mad?" Hermione asked.
"No," he said, "There's no point. She knows and there's nothing I can do about it."
"That's very grown up and adult of you," Hermione said.
"Ah, yes, the new phase in our lives; grown up and adult," he agreed.
"An excellent plan," Hermione said, brushing her hand across his cheek.
He took her hand and kissed her palm and an easy silence settled between them. She took in his features; his storm-grey eyes were what she loved most. She always had. Even, all those years ago, when she thought he hated her, she was always drawn to his eyes. They gave away everything. He carried his emotions there; anger, joy, sadness, all of it. He had tried to mask his emotions from an early age, but his eyes gave it all away. Narcissa was right. As much as he had changed, some of the old Draco was still in there. It wasn't a bad thing, it was just who he was. And she now realised she shouldn't try to change that.
She traced her finger tip across the arch of his brow, circling his eye and following his cheekbone, "Your eyes are beautiful."
"Beautiful, huh?" he asked as her hands began to wander. Across his chest and stomach, curving around his hip and coming to rest at the small of his back.
"Beautiful," she whispered, her fingers tracing tiny circles on his back, "They tell me everything I need to know about you. Your anger and your hurt; when you're upset, when you're happy. How much you love me." She leaned in and kissed him, claiming his mouth with much more heat than he expected. Her tongue slipped through his lips, parting them to dip inside the warmth of his mouth. Draco met her tongue with his, tasting her, wanting to taste every inch of her skin. She whispered against his mouth, and he suddenly felt her naked body against his.
He pulled back and smirked at her, "Maybe you should teach me this wandless magic. Then I can have you naked any time I want."
Hermione arched an eyebrow at him, "Do you think maybe that's the reason I haven't taught you?"
Draco laughed and resumed kissing her. After several minutes of exploring each other's mouths, he broke them apart, pushing up on his elbow. He caressed her cheek, smiling at her before dipping down to press his lips over her heart, kissing her as he told her, "You're all I ever need... All I want...All I love. "
"Draco," she breathed, and then all thoughts were lost as he took a nipple into his mouth and sucked. Hermione moaned, arching beneath him, digging her fingers into his back. He started to move lower, kissing the valley between her breasts, along her ribs, her navel. But Hermione stopped him, cupping his jaw, forcing his face up. "No," she murmured, "You. Just you."
Draco moved slowly, crawling up to cover her, pressing his weight down on her and leaning on his forearms holding himself slightly above her so he could devour her mouth. He rocked his hips gently against her, his cock slipping between her folds, sliding deliciously across her sensitive clit.
She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and hooked her legs over his hips, drawing him even closer. He stilled his hips, pressing himself to her entrance, locking his eyes to hers. She brushed her hand across his cheek, waiting for him to enter her and when he surged forward, he did so slowly, stretching her, filling her, causing her eyes to shut and her breath to hitch.
Hermione felt him press his forehead to hers; his breath was everywhere, covering her, and she breathed him in. She loved him like this. Loved when he took his time. Loved the slow, torturous way he made love to her. They way he could make her melt, the way he's focus solely on her wiping all coherent thoughts from her mind.
She opened her eyes and found him staring down at her, "I love you Draco. I love you so much it hurts."
He leaned down and kissed his way along her neck, taking the lobe of her ear into his mouth, "And I love you, my beautiful, sweet girl."
Hermione moaned as he began to roll his hips, moving inside her. Slow, deep thrusts that were both strong and gentle at the same time. She shifted her hips beneath him, meeting his thrusts, their bodies moving together in a slow rhythm as the world fell away, leaving only them.
He dropped his mouth to her neck, kissing and biting gently at the skin on her throat, feeling her fingers dig into his back as she hissed out a breath. He picked up his pace slightly, his pelvis connecting with her clit as he built the friction inside her.
"Draco," Hermione moaned, "More."
"More?" Draco smirked down at her, still thrusting slowly into her, "More how?"
She slid her hands down his back, digging her fingers into his arse, "Harder."
Draco shifted above her, raising himself onto his hands, digging his knees into the mattress and began thrusting harder into her. He reached down between them working her clit, dragging his fingers across it in a rhythm that matched his thrusts.
Hermione panted as he drove into her, "So good," she managed between breaths.
He watched as her skin flushed pink and he grew impossibly harder inside her, "Fuck!...I'm not...last much longer."
"Don't stop Draco." She moaned, "So...ungh...close."
He upped his tempo, driving into her and stroking her clit harder. She moaned loudly at the double sensation and he felt her tightening around him. He removed his fingers from her clit, lowering himself back down to her and thrust into her hard and fast.
She arched beneath him, her inner muscles spasmed around his hard flesh. She cried out his name as her body shuddered and quaked. Draco felt her orgasm explode around him, hot and wet, causing him to jerk into her, losing the steady rhythm he'd set. He slammed as deeply into her as he could, jets of warm liquid exploding from him, filling her. He groaned and collapsed onto her.
They lay together, covered in sweat, panting for breath, his head resting on her chest, her fingers brushing along his spine.
"Hmmm," Hermione hummed, completely spent and completely satisfied, "That was very grown up of us."
Draco laughed, his body shaking against hers, "Yes," he said and placed a kiss over her heart, "Yes, it most definitely was."