Twelve Fail-Safe Ways to Charm Witches
A/N; Hello, dear readers. We meet again. I'm sorry for the long lapse in update. Also, I apologize to those of you who I have been corresponding with through private messages; I will reply to your messages within the next few days.
Some of you were curious as to why Lily reacted the way she did when Snape was showing her off in front of James. I included that scene because all of the female characters in the HP series seem to be written with feminist ideals, and I didn't think Lily would appreciate being in the middle of James's and Severus's feud, especially since she isn't a character that condones hatred or violence. In canon, Lily was always a sore spot between James and Severus; James was jealous of Severus's and Lily's friendship while they were friends and Severus was always worried she would end up developing feelings for James one day. In this story, Lily has just come to realize where she stands between them and the motivation behind a lot of their actions. I thought Lily would react badly to Severus flaunting her in front of James because she wants the romance and affection to come from a place of sincerity, not because he has 'won' her like a trophy.
We, as readers, know Severus is completely sincere and if I were him, I would flaunt her too; but I have always viewed Lily as being rather hot-tempered and a little brash with her words, so to me it seemed appropriate for her to overreact a little. I do not mean to suggest that I view a differing opinion as being invalid. I totally understand the reasoning behind your viewpoint of that scene being OOC and I enjoy reading your input. I just wanted to take time to explain the thought process behind that scene. Anyway, happy reading!
"Off snogging slimy Slytherin boys behind the Herbology greenhouses again, are we?" Mary speculated shrewdly as Lily waltzed into their dorm room looking flustered.
"No," Lily shot back adamantly, giving her friend a burning look. "I was in the library studying."
Mary slid to the edge of her bed as Lily dumped her bag and schoolbooks on her nightstand. She flopped down on her bed and gave a great, heavy sigh.
"Long day?" Mary inquired.
"I suppose," Lily replied quietly. "It's been an odd week. It's like everything is changing all at once and my head is spinning like one of those spinning tops I played with as a child. You know what I'm talking about, right?"
"Yeah," Mary nodded, watching her friend in interest. "Why don't you fill me in? I missed you at lunch today."
"Severus fancies me," Lily whispered, more to herself than to her friend.
She still couldn't wrap her mind around it. In some ways, she still clung to her old vision of him as being the small, scraggly boy who wore the odd, smock-like shirt and too short jeans – the one who mysteriously popped out from behind a bush one day and called her a witch. It was weird and uncomfortable and a little embarrassing to suddenly view him as a potential boyfriend, but for some reason she liked it. She liked him and all of his eccentricities.
"You were right, Mary," Lily ambled on. "After all this time, you were actually right."
"You sound surprised," Mary sniffed, pretending to be miffed. "You should trust my underlying wisdom by now. When will you learn?"
Lily laughed and rolled over on her stomach and propped herself on one elbow.
"Why didn't you tell me? You knew about the letter and what it said. Why did you keep it a secret? That's not like you."
Mary crossed her arms and looked at Lily sidelong. "Oh, so just because I like some juicy gossip here and there, suddenly I'm incapable of keeping a secret?"
Lily gave her a knowing look.
"Oh, all right," Mary sighed and let her arms drop to her sides. "I really am terrible, aren't I? You know me better than anyone. Anyway, to answer your question: I didn't tell you because I feared for my life."
Lily raised a quizzical brow. "You feared for your life?" she repeated dryly.
"Yes," Mary nodded seriously and went on in a hushed, dramatic voice. "If Snape ever figured out I spilled the beans about his love letter, he would have murdered me in my sleep."
"Hey!" Lily exclaimed in alarm. "First of all, it wasn't a love letter and second, well… he probably wouldn't murder you; that's a bit dramatic, don't you think? However, he can be rather spiteful so he probably would slip one of his concoctions in your morning pumpkin juice or something."
Mary stared at Lily for a moment with a look of mild horror on her face. "Remind me again why you're friends with him? Never mind. Forget I asked. That's a dangerous road for us to go down," Mary said and gave her head a small shake as if she were a frustrated parent.
