Chapter Eleven

Time Jump-Thanksgiving Break

Clary POV:

Thanksgiving was today and I was nervous about the whole night. Since Jon was traded to the Giants, my parents wanted to have a family thanksgiving for the first time ever, and to make things even weirder, they invited the Lightwoods. I think it has something to do with wanting to know who was staying in their house for three months, but I was still scared. Nothing good can come out of this, and it was only going to take one thing until shit hit the fan, and I was dreading when that happens.

I was in my room getting dressed, having to please my mother again was really annoying but it was one less thing to fight about today so I put on an emerald green dress, with black heels, and my black leather jacket. I curled my hair and did my make up, and I was staring at my reflection in the mirror wondering when all of this torture was going to end, I hated pretending to be my mothers little Barbie doll, and I couldn't wait until I was actually in charge of my own life. I was pulled out of my mind when I heard the doorbell ring. I took a deep breath and made my way down stairs. When I entered the living room the entire Lightwood family was there, and instantly I was relaxed. They all looked really good, I told them tonight was going to be fancy, since that's the only thing my mother knows, and I hope that status and money weren't going to be brought up.

We all made our way into the dinning room where everything was just way to expensive for anyone's taste but my parents. We all took our seats and for the first 10 minutes it was quiet while we were being served the soup and salad. I looked over at Jace and the rest of the Lightwoods and they all looked extremely uncomfortable, which I can't blame them. I was uncomfortable too. After another 5 minutes my mother decided to break the silence.

"So, Maryse is it?" Mrs. Lightwood nodded. "Were you able to find a nice house after you moved out of here?"

"Yes. I finally got a job, so it took a lot of pressure off of Robert, and now being a two income family we were able to find a house back in our town that is a little cramped but we make it work."

"That's wonderful, I can't even imagine having four kids." My mother started, and I knew she was going to say something to diminish me. "I mean getting one of mine to accomplish something was hard enough. I can't imagine having two more kids that are like Clarissa." I sighed and let my head fall a little until I felt a hand on my knee. I looked up and Jace was smiling at me, and it made me feel worthy, and that's all that mattered.

"What's wrong with Clary?" Maryse asked and I wish she would have just let it go, but I guess she was so shocked that it kinda slipped out, cause the look on her face said she regretted saying it in the first place.

"She's a disappointment. Always has been. I had another one so that Valentine and I couldn't have two picture perfect children, and let's just say when she was about 5 or 6, she just shut down. She stopped listening to me, and it took all my might to get her to even look good enough to be let out in the public's eye." She looked over at Jonathan and smiled. "Now this one, he was a perfect child, if I could have replicated him I would have." Maryse just nodded and let it go. But unfortunately Jonathan wasn't going to let that happen.

"Mother, you shouldn't speak to Clary like that." He said and I could tell he was holding back his anger, he didn't want it to escalate anything farther but he clearly wanted her to know what she said was wrong.

"And why shouldn't I? She's my child, I can speak to her however I want too." I can tell that this slightly pushed him over the edge because his fists clenched.

"Oh please, like you've ever treated her like your child. You treat her like the bloody plague, and you know, I can't believe she's put up with it for this long."

"What are you talking about Jonathan? You've never spoken to me like this." My mom said and I could tell she was upset with his tone.

"I never spoke to you like this because I threw myself into football so I wouldn't have to be around you."

"No, you threw yourself into football to make something of yourself and make us proud."

"No I didn't. I didn't even like football at first I've I'm being completely honest. I started playing because I wanted out of this house. I wanted to be around my friends. I started playing because after every game my friends parents would take me out to dinner with them and I got a chance to be apart of a real family. It wasn't until I was a junior in high school that I started to love the sport. And that's when I started playing for myself. You guys are the coldest parents I've ever met." Jonathan was on full on break down and I just grabbed Jace's hand under the table and waited for it to be over.

"How can you say that? We've provided you and Clarissa with everything you could ever want or need."

"Yea, every material thing on this planet you got us, but the only thing that ever truly mattered was love and you've never given that out. I mean, do you two even love each other? Or is that all for show too?"

"Jonathan." My fathers voiced boomed, but Jonathan wasn't backing down.

"No. You need to hear this. You need to hear how horrible it's been to be your child, and how completely oblivious you've been to Clary." I instantly stiffened, this is not how I expected this night to go, but if Jonathan lets this slip in a fit of rage I don't know what I'm going to do.

"What are you talking about?" My father asked.

"Jesus, come on. You two can't seriously be this thick? Just look at Clary, look at Clarissa and tell me what you see?" My parents both looked at me but didn't say anything. "Oh for the love of god. You two are the worst parents in the world." He took a deep breath and than started to shake his head.

"I don't know what you're trying to accomplish here Jonathan but you're making no sense." My mother said.

