Hey all.

Finally got the next one up. I can't believe we've reached number eleven so quickly. I can remember writing just the first chapter and hesitantly putting words to paper wondering if anyone would like it. Thankfully you guys have been with me through it all and have helped me place each piece of this puzzle. Thank you. Truthfully, you guys are as much the writers of this story as I am. Without all your support I wouldn't have made it this far, so thank you. To those of you who have been with me since the very beginning, and even those who have recently joined I hope that you have enjoyed the story so far. I promise you that there is still more to come. The plot is simmering away just waiting for me to plate it just right.

This chapter is a little fluffier than the others. There is not much in the way of plot structure but I thought we could all use a break so that we could relax and just have fun :) I think it's still important for character building and it strengthens the relationship between B&J but I could have possibly left it out. Oh well, I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it.

Oh, and the title for this chapter once again comes from an adorable song by the great Delta Goodrem

Leeleerose xx

VISUALISE

I buried my head under my doona. It was the eve of Jake's birthday and I was stuck. Not physically stuck, but mentally. I was lying across my bed, my arms and legs sprawled wide with my head face down. I had no idea what on earth I was going to get Jake, the most important person in my life right now, and I had less than 24 hours to come up with something that expressed just how much he meant to me. Our relationship had surpassed the mere giving of flowers and chocolates. We had started further up the dating chain. I guess you could say that we were intermediates, rather than beginners.

I wanted my gift to show him just how important he was in my life but nothing that I had seen in the shops really expressed that. They were too commercial. Everything had the ulterior reason of money behind it. Nothing was really about the meaning of the product, but instead about how expensive and shiny it was. And as they say, money can't buy love.

I had decided on something homemade. It would be one of a kind and from my heart, but the problem was what? I didn't want it to look tacky or overdone, but I did want it to be special. I turned my head to the side so that I could see, searching for inspiration somewhere in my room. Sprawled under my doona on my stomach I couldn't see much. The only helpful object was my bedside table.

On top of this sat my digital alarm clock, small CD player, a bunch of assorted CD's spread across the space and a small picture in a thin silver frame. The picture was one of my favourites. It was of Jake and I when we were little. As always Jake held his favourite wooden truck and looked at the camera with wide, dark brown eyes. He was small, no bigger than the little Bella who stood next to him. Although older, my shoulders barely measured up to Jacob's. I stood next to him, holding my favourite plush doll in my arms. Its head lolled to the side, a grin plastered across its jovial face. My other hand held Jake's. Our tiny hands were interlocked tightly. I was smiling, something that until recently had felt alien to me. My bright pink lips and cheeks stood out against my pale white skin.

Standing next to Jake I looked almost albino. If it hadn't been for my brown eyes I probably could have been. Jake, on the other hand, would be classed as brown, even though I knew that he was only tanned when compared to anyone but me.

The picture had been taken by my mum before my parents had divorced. She had taken us two overly excited kids to the park for a special treat. I could almost recall how abnormally warm it had been that day. It never got very hot around here, but on this particular day the sun had been shining in our favour.

From my tiny stature, the swings and slides had looked so big. Every dip in the slide had sent my petite form through the air. Although this had lasted no more than a fraction of a second I could remember the feeling so well. My stomach had done back flips with excitement. I kept going back for more and more.

Jake was the only one brave enough to try the flying fox. I could remember being too scared to use it. It was huge compared to me and I had thought that I might fall off. Even at that age my co-ordination wasn't that good. It wasn't until Jake suggested that I stand on his shoulders while holding onto the bar that I agreed to give it a try. That way if I fell off he would be able to catch me. After mum had hoisted me up to the handle bar I held on tight and placed my dangling feet on Jake's shoulders. Due to the our miniscule heights my feet only just scraped his shoulders, however knowing that he was there made me feel safe all the same. I had felt so free, as though I was flying. I had been happy that day. I had tried the flying fox and conquered my fears. From then on it had been my favourite thing to do at the park.

Suddenly my mind clicked. I knew what I was going to make for Jake. I threw my doona off and pulled myself over to the edge of my bed, bending over so that I could look underneath it. My hair swung low, nearly touching the floor. Carefully I reached down with my hands, feeling around in the dark space until I found it. I tugged the heavy object and a book box slid out from the darkness. I positioned myself so that I now sat cross-legged on the bed and bent to lift the box from the floor. The items inside rattled slightly as I placed it on the bed beside me. I pulled back the sticky tape that bound the lid closed, making a satisfying ripping noise, and pulled back the cardboard flaps to see what was inside.

