*sheepishly dusts off fic* I'm sorry for the month wait. If it makes it any better, this is almost twice the length of some of my earlier chapters.
On the Sunday Tony was allowed to leave the hospital room completely. By most people's standards he would have been allowed to return to a relatively normal life, but normal for Tony involved getting very little sleep and copious amounts of alcohol, which the Avengers were very determined to avoid for at least another fortnight. It was decided he needed a couple of weeks of rest by normal standards. Still, he managed to persuade the others to let him go out to dinner to celebrate on the promise that he would limit his drinking and be back home by 10. Tony surprised them all by not bothering to argue about it, confessing to Loki as they talked in the lab that morning that he would rather get out than stay locked in the house any longer.
Loki was as surprised as the rest of the Avengers however when Tony later asked if he could take him out to dinner alone. Loki had expected Tony to go with the rest of the heroes, or even maybe invite him as part of a group; he had not expected to be invited out singularly. Tony had asked Loki when everyone was in the kitchen together (having just come in from an Avengers meeting about the length of Tony's absence), and Loki did a slight double take along with everyone else.
"Me? Are you sure?" Loki asked sceptically, raising one eyebrow and trying to look cool about it, secretly wondering about Tony's motives in asking him. There was something entirely different about spending a few hours talking with someone mindlessly in a lab or by a bed and being seen out publically with them.
"Well y'know, I thought it would be a decent way to say thanks for keeping me company this past week. You're the only visitor I've had who hasn't used my stint stuck in bed to try and lecture me on something they couldn't pin me down to talk about beforehand. Plus you know; the food." He looked round, "Though I do appreciate that no one else bothered to stop him, you must have realised where the Doritos were disappearing to." He was met with collective nods.
There was a pause, and Loki could feel every eye in the room on him as they waited for his answer. He made his decision, straightened up and looked at Tony. "Well, it might be nice to get out of this god forsaken tower."
Tony smiled at him. "Excellent."
Three hours later Loki shuffled slightly behind Tony as the two of them walked into the restaurant, Tony prattling on about his favourite places to eat. Loki tried to keep his apprehension about the evening to a minimum but it was hard to balance the worries streaming through the back of his mind. It wasn't long before Tony noticed the lack of enthusiasm in Loki's responses, having spent so much time with him during the week he was beginning to catch up on Loki's more subtle reactions.
"What's wrong Rudolph, never been on a dinner date before?" Tony asked cheerfully, thinking with characteristic bluntness as they were led to a secluded seat at the back.
"Of course I have!" Loki snapped into Tony's ear before he could think. There was no way of brushing off the irritation he felt now; his tone of voice had said it plainly.
Tony looked at him over his unnecessary sunglasses as they sat down. "Well what's the issue then?"
"I just-," Loki paused, finding it difficult to hide his worry when Tony was looking at him with such interest and furthermore wondering why he was worried in the first place, "There are bound to be journalists around a restaurant as classy as you keep stating this one is. Will someone not recognise me? I don't particularly fancy being on the front of your newspapers only a few weeks after attempting to dominate the planet."
"Nah it'll be fine", Tony said lightly. "People come here for privacy; it's a discreet enough place about celebrity customers. It's the sort of place big city bankers come with their mistresses."
"Well heaven forbid people think I'm your mistress." Loki said lightly but behind the mask he was processing Tony's words whilst trying to squash a hint of panic. Dinner date. Loki had concluded that the intentions of the evening were perfectly innocent, but now his stupid human brain was reading a potential double meaning into everything Tony said.
Tony changed the subject pretty quickly again, as he often did, talking to Loki constantly about the other faces he recognised on the tables around them and bringing up all the scandalous stories he could think of. Loki was mildly entertained and relaxed somewhat as they ordered and ate, though he was unable to relax entirely. After dithering on the subject internally for a while, he decided to try and approach it directly.
"Well I must say it's very nice of you to invite me out tonight." He stated matter-of-fact, focusing on his plate and not looking at Tony directly. "You've been very generous to me of late."
Tony looked up at the abrupt change of subject. "Well you've been very nice to me recently. After we talked last week I thought it would take longer than this for you to thaw out. You know you're actually pretty fun to talk to when you're not being a power-crazy megalomaniac."
"I take that as a compliment." Loki smirked and Tony smiled. "Maybe it's precisely because you stopped expecting me to be nice. I do hate conforming to people's expectations."
"You just like being difficult."
"Unless people are expecting me to be difficult."
"Touché."
There was a pause as they both continued eating. After a minute Loki spoke: "I have also enjoyed the time we have spent together recently. I did not expect you to crave my attention so much." The sentence was light but the implied attraction was there in the joke. Tony prided himself on not being an idiot; he could tell Loki was after his motivation for asking him out.
