Chapter 11:
Amy ran as fast as she could from the darkness. It had engulfed everything around her and now she was running for her life. As she ran she saw people in her lives and reached out for them only for them to be taken too. "Daddy help!" she screamed but had no response as tears flowed down her cheeks. "Help! Somebody! I need someone please; I don't want to be alone!" Suddenly everything went white and she could hardly see anything. She kept her eyes closed and heard footsteps approaching her. "Daddy? Anthony? Guys?" she said holding out her hand trying to reach for the person. She felt her hand come in contact with someone's shoulder. "Hello?" she asked and felt the person's upper body. It was a man with long hair that she knew so well. "Daddy" she said and opened her eyes. As soon as she did the darkness over took her and she screamed feeling the ground beneath her collapse. She hit a hard surface and opening her eyes she could only see a white light and hear her panting breath
The sound of beeping filled Amy's ears and she slowly become aware of her back aching. She could feel she had tubes in her nose and the back of her left hand stung. The beeping really started to annoy her like an alarm clock so she tried to lift her hand to turn off whatever was making the racket, the furthest she got however was lift her hand only a few centimetres off the bed. "Amy?" she heard echoing around the room and suddenly a load of noise of people going in and out of the room. The feeling of someone taking her right hand and kissing it distracted her from any noise but soon they let go and she heard someone approach. The feeling that her eyelids were extremely heavy annoyed her so she focused all her might on opening them. "Amy? Can you hear me?" an unfamiliar voice asked but she couldn't respond. "Perhaps you should try, she may respond to you" she heard more clearly than any other words said and the feeling of someone holding her hand once more became clearer to her mind. Her hair was brushed away from her forehead softly soothing her mind
"Amy, sweetie I need to know if you can hear me ... squeeze my hand as hard as you can if you can hear me" Roger's voice filled her ears and she felt pure joy so focused all her attention on doing so. She soon heard people responding to that and she felt Roger kiss the back of her hand once more. "Ok we need you to open your eyes honey if you can" it took a few moments but she managed to flutter open her eyes. Her vision was blurred but she recognised the person looking over her instantly. She brought her hand up to his cheek and felt his stubble as he smiled, tears in his eyes
"I know you ... daddy?" she said so softly it was barely audible and he kissed her hand once more
"We've been waiting for you to wake up" he explained. She felt her eyelids become heavy so she closed her eyes once more for a moment. She turned her head away and opening her eyes she came face to face with her doctor
"Hey Amy, I'm Doctor Fields. Are you in any pain at all?" he asked and she nodded
"My ... back" she explained and began to cough. The doctor brought a glass of water and straw to her lips. She felt the cold liquid flow down her throat relieving the pains down her throat
"You're throat may hurt for a while also as we had to put a tube down your throat but we'll give you some painkillers to help with that and your back. In a day or so your throat should be ok. You back may take a week or so as you got an infection which made you very ill. You've been unconscious for six days because of it" he explained and she looked up at him
"Stage one?" she asked and he nodded
"It's going to be ok alright kiddo?" she heard Tom's voice and looked to the foot of the bed. She hadn't realised that the others were there and she squeezed Roger's hand as tears fell from her eyes
"You need to rest Amy, you won't be able to sit up or move onto your side for a few more days. You've done so well and I know you need time with your family. So get some rest and I'll talk to you when you're a little stronger" the doctor explained and she turned to look at Roger. His gaze and look on his face told her everything she needed to know
"Thank you for everything" Mark said Roger nodded
"Thank you" he said and the doctor smiled
"You're welcome" as the doctor left the others gathered around Amy. She looked at the familiar faces and noticed Nicholas, Jane and Anthony were not there
"Where are the others?" she asked her voice becoming stronger
"They had work to do at university. They had a load of assignments to hand in before Thanksgiving" Maureen explained
"O no my assignments" Amy moaned closing her eyes
"Don't worry; you can't get thrown out of university for not handing in your assignments giving what happened. You've got an extension until after the Thanksgiving break" Tom explained
"Guys let's go get a drink, we need to call the others too" Joanne suggested and they understood Roger needed to be alone with Amy for a while. Roger smiled softly with thanks and watched them leave the room. After they were gone he sat up on the edge of the bed so he would be clearer in her view and she opened her eyes once more
"You were in my dreams, I was all alone but you were there. I'm sorry if I scared you" she explained and he shook his head
"Don't be, I'm the one who's sorry. You shouldn't have to go through this alone. I knew I shouldn't have gone" he responded softly stroking her hair
"It would have happened if you went or not ... I thought I was never going to see you again" she explained and he rested his forehead against hers
"I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere ok?" he asked and she nodded. He pulled back away from her and kissed her forehead. "Look I was thinking if it is too much for you maybe you should put your studying on hold"
"No, I can't do that. I feel more determined than ever now to do it. Please don't make me give it up"
"I'm not telling you to, I'm just saying it's an option if you need to put it on hold for a while you're health is the most important thing. I wouldn't dare try to make you give it up it's like you asking me to give up writing. I love you too much to ask you to do that" he defended himself
"I love you so much too. What's going to happen to me?" Amy asked as silent tears fell from her eyes. Roger softly brushed them away
"You have to stay here for about a week and then you'll be going to rehab to get your strength back as the infection has weakened your strength. You'll stay there for however long you need"
"So I have to be in hospital over Thanksgiving?" Roger slowly nodded. "I'm not ready to go, I don't want to leave you" she blurted out unable to control herself as more tears came to her eyes
"Hey now don't talk like that. We'll get through it the same as e do with everything else. Look there is something I have to tell you" Amy looked confused and Roger held her hands. "The press have found out about you and Anthony. They also have been saying the reason you collapsed and your weight loss was due to an eating disorder"
"Why do they do that? Make up lies to sell papers?"