It was just as I had packed it all those years ago. At the end of one of those summer visits to Forks back when I was about 12 I had decided that I had had enough of art. Before then I had been quite good, especially at drawing. I loved how simple shapes put together with a little bit of shading could tell a story. They could capture a moment in time, whether it be of a person, plant, animal or even an object. Everything had a story to tell, and it had been my goal to capture these stories through my drawings.

My parents had bought me all new pencils and paper for my 12th birthday. I used to love going down to the creek to draw the pretty trees and fluttering butterflies. However, after about a year of this my parents had started to fight again. I had been so caught up with my family issues that I had lost touch with my inner artist. All inspiration was gone. Somehow the creek no longer seemed a happy place. Everything died. I put away my drawing things and taped the box shut as an extra precaution. That summer, before I left to live permanently with my mum in Arizona, I hid it under my bed with the rest of my forgotten dreams, never expecting to open it again.

I stared into the box. All these forgotten memories had been confined for so long. It seemed a pity that they not be put to good use after all these years. The box, although quite small, held many precious items. On the top was an A4 book of drawing paper. I pried it loose from it's restricted space and opened it to the first page, then the next, captivated by what I saw.

I was faced with images galore. Many sets of eyes stared out at me from the pages, landscapes depicted wild winds or scorching sunlight, tiny beach pebbles lined the shoreline of la Push, and a police car flashed its tell-tale lights. With each turn of a page I revisited a memory. These drawings all meant something special; each and every one. They captured each feeling and emotion of my childhood. Eventually I reached a gap in the pages, as though a bunch had been torn from the binding. I ran my finger down the frayed edge. At the time it had seemed necessary, but in retrospect I wished I could have held back my anger and sadness. Those drawings were of my parents when they had been happy. Together and whole as I would never know them to be again. Those people only existed in my memory, that and those few drawings that I had shredded way back then.

I flicked through the rest of the book. Thankfully there were still a few blank pages left that I would be able to use.

Without the thick drawing pad, the box was relatively empty now. I rummaged through the bottom and scooped out a handful of pencils. I rolled them between my palms, twirling colours and leads of different shades. I put them down before taking out the rest and piling them on top. I opened the top drawer of my bedside table and was lucky enough to find a sharpener among the mess of odd pieces. I started to work, sharpening each pencil back from its death and giving them new life.

It took me ages to revive every pencil. Some were so brittle they kept snapping and I would have to re-sharpen it over and over until either it stayed whole, or I gave up and threw it in the bin. I kept at it, the rhythmic timing of each turn against the blade helped me to think. An image was forming in my mind. I could see, almost as though a vision, a montage of what I was about to do.

Eventually all the pencils were done. I opened the drawing book to a blank page and carefully chose a light lead pencil from the pile. I spun it through my fingers a few times so that it travelled from left to right and back again. It was amazing how familiar it felt to have pencil and paper in hand after all these years.

I started by outlining the shapes. Large ovals and rectangles overlapped, creating the body of the piece. Long smooth curves outlined the forms as they took on the characteristics of human figures. In the lower half of the page there stood two children, a tiny Jake and Bella holding hands. Even on such a warm day they still wore jumpers and tracksuit pants because of the never relenting cold wind. They were smiling broadly, eyes wide and excited. Above them were another two figures standing face-to-face. There was an older, darker Jake facing a taller and curvier Bella. Jake's hair was short, like that in the younger drawing of him, but his muscles had definitely shaped more. Perhaps this was because, like so many times these days, he wasn't wearing a shirt. I finished the light sketch and put the pencil back in the box before selecting a darker lead. I put the pencil to paper and began to trace around the definitive lines I could now see making up my drawing. Once I had outlined I began to shade, filling in the space around the bodies with a grey haze. The two pictures moulded into one.

I put back the pencil and looked at my handiwork. Tiny faces stared out at me from the page. The bodies had been transformed from simple lines to 3D forms. I was proud. This was definitely what I wanted to give Jake. It expressed just how much we had changed physically, yet at the same time, just how much had changed as people.