"Well you know, you're the only one in the tower who didn't try and use my injury as an excuse to try and talk me into something, or try and lecture me. Sometimes it is refreshing to spend time with people who don't care. And anyway, this conversation works both ways. How come you've defrosted more for me than anyone else? I mean you've spent some time training with Nat and talking to her, but everyone else you just talk to in passing."
"Do you blame me?" Loki asked. "They all hate and disapprove of me. The dear captain treats me as if I'll commit genocide at any moment, Banner always avoids me completely (not that I blame him). Barton undoubtedly harbours some resentment towards me as I enslaved his mind but he's never around so I'm not entirely sure and my brother is the opposite, he smothers me with so much love and trust it's sickening. Natasha does seem more willing to talk with me but she still treats me somewhat as if I'm made of glass." He paused to take a sip of the wine in front of him, "It appears, Tony Stark, that I find it quite refreshing speaking to someone who isn't trying to coddle me into reforming."
"I've never liked treating people like children. Pepper always tries to get me to attend all sorts of alcoholism projects but I hate being condescended to by a bunch of self-righteous strangers telling me how to live my li-" He stopped, looking across as Loki, who was smiling at him. Realisation dawned across his face rather suddenly. "Shit. Having to live with us must suck."
Loki paused to eat a little more, then spoke lightly. "It is not the most pleasant of situations to have to live among you no. And I do not have such a definitive end goal to reach – there is no "stopping drinking". Because what exactly does "proving yourself reformed" entail for me? I do not know, and consequentially I do not know how I am expected to act. It's as if I'm expected to transform into a different and an intrinsically more good being."
"It can't be easy having to readjust your mindset completely. I wouldn't be able to do it." Tony admitted. "And after being turned human as well." There was another pause.
"Actually the humanity has made it somewhat easier" Loki admitted, wondering at this point if he was revealing too much. "The emotions I feel here are a lot stronger and affect my actions much more intensely. In Asgard I was cold and logical. Here I am bound my emotions. To a certain extent spending time with anyone who shows me kindness has made me warm to them, there is only so much resentment a Midgardian body can hold."
"So you love me because I'm nice to you?" Tony asked with a smirk. Loki snorted in resentment and finished the last mouthful of his dinner.
"Something like that." he answered eventually.
"I'll just have to keep feeding you compliments until I have you begging at my heels." Tony joked. Loki laughed at him.
"I highly doubt it. Don't let your ego get too large now, everyone knows it's inflated enough already."
"Hey I'm famous, I literally have women begging for a chance to sleep with me." Tony said seriously, downing the last of his last allowed glass of wine. "You should view yourself as privileged."
Both Tony and Loki paused at the phrasing of that last sentence. Tony realised pretty quickly what he had implied and looked into Loki's incredulous eyes. "N-not that you're in the line of people who want to sleep at me of course." Loki continued to stay silent, one eyebrow raising and finding amusement in Tony being flustered and trying hastily to rephrase. "Unless of course you do want to sleep with me, which is totally fine."
Loki's face changed again, this time looking shocked, confused and a little outraged.
"Okay erm, maybe you don't. Which is also fine. Whatever. I'm going to get the bill now. Waiter!" Tony called.
Loki sat with as blank and relaxed an expression as possible, though inside he was reeling. Well now, didn't that reveal some more of Tony's motives? He had all but blurted out that he felt some sexual desire towards Loki, or at least found him more attractive than the women he regularly went out with. Part of Loki felt very smug knowing that he was able to captive all areas of Tony's interest beyond just talking, and another part of him was panicking about his own human reactions again. Because the old Loki would have been disgusted at the idea of sexual interaction with a human but he just wasn't. In fact the idea of getting laid was actually rather appealing, and Tony wasn't unattractive. Loki knew that up in Asgard he had a shady reputation for his sexual exploits (the nickname "Whore of the nine realms" didn't come from nowhere) but he had tried to conquer and enslave this planet only a few weeks beforehand. Surely it was not right to now enjoy the idea of sleeping with its inhabitants?
Tony was trying equally hard to keep his poker-face on across the table as he paid. Usually he felt no qualms about declaring where he'd like his dick to go next but he had a feeling that Loki really wouldn't appreciate the gesture if he did declare his interest. Despite the chat they'd just had he did genuinely like the guy after the past week they'd spent together and wanted to spend more time with him and help him to stop being a dick. There was no denying that Loki was attractive but Tony thought the guy was convinced he was better than most humans, he was certain that Loki would take any attempts at sexual interaction as taking advantage of his now human state. It struck Tony quite suddenly that he really didn't want to lose his new friend, so he stayed clear of trails of thought which he thought would drive Loki away as he led them out of the restaurant to go home.
