A maze filled with Blackwatch agents filled the headquarters located in King's Row. Unlike the massive one Hanzo and Genji discovered in the middle of the ocean, this particular base was cramped and seemed to have more hallways than a single copy of Final F*ntasy XIII could ever have. Hellish did not begin to describe how annoyingly small the place was for Hanzo, but Genji felt relieved to know that he could use his skills as a ninja well in such an obscure place.
His hand still on the door he opened, Genji turned to Tracer as he pointed at a security camera in a far corner of the main room. There were so many hallways connected to the lobby, the cyber ninja knew that it would take some time to infiltrate all of them without alerting the guards patroling from a fair distance.
"Alright, here's the plan," Genji explained. "Lena, go-"
Hanzo fired an arrow at the security camera. The lens let out an ear-piercing shatter as Genji and Tracer cringed at the sheer volume of the sound.
Far away, one- only one- Blackwatch agent turned to the source of the noise and asked dumbly, "What was that noise?" He proceeded to check on what happened to the camera, only to get shot in the back by another of Hanzo's arrows. The agent let out a loud shriek as he fell face-flat, dead.
Standing right next to the corpse, another agent asked out loud, "What was that noise?" He turned and looked down, only to get shot by another of Hanzo's arrows.
One by one, the Blackwatch agents all died without finding the ever-increasing pile of bodies near the broken security camera to be strange before they met their demise.
"How does that actually work?" Genji asked, baffled, yet accustomed to how Hanzo's arrows always seemed to randomize the reactions people had towards them.
"Skill," Hanzo bragged as he fired another arrow out of muscle memory, only to realize that the agents patrolling the particular room were all dead.
"So this is where you picked up skill on how to MURDER ME, right?"
Without answering Genji's question, Hanzo walked into the room.
"Nobody is left," the archer said proudly.
Suddenly, the alarm rang throughout the entire base as the lights went red. Hanzo's delight instantly turned into raw anger as he grit his teeth. Who the heck triggered the alarm when there was nobody to-
The elder Shimada turned around, only to find a Blackwatch agent standing right next to the door. The agent also held some sort of device with a big red button on it.
Infuriated, Hanzo grabbed the Blackwatch agent and threw the unfortunate agent to the ceiling, knocking him out instantly.
"You triggered the alarm, brother!" Genji screamed. "It wouldn't have come to this if you DIDN'T MUR-"
"GENJI, SHUT THE F*CK UP, LET'S MOVE!"
Letting Tracer go through the door first, Genji shortly followed suite and entered the room of red lights. He looked around, his eyes skimming through all the hallways the three could enter first. What could possibly get them valuable items as quickly as possible without dragging out attention from the remaining Blackwatch agents too much?
He then remembered his father's words. "When in doubt, reflect and see if you are right."
So he pointed to his right.
"There!" Genji exclaimed. "Let's go there!"
So Hanzo, Lena, and Genji ran to the hallway on the rightmost side of the room. They were greeted by ten Blackwatch agents.
"GENJI," Hanzo shrieked as all three of the Overwatch agents outran streaks of bullets in the long hallway, "YOU USELESS FREAKING FREAK OF A FREAKIN' OMNIC SON OF A FIREHOSE, WHEN WE'RE DONE, I'M GONNA-"
Tossing a Pulse Bomb down the hallway, Tracer pushed the Shimada brothers to move faster as an explosion rang across the cramped place. They barely made it out of the hall without being consumed by the Pulse Bomb.
"That didn't work out well," Genji muttered before his excitement returned instantly. "Let's go to the leftmost side, then!"
This time, they met twenty Blackwatch agents, all of them ready to capture the Overwatch agents.
"GENJI, YOU STUPID SACK OF ROTTEN COCONUT OIL IMPORTED BY SMELLY OMNIC SLACKERS, WHEN WE'RE DONE, I'M GONNA-"
Tracer reached out to throw out a Pulse Bomb… only to realize that she could carry one at a time. She was out of Pulse Bombs.
"G-Guys, I'm out of Pulse Bombs!"
Genji laughed as he lightly pat Tracer's shoulder. "Do not worry, Lena, I got this!"
Turning around, Genji threw a grenade he picked up from one of the dead Blackwatch agents as he screamed, "RYUJIN NO KEN WO KURAAAAAAAAAAAE!"
It was super effective. As the explosion took out all of the Blackwatch agents, Genji, Hanzo, and Tracer barely escaped the hallway yet again. Exhausted, Tracer lay still on top of Genji's body, which suddenly began to vibrate intensely as the suit's green lights emitted an unusual amount of smoke.
"Thanks… Genji," Lena panted as she lay still. "But holy cow, all of these explosions and running away from these explosions are getting tiring…"
Genji's visor shined brightly as he bolted up, carrying Tracer bridal style as he ran to the next hallway like a dumb*ss. "MY DRAGONBLADE IS READY TO BE UNLEASHED," Genji screamed.
Hanzo did not know what to cringe at. The fact that Genji's anus still responded to anything remotely tempting or Tracer being so useless(?) in general. As another explosion rang from another hallway, Hanzo got up and dusted his bare shoulder.
"We have three more hallways left, thanks to you two's fantastic efforts," Hanzo explained as Genji dropped Tracer and made barfing sounds like crazy. "Let's hope the next one won't lead us to a dead end."
After collecting their breaths, the three moved onto another hallway. This time, however, there were no Blackwatch agents to greet them. A single keycard lay in the middle of the room, light shining down onto it.
"It's a keycard!" Genji exclaimed. "The keycard of England!"
"Of course it is, what are you, five?" Hanzo spat bitterly as he glared at the stupid keycard in the room. Normally, he would just march in and grab the keycard to get things done with, but personal experience let him know that all good things were not given so easily.
