Please see first chapter for disclaimer, rating, warnings, pairings, etc.

WARNING: In this chapter a large part of Temari's past is revealed, i.e. the cause of her nightmares and why she got drunk. I just wanted to let you all know that it gets kind of intense, so I wanted to warn my more sensitive readers ahead of time. I really don't want to give you all nightmares, or be the cause of panic attacks or anything. I mean, it's really intense. There were a couple times writing it where I just had to walk away and catch my breath, so - yeah. I wanted to post a warning ahead of time.

Special Thanks: goes out to McKazekage, rao hyuga 18, Guest, milk-weed, Halestrom, TheGirlWithNoIQ, Singofsolace, and greetingsfrommaars for all your wonderful reviews! Also thanks to everyone who's added this story to their favorites and follows - your encouragement means so much to me, thank you!

Author's Note: Okay, I'll admit it. I got so excited, I just couldn't force myself to wait the usual week or so to update again. This is a huge chapter, not just in size, but in revealing why Temari is the way she is, and the start of her changing into the character we see in Shadows. Again - I really hope I don't give anyone nightmares or anything with this chapter... But thank you so much for reading, and I really hope you enjoy!

*~Chapter X~*

~Trust~

"You want me to do what?!"

Itachi sighed and closed his eyes, just barely resisting the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose in exasperation. Although knowing this wouldn't be easy going in, he'd rather hoped Temari wouldn't react quite so loudly. Or vehemently. Or stare at him with that furious, betrayed look on her face.

"I'm not just going to throw you in," Itachi said patiently. He refrained from stepping closer to Temari, but he didn't move away, either. After all, she had promised to do "anything" so he'd accept Mayonaka. "Don't worry. I'm not going to let it hurt you."

Temari's expression made it clear she didn't believe a single word he said. Her anxious gaze darted from his face, to the lake, and back. "Were you not listening when I told you I hate water?"

Crossing his arms, Itachi followed her gaze, admiring the glassy surface of the water. "There are no waves. It's a warm day with no wind, and very little breeze. The water's gentle. I'll be right with you every step of the way and I promise, I won't let you drown. I won't even let you come close to drowning. We'll take it slowly, with frequent breaks." He didn't like the idea of Temari not knowing how to swim. Even if she hated it, he wanted her to know, just in case she got into trouble and he - or someone else - wasn't around to help her.

"I've managed to make it this far into my life without knowing how to swim," Temari said. "I don't see why I should have to start now."

"You're fortunate you've made it this far," Itachi said. This time he did take a step closer to her, relieved when she didn't try to move away. "We get sent on missions to places with water all the time. It's a miracle nothing's happened yet. You at least need to know the basics of how to swim, even if you're not proficient, so if something does happen, you won't be in danger of immediately drowning."

The corners of Temari's mouth tightened. For a long moment Itachi thought for sure she meant to continue fighting him. Instead she sighed, head and shoulders drooping pitifully as she nodded reluctantly. "All right. You win." She transferred her gaze to the water, staring at it as if she expected it to jump out, grab her, and drag her down of its own accord.

At least Itachi had known from the beginning this wasn't going to be easy, and possessed enough wisdom not to give any hint of the triumph he felt over getting her to agree. "Here," he said, holding out his hand. "Take my hand. Like I said, we'll go slowly, just a step at a time, as you acclimate yourself to the feel of the water."

Temari eyed the appendage for a long couple of minutes, looking like she'd much rather bite it than take hold of it. But finally she placed her hand in his, her expression more like a prisoner being led to the gallows than someone getting a simple swimming lesson.

Yeesh. Curling his fingers reassuringly around Temari's, Itachi led her down to the edge of the water, where they both slipped out of their shoes. He'd put on a pair of cropped pants in expectation of carrying out his plan. Temari, however, wore a pair of lounging pants, long and flowing. He briefly wondered how heavy they would be once they got wet. Regardless, he doubted they'd be going in deeply enough today to make a difference. And even if they did, he'd keep a good grip on her to make sure she didn't slip under or away from him.