"By the way, it was definitely a love letter. It was… something else, let me tell you. Anyway, all joking aside, my main reason for letting Snape be the one to tell you he loves you is that I've been on your case a lot lately about you two being friends, and I've come to the conclusion that the best thing I can do is keep my nose out of your business."
"He never said he loved me," Lily argued, blushing. "We're just… trying things out and seeing where it goes."
"You protest too much," Mary mused, squinting from behind her spectacles.
Lily threw her pillow across the room. Mary ducked and let it land softly on the floor behind her.
Lily rolled over and scooted to the edge of her bed.
"I really appreciate that, though," Lily said sincerely, regarding her friend with thoughtful eyes. "Keeping your nose out of my business, I mean. Even if you never get to a point where you truly like Severus, I'm happy I can confide in you about my relationship with him and that you trust me enough to make my own decisions."
Mary kicked back on her bed and adjusted her glasses, reclining against her pillows with a book in hand.
"Don't mention it," she said, looking rather smug in Lily's opinion.
She opened the book with every pretense of reading.
"So," she began matter-of-factly. "Have you two kissed yet?"
Lily buried her reddening face in her hands and groaned.
The remainder of the week sped by relatively fast and before either Severus or Lily knew it, it was Saturday – or more importantly, it was the day of the Slug Club Christmas party. As the long awaited evening drew nearer, Severus decided to try something he didn't do often and that was taking a long, hot shower; although he soon discovered that shampoo and a bar of soap did very little to improve his ugliness. He combed his long hair, brushed his crooked teeth, tried to figure out a way to position his hair so it covered most of his acne (and gave up after five minutes), and changed into his best dress robes (a black one his mum had purchased from a second-hand shop in Diagon Alley for his first official dance in fifth year, in which he spent most of his time blindly laughing along with Mulciber's and Avery's weak attempts at humor as he snuck furtive glances at Lily as she danced with other boys.)
He examined his reflection in the full-length mirror in his dorm room once he had finished getting ready. He sighed in resignation and muttered: "I suppose this is the best it will get," before leaving to meet Lily.
Professor Slughorn's expensive taste for luxury had transformed the usually dank, bleak dungeons into a richly decorated chamber softly illuminated by an array of levitating Chinese Fireball lanterns. Fellow members of the Slug Club stood in clusters and danced around an elaborate fountain sculpted from marbled white chocolate; thick, milky chocolate drizzled from the fountain.
Students passed a gilded ladle around to fill their goblets full of churned, frothing malt chocolate. Some students dipped anything they could get their hands on in the fountain: cauldron cakes, hickory smoked sausage, potato puffs, strawberry banana cheesecake bites, pumpkin pasties, and candy-coated apples. By the opposite wall where Professor Slughorn's desk usually sat, a long table draped in a shimmering gold tablecloth was on the verge of buckling under the weight of a heady assortment of steaming pots, trays, and baskets full of food.
With a bottle of Firewhisky in hand, Severus was examining a tray of refreshments that had short, spiky, wriggling tentacles when he felt a hand on his arm. He jumped and turned to see Lily standing behind him, simply glowing in loveliness. The white dress robes she wore complimented her soft curves and pale, freckled skin. Two small, sandaled feet peeked out from the hem of her long dress and glittered in the soft lantern light. Parts of her hair were pinned away from her face with little clips, while the rest was left to tumble down her shoulders and back in loose curls. His stomach lurched and suddenly his mouth felt incredibly dry. Severus cleared his throat and gestured to her outfit.
"That's new," he commented.
He appeared calm and collected but underneath it all, he was shaking
"Yeah, my mum sent it to me as an early Christmas present" she explained, looking down at her dress as well. She glanced back up at him with a small smile. "Do you like it?
Severus tore his eyes away from her dress and tried to maintain eye contact. Pursing his lips, he murmured a quiet, "Mmm-hmm."
While Severus was busy recollecting himself, Lily slowly turned in a full-circle to examine the party decorations.
"Wow," she said appraisingly. 'Professor Slughorn has really outdone himself this year."
Severus shrugged. "It's a little too busy for me," he said.
Lily faced him and regarded him with a knowing look.
