A/N Hi guys! I'm back with an update. This is another really long chapter. Almost 3000 words! That's longer than the last one.
Thank you to everybody who favourite and followed and thank you to those who reviewed.
I don't own TVD nor TO. All mistakes are my own.
See you at the bottom!
Chapter 10
Chicago, 2031
My heart was beating fast in my chest. It was completely dark save for the light of the moon that shone brightly in the night sky. It was very hard to make out any of my surroundings with the tears that were streaming down my face. I knew that I was somewhere in the middle of the woods near our property. My shoes were all muddy and I knew that I would have lots of bruises on my legs in the morning because in my hastiness I stumbled on tree roots several times. Despite the throbbing pain in my legs I kept on running.
The woods were eerily quiet and the only thing I could hear was my hard breathing and she occasional gasp. Every once in a while I would hear my uncles and my dad calling out my name. I knew it wasn't fair of me to just run off, because they were probably worried sick, but I just couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't deal with the fact that I'd almost killed my best friend today.
Like every Friday night, Claire had come over to my place to watch a movie. Just as we were settling in on the couch, my father stormed in with a letter in his hand and a furious scowl on his face. The letter was from one of my teachers informing him that I had had to go to detention. It wouldn't have been such a big deal, but that was the first time I'd ever gotten detention and I was a very good student and always brought home very high marks so getting detention or even getting told of was something that didn't happen often if at all. So of course my dad was shocked. He demanded that we talk right this instance and wanted to send Claire home. Of course I didn't want that to happen so we started to argue. What started as an argument ended up in me breaking all the glass vases and the windows.
And that was how I'd come to be running around in the woods on a Friday night. I knew I was acting like a coward by running away but I just couldn't stand to be around people at the moment.
Over the last year my control over my magic had gradually gotten worse and worse. No matter how many hours a week I practiced with Ava, it still got out of hand. There were days that I just didn't want to go out of the house, afraid that I would hurt someone. But I couldn't live my whole live imprisoned in my bedroom, that wouldn't even be a real life. But as I was running around in the woods a life in my bedroom, away from the world and the people I could hurt, sounded more appealing by the second.
My family's shouting got louder and I knew that they were close now. Not wanting to talk to them I ran in a different direction and sped up my pace, which proved to be difficult with my throbbing leg.
"Caitlin." I heard my father's voice loud and clearly. He was standing a few feet to my right and looked at me with worried eyes. He looked up and down my body, scanning me for any injuries. When he was done looking me over he took a few strides forward but I held up my hands.
"Don't come near me! I don't want to hurt you."
He didn't listen to me and just took my outstretched hands in to his and pulled me in for an embrace. With one hand he stocked my back calmingly and with the other he stocked my hair. We stood there for what felt like hours until I broke the silence.
"I can't do this anymore dad. My magic is getting out of hand. I can't control it anymore."
"We'll figure something out." He tried to reassure me but it only made me angry.
I angrily shook his hands away and took a step back. "What if we don't? What'll happen the next time I get angry or sad huh? What if someone I love dies? What if something happens to Kat or Claire or Lexi or Adam? What will we do then? I'm like a ticking time bomb!" I screamed at him.
He put his hands on my shoulders to try and calm me down. "You are going to be okay." He said firmly in a tone of voice that didn't leave room for any discussions.
"I'm afraid." I whispered quietly.
"Sometimes we must face our fears sweetheart. The brave may not live forever but the cautious do not live at all."
oOo
Chicago, 2013
I was sat on a bench just outside my old high school. After I'd hurt my father and uncle, I took the next plane to here. I knew that I'd eventually had to go back to Mystic Falls because I didn't have a lot of time left until I would inevitably have to go and until then I still had a few things to get done there.
I was watching all the students streaming out of the school as it was already late afternoon and they were all going home to their families. As I watched them I couldn't help thinking of my own family. I wondered what they were doing right now, if they were angry. Klaus probably was. I didn't know about Elijah. He'd always seemed like the calm one. He'd always kept a cool demeanour in sticky situations and always acted rationally. But who knows? Maybe he'd acted differently just like Klaus. This Klaus wasn't the sweet and loving father that I knew. This Klaus was ruthless, heartless, a monster.
I looked down at my hands. I had done so many horrible things, killed so many innocent people. So really, who was I to judge?
oOo
Chicago, 2032
"How could you?!" I angrily screamed at him.