They took their first step in tandem, going in ankle-deep at first, allowing the water to lap curiously around their feet as they stood there. Temari tightened her grip convulsively on his hand, her face pale almost to transparency, her eyes so wide he wondered if she'd ever blink again.

"It's all right. I've got you." Itachi felt almost ridiculous saying so, particularly since her fisted free hand kept rising away from her side in his direction, as if she were thinking about punching his lights out. "We'll stay right here until you're ready to take the next step forward."

It took almost ten minutes, but at last Temari gave a tiny nod. Itachi shortened his stride and stepped forward one step and then another, pausing as his companion followed. She bobbled slightly, off-balance, but regained her equilibrium quickly. The water, still calm and smooth and quite comfortably tepid, now caressed their legs halfway up their calves. He watched Temari watch it suspiciously, her lips pressed together so tightly her mouth nearly vanished, and almost felt badly for forcing her into this situation; but he knew how important it was for her to be able to get herself to shore if necessary, or at least stay afloat until help could reach her. When after just five minutes this time they took another step - now in up to their knees - Itachi praised her, telling her he knew she'd conquer the water quickly.

Temari looked much less confident. "How much longer until we can go back to dry land?" she whispered shakily, still not looking away from the water.

Itachi glanced over his shoulder. "We can go now, if you want." Although he'd hoped to go at least to waist-depth, he didn't want to push her too far either, especially on her first day. "Do you want to do that?" He shifted more in front of her and reached for her opposite hand.

"Wait!" Temari tightened her grip on his hand, cutting off what little remained of blood flow to it, her eyes darting away from the water long enough to glance up into his face. He saw a flicker of determination briefly shove back the fear in her eyes before she tilted her head down again. "Let's - just - stand here for a minute."

"All right." Pleased, Itachi settled back to her side, watching as the gentle swells in the water caused by his movement gentled until the surface lay smooth again. "You're doing so well, Temari."

To his surprise, Temari took the initiative this time and took one step, then two, then yet a third forward. Standing in water up to her waist, she relaxed her fist and rested the palm of her hand on the surface, an almost entranced expression supplanting the tension on her face. "It's like silk," she whispered.

"Hn," Itachi agreed, feeling proud. "On a nice warm day like today, with no wind, the water usually does look like glass and feel like silk."

As Temari's death grip on his hand relaxed a little, Itachi glanced back toward the shore. A gentle hill hid them from those up at the house, which was why he'd chosen this particular spot to teach his partner how to get along with the water, if not actually conquer it and swim today. He felt reasonably certain Temari wouldn't have agreed if she knew the entire estate would be able to see her down in the water. He just felt extremely grateful she trusted him enough to follow him into the lake. It briefly occurred to him to wonder what had changed, to make her believe in him enough to do so, but knew he shouldn't ask.

"Do you want to go back?" Itachi eventually offered again.

Temari paused in stroking her free hand over the surface and watching the ripples she created, glancing over her shoulder toward the shore.

"Or do you want to go in deeper?" He didn't think so, but she didn't seem in too big a hurry to turn around and get back to solid ground.

"We'll go back." Her concentration broken, she seemed galvinized into action by Itachi's latter offer. Letting go of his hand, she turned to slosh her way back to the shallows.

"Temari, wait, let me-" He was too late. Evidently one of Temari's feet landed wrong against the somewhat rocky bottom. She twisted at an awkward angle, trying to regain her balance in the unfamiliar medium surrounding her. With a startled and terrified cry, she started to fall.

Itachi lunged forward, ignoring his own shaky foothold in his desperation to get to Temari. He grasped the edge of her loose seafoam green top, then gave a strong yank as he twisted himself, drawing in a sharp breath and holding it as they crashed into the hip-deep water. His back hit the bottom, and he ricocheted. Surging out of the water - still maintaining his white-knuckle grip on Temari's shirt while floundering until he found her waist with his opposite hand - Itachi secured her in a tight grip and hauled them both, gasping and coughing, to shore.