"If you were in charge of planning a party, I would expect it to be dreary and dark with the lingering stench of formaldehyde in the air. And the only person you would invite is me, and we probably would spend time studying or reading."
Severus smirked and drew himself up to his full height.
"That may be so," he began, "but you're missing a key point. If I were in charge of a party, everything would be decorated in silver and green to remind everyone which house is best, particularly one brawny, red-haired, know-it-all Gryffindor."
Lily's mouth fell open. She stared at him for a moment, half-shocked and half-amused, as her mind busily tried to piece together a worthy comeback, though it was in vain.
She pointed at him and said in a hushed voice, "Alright, you win this one but I would watch your back if I were you."
Severus couldn't resist feeling a little smug. He cleared his throat again.
"Want one?" he offered stiffly, waving his hand jerkily toward the little creatures with wriggling tentacles.
"What in Merlin's name is that?" she exclaimed in a mixture of curiosity and disgust, inching forward to get a better look.
"Slughorn's idea of exotic party favors, no doubt," Severus said dryly, curling his upper lip.
"Don't touch it," he advised, as Lily made to poke one of the slimy creatures with her forefinger. "I think it's still alive."
"I'll save myself a trip to the hospital wing and have a cauldron cake instead," Lily settled, plucking one from a silver tray. "Sometimes the path less traveled is best left that way."
She took an unceremoniously large bite out of her cauldron cake. Severus snorted softly.
"What?" she asked with her mouth full, spraying bits of cake as she spoke.
He shook his head. "Nothing. I just like that you're not lacquered over like other girls."
Lily tilted her head to the side. "What do you mean by that?"
Severus sipped his Firewhisky and winced, though he tried to hide it in order to impress her.
"You're not afraid to eat like a pig," he explained simply.
Lily grinned widely to show off her brown, chocolate-stained teeth.
"You like me because of the way I eat?" she said in a terrible American Western accent.
Her father loved to watch shows about cowboys and Indians on the telly, though Severus figured Lily hadn't partaken of them as often; otherwise, she would've sounded more like a human being than a diseased grindylow.
Severus gave her a stern look, which only made her smile wider. The corner of his mouth twitched and his eyes glittered strangely in the low light.
He leaned in and quietly, he said: "One of the reasons, yes."
Lily blushed prettily and Severus quickly broke eye contact and swallowed more Firewhisky to calm his nerves. He hoped the drink would relax him to the point of asking her to dance. Usually, Severus refused to dance under any circumstance; but tonight would be different because for the second time in his young life, he would cease to be a coward.
The one time Lily and Severus had danced together was the summer before third year. Lily had received a record player from her parents as a welcome home present and naturally, she dragged Severus along to dance with her in her bedroom when it was too hot to play outside or the little clearing by the river was swarmed with mosquitos. Actually, come to think of it, she had done most of the dancing. Severus had merely stood there, swaying rigidly from side to side, as Lily had whipped around the room, flipping her hair like a disco queen, her off-tune voice eclipsing those of ABBA and the Bee Gees. Severus had finally drawn the line at learning to do the Hustle, insisting he would be perfectly content to watch her from his perch on her bed.
"You look nice too, by the way," Lily said in between small bites of cauldron cake, interrupting his train of thought.
Severus stared at her blankly. "What?"
"You look nice tonight," she repeated in equal measures of flirtation and uncertainty. She flashed him a smile for good measure.
Severus blinked. "You don't have to do that," he said.
It was Lily's turn to be taken aback. "Do what?" she asked.
"Just because I complimented you, doesn't mean you have to return the favor," he explained in earnest. "I've looked in the mirror before; I know what I look like. Not even you can fool me."
Lily looked sad and mildly affronted. "What if I were being honest?" she retorted lightly.
Severus scoffed and crossed his arms. "I doubt it," he said as he looked down his hawk-like nose at her. "You're kind to everyone, even Peeves."
Lily stepped back and placed her free hand on her hip.
"Well, look how far being nasty to Peeves has gotten you," she said. "At least he doesn't pelt me with water balloons at three in the morning. You should learn to take a few compliments here and there. Merlin forbid, they might make you a little less grouchy!"