We used to be so small and young. We loved each other as only Bella and Jacob could. As we grew we were pulled apart by situations beyond our control, then I had fallen for the wrong guy and been hurt deeper than I had ever thought repairable. However, Jake had found me again. He had somehow managed to pull me through the rough and just like in the movies, true love had triumphed.

I put the drawing down carefully and scrambled off the bed. I knew what I wanted, but I wasn't sure where I would find it, or how I would cope when I did. I walked through the house, looking on every wall, hoping against hope that it would be there. Sure enough, there it was laying face down on the shelf above the fireplace in the living room. I walked over to it, shaking slightly from the horror I knew I was about to face.

It was a large Black frame, its shine lost to the sheet of dust that now covered it. I lifted the object from the shelf and carefully dusted it off using the front of my shirt. Pale faces loomed back at me, a reminder of my nightmares. It had been taken at my birthday, in the days leading up to his departure. His arm was wrapped around my waist, pulling me against his cold body. His head was bowed slightly so that I couldn't see his eyes.

My heart wrenched in my chest as the picture pulled on my already tender heartstrings. I was hanging on tender hooks. Any further thought on the matter and I knew I wouldn't last. My vision was already blurred as tears filled my eyes.

I unclipped the backboard and took out the picture, throwing it amongst the coals of the fireplace. I took the shovel from beside the hearth and dug it deep into the coals. I scooped them up, bit by bit and covered the picture until I couldn't see a hint of the object. Tonight, when the logs were burning for warmth, the picture would burn as well, and there would be no trace left behind to suggest it had ever existed.

I turned without deliberation and half ran out of the room. Quickly, I took the stairs two at a time, and didn't stop my unnatural speed until I reached my room.

Shutting the door behind me I leant against the wood and slid to the floor. I pulled my knees to my chest and twisted my hands in my hair, leaning my elbows on my knees. My breathing was constricted as though the air around me was thinner than usual. My head was spinning with what I had just done. I had managed to rid myself of yet another unfriendly reminder of him. Only the difference this time was that I had lasted without Jake. It was a small step, I knew, but it showed that I was making progress. I was finally moving on. It took me a moment to clear my mind. I made sure that there wasn't a risk of me falling into the unknown yet again before pulling myself off the floor to walk back to my bed.

I sat cross legged on the soft covers, dusted the remaining grime off the glass and slid my drawing into the back. I secured the board with the clips before holding it up to see the final product. It was perfect, if I did say so myself. There was only one thing left to do.

I went to my wardrobe and found the blue gift bag I had received with one of my previous presents. I pulled off the tag which read my name and slid the frame inside. I placed the bag next to my bed, ensuring that it wouldn't fall over and turned back to my box of art supplies. There were still a couple of sheets of paper left and it was only 4pm. Charlie could be home in around an hour.

I clambered back onto the bed and ripped out a sheet of paper. I took a dark lead and began to write. Putting the pencil to paper seemed to be my way of expressing myself because all those feelings that had been so difficult to describe were plain and simple once I began to write. The letter read

My Jacob,

There is really no way of saying these things to you, but I am going to try my hardest.

You deserve nothing but the best from me. You are my everything.

You were there for me when I was falling apart, just to put me back together.

I thought I would never run properly again, but you proved me wrong.

I used to think you couldn't survive death, that it was inevitable. It loomed over your shoulder, waiting for that moment of weakness when it would strike us down like the frail humans we are. But when I was there, in those moments, believing that I was worthless and that my end had finally come, you took my heart and you mended helped me to believe that the impossible was possible to overcome. You branded my heart your own, winding our heartstrings together until we were so entwined that now I don't think I could ever live without you.

My heart belongs to you.

Whether through rain or shine, day or night, it is yours. Holey and completely, yours.

People may say I'm crazy, that I'm stupid and young, but I know what we have.

True love is hard to come by, but now that I know what we have, I would fight to the ends of the earth just to stay with you, because I love you.

Happy Birthday Jake.

Love,your Bella xx

I folded up the paper and slipped it into the gift bag. My clock now read 4:30pm. Charlie would be here in about half an hour. I had just enough time to cook dinner.

It was the following day, Jake's Birthday.