They collapsed on the grass, Itachi keeping his sheltering arms around Temari's violently shuddering form. She clung to him like she thought herself still in the water, fingernails biting through his sodden shirt into his skin; her breathing shallow and rapid, eyes wide and unseeing, pupils tiny, face even whiter than it had been before.

"Temari?" Itachi let go of her waist so he could cup her face in his hands, ducking his head to try to get her to make eye contact with him. "Temari! It's okay, you're out of the water. It's okay."

Water dripped from the ends of her hair and down her face, Itachi sensing more than a few tears fell among the droplets. One of her hands moved from its death grip on his shirt to grasp his arm, but her eyes remained distant and foggy. He knew she saw not the world as it appeared around them now, but as it had been at some point in the past. The rate of her breathing escalated, pushing her toward hyperventilation. Trying to decide how best to snap her out of it, he realized with a start her lips were moving frantically, mouthing words he couldn't hear. He swayed a little closer, placing his ear closer to her mouth to try to discern her words.

"...anything you want to know. Please stop, please, I'll tell you anything...!"

Itachi jerked back, feeling as if someone had impaled him with a flaming hot poker. Pieces rapidly shifted and clicked together in his mind, offering him yet another angle on the story he'd first learned about in Sumi's restaurant the day he arrived in Suna. "Temari!" Curling his hands around her upper arms, he shook her, gently but firmly, desperate to snap her out of her nightmarish memory. "Temari!"

She rattled silently in his hands, pale and unresponsive. Hating himself even as he did it, he shook her even harder, not wanting to resort to what one of his instructors at the Academy had told him to do to snap a person out of shock. He did not condone hitting a woman under any circumstance, for any reason. He wouldn't start now.

"Temari, please," he begged, voice cracking with a thousand emotions he didn't want to name for fear of increasing the guilt threatening to swamp him. Taking her wet face between his hands, he leaned in until their dripping noses nearly touched. "Temari, come back to me, please!"

As if a switch had flipped in her mind, Temari's eyes filled with recognition. Her lips stopped moving, and the desperate rise and fall of her chest eased. "Wh-what happened?" she asked. Her vulnerable eyes flickered from his face, to the water, to their sopping clothes, and back around again.

Itachi shifted his grip back to her arms to pull her into a desperate hug, all but crushing her against his chest. She felt very small and chilled in his arms. "Thank you," he breathed fervently, to whomever was listening. Then, "Temari, I am so sorry. So sorry." The apologies kept tumbling out of his mouth, frantic and heartfelt, as in a far-removed corner of his mind he wondered:

What in the world had he inflicted upon Temari in his misguided impulse to help her?

Images crashed through her mind, cascading one after another until she thought she'd scream. Her pulse pounded in her ears, joined by a distant murmur she dimly recognized, but couldn't name. The world quaked around her, spinning crazily, leaving her terrified to move...

"Temari, please."

The words penetrated the seething maelstrom in her mind, bringing with it a blessed wash of silence. Temari blinked; realized she clung to Itachi like a leech, and they were back on the shore of the lake. She found him staring at her as if she'd suddenly turned into a completely different person before his very eyes. Panic lined his face and filled the depths of his black eyes, threatening to suck her in.

"Wh-what happened?" she croaked. She meant the question as much for herself as Itachi. She remembered standing waist-deep in the water, and it lapping gently, almost curiously, at her as it reached through her clothes and gently caressed her skin, calmly, soothingly. She remembered Itachi's hand around hers, warm, solid, dependable. Even though it grated on every single nerve and every vow she'd made to hate him without ceasing, she knew she could trust him. He wouldn't let her drown. He wouldn't even let her fall.