"I am sorry Cait! It was a mistake. We were drunk."
"No stop! Just stop! I'm sick of hearing your lame excuses!"
"Please forgive me?" He pleaded.
"You cheated on me Adam. So no, I can't forgive you." I went to turn around but he took my hand and pulled me back around. He cupped my cheek with one hand and softly stroked my cheek. It would usually calm me down but now I just felt disgusted.
"I love you Caitlin. Please don't throw away what we have because of one small mistake."
That made me really angry. How dare he? I slapped his hand away and took a few steps back to bring some distance between us.
"A small mistake you say? I trusted you! I loved you!" I screamed and took a few steps forward. I saw him flinch. I should have stopped then but I was in full flow. From the corner of my eye I saw a framed picture of us at some party. We looked so happy. I was looking up at him with a content smile on my face and he had his arm around me and was smiling into the camera. That memory seemed so distant as if it happened 8 years ago and not 8 months.
I took it from its place. "Two years of my life I've wasted with you. I won't waste another second." I said eerily calm and threw the picture against a wall.
With that I walked out of his house and I somehow managed not to break down or have a crying fit. Once I was outside I leaned against the house wall and lowly slid down then I gave vent to my feelings. I just sat there on the floor and cried. Then my despair turned into flaming hot anger. I was angry at Adam, at myself, at the whole world. My feelings were overwhelming me. I couldn't take it anymore. So I just opened my mouth and screamed as loudly as I could.
I only stopped screaming when the earth suddenly began to quake. Everything around me shook. I started to panic but as suddenly as it began it stopped. 'Did I do this?' I thought in horror. I quickly scrambled to my feet and ran the whole 20 blocks home to my house. What usually took me an hour took me more than 3 hours today because there were splits in the streets and I had to take some detours.
The moment I walked through the front door, I was enveloped in a hug. I could smell a woodsy scent and I instantly knew it was my father. He drew back and stroked my hair.
"I was so worried about you. Thank god you weren't near the shore" He said still stroking my hair.
I felt cold inside. "Why what happened?" I asked trying to keep my voice calm but failing miserably.
"There was a massive earthquake and it generated a tsunami. The whole coast was affected. There were massive floods." 'No no no no no' I thought. 'This can't be happening!'
"How many deaths?" I whispered.
"They don't know the exact number yet, it's only been a few hours but they reckon about 700.000."
"What?!" I killed 700.000 people. I was a murderer. I destroyed families. All these innocent people were killed because of me. It was all my fault. And all because I couldn't control my magic.
Somehow I got a grip on myself. "I need to go to Claire." I said monotonously and walked away. That was the last time my father saw me. Only at the time neither of us knew it.
oOo
Like I'd said I would, I went to Claire's but not without getting a few belongings of my room first.
When I arrived at Claire's she and her brother were the only ones there because her parents had to stay at their workplaces until it was safe to walk the streets again. But they probably didn't mind the extra time at work. Both her parents worked in the financial business and were super workaholics. They often worked till late into the night and Claire often stayed overnight because she didn't want to be alone at home when her brother was out on some party. I didn't really mind because I enjoyed our sleepovers. It was the only time when I could really relax and when I didn't have to worry about my magic getting out of hand.
She also hugged me just like my father had. But when she pulled away and saw my tear stained face, she quickly pulled me into her room and locked the door.
We sat on her bed for a while, me just staring into space and her silently looking at me with concern written on her face.
"Caitlin what happened?" She eventually asked concerned.
I exhaled slowly. "I was at Adam's." I explained. She nodded urging me on. "Because I found out that he cheated on me."
"What?" Claire interrupted me. "That dumbcunt. Who was it? I am so going to kill the bitch."
"It doesn't matter. I have bigger problems." I said."After I confronted him he told me all kinds of excuses that I didn't believe of course and then I angrily left. And.. I was just so completely angry at him, at myself, at everybody so I just screamed and let my anger out. And then the earth started to shake."
By the look on her face I could tell that she'd figured out where I was going. "You mean.." She trailed off.
"I am responsible for the earthquake and the tsunami. All those people died because of me." I said barely holding the tears in.
"Oh Cait." She said and pulled me into a hug. We sat there for a long time. I cried and she rubbed my back reassuringly.
Finally I decided that I'd cried enough. I pulled away and stood from the bed and got the bag that I brought with me. I pulled out various grimoires and lay them on a pile on Claire's bed. Lucky for me, my uncle Kol had an obsession with witches so we had dozens of grimoires lying around at the house.