"Bye guys!" Ellie shouted at a couple leaving the cafe that had been in for their anniversary. After cleaning up the confetti she'd thrown for them Ellie slid up to Loki and he knew there were questions on the way from how she held herself and her hands shaking slightly indicating she was nervous about asking. One of the things that Loki liked about work was that he wasn't surrounded by people who had the level of charm and ability to hold a poker face that those in the tower had developed, whether through life in the public eye or through training. People here were much easier to manipulate and lie to.
"They're cute." She said, and then looked up at him. "If you don't mind me asking, are you seeing anyone?" The question was light but Loki wasn't stupid. He heard the hope behind Ellie's voice and almost cried internally at his ability to attract humans. He had noticed early on the signs of Ellie's attraction but had hoped early on she'd be too shy to act on it. He'd underestimated her.
"Not exactly." He said, going down the route he thought would drive her off most. He deliberately looked away from her, avoiding her eye contact to give the air of suddenly feeling shy.
"Oh?" She asked.
"There's someone I'd like to be seeing." He said, wondering which phrases would put her off most. He tried one of the first that came to his head. "But he doesn't know I care." He mumbled dejectedly, turning away from Ellie again to wipe the sides. Please, let her get bored or embarrassed and move on. Loki had heard about the recent opening of opinions on Midgard, but on most of his early visits to the planet homosexuality was punishable by death. He hoped attitudes hadn't changed too much and it was still enough to put her off being so determined to spend time with him.
"He?" Ellie asked. "You're gay then?" He saw the flicker of disappointment cross her face and felt a little triumphant.
"Yes, I am." Carrying on the act he looked up at her, showing worry on his face. "It's not a problem is it?"
"Oh no, not at all." She assured him. Loki smiled at first, but then felt disappointed as she didn't take the hint and carried on. "So, what's he like then, this guy that you like?"
"He's, uh, really intelligent." Loki said, not having expected this line of enquiry. Still, you didn't get anywhere as the god of lies without the ability to improvise.
"Oh come on, more than that!" Ellie smiled encouragingly at him (at least that's what she was aiming for, but it was a little over enthusiastic). "You've only lived here a few weeks, where did you meet him?"
Loki knew he was going to be pushed for details and so decided to stick to lies that were relatively close to the truth, hoping that they would be easier to remember. His mental capacity, through still fierce, wasn't as powerful as it was when he was a god and Loki found himself a little hazy on details sometimes. He also knew from experience the more specific details he put into lies the bore believable they seemed.
"He works at Stark industries." Loki lied easily, "That was somewhere I applied to work when I moved here, though they obviously did not employ me. He lives near my apartment and was the one that recommended the job to me."
"You see him on a regular basis then?" Ellie asked.
"Daily. We have spent quite some time together in my time off." Loki said lightly.
"What do you do together?" she asked again, excitedly. Loki smirked at her.
"Your questions never stop do they? We generally just talk together, though we've spent some time watching movies and I talk to him while he works." His voice was smooth as he moved around the café, starting to wipe tables so he didn't have to keep up the lovesick facial expressions he knew Ellie was expecting.
"Sorry, I'm curious." Ellie said. "One last question and then I'll shut up, will you tell him how you feel?" She asked. It was clear on her face she thought the question was a little on the personal side (and quite rightly too, it was) and Loki knew he had no obligation to answer. He did anyway.
"I hadn't intended to, I don't know." Loki paused, a look of deep thought on his face.
"Well you're not going to get together if he doesn't know you like him. Is it because you don't think he's gay?"
"That was another question."
"Sorry."
Loki swept his hair back out of his eyes. "I don't think that's an issue, I'm sure from our conversations that he's had previous partners of both sexes." Loki said without thinking, then wondering at which point in the conversation he had stopped discussing a fictional potential partner.
"Well what's the issue then?" Ellie asked. "If you feel like that about him, go for it. Either he'll say yes and you get him, he says no but is totally fine staying as friends and won't abuse it or he'll be disheartened or take advantage, in which case he's not worth having around anyway. That's my opinion." She said confidently, and then motioned sealing her lips to indicate she'd drop the subject now.
"I'll take it in mind." He said, turning back to the table. He certainly knew that Stark had an interest in him, he'd let that much slip at dinner. It was his own feelings Loki was still unsure of. After a while clearing tables with the same confused thoughts going round his head as had been the past few days he came to a conclusion: What did it matter what happened between himself and anyone on Earth? It was only a matter of time before he regained his god-status, as which point everything that happened here would become meaningless. It was nice to spend time with someone who appreciated his intellect and he'd already decided the prospect of sexual satisfaction was alluring, so when it came to Stark the solution was quite simple. Why not?