Hey guys. This will be a bit of a different setup, but it'll still revolve around the same people! Here is the Flu Season chappie so please enjoy! And, for those of you who like gross stuff, this is your thing! And Uncle P's kind of going to be a regular character now…if I can find a spot for him. He's such a jerk and it's fun writing a chapter with him in it!
CHAPTER 10
When Jason woke up the following morning, his throat hurt him too much to talk. His head was pounding, and his stomach was rumbling in a weird way.
"Daddy? I don't feel good today," Jason told Aeson.
Aeson felt his son's forehead. "Good thing I called Ms. Hecate," he smiled. "You're running a fever. Why don't you go back upstairs and lie down?"
Jason shrugged and headed back upstairs. He slumped down onto his bed and looked at the clock (although he didn't know what time it was because he couldn't read numbers yet). It must be time for school because I don't hear the cars outside, he thought to himself. And it wasn't too long after this when he started throwing up.
Phaethon came running down the stairs the next morning, all ready for school to start. Helios and Clymene were drinking coffee together at the table.
"Hey, kiddo," said Helios. "You ready for school today?"
"Yes! I'm going to make a mud pie this morning during playtime."
"Well, that sounds great," said Clymene. "What would you like for break—why's your face all red, dear?"
"It's not red, Mommy."
"Yes, honey. It is."
Phaethon folded his arms.
"Isn't there a bug going around the school?" asked Helios.
"I guess so," said Clymene, touching her son's forehead. "You're burning up, sweetheart. I want you to go upstairs and sleep today."
"But what about my mud pie?"
"When you're better, you can make a mud pie," said Helios firmly.
A little while later, Helios went to drive his sun chariot across the sky and Clymene stayed home with her sick son. She didn't really see him all morning. But she saw him throwing up when she came upstairs to check on him around lunchtime.
"Oh, honey," she cooed over him, "do you want to take a warm bath?"
Phaethon puked some more. "Y-yes, Mommy," he sobbed into her shoulder.
"Okay."
So Clymene took Phaethon into the bathroom and put him in the tub for a while before she made him some chicken soup.
When Helios got back from his day up in the sky, Phaethon and Clymene were on the couch. Phaethon was asleep on his mother's lap and Clymene was watching a movie.
"How's he doing?" Helios asked as he kissed his wife.
"He was throwing up all day today…with diarrhea," said Clymene. "So Miss Hestia said to keep him home until the fever breaks."
"Class," said Ms. Psyche the next morning, "as you may know, a lot of the other kids here have gotten sick. I just want to let you know not to share any forks, spoons, or cups until this flu is gone. Make sure you wash your hands after playtime, after using the bathroom, and before you eat. Yes, Phobos?"
"Can we share toys, Ms. Psyche?"
"Yes, you can share toys. Just don't put anything in your mouths. Because this flu isn't pretty."
"Is it the puke kind?" asked Andromeda.
"Yes, honey," said Ms. Psyche. "It is the puke kind."
"My mommy doesn't like puke," said Andromeda. "So no one get me sick!"
Jason sneezed. Ms. Psyche still couldn't believe Aeson would send his still-sick kid off to preschool.
"Well, let's have some free time," suggested Ms. Danaë. "Everyone find a spot in the room to play!"
The four friends—Phaethon, Bellerophon, Jason, and Perseus (minus Phaethon, of course)—were hanging out over by the sensory table. All three of them were picking up sand and trying to make sand castles with them.
"Do you puke a lot with this?" asked Theseus.
"Yeah," said Jason. "My tummy still kinda hurts, too."
"Did you get that thing where your body gets hotter?" asked Bellerophon. "I still don't know what that's called."
"I think it's called a fever," said Jason. "Yeah. Mine got really high, too."
"Sweet," said Theseus.
"No," Jason snapped. "Not sweet!"
"Jason, how are you feeling?" asked Ms. Psyche.
"I feel good, Ms. Psyche," Jason replied. "My tummy kinda hurts but I feel good."
"That's good, honey—"
"Ms. Psyche," said Ms. Danaë, "I'm going to take Makaria down to the office. She's not feeling very well."
"Okay, Ms. Danaë."
Makaria walked with her teacher to Miss Hestia's office, where they found Miss Hestia in the middle of eating an apple. "Good morning," Miss Hestia said, putting the apple down on her desk. "What's going on today?"
"Makaria's not feeling very well," said Ms. Danaë.
"Uh-oh," said Miss Hestia. "Makaria, let's call Mommy."
A few minutes later, Persephone walked into the office, clutching her purse. "Hi, honey," she cooed to her daughter. "Are you feeling sick today?"
Makaria nodded soberly.
"Well, I think we'll head out," said Persephone.
On the way home in the car, Makaria puked all over herself and the car seat, so poor Persephone had to clean it up.
"I'm sorry, Mommy," Makaria said as Persephone carried her into the house.
"It's okay, honey," Persephone said bitterly. "Mommy knows you didn't mean it."