She trusted she was safe in the water, at least as long as she stayed with him. For now, that was enough.

But then... Water rushing over her, filling her nose and mouth. Was this the time? Was she about to die?

Her train of thought derailed jarringly as Itachi snatched her to him in a desperate hug. He whispered a heartfelt, "Thank you," though to whom she wasn't sure, and then said, "Temari, I am so sorry. So sorry." The words tumbled out of him so fast he nearly stuttered as he repeated his mantra, mumbling the words frantically into her neck.

"Itachi..." She squirmed, uncomfortable at his proximity, at the warmth of his breath on her skin, at the way their wet clothes stuck together... Her claustrophobia, so long repressed, clawed its way into her throat. She planted her hands against his chest and forcibly shoved him away.

He rocked backwards, catching himself on one hand before he fell over. His babbling silenced, he stared at her, ebony eyes flickering from emotion to emotion so fast she couldn't identify even one before it vanished in the wake of the next. "What happened?" he turned the question back on her.

Despite the comfortabe warmth of the day, Temari felt a chill run along her arms and down her spine. She wrapped her arms around herself, knowing there was no way she could worm out of explaining things now. Not when evidently she'd just completely - embarrassingly - gone to pieces in front of Itachi.

She hadn't had a reaction that bad for almost four years. She'd thought she was past all that, but the water...

She should have said no. She should have turned and walked away. Or, even though the idea galled, begged him to ask something else of her. She should have known there was no way she could get that close to water and not pay the consequences.

Pushing strands of her dripping hair away from her eyes, she shook her head. "I'm all right," she said, even though she wasn't. She voiced the words in spite of knowing they didn't answer his question, though she hoped he wouldn't notice. "S-Sorry about that. I'm not usually so clumsy."

Itachi's large, rough, warm hands folded around her upper arms once more. For a moment she thought for sure he was going to shake her again. Instead he stared right into her eyes and shook his head slowly, pointedly. "Being clumsy does not explain what happened after I got you out of the water," he said, voice low and intent.

Swallowing back the urge to slap Itachi's hands away again, Temari turned her head so he wouldn't be able to see her face - or, specifically, her eyes. "I told you," she said softly, "I hate water."

She heard him suck in a sharp breath, aggravation punctuating the sound. "Why were you saying you'd tell me anything, if only I'd stop?"

Temari's heart nearly fluttered to a halt. Stupid! Even though she'd lost it, she didn't think she'd said anything. She thought she had at least that much control over herself. But now, she'd blown it. And since she couldn't seem to do anything halfway, she'd blown it epically.

"I can't talk about it." Please, just drop it and leave it alone.

"Can't, or won't?" Itachi's tone was sharp enough to slice through solid steel.

She flinched. Immediately, his hands loosened around her arms, though he didn't let go entirely. His right hand began to move, smoothing up and down her arm as if to warm her. "Please don't make me talk about it." She scrambled for something else to say, something to ensure he'd drop the subject, preferably never to bring it up again, but at the least for now. "It was just a - momentary - thing. I'm fine now, though. It won't happen again." Of course she couldn't promise that, not with the absolute certainty with which she tried to infuse her words, but she'd work on it.

Oh, and she would also passionately avoid having anything to do with water again, which had certainly helped her keep it from happening until now.

She stole a sideways peek at Itachi, who looked very stern, his expression abruptly reminding her of Gaara when he was in full-on leader-of-the-village mode. This is all your fault. She swallowed back the words trying to batter their way past her teeth, somehow knowing putting voice to them would not help her situation. "I'm fine," she whispered again. It didn't sound convincing, even to her.

"Can you promise me on your oath as a ninja that this will never be an issue again on a mission in the future? Or even for this mission?" His tone cautioned her to think over her response very carefully before she gave it.