Severus opened his mouth, ready to protest, but Lily was quicker; she stuffed the remainder of her cauldron cake in his mouth to keep him quiet.
"And for the record," she said, crossing her arms and looking him pointedly in the eye, "maybe I like the way you look."
At that moment, a jolly voice boomed from behind them, startling them both. Severus choked on the cauldron cake.
It seemed for the time being, Lily had won both the battle and the war but he would not let her escape so easily; he still had a lot of questions he needed answers to and writhing uncertainties that needed her assurance.
"Oh ho, there you are my star pupils!"
Professor Slughorn suddenly wedged himself between them like an over-excited rhinoceros. In one unsteady hand, he clutched a crystal wine glass filled to the brim with a dark, elf-made wine. The redness of his face and his bleary-eyed grin indicated that it wasn't the first glass he'd had that night and certainly wouldn't be the last.
"So happy you could make it," he hiccupped, swaying slightly. "You could never know… you don't know how much it means to me…."He waved his pudgy arm dramatically through the air, sloshing his wine.
"Careful!" Lily said, quickly grabbing Professor Slughorn's arm to stabilize him. "Professor, perhaps you should sit down… I think you've had too much to drink…"
"Nonsense!" he hiccupped, waving her off. "The party has just begun! Oh, my Lily. My Lovely Lily, you are so good… so kind to your dear, old professor…"
Severus deftly snatched Professor Slughorn's wine glass and spilled the contents into the pot of the nearest decorative plant. He replaced the empty wine glass in the professor's hand without him ever realizing its absence. Professor Slughorn clapped Lily jovially on the back, and then promptly turned to Severus.
"And you, my boy," he said, firmly clasping the back of Severus's neck and staring blearily into his thin, sallow face. "The best Potions student I've ever had… Brilliant, you are…"
Severus glanced over the professor's bald head at Lily, fighting to withhold his smirk. Just then, without warning, Professor Slughorn reeled Severus in by the neck and laid a smacking kiss on his cheek. Severus stumbled backward, horror-struck. Without another word, Professor Slughorn ambled away into the thick crowd. A portly boy in chocolate-stained, canary yellow robes bounced off Professor Slughorn's round belly as he brushed past.
Severus stared daggers at the professor's retreating form and roughly wiped his cheek with the sleeve of his robe.
"Was that necessary?" he muttered, sour-faced.
Lily looked after Professor Slughorn, concerned yet also amused.
"D'you think he's all right?" she asked, wincing as he tripped on the hem of his robe and rolled to the floor.
Severus felt inclined to state the obvious.
"He's completely pissed," he replied, as Regulus Black and his silver-haired date helped him clamber to his feet.
"D'you think we should keep an eye on him, in case he feels inclined to gallop through the castle stark naked?" she whispered with a mischievous grin.
Severus groaned audibly and buried his face in his hands.
"Lily," he pleaded.
"What?" she shrugged, innocent as can be.
He uncovered his face and scowled at her. Lily nearly choked on her suppressed laughter. Severus promptly turned on his heel and began to walk away.
"Where do you think you're going?" she called after him incredulously.
"I need to wash my face," he said.
Lily chuckled and settled her gaze on the boy in chocolate-stained, canary yellow robes lying comatose on the floor; apparently, he'd had a little too much fun with the chocolate fountain that evening. Her eyes wandered to the dance floor and she wondered if Severus planned on asking her to dance. Knowing him, he could have a ball simply standing beside the snack table, making fun of everyone else at the party, so it seemed unlikely that he would. However, the night was young and Severus seemed to be full of surprises lately.
Lily didn't have too much time to dwell on these thoughts for an all-too-familiar voice breathed huskily into her ear: "Hello, my turtle dove. We meet again."
A/N: Thus concludes part one of the Slug Club Christmas party extravaganza. The second part is nearly finished and should be posted within a week. I hope you enjoyed this latest installment and that you are all doing well!
P.S. I may be a few years off with the timing of music groups like ABBA and the Bee Gees and the Hustle song/dance, but I couldn't resist including them.