Meanwhile, back at Ms. Hecate's, the kids were still having free time. Hebe and Fructus were playing with the cars in the quiet corner. Perseus and Andromeda were doing a puzzle together in the math corner. Hedone and Deimos were drawing pictures in the arts and crafts corner. The other kids were scattered all throughout the classroom. Some were reading, some were drawing, and some were walking around trying to figure out what to do next.
Ms. Psyche was hanging out with Perseus and Andromeda, who were now interested in the pretend kitchen area. "What are you two making?" she asked.
"I'm making fish," said Perseus.
"I'm making a cake for my daddy," said Andromeda.
"Andromeda, do you and Mommy ever play together?" asked Ms. Psyche.
"No."
"How come?"
"'Cause she's mean to me. She's always yelling at me and every time I ask her to play with me, she calls me mean things and sends me to my room."
"Oh, my…" Ms. Psyche said pensively.
Meanwhile, Ms. Danaë was in the house corner with Hebe and Fructus, who were having an argument over a doll.
"Ms. Danaë, tell Fructus only girls can have babies!" Hebe yelled.
"But it's pretend," said Fructus. "So boys can have babies, too!" Just to prove it, Fructus put a baby under his shirt to make him look pregnant.
"Fructus, Hebe's right. Only girls can have babies," Ms. Danaë said matter-of-factly.
"Ha!" Hebe screamed, sticking out her tongue. "Got ya, farm dude!"
"But," Ms. Danaë stressed, "it's important that you have a dad in your baby's life because dads help mommies while they're having the babies."
"What?" Fructus asked.
"Nothing, sweetheart."
"Ms. Danaë, how to girls get babies in their tummies?" asked Hebe.
"Well, the mommy and daddy pray to all the gods and that's how it works," said Ms. Danaë, feeling more awkward than that time she'd met Polydectes the first time.
"Ms. Danaë, my daddy told me I have to nail a hot dude if I wants to get pregnant," said Hebe, smiling at her teacher.
"When did he tell you that?"
"Last night."
Ms. Danaë nodded, but she didn't say anything. So she went to put on the circle time CD. That meant that whenever the kids heard "Come to the Carpet" by the Greeks, they had to come to the carpet.
"Oh," said Ms. Psyche, "there's the song! Let's go to the carpet for circle time!"
"But, Ms. Psyche," said Perseus, "it's outside time!"
"You're right," said Ms. Psyche. "Everyone, let's head outside for playtime!"
Later that day, the parents came to pick their kids up. Ms. Psyche gave Cassiopeia an angry look, then dismissed her with Andromeda at her heels.
When Demeter picked up Fructus that afternoon, she thought his face looked pink, but she boiled it down to him having a monster crush on Hebe and took him home.
Back at Fructus' house, Demeter was putting a scarf around his neck, for mother and son were going outside to play in the fields.
"Mommy, I'm too hot," said Fructus.
"Now, Fructus," Demeter scolded, "it's not nice to be vain, so don't call yourself hot."
"But, Mommy, I'm too warm."
Demeter felt his forehead. "You'll be cold when you get outside, dear." She picked up a big ball and ran out the door with her son.
Demeter and Fructus were playing catch when Fructus' stomach started to rumble in a not-so-great way. So he turned around and puked in the grass.
"Oh, Fructus," Demeter said warily. "Why didn't you tell me that you weren't feeling well?"
"I DID!" Fructus yelled at her, puking in the grass again.
"Let's go inside and I'll make you something that'll settle your belly," Demeter said. So she took Fructus inside and sat him down in front of the TV.
Demeter ran to the stove, made something for her son, and handed it to him in a bowl. "It's oatmeal, dear," she said happily. "Eat up! Mmm, yummy, yummy oatmeal!"
Fructus literally looked at it and puked again.
"Okay," Demeter decided. "No oatmeal for you today."
When Trippy came home from the fields, he discovered his son wrapped up in blankets with the "puke bucket" sitting next to him.
"Uh, what happened, Dem?" he asked.
"Well, I was playing with him outside and he threw up. So I made him some oatmeal, which made him do it again. I think he's got that stomach flu going around." Demeter sighed loudly. "What should we do for dinner?"
"I don't think he'll be up for eating anything," said Triptolemus. "Maybe we could go downstairs and watch a movie and have dinner down there."
While Fructus was getting sick at his house, in the house across the street, the stomach bug had just hit.
It was around two in the morning when Hebe woke up. She'd been awakened from a very deep sleep from an upset stomach. Thinking she had to poop, she went into her connecting bathroom.
There was a knock on the door and Eileithyia, the childbirth goddess, came into the bathroom. "Hebe, you okay?"
"Ellie, my tummy feels icky," Hebe told her sister.
"Do you want me to get Mommy?" Eileithyia asked.
Hebe nodded.
Eileithyia ran into Hera's room, where she found her parents sleeping. Hera was sleeping on her side away from Zeus, and Eileithyia could just assume that they'd been fighting in bed again.
"Ma," said Eileithyia, "Ma, something's up with Hebe."
"What's the matter?" Hera asked, sitting up and looking at her daughter.
"She said her stomach's hurting her," said Eileithyia. "She's asking for you."
"Where is she?"
"In the bathroom."