"It's their business, it is their purpose. I wanted you to know in case anyone tries to ask you about it and I've been getting phone calls left right and centre from my publicist about interviews with you from various TV shows and magazines"
"Is Anthony ok?" she asked concerned
"To be honest I haven't seen him at all. Security has been tight because of the press and all. Jane told him the truth about your health but I don't know where he is. I'm sorry honey I wish I could say otherwise" he tried to explain as best as he could and saw the sorrow in her eyes and silence fell over them for a moment
"I don't know what to do" she said softly and began to sob. Roger held her as best he could without hurting her and tried to be as much of a support as possible. Eventually she cried herself to sleep in Roger's arms
"Ok Amy all done" a nurse said laying her back onto the bed. The dressings on Amy's back had been changed and she couldn't help sighing with relief when it was over. Her back was comfortable enough for her now to have the bed in a more upright position so she could sit and talk to her friends and family. As the nurse brought the bed sheets back over her weak body Amy closed her eyes trying not to focus on the pain. A silent tear fell from her left eye which the nurse noticed. "Are you ok honey?" she asked and Amy opened her eyes
"Yeah I just realised I have something I need to do. Can you pass me the phone please?" the nurse rolled the portable hospital phone to Amy's side and handed it over
"I'll go find your father and tell him you're all done" the nurse explained and Amy nodded. She stared at the phone for a moment debating if she should dial the number she had repeating in her
mind but she knew if she didn't do it then she never would. She felt her hands shaking as she began to dial
"Hello?" Anthony's voice came softly to her ears
"Hey" silence fell over the two of them. All Amy wanted was for him to sound excited to hear her voice and make her smile but the silence broke her heart in two
"Are you ok?" he asked with no emotion in his voice
"I'm alive if that is what you mean"
"Look I tried to get there but I couldn't get to you" he explained
"What about after the press found out about us? Did you try then" the only response she got was silence. "Well that silence says it all"
"It is not like I just sat back the whole time you know" he replied annoyed
"You know getting angry with me right now isn't the best thing to do if you want us to salvage some kind of a relationship"
"Who says there is anything to salvage?" he asked in an angry tone making her feel like her heart already split in two had been put into a blender
"What do you want from me?" she asked bluntly
"I don't even know anymore" she wiped away tears and plucked up the courage to ask the question she had been dreading to
"Has there been someone else?" silence fell over the line once more for a moment
"Don't ask me that"
"Why? Because you can't be a man and admit it? You make me sick do you know that?"
"It isn't like you gave me anything like a relationship back to sustain it!" he responded and she felt her blood begin to boil with rage
"No! I gave you everything! You are just pissed because I wouldn't sleep with you. You don't get how powerful the disease is that I have and I didn't want to contemplate passing it onto you. Can't you see I was trying to protect you?"