I was driving to Jake's house to pick him up, the blue gift bag safely hidden under my seat. Having already rung ahead of time I knew that Jake would just be finishing his morning tea with Billy, after which they had nothing planned. My truck was puttering along slowly, soaking up the extraordinary sunlight we were receiving today.

Billy had laughed when I had called earlier that morning to ask whether I would be able to steal his son away.

"Sure thing Bella, you can keep him for the day. I'm surprised you didn't ask earlier"

"Thanks Billy" I had replied, relieved that he had taken it so well. After all, Jake's father really did come before me, especially on his birthday.

"No really Bella, it's no problem. In fact I bet he would have sulked around for days if he hadn't seen you on his special day. You've just saved me from a lot of grief"

I had chuckled at that one. I was surprised that Jake would act in such a way. It sounded like something I would do, not Jake. It seemed that we were beginning to rub off on each other.

I reached Jake's house by mid-morning. The sun was shining like never before. I was dressed in my almost new mid-thigh beige shorts and white blouse, thinking that I should at least try to expose my skin to some sun while the moment presented itself. I slid out of the truck and half-skipped to the door of Jake's house. I knocked twice on the thick wood and shoved my hands deep into my pockets.

I wasn't sure how I felt about today. It was a special day for Jake and I. We were going to have the whole afternoon together, just the two of us. This was both exciting and nerve-racking. We had never had a whole day to ourselves. The last time we had tried we had been interrupted by some uninvited guests.

I took a deep breath to calm myself just as the door swung open.

"Got it dad" Jake called over his shoulder. He was standing in the doorway wearing his usual denim shorts that cut off just above the knees and a dark coal shirt. It hugged his body lightly, meaning that it could show off his abs without him even trying. He turned to the open door and a look of surprise crossed his face "Bella…" he said quietly "Bella!" Suddenly Jake was holding me, his arms seizing me tightly. I giggled as he lifted me off the ground to spin me around in a tight circle. Reflexively, I pulled my hands out of my back pockets and threw them around his neck, hanging on for dear life. My legs flew through the air and I giggled louder. "Jake!" I exclaimed as my head began to spin. Jake stopped and put me down, his arms never leaving me. "Hey" I said happily, "Happy Birthday!"

Jake laughed, excitement getting the better of him. I stood up on my tip-toes to reach his lips which obligingly leant down to meet mine. We were both standing there, giddy in each others presence. My arms were still wrapped tightly around his neck while his held me securely to his chest.

"How did you get here?" He asked, looking straight into my eyes.

"Um…I can drive myself places every now and again Jake. My truck hasn't died on me just yet"

Jake laughed again "No, that's not what I meant. I was actually wondering how you got the old man to let you come over. I thought I was bound to a day of father-son bonding" Jake made a face and I couldn't help but laugh quietly.

"Don't push it son" a voice came from behind Jake. Billy rolled into view. He smiled at the sight of us, standing in the doorway, obviously completely lost in each other.

"Bella rang this morning and I decided to let you have some freedom today. After all," he said, winking at me "she is your better half"

"She sure is" Jake said, pulling me closer to him.

"But I hope you realise that those father-son moments are some of the best memories you'll ever have."

"Yea dad" Jake answered "But Bella-Jacob moments are a close second"

Billy nodded slowly "Fair enough son, just as long as I'm first" He teased, waving a finger pointedly at us.

"You sure are dad" Billy smiled and raised an eyebrow at his son.

He took a moment before saying "Stop pulling my leg son, I know how much she means to you"

"Bu.." Jake tried to interrupt

"…But nothing." Billy said, refusing Jake's disruption "Now, get out of her. Quick, go!" Billy waved his hands forwards, gesturing for us to move out of the doorway, still smiling insanely.

"Enjoy yourselves," He said as we turned our backs. "Oh, and Jake?"

"Yep" Jake said, turning to face his dad, me still connected to his side

"How about we keep those "Bella-Jacob moments" at a PG rating?" I chuckled to myself as Jake turned us away from the house, shaking his head in embarrassment.

Once we got close to the truck I ran ahead to grab the bandanna I had in the front seat. Jake jogged up behind me, pulling me back against his chest. "What are you doing?" He asked, breathing into my ear. I turned in his arms and held the bandanna at his eye level. It swung there for a few moments between my fingers before Jake took a hand off my waist to take the piece of material from my hand.

