1Kisame's First Few days at Akatsuki

I do own Naruto!!! psyche. I don't. I just manipulate the characters to do my bidding. That is all.

Episode 11: The Mystery of the Stolen Wallet.

Police borders saying "DO NOT CROSS, POLICE AT WORK" surrounded every nook and cranny of the Akatsuki building. They even put it around Zetsu, thinking he was a house plant. What was all the commotion about? The title of the chapter should've told you, but I'll tell you: KISAME'S WALLET HAS BEEN STOLEN!! Who did it? I know, but you don't. You aren't supposed to anyway. Why did they do it? I still have yet to think about it, but I'll get around to it. Why Kisame? Because he's the new kid. Well, starting last week. But he's just too fun to mess with.

Kisame was on the floor crying his ass off, Itachi just watching. "Kisame... it was just a wallet... you can get a new one. And besides, what would you have in a wallet anyway? We don't get paid to be evil." Itachi said, actually trying to comfort him. "IT HAD $5,000,000.02!!! HOW CAN I REPLACE 5 MILLION DOLLARS!?! And two cents."Kisame yelled. A policeman came up to him and held up a picture. "Hi. My name is officer Hughes. And this is My daughter Elicia!! ISN'T SHE CUTE!?!" He said. Hughes had good intentions, he was actually thinking that his daughter's picture would cheer him up a little. But, Kisame just shaved the picture with his sword. Hughes gasped, along with officer Edward Elric, who was very short for his age, Officer Roy Mustang, who was very good with fire, And officer Riza Hawkeye, who was a very skilled gun... woman. Officer Havoc, who was a lot like Asuma-sensei (coughChainSmokercough), Officer Kain Feury, who looked like a middle schooler, and Officer Falman, who had a memory that defied the laws of physics.

Maes Hughes was kneeling on the floor, mourning over the loss of one of his precious Elicia pictures. Edward, since he was so small, searched all the small spaces of the house, finding many paper bombs in the most awkward places. Under the toilet, in between every wall, and in Kisame's bed too. Lord knows when they would go off. Meanwhile, Officer Falman was interrogating Kisame of the past crime. "So... what happened exactly?" He asked. "Well..." Kisame began his story.

Flashback no Jutsu! (BOOM)

"La-di da -di-daaa... I gots five million and two cents in my wallet! " Kisame sang. Then, out of the blue. A mysterious man came up and punched him, knocking him out cold. The next thing he knew, his wallet was gone.

Reversed Flashback no jutsu! (BOOM)

"... so you sang... that you had 5 million in your wallet... okay... not exactly the wisest choice, but fine." Falman said. "Officer Mustang. I have the info. Here." Falman handed the paper to Roy. "He sang!? What an idiot... why do I always get the weird cases?" Roy said. Okay... so... what do you remember about how he looked. Well... he had... Green hair... half of his face was black... the other half white. 'Tis a weird one I'd say." Kisame said, now wearing an eyepatch like a pirate. "Ok... fine. We'll have to first interrogate everyone in the organization. Havoc, you take care of that. You go with him too Hawkeye." Roy commanded. "Sir!" both said.

"Ok... everyone gather and put your name on this clipboard. We'll use this to call in and check out all in the Organization." Riza said.

"Okay... first up is... Itachi Uchiha." Havoc called. "Will Itachi Uchiha please come into the Interrogation room." Itachi walked in. In about five seconds flat, he came out again. "O-ok.. Next up is Ivana Tinkle. Everybody! IVANA TINKLE!!" Havoc called. "Is that Havoc?" Feury asked. "You don't want to know." Falman said. Everybody laughed. Even Riza Hawkeye laughed. "What... OH YOU- YOU SONS OF BITCHES!!" Havoc yelled. "(laugh) ok... who's REALLY next up is Deidera. Please come in. In about 3 minutes he came out again. "What an interesting story... uhm... Deidera. Next is... Havoc, you want to announce it?" Riza asked. "Ok... uh... Isaac Balls. Aw shit..." Havoc said. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" Everybody laughed. "Ok Havoc... I know how to lure the culprit out of the crowd..." Riza said. Repeat after me: I am" "I am" "Sofa King" "Sofa King" We Todd Ed" "We Todd Ed" Havoc finished. "Now, say it really fast." Riza ordered. "IamSofaKingWeToddEd" "no,, no. Not that fast. It loses meaning. "I am so fing retarded" was how it turned out. Everybody laughed again.

ME \: I'm going to make this a 2-part chapter ok? So wait for the next chapter.