"Wait," he said as soon as Lena began moving towards it.
"What's the matter, Hanzo?" Lena asked, her eyes wide in curiosity.
"Shut up for a second."
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It seemed that this time, fate had it that good things would easily go to Hanzo this time. Without any warning, he suddenly ran towards the keycard and reached out for it.
Only to be knocked away from it.
Dammit, bad stuff always happens when I get slightly optimistic, Hanzo thought as he flew across the room.
Landing on his back, Hanzo coughed as Genji and Lena kneeled and held him carefully.
"Brother!" Genji shouted. "Why did you run like a dumbass?!"
"I don't wanna hear that from you of all idiots, Genji," Hanzo coughed out a bit of blood. Tracer's eyes widened as she shook the archer.
"You're hurt!"
"You're making it hurt more with your uselessness."
"Ha ha ha…"
Emerging from the floor, a masked man stood in front of the keycard, cracking his knuckles with glee. It was none other than Reaper who stopped Hanzo from taking the keycard!
"Gwa ha ha. You thought you can take the keycard?" Reaper asked. "Too bad, this thing is the only thing keeping the entire base stable. Without it, the entire place will crumble down and destroy this base. You must be mad to think you can take it!"
"Kuso!" Genji swore under his breath as he took out his dagger. "It's Raper!"
"R-Raper?" Tracer shivered at the mere name as she inched away from the hooded Blackwatch leader instinctively.
"Raper?!" Hanzo coughed. "O-Oh shit, don't let him take my asshole, Genji-"
Sighing, Reaper shook his head.
"I wouldn't say any of you are wrong about me not being Reaper, however," the masked man admitted. "Because I am actually not Reaper."
"What?" Genji muttered, confused. "Then who are you?"
Taking out a single shotgun, the masked man shouted, "I am Bootleg Reaper! Prepare to die!"
Chills ran down Genji's spine. A bootleg rapist?What kind of monstrosity was that? It sounded even more dangerous than the actual "Raper," just by attaching "Bootleg" to the original name.
Dropping Hanzo's head against the floor, Genji stood up as he took out his Dragonblade. "The dragon becomes me! Prepare yourself, Bootleg Raper!"
"Reaper!" The fake Reaper screamed in agony. "Not Raper, Reaper! And it's BOOTLEG Raper, you little sh*t!"
As Genji and Bootleg Reaper fought valiantly, Hanzo coughed more blood as he growled, "Genji, you little sh*t, why would you drop my head against the hard-as-f*ck floor…"
Tracer looked around the room, only to find a blue health kit sitting in the middle of nowhere. She carefully left Hanzo and took the kit. "I'm no expert at this, but I'll try patching you out, love," she said, cringing at the blood that stained her hands. "Just hang on a bit!"
"I wanna die," Hanzo honestly admitted.
As soon as Genji swung his blade and the fake Reaper unloaded a shell from his shotgun, both of their weapons flew to the corners of each room. Realizing that they were practically nothing without a weapon of some kind, the Bootleg Reaper and Genji ran to the corners closest to them.
Holding a shotgun, Genji screamed "RYUJIN NO KEN WO KURAAAAAAAAAAAAE!"
Meanwhile, the Bootleg Reaper stared at the Dragonblade in his hands as he wondered out loud, "Wait, how do I use this?"
The ninja lowered his shotgun as he took the sword from Reaper, showing a basic gist of how to swing the thing. He promptly gave back the sword to the Bootleg Reaper before picking up the shotgun.
"Anyway," Genji said as he held a weapon that did not belong to him in the first place, "RYUJIN NO KEN WO KURAAAAAAAAAAAAAE!"
"Die, DIE, DIEEEEEEEEEEE!"
There was a saying Hanzo heard long ago. In a gun fight, never ever bring a sword.
In Genji's case, it was the complete opposite. In a gun fight, Genji always had to bring a sword.
Firing shells blindly across the room, Genji screamed like a girl as he blasted the entire place apart. He never reloaded and gave the Bootleg Reaper no room for counter attacks as he fired the shotgun endlessly, not knowing who or what he would hit every time he pulled the trigger. He managed to shoot Hanzo somehow, causing the elder Shimada to cough out more blood.
"Genji, for f*ck's sake, I will tear your robot anus apart and toss them in a scrap pile," Hanzo seethed. Tracer panicked and started to patch up Hanzo faster than ever, though she was unaware that all she did was prolong the pain Hanzo felt.
Pulling the trigger fifty times managed to hit the Bootleg Reaper successfully once. Screaming in pain, the Bootleg Reaper fell on his knees as he roared, "The real Reaper won't be as weak as me! Mark my words!"
"Then why the hell did he send you here, then?" Hanzo gurgled.
Without answering the archer's question, the Bootleg Reaper exploded into a bunch of ash. Great. Now Tracer could patch Hanzo up as long as Genji did not touch the keycard.
Unfortunately, Genji snatched the keycard immediately.
"GENJI."
"Hanzo."
"WHY."
"."
Shortly after Hanzo coughed out another chunk of blood, the building began to collapse. "We have to move!" Genji shouted as he picked up Hanzo's body. "Lena, let's go!"
"Right!"
And so, the trio left the crumbling Blackwatch facility. The entire place collapsed shortly after they escaped, and they barely managed to see the light of King's Row again.
They disregarded the fact that they just destroyed a Blackwatch facility right underneath Home Depot. After all, they were too exhausted to even think about anything aside from getting back to the hotel and resting up. Except Hanzo. Hanzo wanted to go to the hospital.
He also thought about going to the afterlife if Genji didn't stop torturing him like he did earlier.
SUPER SHIMADA BROTHERS