Her confidence shriveled in the face of his question as easily as her skin had in the water. She knew the answer she wanted to give - the one she always gave the few times she'd been asked that question in the past, mostly by Gaara: a resounding, Yes! But the glaring truth pricked at her conscience. She silently bowed her head and shook it slowly back and forth.

Itachi let out his breath on a long sigh, which stirred her wet bangs across her forehead. "I don't know what happened, though I think I have some idea," he said. "I know I just let you down in a major way in the water, and I'm sorry. But I want to try to make up for that. I want you to trust me, and tell me what happened, and let me try to help you." This time both his hands rubbed up and down her arms, the motion warming, soothing.

The jittery feeling deep in her bones eased a bit at his touch. Her breath shivered out of her, and she felt her resolve to hoard the experience to herself melt away. "All right," she said, defeated. "I'll tell you - after we go back up to the house and change into dry clothes." At least it would give her a short reprieve, and time to think of how to explain things to Itachi in a detached way that would keep her from completely reliving the terror, the awfulness, of it all.

He studied her face, as if testing the level of truth in her words. At last he seemed to decide she fully meant what she said, because he nodded decisively before letting her go. "Will you be okay, returning to the house?"

Temari reached out to pick up her shoes, glad to see the violent tremors in her hands had eased to a barely discernable tremble. "I am a ninja," she said as they stood. "That means I am also a good actress." And keeping the staff in the house from figuring out she'd just had a total mental and emotional breakdown at the lake would certainly qualify her for her best performance ever - if she could pull it off.

Thankfully Matsuri wasn't around to fuss over her. Temari quickly bathed and changed into some dry clothes before settling down in her sitting room with a cup of tea to wait for Itachi. While she sipped, she thought out what she would say, and how to say it. She'd told this story only once before, to Gaara; she'd hoped then that would be the end of it. But she knew Itachi deserved to know the truth, especially since her little brother didn't seem interested in letting either of them get different partners for missions any time soon.

When Itachi finally knocked on the door, Temari didn't even bother to get up to let him in. Instead, she called a tired, "Enter," watching as he cautiously opened it and peered around, as if expecting her to throw some shuriken at him or something.

...Pity she hadn't thought of that.

Once assured no sharp projectiles were headed his direction, Itachi slipped through the door and closed it behind himself. Crossing the room, he lowered himself onto the cushion Temari indicated with a wave of her hand, then accepted the tea cup she handed him.

And then they just sat and stared at each other silently, appraisingly, for a long few moments. Temari didn't want to be the first to speak, and Itachi seemed just as determined to stay quiet for however long it took. Their stalemate stretched, the tension ratcheting up with each passing second.

Finally Itachi released a silent breath, looked down at his teacup and said, "Whenever you're ready, I'll listen."

Oddly gratified Itachi had been the one to break their stalemate, Temari looked down at her own cup, noticing steam had stopped rising from it at some point. Sighing, she shoved the delicate thing away and lifted her gaze again, fixing it on Itachi's chin. No way she could look him in the eyes and tell this story. Not if she expected to get even halfway through it.

"As you know, five years ago I was sent out on a mission that - went wrong," she began. She tried to keep her tone factual, the telling itself as impersonal as possible. "I went with two other people - Sumi's husband, Hikaru, and another Suna ninja by the name of Kei. Together, we formed a team pretending to switch allegiances from our home village to Kiri, also known as-"

"Blood Mist Village," Itachi finished for her on a whisper. Suddenly he looked a little sick.

Temari nodded. "Tensions between Kiri and Suna had been running unusually high prior to it. Our mission was to be accepted into the village so we could find out if they were planning some sort of attack against us. If possible, we were to sneak into the head of the village's office and steal scrolls detailing battle plans and tactics, if such things existed."

"But the mission didn't go as planned," Itachi supplied when Temari paused again. He'd abandoned his own cup of tea to sit leaning slightly forward on his cushion. From the top edge of her vision she saw his dark eyes fixed intently on her face. He seemed to be trying to offer her strength and support, both things unexpected but welcome.