Sure enough, Hera found her sick daughter on the toilet, looking at a picture book. "Hi, baby," Hera cooed. "Are you feeling sick?"
"Yes," Hebe said.
"What hurts?"
Hebe coughed violently and threw up onto the floor.
Hera picked her daughter up and stood her in front of the toilet. "Ellie, go tell your father to get some paper towels to clean this mess up. And also tell him to get the thermometer and a glass of water for Hebe."
"Okay, Ma." Eileithyia headed into Zeus' room. "Dad, Hebe threw up. Ma needs your help with her."
"I'm busy," Zeus grunted in his sleep.
"All you have to do is get some paper towels, the thermometer, and a glass of water."
"But that requires me to move, and Zeusy no likey moving at whatever-the-Hades time it is," Zeus whined. "Tell your mother that I'm the king and I don't gotta do nothing she says!"
Eileithyia pulled off the quilt. "NOW!"
"I'm up. Jeez."
Zeus ran downstairs, ate a brownie, and grabbed the thermometer and the water for Hebe. He found Hera in Hebe's bathroom. Hera was in the middle of giving Hebe a bath while averting her eyes from Hebe's vomit.
"Hurry up, Hera, so we can have late-night sex," Zeus said, smirking.
"Zeus, take your daughter's temperature," snapped Hera as she pulled a pale Hebe out of the tub.
"Is this the rectal thermometer or the normal one?"
"We got rid of the rectal one because Mother Rhea said Hebe wouldn't enjoy that too much."
Zeus uncapped the thermometer and stuck it under Hebe's tongue. "She's burning up," he declared. "Well, guess she'll stay home tomorrow…but I'm not taking care of her."
Hebe burped and threw up into the toilet again.
"Yeah, you're watching her," Hera said, looking disgusted. "You know how I am with puking kids." She ran to her phone and called Demeter's house. "Hi, Dem, it's Hera. Listen, sorry about waking you up, but Hebe's sick, so I'm wondering if Fructus had the same thing."
"Yeah, he's been sick since he got home from school," said Demeter sadly. "I'll be looking after him tomorrow while Trip's at work."
"Yeah, Zeus is watching Hebe tomorrow while I'm at work…plus I can't stand puking kids. Now, if she had something else like a cold or something, I'm cool with that. But the flu…no thanks!"
The following morning, Ms. Psyche reported that Fructus and Hebe were both sick with the flu.
Jason felt pretty guilty about getting everyone else sick. Even though he felt better (with a few episodes of coughing here or there), everyone else was basically going to get it anyway.
Back at Fructus' house, Demeter was having a nice day to herself.
Demeter was sitting on the couch watching a cooking show, when Fructus came running down the stairs. "Mommy, can I go outside?" he begged.
"No," Demeter said firmly. "Now go back upstairs and sleep. You were up puking last night and you need your rest."
Fructus sadly walked up the stairs and into his room, where he put his TV on. His favorite show "Fruits and Veggies" was on, so he watched that for a bit before he finally dozed off.
At Hebe's house across the street, Hebe was still running a fever and she had a sore throat, but she wasn't throwing up anymore.
Hebe ran downstairs to see Zeus watching an Olympian basketball game.
"Daddy," Hebe said, "can I—"
"No, you cannot," Zeus said. "Go upstairs and sleep."
"Daddy, can I have some water, please?" Hebe begged her father.
"Okay," Zeus sighed. "Why can't Mommy watch you?"
"Because she's at work, Daddy."
"Right…of course she is."
Zeus handed Hebe some water and sent her back upstairs.
"Daddy?"
"WHAT?" Zeus screamed at Hebe.
"Can you rub my back, please?"
"No. Go night-night."
"You suck!"
"Well…you suck!"
"You suck more!"
"What's going on?" asked a third voice. Eileithyia had just come down the stairs.
"Ellie, tell Daddy to rub my back," Hebe said.
"Eileithyia, tell Hebe I'm not her personal slave," Zeus replied.
"Hebe, I'll rub your back for you," said Eileithyia. "And, Dad, don't be such a dick."
"Ha-ha," Zeus said. "You said—"
"I know what I said," said Eileithyia sharply. "Come on, Hebe. Do you wanna watch a movie while I rub your back?"
"Uh-huh."
While Hebe and Fructus were resting up so they could hopefully get back to preschool soon, Psyche and Hedone were heading home from school. Psyche put on a kid's CD of fun songs, which Hedone liked to sing along to.
"Mommy," said Hedone from her car seat, "can you turn it off? My head hurts."
"Do you have a headache, baby?" Psyche asked from the front seat.
"Yeah."
Psyche turned off the CD, even though she wanted to sing the words to "Mr. Happy Rainbow in the Big, Blue Sky". "How bad is it, honey?"
"Not bad. Just annoying."
"Okay. Mommy's going to drop you off at home so you can play with Daddy. I'm going to get dinner for tonight. Would you like anything special?"
Hedone shook her little head. "No thanks, Mommy."
"Okay, sweetie."
Psyche dropped Hedone off at home, where she and Eros played for a while. Hedone's headache was slowly getting better, but now she was getting a sore throat.