"That and you wanted to protect yourself. That is what you do isn't it? You hide behind your disease to prevent you from being human! That and you don't want your perfect American sweetheart image to be tarnished so you do whatever you can to make the public love you. No wonder you love the stage so much because you feel so lost when you don't act to the public. You don't understand what living is"
"At least I understand what love is" she said sternly and hung up the phone. All she could do was stare blankly at the wall in front of her, her hand still resting on the phone unit
"Look who we found out in the hall, they were practically tearing down the door!" Roger's voice came to her ears and she turned her head to the door to see the gang enter with Jane, Rose and Nicholas. The tears instantly began to fall from her eyes as her friends hugged her
"We were going to bring you flowers but they aren't much of a treat; so double chocolate muffins it is!" Rose gushed holding up a paper bag making Amy smile
"Thanks guys ... I'm really sorry I scared you"
"We are just glad you're ok. We know what the doctors' said and we want you to know you are stuck with us ok?" Jane responded squeezing Amy's right hand and Amy felt relief as she didn't have to tell them
"How is the play going? Are you able to cope without me?" she asked and Nicholas smiled
"Somewhat, if you hadn't written such detailed stage direction on all our scripts then we would be totally lost" Nicholas explained
"Everyone really misses you" Jane added and Amy folded her arms
"Not everyone" she muttered
"What's wrong sweetie?" Maureen asked seeing the sorrow in Amy's eyes. Amy was silent for a moment and had to look away to be able to say it and a fresh batch of tears came to her eyes
"I'm so stupid to think that ... Anthony cheated on me ... so it's over"
"WHAT?!" everyone said in unison and Amy closed her eyes. She heard everyone ask her questions, Roger threatening to kill Anthony and Mark trying to calm him down. After a few moments Amy opened her eyes and looked at Nicholas who blankly stared back at her. Somehow a matter of understanding came across them which they did not communicate in words. Nicholas merely nodded and she knew he already knew
"It doesn't matter ok? It's his loss and I can't focus on it or I'll go insane" Amy explained looking around the room. "I just wonder what I can do about the press; they are going to have a field day when I go rehab"
"I can't believe they think you have an eating disorder" Rose said biting into one of the muffins
"Well the only thing you can do is set them straight about it" Jane answered
"What like an interview?" Joanne asked
"Think about it, if the general public are buying papers and magazines in their millions to find out what is going on according to the papers how many million are going to tune into a TV interview starring you? I think that will set them straight but it will mean you'll have to tell the whole truth about your health" Jane explained
"I don't know if I'm ready for that"
"Well you have the whole time you're in rehab if you want to do it. I think it's a good idea" Nicholas added
"You are such a liar!" Mark laughed at Roger
"I am not! I swear I was ... indicating to the man where to go when he wound me up in the Cafe and the glass I was holding just ... slipped out of my hand!" he defended himself making everyone in the room laugh
"And on that note we had better be going. It's 2am and I have to be up in four hours for a business meeting" Joanne said standing up and the others agreed
"Do you have to?" Amy asked
"Yeah because people need to sleep to survive sweetie" Jane responded before giving her a hug
"I'll stay here with you" Roger said with a yawn
"No, go I'll be fine. You need rest and you won't get it sat on a chair" Amy protested
"You sure?"
"Yes, I'll be resting anyway and if you're here I'll be too worried about you to be able to sleep! Go" Roger kissed her forehead
"I'll see you first thing tomorrow" he said softly and rubbed his nose against hers making her smile. He hadn't done that for a long time and it made her feel better whenever he did it. He gave her a small hug and kissed her forehead once more before leaving the room. Everyone gave her a hug and filed out of the room until only Nicholas was left stood in the corner of the room by the door
"How long have you known?" Amy asked folding her arms
"Since the day you fell ill. To be fair I haven't had a chance alone to tell you so please don't be angry with me" he asked walking towards her slowly
"I'm not angry with you Nicholas ... I'm angry with me! I was so stupid to think I could be happy with him, Jane and Rose tried to warn me but I wouldn't listen. They were right I am a stupid girl for believing for once that I'd find someone who didn't care about my illness to be with me! The only reason he cheated was because I wouldn't sleep with him but it was because I didn't want to hurt him by passing on this terrible disease. I guess I'm destined never to be happy" Nicholas sat on the edge of her bed shaking his head
"Don't say that. You deserve so much more then that reptile. You'll find someone and when you do he'll be the luckiest guy in the world and I'm not just saying that" Amy smiled softly hearing such a compliment
"I wish I could have what you and Rose have but I guess it wasn't meant to be for me and Anthony. Thanks for being such a good friend" she responded softly taking his hands in hers
"No problem, now get some sleep or else your dad won't be happy tomorrow"
"Only if you promise not to get angry with Anthony or the others for that matter, he isn't worth it"
"Done" he gave her a soft hug as she smiled
"Go before Jane and Rose wonder where you've gone" Amy said pushing him away softly
"Ok Miss Bossy!" he responded making her laugh as he headed for the door. As soon as he was gone her smile and laughter disappeared being replaced by tears