"I suppose it is a small, cold comfort to know our mission was doomed from the very beginning." Temari had still been young and idealistic then. She was the daughter of the former leader of the village, and sister of the future. She felt invincible, like every mission on which she was sent could not go wrong. It made her failure that much worse. "Kei was slightly older than both me and Hikaru, though he looked our age. He had been a staunch - albeit silent - supporter of my father's bloody imagined future for our village. When my father was murdered and Gaara announced as our next leader, several in Suna were not happy about it. Kei was smarter than most - outwardly, he pretended to support Gaara and his image of what Suna should be, but behind the scenes, he worked in opposition."

Itachi's expression twisted with understanding, the depths of his eyes reflecting the sorrow she still felt in her own heart. It didn't make her attempt to keep things impersonal any easier, but for some reason knowing he felt that way made it easier to continue with the rest of the story.

"Since Kiri was already what my father had wanted Suna to be, Kei found his desired opportunity. He'd already defected by the time we were sent on the mission, though obviously none of us had any idea of it. He knew why we were there, and it didn't take long at all before he sold Hikaru and me out to the Kiri ninja." She still remembered that night so vividly.

Across the table, Itachi muttered an epithet to which Temari nodded agreement.

"The night everything went wrong, we had planned to sneak into the Kiri leader's office. Of course, the entire village is made up of ninja, and no one pretends otherwise. Everyone crept about in the shadows, but we went even deeper, moving from the barracks in which we'd been assigned to stay to the massive building in the very center of the village. It was raining - nothing new, but it gave us another advantage. Though everyone in Kiri is used to the rain, no one particularly likes being out in it. So we had to avoid fewer people along the way."

Shifting to allow the blood flow back into her right foot, which was falling asleep, Temari rubbed her hands up her arms, trying to chase away the chills racing each other across her skin. "Kei had a whole group waiting for us when we got there. He immediately turned on us, and the fight didn't last long before Hikaru and I were captured." The fight had been short and bloody. Though they'd both done a good bit of damage to the other side, they were horribly outnumbered. And once Hikaru had taken that katana strike to the side...

Her eyelids slammed shut. Focus. Breathe. You can make it through this, Temari. Itachi needs to hear this. You might not want to do it, but perhaps you need to tell it as much as he needs to know it.

Warm hands enveloped her own, clenched into fists atop the table. Temari's eyes flew open, and she stared at Itachi, who looked back calmly, encouragingly. "It's all right," he said softly. "No matter what happened, I won't hate or think badly of you. I promise."

Though Temari had tensed at the touch, catching herself up on the edge of striking out, she relaxed at Itachi's soothing words. Nodding once, she drew in a shuddering breath. "Though Kei was able to give them quite a bit of intelligence about Suna, he didn't know nearly everything. Not as much as me, a Sabaku." Her lips twisted derisively. "Obviously he'd told them who I was, so they immediately zeroed in on me as the best source of information available. It didn't take them long to realize I wouldn't crack so easily, so..." She faltered again. No, no, I can't do this. What was I thinking?

Itachi's hands vanished from around her own. Surprised, Temari opened her eyes, watching as he stood, came around the table, and knelt next to her. Settling in, he reached out his hands and grasped hers again, his thumbs gently kneading her palms as he watched her silently, patiently. As he'd said, he was in this for the long haul. He'd keep listening no matter how long it took her to force the words out.

Allowing the effects of Itachi's ministrations on her hands to flow up her arms, through her shoulders, and into her neck, she felt the tension in her muscles begin to relax - and with it, the difficulty of telling her tale. Letting her eyelids slide shut again, she went on in a voice barely above a whisper. "Hikaru had been injured in the ambush. I tried to patch him up as best I could, but without proper supplies, there wasn't much I could do. Nothing mattered to them." She spat the word with all the venom she still held captive in her heart. "They tried to use him to get me to talk. Kei led the way, shouting questions at me while his new comrades took turns holding Hikaru's head under water. There - there were several times I thought he'd drowned, but he always came back up gasping, still breathing. Still alive. Still fighting, despite his wound, despite the infection, despite..." She bit her lip savagely until it bled. I will not cry. I did not cry then, and I will not now. Do not show weakness. Do not dishonor Hikaru that way, Temari!