"Daddy, I don't feel good today," Hedone complained.
"What's wrong, cutie?" Eros asked as he started cleaning up Hedone's dolls.
"My throat hurts, Daddy." Hedone began coughing violently into her sleeve.
Eros took her temperature and decided that Hedone was fine at the moment, but he wanted to monitor it.
Psyche came home a few minutes later. "I'm home!" she sang. "I brought chicken and mashed potatoes!"
As soon as Hedone smelled the chicken, she became very nauseous.
"Hedone's not feeling very well, babe," said Eros.
"She said she had a bit of a headache on the way home," Psyche said, starting the oven.
"Mommy, I think I'm gonna—" Before Hedone could finish the sentence, she threw up all over the floor.
"Oh, honey," Psyche said, running to her daughter. "Let's go take a bath."
"I'll clean this mess up, Psyche," said Eros, going over towards the front closet. That was good, because Psyche's big weakness was puke and puking kids, so it's a wonder she didn't puke herself.
Psyche put her puking daughter into the tub and washed her hair. Then she took Hedone out and did her hair, putting it into a ponytail. Just then, the phone rang.
"Hello?" said Psyche.
"Hey, Psyche. It's Danaë. Is Hedone coming down with the flu?"
"Oh, that already happened. She just got sick, so she will not be eating dinner tonight."
"I'm worried about Perseus, too. I hope he doesn't get it from anyone, but of course, he will because everyone's always hugging each other."
"Mommy," said Hedone from the toilet, "there's water coming out of my butt."
"And now she's got diarrhea."
"Well, I hope she feels better," said Danaë darkly. "Will you be at school tomorrow?"
"Yes, I'll be there," said Psyche. "I'll see you then."
After hanging up the phone, Psyche took Hedone into her room, where she told her to get some sleep. Hedone shrugged, kissed her mother on the cheek, and cuddled up next to her stuffed animals.
Psyche ran downstairs, washed her hands until they were literally bleeding golden ichor, and ate dinner with Eros.
The following morning, Ms. Psyche walked into the preschool to find Ms. Hecate glaring at the computer.
"Morning," Ms. Psyche yawned widely.
"Good morning, Psyche," said Ms. Hecate. "You're late."
"Yeah, I know that," Psyche said miserably. "Hedone was throwing up all night and I hardly got any sleep."
"Oh," Ms. Hecate sighed with relief. "I thought you didn't like working here."
"Why would that ever be a problem?" Ms. Psyche said.
Ms. Hecate shrugged. "I don't know," she admitted.
Ms. Psyche walked into the classroom to find Ms. Danaë doing story time with the preschoolers. She immediately saw that Phaethon was back, looking tired, but happy to be there.
"Who can tell me why he gave the girl the flowers?" asked Ms. Danaë. "Phaethon?"
"Because that's a nice thing to do," said Phaethon proudly. "Hi, Ms. Psyche!"
The whole class—including Ms. Danaë—turned around to see Ms. Psyche standing at the entrance to the classroom.
"Good morning, everyone," said Ms. Psyche. "Sorry I'm late. Hedone is sick, and I didn't get sleep last night."
Ms. Danaë looked at the class. She handed Ms. Psyche the attendance sheet. "Now we only have nine," she said darkly. "No Hebe and Fructus."
"Or Makaria," said Ms. Psyche.
"Then that makes eight."
When lunchtime rolled around, Ms. Psyche and Ms. Danaë gave the kids their food. Today's lunch was sandwiches, applesauce, carrots, and chocolate cake for dessert.
"Ms. Danaë," said Andromeda, "do you wanna play with me outside after lunch?"
Ms. Psyche decided that the kids needed to work off their lunch energy, so they switched playtime from before lunchtime to after lunchtime.
Since Andromeda was the only girl who was in school, Ms. Danaë felt sort of bad for her. Plus, Andromeda's mom sucked, so Ms. Danaë was kind of like a second mother to her.
"Of course," said Ms. Danaë.
So after lunch, everyone headed outside for playtime. Perseus, Andromeda, and Ms. Danaë went for a walk in the woods behind the school, while Ms. Psyche was left with six kids. But she didn't mind. The kids—except Theseus—didn't need that much monitoring.
In the woods, Ms. Danaë and the two kids were looking for cool stuff.
"Ms. Danaë," said Andromeda, "can I live with you?"
Ms. Danaë almost started crying. "No, honey," she said gently. "Why would you want to live with us?"
"Because I love Perseus and my mommy doesn't like him that much."
"But your daddy likes him," said Ms. Danaë. "And plus—Perseus, honey, the leaves aren't food! And plus, if you lived with us, you'd be seeing mean old Uncle P a lot."
"Perseus told me that Uncle P can't play with him anymore," said Andromeda.
"He kind of just shows up at our house sometimes," said Ms. Danaë.
Perseus looked at his mother. "Is he coming to dinner tonight, Mommy?"
"Yes, honey," Ms. Danaë said reluctantly. "He said he wanted to see you again. Maybe we could all play a game together."
"We could go fishing," said Perseus excitedly.
