Ren's Note:
The ending chapters, under the theme heading Pray, diverge from my usual storytelling as a more thorough retelling rather than my previous dabbling with just the important scenes.
I also wanted this to be one big chapter, but once I hit 9,000 words with 5 sections still to go, I decided to spare your scrollbar the exercise. Plus I wanted to give it a solid go rather than constantly self-edit based on my personal hatred of huge chapters. I really hate huge chapters and the time it takes to write huge chapters. Ren likey smaller chapters more frequently over long-ass ones few and far between.
Kalahira, mistress of inscrutable depths, I ask forgiveness...
Dull thumps and high-pitched crashes pressed all around on Shepard, interrupting his brief respite. He cautiously opened an eye that he immediately regretted, as searing light and blurring shapes dipped in and out of view. Closer still, voices murmured in his earpiece that he could barely make sense of, let alone respond to.
"Hammer's wiped out! All forces, retreat!"
No retreat. No surrender. …Get up. Assess. Decide. Act. But get up, first. You have to get up, Shepard. It wasn't his usual Commander Mode in charge anymore. The voice, the determination, it wasn't his. But it was nonetheless familiar.
Obeying, Shepard groaned his way upright. His hands felt like they were on fire and a dull ache in his head competed with throbbing twinges in his chest and legs. Only the soldier in his head could order himself to climb to his feet, take in his surroundings and get going.
She'd said, "I can do this!" …I know you can, Ash. I know you'd be right here with me, but I couldn't risk it. I'd rather you hate me alive than love me dead.
A Carnifex pistol lay on the ground nearby, its owner half-buried and still under a fallen dropship's wing. The simple act of leaning down, picking up the weapon and checking its heatsink exhausted Shepard. His right hand spasmed and clenched the grip tightly, while his other useless arm served to balance a hunched, loping walk.
"Tsk. Now what will it take to prove I'm in prime condition, Skipper?" ...The beam. It's right there. You can make it. One foot. In front of the other. Double-time, soldier.
The energy drawing off the teleportation beam was a loud, high frequency whine at this distance, but was just uncomfortable enough to keep Shepard's heavily-lidded eyes open. Suddenly, three husks shambled out from behind the rubble of a nearby Mako, apparently catching Shepard's scent. Just lifting the pistol was agony for the Commander, but he steadied his pained breaths to sight and fell one enemy after the other. The last husk was only inches from Shepard's chest before an incendiary round to the skull stopped it.
Agony stabbed Shepard's gut as a shadow crossed his vision. Further back, a skeletal turian marauder reloaded the heatsink in its SMG. Staggering, it took Shepard precious seconds to balance his aim while his left hand pressed to the fresh wound in his abdomen. A hardier foe, it took Shepard far more than two shots to first strike shoulders and hands then finish the creature off with a final bullet to the throat.
Shepard wasn't sure how close he got to the beam before his pistol fell from numb fingers. His legs put up a tremendous fight simply lifting up and setting down, one then the other. He didn't so much as walk as fall, head-first, into the wide landing pad where the transporter beam sat. Take it easy, Skipper. You made it. Just a little further, then we can go home, a comforting voice consoled.
He briefly saw Earth getting smaller and smaller below his feet, but didn't have the energy to turn and look where he was going above into the brightening light. How did I get here? was the last thing Shepard wondered before he blacked out again.
Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name...
Ash wasn't really sure why that particular prayer leapt into her mind, and in formal old English no less. She'd been mentally praying a lot lately. But it provided a bit of comfort as she hobbled out of the med bay with Liara yelling behind her to wait. Thankfully, Dr. Chakwas had other patients to care for so she abandoned the lecture poised on her lips and turned back to the three other cots filled with groaning soldiers.
Pausing outside the med bay, Ashley's Omni-tool glowed to life as she tapped back into the Alliance comm feed. Clipped sentences suddenly popped into her earpiece, before a shout drowned them all out.
"Hammer's wiped out! All forces, retreat!"
Ashley felt that comm's desperate female voice deep in her gut. The dull ache of her injuries briefly flared back into unbearable territory as hope was overridden by despair. Rise above it, Williams. Anderson wanted the Normandy to be the Alliance's mobile command center, and that's exactly what they're going to get. A few deep breaths pushed the searing fingers back into mental containment, though Ashley's limp was more noticeable.