"We both knew we couldn't let any information about Suna slip," Temari continued haltingly. She drew in a few deep breaths, trying to draw the calm Itachi offered her around her like a comforting cloak. "Clear up until the end, Hikaru kept telling me not to tell them anything. That he didn't matter. I knew what he wasn't saying." She could still see his wide amber eyes begging her not to give up any secrets which would endanger Suna - and, more than that, endanger his Sumi. He was willing to die for his village, but more than that, he was willing to die if it meant keeping his beloved wife safe.

He had been willing to die - and, ultimately, he had.

Opening her eyes, Temari fixed her somewhat hazy gaze on her hands, still clasped in Itachi's. Even all these years later, she could still see Hikaru's blood on her hands, on her clothes, on her skin. She could feel it on her cheeks, in her hair. She had not been allowed to bathe after trying to staunch Hikaru's bleeding, and if she let down her guard, she could still see every single thing she looked at dripping red. Squeezing her eyes shut again, she shuddered.

"Hikaru's death meant nothing to them - no more than his life had. They could no longer use him as leverage, but they had other ideas." Unconsciously she pulled her legs up to her chest, curling herself into as tiny a ball as she could. "They would do the same thing to me all day. At sunset they would force food into me, then put me in a little wooden box and suspend it over a tank of icy cold water. If I moved even the slightest bit, the delicate balance would tip and I would plunge into the water. They would leave me for a while as the box filled with water, until I thought this really was the end for me, too, then pull me up and leave me again."

She opened her eyes just in time to see what little color Itachi had left in his cheeks drain away. He stared at her with night-black eyes filled with equal parts sorrow and hatred - the former, she knew, for her and the latter for those who had imprisoned and tortured her. On some distant level she felt surprised at the strength of both those emotions, ones he held for, and on behalf of, a woman he barely knew.

"It was the middle of winter. The nights were so cold, and the tank was outdoors. I learned quickly not to sleep at night, for if I did I could not keep myself from moving unconsciously. I still am not sure how I kept from freezing to death those first couple of nights, after plunging into the cold water and staying wet all night. I suppose the box must have kept out just enough of the cold air to keep me alive." Though she had wished she would die. Sometimes she given serious consideration to moving so she could plunge into that water and drown, just to escape.

"How long...?" Itachi's voice sounded rough, strained.

Temari did not look up at him. "Hikaru lasted five days. After that, I was there almost two weeks."

Itachi's long sigh sent warm breath fluttering across the top of her head and down the back of her neck. She shivered, partly at the sensation, partly at her own nightmarish memories. "I wouldn't have lasted much longer. I had tried to escape twice, and almost made it both times, but Kei knew me too well. After that, I just kept getting weaker, and I knew for sure I was going to die there." She had almost given up to the tiredness, the coldness: wet, beaten down, and unsure how much longer she could endure everything without giving in, just so she could rest. Even though she'd known, logically, giving them what they wanted would only hasten her death...

She was silent for longer than she thought, for Itachi finally gently prompted, "What happened then?"

Opening her eyes, she finally forced herself to look up and meet his eyes. "My brothers. Though Gaara, mostly. They sneaked into Kiri, and between the two of them did a lot of damage in a really short amount of time. They rescued me, and then we all got out of there as fast as we could." She had not found out until later - much later - Gaara had had a bad feeling about the mission. He had done some covert digging after their departure from Suna and ultimately discovered Kei's treachery. Instantly knowing how the mission must have gone, he and Kankuro had mounted their rescue mission.