"Yeah…" said Ms. Danaë. "Let's go back to the playground, you two."
Later that day, Cepheus came to pick up Andromeda from preschool. Ms. Danaë mentioned to him what Andromeda had said about living with the fishing family.
Usually, Cepheus picked Andromeda up because Cassiopeia honestly freaked Andromeda out. So there!
"Andromeda, don't you like Mommy?" asked Cepheus.
"No," snapped Andromeda. "Daddy, she's evil. She's like a Fury, but slightly nicer."
Cepheus couldn't believe Andromeda was comparing Cassiopeia to a freaking Fury. Damn, that woman must be awful!
Cepheus pulled into the garage and gave Andromeda some grapes for her after-school snack. He liked watching his daughter eat grapes because Andromeda always made this weird face whenever something sour hit her tongue. Her face got all scrunched up.
"Daddy, what's for dinner?" she asked, plucking another grape from the vine.
"Pasta, honey," said Cepheus, going over to the stove to make the noodles.
Cassiopeia walked into the room and walked right upstairs.
"See?" asked Andromeda. "What am I? Chopped liver?"
"Just ignore her," her father suggested. "That's what I do. Of course, I don't know why I married her."
Andromeda made a face and pushed the empty plate away. "Daddy, I don't feel very good."
"What's wrong, princess?"
"Um…" Andromeda said, clutching her tummy, "I have to poop, Daddy."
"Okay. Go ahead."
Andromeda bolted for the bathroom, where she had some awful diarrhea. But that was the end of that…or was it?
Later on, Cepheus, Cassiopeia, and Andromeda were all sitting around the table. It was a nice atmosphere.
"Eat up," Cassiopeia demanded. "That pasta wasn't cheap."
"Mommy, my belly hurts," said Andromeda, clutching her stomach. Then she threw up all over the floor.
"In the kitchen, Andromeda?" Cassiopeia barked as her daughter continued to hurl.
"Get the thermometer," Cepheus ordered, hauling his daughter upstairs and into the bathroom. "Are you okay, princess?"
Andromeda burped and dry-heaved, but nothing else came up.
Cassiopeia took Andromeda's temperature. "Yep, she's sick all right." She put the thermometer back in its case. "I have to run a few errands tomorrow, so you're watching her."
"Okay, my lovely flower."
Cepheus gave Andromeda a bath, helped her brush her teeth, and put her in some comfy jammies. Then he put her to bed, kissed her goodnight, and covered his freezing daughter up with her thick quilt.
The next morning, Andromeda slept in because she'd been throwing up all night. She'd also had a really high fever, so Cepheus and Cassiopeia were both up trying to get it to break by giving their daughter cold baths.
Cassiopeia went shopping, so Cepheus was in charge of his sick kid. He pretty much let her sleep the whole day, occasionally going into her room to check up on her.
Around noon, Andromeda began to get slightly hungry, so she walked sadly downstairs and sat with her father. "Daddy? Can I have some soup, please?"
"Of course you can, dear," said Cepheus. He got up and made her some chicken soup. Then he put her in the playroom and put on a princess movie for her.
Meanwhile, it was two-thirty when the school day ended, and Perseus wasn't feeling so great. He was holding his stomach and looking pretty pale. Danaë didn't really notice this until Perseus pushed his fish sticks away from him.
"What's wrong, dude?" asked Dictys, eating his own fish sticks. "You love fish sticks."
"I don't feel good," said Perseus. "My tummy's hurting me."
"Danaë," said Dictys, "where's the thermometer?"
"It's in the closet," she replied, drinking some milk.
Dictys took Perseus' temperature, declaring that his son was—in fact—pretty feverish. "Dude, you think you'll—"
Perseus scrunched up his face, then smiled shyly at his parents. "Uh…I think I just pooped."
Dictys and Danaë both ran upstairs, Dictys carrying Perseus while Danaë got a bath ready for him.
"Take off his clothes!" Danaë said loudly over the running water.
Dictys quickly ripped his son's clothes off and sat Perseus down on the toilet while the water ran. Danaë put him into the tub and Perseus relaxed as he noticed his toy boat and rubber ducky floating alongside him in the water.
Danaë washed her son's hair while Dictys talked to her. "So, since we both work tomorrow…who's watching him?"
"I could stay home," said Danaë, "but I'm sure Psyche needs me tomorrow."
"I could stay home," said Dictys, "but if I do, then my fishing supplies store won't be open."
"You guys could leave me here alone," Perseus suggested. "I'm a big boy now!" And he stood up, completely naked, in front of his parents.
"Sit back down, honey," said Danaë.
Perseus coughed and puked in the water.
"Well, so much for the bath," said Dictys. "Well, let's get you out of there, buddy."
"I guess we'll have to call P-O-L-Y-D-E-C-T-E-S," said Danaë, spelling out the word like it was a big secret because she knew Perseus couldn't spell yet.
"I guess we'll have to live with it," Dictys said. "I mean, he's the closest relative we've got, and I'm not leaving him with Helios or Cepheus or anyone else because I want him to be home when he's sick."
"Who're you guys talking about?" asked Perseus.