Every operative running through the crew deck paused upon seeing Ashley's disheveled appearance. The Lieutenant Commander's blue Spectre jacket was torn in jagged strips across her midriff, exposing a bloodied undershirt. Her tall officer's boots were stained and the right thigh had medi-gel-soaked gauze wrapped tightly around it. She waved them away with a challenging glare.
We still have the Crucible. Shepard is still down there. "There's always hope. It's how we got this far." Copy that, Commander.
Liara T'Soni once more shouted for her to return to the med bay, which Ashley again ignored. Instead, she swiped a finger over her Omni-tool to page Joker up on Deck 2.
"What's the status, Joker?" A bearded face popped onto the small handheld screen, but its eyes were focused elsewhere. "Picked up Garrus and Tali back at the FOB, though they headed to the war room to coordinate their own fleets. They're lucky we don't stick them with long-distance charges... That quantum entanglement comm ain't cheap, y'know."
"We'll send the turians and quarians a bill when the war is over," Ashley sidestepped, both Joker's grumbling and literally Liara as the asari again attempted to stop her. "What about the other ground crew?"
"EDI, her body, I mean, is already back in the co-pilot chair. Prothy is probably sulking in his quarters on Engineering because he didn't get to ride a Reaper like a cowboy." Ashley swept her right hand over the green holo to summon the elevator, but kept her eyes on Joker.
"What about James?" A pause from Joker. "He wouldn't leave Earth. He said he wouldn't abandon it again." Ashley chewed her lip, sad about Vega's absence but more sad she didn't think of it first. Maybe because you got shot four times, Williams? Because Shepard made you? ...Shut up, Brain. I get it. At least Vega's got Franchesca. I put enough firepower in that shotgun to make it practically illegal in Citadel space. He could take down a thresher maw with that damn thing. He'll be okay, she prayed.
"Ashley!" Liara's voice interrupted Ash's train of thought. Fine, T'Soni. You caught me. "Joker, I'll be up in a minute to organize sitreps with Specialist Traynor on Hackett's strike on the Citadel. Williams out." Ash swept her fingertips over the Omni-tool interface, closing the comm channel. "I don't have time for this, Liara. I can walk, so I can work. They need us down there." And so does Shepard.
"I was not going to force you back into the med bay. By the Goddess, you're as stubborn as Shepard sometimes. I know better," the asari crossed her arms.
"Oh... then what do you need, T'Soni?" The elevator opened, but Ashley wasn't fast enough to dart through it to escape Liara. The Shadow Broker blocked Ash's access to the elevator controls.
"I have ...something for you." Ashley raised her eyebrows, her expression asking what she couldn't say without biting sarcasm, Well? What is it?
"When I said for farewell to Shepard at the operations base, I joined my consciousness to his," Liara held up her hand to defend her actions before Ash's mind could jump to several conclusions, none of them pleasant. "It's not what you think, Ashley. It was merely an asari goodbye, a custom."
"Fine. I believe you. Explain it to me in small words so my little human mind can understand," Ash couldn't help angrily retorting. She doesn't deserve that, Williams. …Hey Brain, she spent months jumping into Shepard's head back on the SR-1, and need I remind you the way she looked at him? And still does, sometimes? …You owe her the benefit of the doubt.
Sighing, Ashley pressed her fingertips to the bridge of her nose, then smoothed them over her eyebrows. "…I'm sorry, Liara. I do believe you. Please, tell me what went on." The asari just looked so damned earnest that Ash felt briefly ashamed for her accusation. Briefly. …I never claimed I was good at being mature, Brain.
"I offered him some of my memories as a gift, a thank-you for all Shepard had done for me. But he left me something in return, to give to you." Ash waited a moment, hoping for further explanation, "…I don't understand."
"He had memories... Things he meant for you but was unable to say," Liara's voice was thick with emotion but her face was impassive. Even after three years, she struggled to restrain the affection she'd developed for Commander Shepard. It still bounced tumultuously between deep respect and quiet attraction. And the last thing she wanted to do was lose that grip in front of Ashley. "He …asked me to give them to you, in case he—"
Ash cut Liara off. "He's not dead." We're not going through this again. Shepard is down there and we're going to find him.
"I want to believe that, too," Liara sadly agreed. "But all the same, I would like to give you what he shared with me." She held a blue hand over Ashley's that hovered above the call button for the CIC. "Please, Ashley. Trust me. It will only take a moment. Joker can handle the Normandy for a moment."
"...Show me."