"And what of that ba-" Itachi stopped, biting off the word with obvious reluctance, though embarrassment brought a little color back into his cheeks. Starting again, he asked in a much calmer tone, "And what of Kei?"

That was something else Temari had found out later. "Gaara had to go through him to get to me. The fight was short, bloody, and not much of a challenge for my little brother." She only wished she had been the one to deliver the killing blow. But she still felt gratified, avenged, knowing Kei's death had not been a merciful one at her deadly brother's hands. "Even now, five years later, Kiri is trying to recoup from the blow the Sabaku siblings dealt them." She grinned briefly, fiercely, proudly. "Eventually they might reorganize their forces and attack Suna, but after that little demonstration, I doubt it will be any time soon. Probably not as longer as my brother is alive." It had been the single most powerful demonstration of her brother's abilities. She still heard whispers about it when she went on missions - though she hadn't been back to Kiri since - and was recognized as his sister. In some cases, it helped her get through her mission easier, and in some cases, it hindered her. But she wouldn't trade having Gaara for a brother for all the easy missions in the world.

"That's why you freeze at the thought of getting near water, let alone in it." Itachi nodded as if a final missing puzzle piece had slipped into place in his mind. "I thought it strange the incident when we were young made you feel that vehemently about water..."

Temari nodded. "It's my last really big fear. I still feel uneasy in tight spaces, but I don't go into panic attacks any more. And I no longer fear the darkness." In fact, it had become her refuge. As long as she embraced the darkness, she didn't have to see the blood.

Itachi's eyes brimmed with comprehension. "And that's why you kept talking about blood. I understand now." Releasing one of her hands, he reached up to brush the side of her face with the edge of his index finger, a grateful expression on his handsome features. "Thank you for telling me your story," he said. "I know it cannot have been easy."

Fighting the urge to pull away from his touch, Temari simply nodded again, unsure of what to say. It had been difficult, but deep inside herself, she felt somehow better, in a way she'd not felt since coming home from that mission. As if talking things out with a partner, and not just her brother, helped her deal with them. She felt an unanticipated sense that she could actually start putting them in the past, not just think about doing so.

Releasing her, Itachi slowly stood and returned to his side of the table. After settling back onto his own cushion, he looked at her again and addressed her solemnly. "I promise, I'll not force you back into the water again. I am sorry I did so this time, and dragged those horrible memories back into the forefront of your mind."

Temari shook her head. "It's not your fault. You couldn't have known. And I think - I think this has been good for me." She felt drained, but not in a bad way. She felt as if she could go to bed and finally get a good night's sleep, without worrying about whether the nightmares would revisit her again.

He eyed her suspiciously, as if trying to decide if she were telling the truth or not. At last, having apparently decided she was, he smiled slightly and said, "I'm glad my blundering managed to turn out to be of some benefit, then."

A laugh spurted out of her before she could stop it, taking Temari by surprise. Clapping her hand over her mouth, she stared at Itachi over the table, noting the gleam in his own dark eyes. Dropping her hand, she laughed along with him, so relieved to be able to do so. She hadn't been able to laugh so freely, so genuinely, since before that horrible mission.

After five long years, her healing process had finally, truly, begun.

*~To Be Continued~*

Author's Ending Notes: Okay, I am so excited, I just couldn't keep myself from updating early. This is a huge chapter, not just in size, but in revealing why Temari is the way she is, and the start of her changing into the character we see in Shadows. It was both easy and hard to write - easy, because I understand Temari's fear of the water so well (I'm just as terrified of it as she, but for different reasons, obviously), and hard for pretty much the same reason. Not to mention the intense nature of her confession, and there were so many times when I just had to walk away from the chapter and regain my emotional equilibrium. I was in tears a few times writing it. So if you've made it this far, thank you so much for reading this chapter, and I hope I don't give anyone nightmares or anything. I hope to see you again next chapter.