"We're getting you a babysitter for tomorrow," said Danaë. "I'll go call him right now. Dictys, please get Perseus cleaned up and put him to bed."
Dictys dried Perseus off, brushed his teeth, and carried him into his room, where his nasty fish pillow was awaiting him.
"We gotta wash Fishy," said Dictys.
"Yeah," said Perseus darkly. "We gots to wash Fishy."
Danaë walked into the room, the phone in her hands. "He said he'll be over here at eight forty-five tomorrow morning," she said reluctantly. "And he wants to go out to dinner with me at some point because he likes me."
Perseus had a bad feeling that he wouldn't like the babysitter tomorrow.
The following morning, the doorbell rang at eight forty-five. Danaë ran to get it while Dictys cleaned up Perseus after another puking/diarrhea episode.
"Hello, my little princess," said Polydectes. "Wanna go on the couch and do a little something-something?"
"No thanks," snapped Danaë. "So Perseus just threw up again."
"Oh…when you said the flu, I thought it was the coughing kind."
"And he's also got a bit of diarrhea and a low fever. So he'll be home the next two days. If it goes well today, and I don't hear anything bad from Perseus, you may come back tomorrow," Danaë snarled, getting on her jacket. "And I don't like you."
Polydectes puckered up for a kiss.
"Gross," said Danaë, heading out the door to preschool.
"Bye, baby-cakes!" Polydectes called after her. He stepped inside the house to find Dictys walking down the stairs. "Hey, Dick!"
"Don't call me that," said Dictys firmly. "So I gave him some medicine that's supposed to settle his stomach so he won't throw up on you. If he does throw up, just put him in the tub for about thirty minutes. Same thing with diarrhea."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," said Polydectes. "Blah, blah, blah. Can I marry Danaë?"
"No." Dictys left soon after that.
Polydectes made himself at home. He claimed his territory on the couch by placing his muddy boots all over it (but the couch was brown, so they wouldn't notice…right?). Then he flipped through the channels until The Hangover came on. Then he ran through an entire set of Cards Against Humanity cards. By that time, Perseus had come downstairs to see who was babysitting him.
"Are you kidding me?" he asked angrily. "I'm already sick as it is. I don't need to get sicker!"
"Dude, you wanna hear a good card?" asked Uncle P.
"Sure," said Perseus.
"This card is What's that smell?"
"I don't know," said Perseus.
"That smell is dying of dysentery," said Polydectes. "Do you wanna hear a story now?"
"Does it involve my mom?" asked Perseus.
"No," said Polydectes. And he began the story.
THESEUS' ESSAY
One day, Theseus was in school when Ms. Psyche asked him to write an essay for homework. When Theseus got home, he ran over to his mother. "Mommy, I need an idea for my essay!"
"Shut the hell up!" yelled Aethra, who was on the phone. So he wrote that down.
Then he went to his friend Jason who was talking to his girlfriend. "Dude, I need an idea for the essay!"
Jason was talking on the phone, so he said, "Yeah, baby, yeah." So he wrote it down.
Next he went to his friends Orpheus and Perseus, who were watching The Lightning Thief. "Guys, help me with the essay."
"In my world, I'm know as Chiron," said the boys, so he wrote it down.
Then he went to his father Aegeus, who was listening to a song. "Daddy, help me with my essay!"
"8675309," sang Aegeus. He was also baking buns, and when Theseus repeated the question, Aegeus burnt his hand on them. "Ouch, you burnt my buns!"
The next day, Ms. Psyche asked Theseus to share his essay. So he stood on his desk. "Shut the hell up!" he yelled.
"Theseus, would you like to go to Ms. Hecate's office?" asked Ms. Psyche.
"Yeah, baby, yeah."
In Ms. Hecate's office, Ms. Hecate looked at Theseus. "What's your name, young man?"
"In my world, I'm known as Chiron."
"What's your phone number?"
"8675309!" Theseus sang.
Ms. Hecate tried to call the number, but the line was dead. "THIS ISN'T YOUR PHONE NUMBER!" So she picked Theseus up by the ears and smacked him on the butt.
"OUCH, YOU BURNT MY BUNS!" Theseus yelled.
WITH PERSEUS AND UNCLE P
"Wasn't that a great story?" asked Uncle P.
"No," said Perseus. "It maded me sad, 'cause I wants to go back to school and play with all my friends."
"But you're, like, sick," Uncle P said.
"But I don't care. I wanna go see Andromeda because she always makes me feel better!"
"No, kiddo. You're sick. How about you tell me a story about how sexy your mom looks when she sleeps?"
"Uncle P, I think you're weird."
"That's an understatement," Polydectes replied darkly. "Now, how about you go upstairs and take a nap?"
Perseus ran upstairs to puke, then to take a nap. Polydectes headed upstairs to "check on his nephew" (when, in actuality, he was going into Danaë's bedroom because he's a creepy stalker dude).
Back in school, Theseus' belly was hurting him.
"Ms. Psyche, I don't feel good," said Theseus, walking up to his teacher.
"Do we need to see Miss Hestia?" asked Ms. Psyche.
"Uh-huh," said Theseus.