"The reason Clary is so completely depressed and driven to suicide is because you two missed the most horrific thing that happened to Clary." Now I was tense and I was begging Jonathan to stop talking but I could tell he wasn't done. "Uncle Hodge was fucking molesting Clary for four years!" He yelled and my head immediately dropped. Jace's arms were around me, and my parents gasped.

"My brother wouldn't do that." My father said.

"Jonathan you are making ridiculous accusations against a dead man, let him rest in peace."

"No. That piece of shit deserves his grave spit on and destroyed. Tell them Clary, tell them what happened and show them how awful they are." I looked up to see my parents eyes on me. I looked at Jace who was drawing circles on my back. I took a deep breath and decided that it was time.

"I was six…" I said and I looked at my mother. "You were going to Spain to be at the opening of your gallery there. Dad was staying in the city for the week, and Jonathan was at a football camp. He offered to babysit me, because I wasn't allowed to go with you mom. Do you remember why I wasn't allowed?" She shook her head. "You told dad that I was 'miserable to be around and I would ruin your night' so I was stuck at home with him. The first time it happened I didn't even know what was happening. I was asleep. I was laying in my bed with my teddy bear and my pink blanket tucked around me when I woke up to him rubbing in between my legs." My father looked stunned and my mother was unreadable. "When you came back you noticed that I was different but he told you that I was sick that week but not to worry because he took really good care of me." I was crying at this point, but they should know that this happened. "Uncle Hodge would tell me how beautiful I was, or how he was going to have so much fun with me when I was older. Thankfully, that fucker died, cause I can only imagine how much more fun he would have had with me behind your back since I never mattered anyway."

"Clarissa." My mother started but I cut her off.

"He molested me for four years mom. Four years I was being touched and kissed and rubbed by that man, and you two didn't even care. You weren't around enough to know that I was dying. I was completely hollow but you couldn't be bothered. You didn't care about my problems, as long as you bought me the nicest car or the most expensive outfit you thought I'd be fine. Well guess what, I wasn't fine. I'm not fine, and I tried to kill myself because I felt like I wasn't good enough for anyone, especially you. I was just a big disappointment isn't that right mother? I never did anything right, and I was a constant grey cloud in your life. The black sheep of the family so to speak. But I only got that way because your brother took advantage of an innocent girl, but what would you know about that? You were never around long enough to notice how he looked at me, or how he would interact with me. I was a burden. And not worthy enough of your attention, or your love." Everything was eerily silent.

"Now do you understand why I said you two were the worst? God, your own daughter, your little girl dad was being tainted by your own brother and you didn't even care."

"We didn't know. She never said anything."

"That's because he would hit her, and threaten her. And why would she? You wouldn't have cared anyway." Jonathan was a loose cannon and I felt Jace shift beside me and stand. He put his hand on Jonathan's shoulder.

"Jonathan, I think you need to calm down, clearly this isn't going to be resolved tonight." He said and than my mother stood up.

"Shut up." My mother said in her normal harsh tone. "You have no business involved in this family."

"He's more apart of this family than you are. He is the only reason Clary is still alive, why she's happy, why she is loved for the first time in her life. Jace has every right to be involved in family business." I couldn't help but smile at everything Jon said about Jace because it was true. He was a huge reason why I'm still around.

"He will never be worthy of being involved in this family. He may have been able to manipulate the lose screw but he will never be good enough to be apart of the Morgenstern family." I couldn't take it anymore. I stood up and ran upstairs to my room and into my bathroom. I was looking frantically for an unused razor. Once I found one I broke it apart. I stripped out of my dress and lay in the bathtub and began to cut. I needed a release and after a couple minutes I slowly began to drift off into darkness.

Jace POV:

After Clary ran off, I decided to stay for a couple more minutes to calm Jonathan down. This wasn't how I wanted to spend my thanksgiving, but I was glad I was here when this finally was revealed.

"Come on Jon, you need to go take a walk or something. Cool down. This isn't helping anyone right now." He nodded, threw his napkin on the table and walked out of the house. I looked at my family. "Why don't you all head home. I'm sure you can salvage this thanksgiving." They all nodded and Maryse gave me a hug before they were gone. It was just her parents and I. I took a deep breath. "I know this is a lot of information to take in, and I know it's a hard subject, but it's true. Everything Clary told you was the truth. You may not want to accept it, but it happened. And as much as you dislike me being with your daughter, I'm not going anywhere any time soon. I love her, and I plan on keeping her for the rest of my life. Her happiness means everything to me. So please, just keep your distance until you're ready to discuss this in a mature matter. I don't want her to be too overwhelmed." I left before they could say anything. When I made it to Clary's room I knocked but there was no answer. I opened the door and she wasn't there. I made my way into her room and still no sign of her. The bathroom door was semi opened and when I walked over and opened it Clary was laying in the bathtub covered in blood.

"Clary."