"What's this?" He asked "Don't you like my hairstyle or something? If it's a problem I can by a hat, cut it or something. But no offense Bella, I really don't like the bandanna look"

I laughed, again. Wow, I really was doing an awful lot of that today.

"It's not for you're hair silly" I said, taking the bandanna back "It's to cover your eyes. I don't want you to see where we're going"

"Oh" Jake mouthed, realisation dawning on him "Well, in that case, go ahead"

I reached up, taking the material over his eyes and around the back of his head. I pushed up on my toes to tie a knot in the back, causing my uncoordinated self to become unbalanced and slip forwards suddenly. I crashed into Jacob's chest with a huff. His arms constricted and pulled me against him. I leant up and pressed my lips against his. Jake responded passionately, tugging on the base of my shirt. I pulled away, knowing that more-likely than not, Billy was still watching from somewhere behind the window's curtains. "Thankyou, Jake" I whispered, giving him a last peck on the cheek before pulling away to take his hand.

"Really Bells, if you want to spend the day doing that I don't have a problem, none at all. In fact I'll wear the bandanna all day if I have to"

I sighed "Come on" and I tugged him to the truck.

I pulled up in front of the small park. The sun shone brightly, sparkling off the overgrown grass which was still covered in the morning's dew.

"We're here" I announced as the truck came to a stop.

"Finally" said Jake. He had his hands laced together in his lap, twiddling his thumbs in a nervous manner. I opened my door and hopped out, walking around to open the passenger side. I took Jake's hands and guided him so that he was standing on the hard ground.

"Can't I look?" He pleaded, moving a hand as though to remove the bandanna.

"No" I said quickly, taking his hand away at once "Not yet"

Jake moaned but complied. I tugged on his hands lightly, pulling him forwards until we reached the soft grass. Everything was overgrown here, a forgotten place. Nobody came here anymore. They had more important places like the Skate Park or Seattle shopping centre. No one really cared about the little park.

I dropped Jake's hands and moved behind him, reaching up to untie the bandanna. I pulled it off with a flourish and Jake blinked a few times as his eyes adjusted to the bright light. Slowly, his eyes widened as he realised where we were.

"Bella…" He said in disbelief, but he didn't continue. He only walked forwards, taking it all in. I stood behind him, watching his awe as it took over.

He looked around the small area, the slide stood tall with its paint tarnished and worn from the years. It wasn't as big as it used to be. Then there were the swings, again a lot smaller than from memory, and finally the flying fox. A grin flashed across Jake's face as he turned back to me. "Happy Birthday" I said simply.

Jake ran forwards and threw himself upon me. His arms lifted me up into a tight bear hug, squeezing the air out of me. It wasn't until I said his name "Jake, um, I can't breathe" that it put me down. My breathing came quickly now, breathless as I was. "Thankyou" He said honestly. "This is just the best" Jake's beam was contagious. I found myself grinning from ear to ear as he led me to the flying fox.

Jake stepped up onto the platform and I followed. He held onto the bar, turned to wink at me and swung back before lifting his feet off the ground. Jake flew through the air, his legs pulled up beneath him so that they didn't touch the ground. I giggled when he reached the other side and pushed off the platform with his feet to come flying back again.

He stopped the movement, placing his feet on the metal platform that we now both stood on "Come on Bells" He said "hop on"

I did as he asked and puts my arms around his neck before pulling myself up so that I could wrap my legs securely around his waist. Jake glanced back at me "Ready?" He asked

"Yep" I adjusted myself so that I could see over his shoulder "Ready"

"Hold on" He said as he pushed off.

We were flying through the air. The wind whistled in my ears as it passed at a speed I didn't believe possible. My stomach turned as Jake pushed off again to send us flying backwards. However, this time we didn't quite make the distance, stopping somewhere in the middle. I was confused.

"What are you doing Jake?"

"Um, it seems that we've stopped moving"

"I can see that Jake"

"Oh, right" I laughed.

Jake began swinging his body backwards and forwards, me on his back. My head spun. This felt strange, alien. I wasn't sure if I like the way his body was moving against mine, or maybe that was my body moving against his. My legs were still Either way I couldn't help it, and I didn't think it was appropriate for this point in time.