So Ms. Danaë took him to see Miss Hestia, who took his temperature and sent him home right away.
Miss Hestia was on her computer, typing up some stuff about something of very little importance. "Hi, Theseus," she said sweetly. "What's up?"
"The sky," said Theseus. "Phaethon said that this morning. "My throat hurts…and my head hurts."
"Well," said Miss Hestia, reaching for the thermometer, "I think we'll need to take your temperature. This goes under your tongue."
A few moments later, Miss Hestia picked up the phone to call Aethra. "I'll take care of him, Ms. Danaë."
"Okay," said Ms. Danaë. "Feel better, Theseus."
"Thanks," Theseus said, and for once he didn't feel like being hyper.
Aethra came in a few minutes later, clutching her purse. "Hi, baby," she told Theseus. "What's wrong?"
"I guess he's got a sore throat and a headache," said Miss Hestia. "And he's also got a fever. Keep him home until twenty-four hours after it breaks."
"Okay," said Aethra. "We'll see you in a few days."
Once Theseus got home, Aethra ordered him to get him pajamas on and go right to bed. "And no playing with Mr. M&M, honey. You're sick and you need rest."
Theseus ran upstairs, put his pajamas on, and Aethra tucked him into bed.
So…what was going on at Perseus' house? Polydectes was snooping through Danaë's and Dictys' nightstands. Perseus was still sleeping, so Uncle P thought it would be smart to be nosy.
In Danaë's nightstand, he didn't find anything cool. He found some medicine, lipstick, and a book that Danaë had bookmarked. In Dictys' nightstand, he found a fish keychain, an extra key to Perseus' room in case he and Perseus were playing jail or something, and yet another book.
"Damn," Polydectes breathed. "I still like her, though."
"Uncle P, why're you in Mommy and Daddy's room?" asked Perseus.
"Why are you in here?" Uncle P snarled.
"Mommy and Daddy said that if I wanna come in, I have to knock and wait by the door. Then they'll tell me to come in."
"Just looking for something," Uncle P said. He grabbed the thermometer. "You done sleeping?"
"Uh-huh. I had some water come out of my butt—"
"TMI!"
"—but I feel good now."
"That's great," Uncle P smiled. "'Cause it's time for your daily torture!"
"Huh?" said Perseus.
"Hello, Perseus. I'm Dr. Uncle P, and I understand you're not feeling well today."
"Yeah. I have a tummy ache and I throwed up a lot."
"Well, let's take your temperature," said Dr. Uncle P, shoving the thermometer under Perseus' tongue. "Don't bite on that or it'll blow up and you'll die."
"What?" Perseus said, opening his mouth so that the thermometer looked like it was going to fall out.
"Ah! No talking! Dr. Uncle P's orders!" cried Dr. Uncle P. "Now let's see what this says. Hmm…Mr. Perseus, it looks like you've still got a fever. Guess what?"
"You'll throw me in the closet again?"
"No, stupid kid! Dr. Uncle P's going to give you some yummy-tasting medicine!"
"You know, my daddy makes a game out of it," said Perseus.
"Well, here's my game," said Polydectes. "Come with me."
Dr. Uncle P got out the Little Heroes' Pepto-Bismol and checked the dosage. "Looks like this'll do the trick," he concluded, unscrewing the cap. Perseus stood next to his jackass uncle and looked up at him.
"Uncle P—"
"That's Dr. Uncle P, kid," snapped Dr. Uncle P.
"Dr. Uncle P, that stuff is pink so that means that only girls can take it!"
"Stop being a sexist kid," snapped Dr. Uncle P. "I love pink. It's my favorite color."
"It's Andromeda's favorite, too," said Perseus, blushing furiously. He wished he could have a hug from Andromeda, but then Mrs. C would've been angry at him for life.
Uncle P—sorry, Dr. Uncle P—poured out the correct dosage and handed the cup to Perseus. Perseus smelled it and ran off.
"Get your tiny ass back here!" screamed Uncle P. "I am the king of this house!"
Perseus ran all the way into the front room and under the piano bench. Uncle P would never find him there.
"Oh, I love hide-and-seek," said Uncle P. "Every time I found your father, I'd throw rocks at him. Ah…those were the days. Okay, you need to take this medicine. Where the Tartarus are you?!"
Perseus tried to control his breathing. If Uncle P found him, he would make Perseus take the yucky medicine, and Perseus' belly was too upset to even think about that.
Uncle P came into the front room. "I found you!" he yelled with delight, removing the piano bench and grabbing Perseus by the front of his shirt. He sat on the floor with his "patient" and handed him the cup with the drugs in it. "Okay. Open up."
"Make me, bitch," snapped Perseus.
"Do you talk to Dick that way?"
"Who's Dick?"
"Your father."
"My father's not a dick. His name is Dictys. I don't even know what a dick is!"
"There is so much you shall learn when you're older," said Uncle P.
"When's Mommy coming back?" Perseus demanded.
"Guess who I am? I'm the tickle monster!" Uncle P said, completely ignoring his nephew. Uncle P tickled Perseus, which made Perseus open his mouth. Polydectes shoved the drugs down Perseus' throat, causing him to cough and gag.