"I didn't come here because I wanted your pity, but because I need your help." I said.
"Help with what?" She asked me.
"I need to find a spell that is in one of those books." I said and pointed to the pile of books on her bed.
"Of course." She said and opened the first one. "What kind of spell are we looking for?" Claire asked.
"A time travel spell." I said as casually as possible.
"No." She instantly said and stood up. "Are you crazy? What will your father do when he finds out you time travelled? You'll have house arrest for the rest of your life! You'll probably have to move away and we'll never see each other again!"
"He won't remember." She looked at me confused so I elaborated. "I don't just want to go back in time to a few hours ago. I want to travel back to 2012. I want to prevent all these horrible things that have happened." Claire still looked confused. "I killed those people today, my mother died because of me. But if I'm never born that won't happen."
"No!" She said again.
"Think about it Claire! I can't continue to live like this. My control will only get worse. How many lives will I take the next time I get angry? If I travel back and prevent my birth I won't only save the people I killed today, but also my mother." I tried to reason with her.
"Caitlin this is madness!"
I huffed. "Fine then don't help me. I'll find the spell on my own." I said and went to put the books away.
"Wait!" Claire said. "Of course I'll help you. You're my best friend."
I smiled and then we spent the next few hours looking through the grimoires. Finally I found a spell that could work.
"I think I found something. This spell looks promising." I announced. "But I need a few things."
"What do you need?" Claire asked.
"I need a metal bowl, a knife, some candles, a pen and a piece of paper."
"Okay we have all these things here. I'll just get them." I smiled at her gratefully. I knew how hard it must be for her. She was basically helping me to die.
I just hoped that the spell would work. Time travel spells were very tricky and often they didn't work or they only worked for a short period of time. Before I could think more she returned.
She laid all the supplies on the floor. "Are you really sure you want to do this?" She asked me for what seemed like the hundredth time.
"I am sure." My voice even despite of my nervousness.
"I will miss you so much." She said her eyes glistening with tears. I quickly went to her and hugged her.
"I want you to know that although I won't remember you, you will always be my best friend." She said drawing back and wiping her tears away.
"As you will always be mine." I said and hugged her one last time. God I would miss her so much.
After our tearful goodbye we both got serious and I kneeled down. Claire placed the candles in a circle around me and with a sweep of my hand they all lit up. After that I cut open my palm with the knife and let a few drops of blood drop into the bowl. After there was a good amount of blood in the bowl, I took the pen and piece of paper and wrote MMXII –2012 in roman numerals, AKA the year that I wanted to travel to– on it. Then I crumpled it into a ball and put it in the bowl. I smiled reassuringly at Claire and gave her a slight wave because I knew that words would fail me. She waved back and gave me a sad smile. I then concentrated really hard and began to chant." Lama Exu Quera Vasa Aperum Atha Lama Exu Quera Vasa Aperum Atha Lama Exu Quera Vasa Aperum Atha Lama Exu Quera Vasa Aperum Atha." I got louder and louder until I felt a slight wind on my face and heard a whoosh.
Slowly I opened my eyes and looked at my environment. I was still sitting but instead of Claire's red, fluffy carpet, I was on the hard ground. I wasn't in Claire's room anymore, I was outside. Everywhere around me were trees and bushes. But it didn't seem like I was in a park either because I couldn't spot any paths or benches. And everything looked so overgrown. I flinched when I hear a howl in the distance. Then suddenly it hit me.
"Shit!" I swore."Shit shit shit shit shit!"
I had a feeling that I wasn't in 2012.
oOo
It had got dark so I decided to head back to my hotel. I thought about my father. The brave may not live forever but the cautious do not live at all. He was right. I had done the cowardly thing with travelling back in time. Instead of facing my fears and doing something about it, I chose the easy way out. And where did that get me? To the wrong time and to a lot of problems.
My thoughts were interrupted by a shrill ringing. I fished my phone out of my bag and looked at the caller ID. April was calling me. Before I went, I enlisted April with the task of keeping me informed of what was happening in Mystic Falls. "Hello?" I answered.
"Katherine's in trouble."
A/N I really hope that a few of your questions have been answered. We now know why Caitlin travelled back in time but we don't know to which time she travelled and what went wrong. But don't fret! You'll find out soon ;)
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Until next time..