"Jake" I said cautiously "Can you stop?"

His body came to a standstill, hanging from the bar. "Did I hurt you?" He asked, concerned.

"No, no. I'm just feeling a little ill, that's all" I lied, too embarrassed to tell the truth.

"Oh, okay" He said.

There was a moment's pause before Jake spoke again

"Hold onto the Bar Bella" I took an arm carefully from around his neck, my other moving to his shoulder to push up so that I could hold onto the bar. Jake lifted one hand off to allow me to get a better grip. We were both hanging by one hand, connected only by my legs that were still wound tightly around his waist.

"Now, Bella" He said "I'm going to let go of the bar and you're going to let go of my waist and reach up with your other hand to hold on to the bar as tightly as you can, okay?" I nodded. Jake dropped. I let go of him, my legs dangling limply beneath me and swung my other arm up to hold onto the bar. I looked down to see that Jake had landed on the sandy ground below, miraculously still standing. I knew if I tried such a feat I would have ended up on my butt.

"Are you alright?" He asked

"Yep" I said quickly looking down from between my arms. Jake walked over so that he stood in front of me. At his height the top of his head came up to my belly button. He turned and grabbed my legs with his hands, moving them so that they dangled over his shoulders. "Okay Bella" he said "You can let go now"

I took a deep breath and let my hands slip from the bar. I let out a small yelp as my stomach turned in on itself as I fell through the air. Suddenly I was on Jake's shoulders, his hands holding my legs over his shoulders so that I didn't tip off. I put my hands in his hair to make sure I wouldn't.

Jake walked me back to the truck, me on his shoulders like a child. When he reached the truck he opened the door and turned, bending his knees so that I could slip off his shoulders, into the passenger seat. Jake turned to me, a smile on his face. "Was that fun?"

"So much" I said, sounding exactly like my 9 year old self.

"Again, thank you for bringing me here Bella. I had almost forgotten how much fun it was to be a little kid"

"No problem" I said and then I remembered "Oh, there's something else"

"Something else?" He said as I turned in the seat to reach over to the driver's side "What more could you give me?"

I laughed. "You deserve so much more Jake, I only wish I could give you the world, but unfortunately that's a little difficult to gift wrap" I heard Jake laugh behind me as I scooped out the gift bag from its hiding spot and turned back around to face him. "Here you go" I said, now nervous as to what his reaction would be.

Jake took the gift bag from my trembling fingers and gave me a curious look before opening it. He reached inside and pulled out the card and frame. Jake read the card first, a smile forming on his face. He then turned over the frame as his eyes widened.

There was my picture, laid out for him to see.

"It's beautiful" said Jake, his voice shaking slightly with emotion.

"Really?" I asked, reaching out to touch his hand tentatively.

"Really" he confirmed, smiling. Jake leant forwards to meet my lips and kissed me sweetly before pulling away to look at the drawing yet again.

"That part there" he said, pointing "That's my favourite part"

His finger traced my face, smiling sweetly from the page. "I disagree" I said softly, reaching out to circle an area on the glass "This is my favourite part" It was Jake's face, his eyes glistening with love and devotion. Jake sighed and placed the gift along with the bag and card on the dashboard of the car. "Each to their own I guess" He whispered. He moved forwards to where I was seated, so close now that I could feel the heat rising off his body. I closed the space between us, bringing his lips gently to mine.

"Definitely the best birthday ever" Jake mumbled against my lips. I murmured in agreement, while moving my hands to his hair to silence him once more.

There we are, another chapter finished!

Haha, how funny was that line from Billy, just quietly. "How about we keep those "Bella-Jacob moments" at a PG rating?" Sorry, I couldn't resist ;)

So if you liked it, loved it, hated it, let me know. As you know I love my reviews. They really do help to keep me motivated. One week of holidays left!

The next chapter is coming. I promise I will try to have it finished sooner rather than later. Oh and if any of you are interested in seeing my interpretation of Bella's art please let me know and I'll put it on my Profile for you to see. I'm a little shy at showing people my work. Sharing my writing with you all was a big step for me, so to share my drawing with you I think I'll need at least 5 people saying they want to see it

Thankyou my lovelies,

Best wishes,

Lee-leerose xx