"That wasn't so bad, huh?" asked Uncle P.
Theseus, meanwhile, was in his bed trying to sleep. He suddenly sat up and vomited all over his quilt.
Aegeus walked in. "Uh…AETHRA! Theseus is hurling!"
Aethra walked in and dragged her kid into the bathroom, where she gave him a bath and got him cleaned up before she put him in a new pair of pajamas. "Are you okay, hon?"
"Y-yes," Theseus shivered, hugging his mother's leg in hopes that it would warm him up. "I'm cold, Mommy."
"I know, baby. You get to sleep all day tomorrow and get better. Then you can go back to school when you're done with this flu."
That being said, Aethra put her son back in his bed, got him a new quilt, shut off the lights, then went downstairs to make herself and Aegeus some dinner.
Phobos and Deimos were in their basement, chasing each other and playing a war game.
"I'm so happy we're not getting sick," said Deimos. "Because we already got the flu!"
"Yeah, and we were puking and Mommy stepped in it," Phobos smirked. "Can I have the blue sword?"
"No," snapped Deimos. "You get the green one!"
This resulted in the two of them wrestling on the ground. Meanwhile, Ares stood in the doorway, feeling very proud of his kids for learning the true meaning of wrestling. So he got out his phone, got a few pictures, and sent them to Aphrodite in a text that read: BOYS R FIGHTING. SO PROUD!
Bellerophon, on the other hand, didn't feel like playing with his toys in his playroom that night. He, like everyone else, had a burning sore throat and a stomachache, but it wasn't as bad as everyone else's was.
Glaucus came into his playroom and found his son on the floor in the fetal position. "What's wrong, buddy?" he asked Bellerophon.
Bellerophon stood up and threw up on Glaucus' shoes. "Sorry," he coughed. "It was an accident."
Glaucus grimaced. "'Sokay," he said bitterly. "Let's go get you cleaned up."
The next morning, Ms. Danaë woke up with a sore throat. Great, she thought miserably. "Dictys, can you get the thermometer?"
Dictys felt her forehead. "Yeah. You're burning up, sweetheart."
"Guess I'll stay home with Perseus today," said Danaë.
"Mommy, can I cuddle with you?" asked Perseus. "My throat hurts."
"Honey, you know that Mommy would love to cuddle with you," said Danaë. "But Mommy's sick, too."
"Does that mean Uncle P has to watch both of us?"
"No, honey. He's only watching you. Are you feeling better today?" Danaë said.
"Uh-huh," said Perseus. "Can I go back and play with my friends?"
"No," said Dictys. "I think both of you will be out for the rest of the week."
Danaë called herself and Perseus in sick again and rolled over and fell asleep. Downstairs, Perseus and Polydectes were watching a movie together while Dictys got ready to open the fish store.
"Daddy, what's a dick?" asked Perseus.
Polydectes smirked and Dictys whirled around. "Where'd you hear that?"
"Uncle P called you Dick," said Perseus.
Dictys gave an exasperated sigh and headed out the door.
It turned out that both Ms. Psyche and Ms. Danaë were sick. Psyche texted Danaë, saying how she called in sick and was getting over a slight fever. Danaë texted back, telling her she had a sore throat and a fever. Hedone—from what Psyche said—was still home, but was planning on going back to school tomorrow.
Ms. Hecate, later that day, sent out a note that said something along the lines of school being closed on Friday and will open again on Monday. Since everyone was basically really sick or still recovering, Ms. Hecate thought it would be best if everyone just stayed home and got this flu out of their systems.
Eros walked into Psyche's room. "Gods, I haven't seen Hedone eat that much even before she had the flu," he told Psyche. He kissed her on the cheek. "How are you feeling, baby girl?"
"I'm fine," Psyche sniffled.
"Can I get you anything?"
"I'll take some Advil and some crackers, please."
The people who were recovering nicely were Andromeda, Hebe, Fructus, Hedone, and a handful of other kids. Although Jason and Phaethon were mostly over it, they still had pretty bad coughs, so their parents decided to keep them home to rest up some more.
At Jason's house, Jason sat happily on the couch while he and his dad watched a movie together. Phaethon rode his trike around the kitchen while coughing all over everything in sight. Makaria still had some diarrhea, but she was now happily playing in the tub with her bath toys while Persephone smiled and washed her hair. Fructus was back to eating his normal diet of cereal and nothing fun. Hebe was bouncing on the couch while a frustrated Zeus tried to watch a football game. Hedone was eating well again. Andromeda started playing with her dollhouse. Perseus was starting to sleep less and eat more. Theseus was bouncing off the walls and being hyper again. Ms. Danaë and Ms. Psyche were both recovering nicely. And Bellerophon was feeling better, too.
It took about a week or so for the flu to work its way out of the preschool environment. So when everyone returned on Monday morning, Ms. Psyche asked how everyone was feeling. When the class responded, "FINE!", she knew they were in the clear.
That was the longest chapter I have ever written. I hope you guys liked this one! It took me about a week or so to write, so that's why I took so long!