Allysen: Snape spends most of this chapter in the closet. I love how we can use our silliness for a greater good.

Kittenn1011: Yes, don't we work so well together? We had to drag Lupin kicking and screaming into the Transfiguration ("Advanced Biology") classroom. He just refused to go willingly where we needed him to go for plot purposes. Sorry, Lupin. And thanks to our reviewers from the last chapter. See you next week!

Of Mary Sues and Mind Slavery

A dark force is working within Hogwarts in the form of a deluded teenage vampire. Now it's up to the most mismatched group in Hogwarts history to save it. This is the real story of My Immortal.

My Immortal Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Eleven: You'll Never Take Me Alive!

Lupin's POV

Remus had once felt less dread entering a battlefield than he did entering Hogwarts again. Under Ebony's rule, it had become enemy territory. Hogwarts was no longer his home. Only a shadow of its former glory, the castle seemed to be dying.

"Where are the students?" wondered Snape as they passed the empty Great Hall.

Remus shrugged. "Probably still in class," he said.

"I truly doubt the students are in class right now," replied Snape.

A pause.

"Did you hear that?"

Snape raised his eyebrow. "Hear what?"

A low, ominous moaning echoed through the corridors, just barely heard by the pair. The sound seemed to come from a few dozen different voices repeating the same word in the same monotonous tone. They could not tell what the word was, but the sound frightened them nonetheless.

Snape balked. "How about you check that out, while I go on," he paused, "in the other direction."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Scared?"

"You wish," replied Snape.

"Then, as good an idea as that may sound to you, I don't think we'll survive splitting up."

"We have magic," said Snape. "They don't seem to remember that fact."

"But Ebony has mind control," Remus pointed out. "Will you remember you have magic if you don't have me here to remind you?"

Snape opened his mouth to respond, but no words came out. He turned around towards the approaching moaning as a horde of students rushed around the corner and into the hallway in which they stood.

"Professor," moaned the students, "Professor, its tim for Advanced Biology. Teach us— teach us—"

"What?" asked Remus.

Snape glanced to him and then turned on his heels and raced into the nearest closet.

"Professor," the students continued to moan.

Remus stood frozen with fright for a long moment before racing towards the same closet in which Snape had hidden. He banged against it. "Let me in, Snape."

"I am not opening the door," yelled Snape.

"Don't leave me with them!"

"Use magic," Snape mocked.

"Damn you," grumbled Remus. He reached for his wand, but the students grabbed hold of him and began dragging him away before he could cast a spell. At the sudden jerking of his body, he lost his grip on his wand and it clattered on the ground, barely heard over the moans of the students.

"Shit," yelled Remus. "Let me go— let go— Snape! Help!"

"No," yelled Snape.

"Professor," moaned the students as they lifted him into the air and began marching down the corridors.

"I'm not a professor— anymore," yelled Remus.

When they reached the transfiguration classroom, the students let go and Remus dropped awkwardly onto the floor. Remus whimpered helplessly before slowly rolling over and banging his forehead once against the ground. He pulled himself up using a nearby desk for support and then brushed himself off, as if contact with the students might infect him with insanity. He glanced around the classroom fearfully— the students were watching him expectantly from their seats. Experimentally, he slid his foot towards the door. In unison, almost all the students rose. Only a few bodies at the front of the room remained seated— presumably, Ebony and her inner circle.

Remus scooted to the front of the classroom— the students returned to their seats— and glanced at the chalkboard for a lesson idea. Maybe if he could distract them, he could slip out. Before the late bell rang, one final person slipped into the back of the room whom Remus did not recognize. He clapped his hands together and stared at the students, trying to gather his thoughts. "Class… take out your homework—"

"Wat is dis humwork u spek of?" asked Ebony.

Remus could not help but let out an audible groan. She was there.

"All right," said Remus, "what have you been doing thus far in… Advanced Biology?" The last two words of the sentence were spoken with disdain.

"Were changin' our stuff we brot into udder stuff."

"Okay," said Remus. "Do that, then." Under his breath, he added, "Why did they even need me here, then?"

Ebony pulled out a wooden pentagram covered in red fluid.

"Why is there blood on that?" he said with concern.

"From lunch," Ebony replied cheerfully.

Remus scoffed. "What did you do for lunch, slaughter an innocent doe and eat it to absorbs its strength?"

"No, I drank sum of ma blod frum sliting ma rists," she replied. "Usally I eat a Hufflepuffs, tho." She grinned, showing off her teeth, which were straight and white.

Oh My God! Oh My God! Oh My God! Remus tried not to consider the horror of consuming one's self, nor create a mental image of the damage trying to eat a person with teeth like hers might cause. When he failed, he could not supress a shudder. A bead of sweat dripped for from his forehead and trickled down his face. His wand was abandoned on the floor somewhere, his backup— a war-veteran, double-agent who had betrayed Lord Voldemort— was cowering in a broom cupboard, and the full moon was not for another two weeks. He was helpless.

"Alright, you… change that pentagram into… well, whatever you'd like."

Ebony pulled out her wand— Oh, good, thought Remus, she remembers she has one of those— and began flailing it around wildly. Remus took a hesitant step back and then dived behind McGonagall's desk. After a moment of complete silence, he peeked over it to see a black guitar on Ebony's desk transforming into Draco Malfoy.

The first thought that crossed Remus' mind was this: Oh, Merlin, she has a wand and knows how to use it. The second thought that crossed his mind was this: Oh, Merlin, she transfigured Draco Malfoy into a bloody pentagram, then into a guitar, and then back again. The third thought that crossed his mind was this: Wait, didn't 'Volfemort' have him in bondage?

"Enoby I love you!" he shouted. "I dnot care what those fucker preps and posers fink. Ur da most beautiful girl in the world. Before I met you I used to want to commit suicide all the time. Now I just wanna fucking be with you. I fucking love you!."

Remus gagged.

Malfoy started to screech something that seemed to be trying to resemble music. Remus took his time climbing out from behind the desk, but when he was certain Ebony would not be using her wand again, he did.

When Draco stopped the ear-bleeding signing, she yelled, "OMFG." As she stood up, she flipped the bird to the students wearing Gryffindor colours. She turned to Draco and said, "I love you!" before throwing herself at him and sticking her tongue down his throat, Draco barely responding. When she pried herself off his nonresponsive body, she grabbed onto his hand and started dragging him out of the room.

"Oh no," said Remus in a false forced voice. "Don't go."

The students in green and in yellow began to clap very slowly and mechanically. Remus looked at them quizzically. In the corner of his eye, he noticed who the student who had slipped in late banging her head against her desk repeatedly.

Is one of them malfunctioning? wondered Remus. Why should I even care? He threw his arms upward in exasperation and moved to the exit the room.

Before he could escape, the tardy student grabbed onto his arm and demanded, "Who are you? And what are you doing here?"

Remus gaped at her properly pronounced sentences. Despite her American accent, she spoke like a human being. "My name is Remus Lupin. I'm a friend of Dumbledore… well, I was a friend of Dumbledore. I came to give him a message and Andromeda— Professor Tonks, to you— her daughter's camera. I don't know exactly what happened to Andromeda— she seems to have ceased to exist— and don't get me started on that thing that calls itself Dumblydore."

She gaped at him. "You—"

"You too?"

She grinned. "I'm Brittany. I transferred from Salem's this year. Is Hogwarts always this… crazy?"

"No," said Remus. "We've never seen this particular brand of crazy before."

Though, thought Remus, this particular brand seems to be the most painful.