Chapter 11
They had a supper of pasta and sauce, some bread, a salad and a small cherry pie. The lady who worked at the store said the pie was made locally and it was to die for. Taking her word for it, they got one. She was right, it was delicious. They ate the whole thing.
They were wearing only boxers and t-shirts and they were lying on the sofa, barefoot. The television was on but the sound was muted. Jackson was lying with his head resting on Aaron's chest. He could hear and feel his breathing, and he could hear his heart beating.
"Is your heart beating for me," Jackson asked in a romantic way, batting his eyelashes.
Aaron smiled at him. He let his fingers twist and move through his boyfriend's curly hair then, slowly and delicately, he ran the tip of his index finger along the bridge of his nose. Resting his hands on Jackson's chest, he said, "My heart always beats for you, you know that. It has since the day I saw you.
"Mind you, I probably wouldn't have admitted that to myself at first, but it did. You freaked me out when I saw you with Paddy, when you brought back my phone, but from that moment, I knew there was something."
"I know. Same with me. After I dropped the phone off, I was so hoping you'd call me, I was so curious about you, I thought you were hot and fit. What was I thinking, eh?" he teased.
"Well, you certainly didn't think I'd chin you, did you? I still feel bad about that, how stupid was I? All you wanted to do was be nice to me, get me to come along and join the others to go into town."
"That's in the past, Aaron, no need to think about that anymore. We've moved on, you've done a great deal of growing up since then, same with me. I am so proud of you, I hope you know that."
"Yeah, I do, and thanks for sticking by me and helping me so much through all these years. Well, actually, for loving me. You have the patience of a saint." He leant over Jackson's face and kissed him tenderly, their lips brushing lightly.
"You got that right. But I also have two hands and I am going to put them to good use." He got up and went to the toiletries bag in the bathroom and came back with the lube.
"And what have you got in mind?" Aaron asked, intrigued by what he had in his hands.
Jackson sat back on the sofa and took Aaron's legs and lifted them to place them on his lap. He then took some lube, rubbed it in his hands and took Aaron's right foot and started massaging it. He ran his thumbs along the arch, then under, and he took hold of his toes and slowly bent them down to extend the muscles from the top of his foot. He went back to the arch and again ran his thumbs under the foot, all along that sensitive skin. His movements were slow, attentive.
"Jay, what the hell… oh my god, that feels so good." Aaron had never had a foot massage before and he was now realising how fantastic and relaxing it felt. And how bloody erotic it was, too! He just let his head rest on the top of the sofa and enjoyed the moment.
Aaron had always taken good care of his body. Aside from being in good physical shape, he took great pains in making sure his hands were clean and his finger nails were free of grease and dirt from his work. Sure, he wore rubber gloves, like the other mechanics, but there were still times when he needed to take them off. He was always conscious of wanting to look good, and that meant his hands and nails had to be clean when he was not at the garage. It was not a question of being vain, it was just a matter of principle. Same thing with his feet. His nails were always clean and trimmed very short. He actually used a special brush to scrub his feet and toes clean with plenty of soap. It was his little secret that he had managed to keep from Jackson. Aside from the cleaning aspect, it was something that felt good. Maybe not as good as what Jackson was doing now, but pretty close.
Jackson was enjoying this time with Aaron, this moment of closeness and intimacy. After massaging his right foot, he moved to his left foot and started the same process. Aaron was still feeling blissful. He just couldn't believe how good it made him feel. After a moment, Jackson's hands moved slowly up Aaron's left leg to rest on his knee. The heat from his hands was transferred to the knee and the muscles there and it was soothing. Jackson then started massaging this area slowly, going around the kneecap, around and back behind the leg, making sure it was done smoothly and softly. He then ran his fingers along the scar left by the operation and when Aaron felt that, his eyes shot open. He didn't want Jackson to pay too much attention to that area, but at the same, he realised how silly he was. It really didn't matter, this was Jackson, not some stranger. So it was okay for him to see and touch this flaw in his body. He knew Jackson didn't care, even if, in the back of his mind, he himself still felt a tinge of insecurity about it.
After the talk he had with Cain, he knew better than to continue to feel insecure about this. Jackson didn't care about the scar, nor should he.
Jackson actually sensed that Aaron became tense, and he finally figured out why. Looking into his boyfriend's eyes, holding his gaze, he leant forward and deposited small kisses all along the scar. Aaron's eyes were darting nervously between Jackson's face and his knee, and he finally realised how stupid he had been. He realised that Jackson had also figured it out.
"Why are you so tense? Are you worried about something?"
"Jackson, I… I feel really stupid. I hope you're not going to get mad at me." He felt hesitant, wasn't sure how Jackson would react to what he was about to tell him. "For a bit there, I was worried that I would be… less attractive."
"What do you mean, less attractive?" Jackson was truly puzzled by what he said.
"You know, with a limp and the scar, I mean, why would you still want me as much?"
"Aaron, are you serious?" Jackson couldn't believe him. He wasn't mad at him, but he was disappointed, he thought Aaron would know by now the love he had for him, and that a limp and a scar were not going to be changing that. He was not disappointed in Aaron per se, but disappointed in the fact Aaron still had insecurities like that.
"I know… like I said, I really feel stupid," Aaron said, sheepishly, looking at Jackson with eyes that said he felt sorry for being such an idiot.
"Why would I still want you? Geez, I don't know, let me think about it for a minute," Jackson retorted, being his sarcastic self. "Your money, the great big home you have, I don't know… Aaron, you are such a prat when you want, and that's one thing I love about you. Do you really think a limp and this scar are going to make me look at you differently?"
"Erm… well, I suppose I should say no."
"You're right, you should say no." Jackson's voice was calm and he had a reassuring smile on his face. "After all we've been through, my love for you goes beyond that. My love for you is for your person, the way you are with me, the way you are now since you've changed so much. And I understand that you still have insecurities, I suppose I have some myself about certain things, but you don't need to worry about it. You really don't. I won't ditch you because of your huge flaws," he said with an exagerated emphasis on the last two words, just to show him how silly he was.
"Jackson! That's not funny!" Aaron didn't know how to take his boyfriend sometimes, although he figured out he was winding him up a bit with that last comment.
"It is funny, Aaron, in the sense that this is nothing, it should be nothing. Trust me, it's going to take a lot more than that for me to change my mind about you. So stop worrying." As he said that, he planted one last kiss on Aaron's knee and finished his massage around his leg, letting his fingers trail along his finely shaped calf.
Aaron was finally reassured by Jackson's words. He could finally let this go. Well, he'd try. Now that he was more relaxed again, he let himself back in the hands of Jackson, in a manner of speaking. When Jackson was done with the massage, he looked at his boyfriend and suggested they move to the bedroom. Aaron didn't need any convincing. The invitation came from the most gorgeous man he knew and loved, and that was all he needed.
Aaron was in a good place. The day had been very nice. He had just been treated to a foot massage by his boyfriend, something that was totally new to him. He was thinking how much he had changed over the past few years, how much he had grown as a young gay man. He was particularly surprised by how much he had grown into loving the closeness, the intimate moments with his boyfriend, a man. This revelation was amazing to him. This young man who, at one time, didn't want people to think he was like that, now just couldn't see the point of trying to live a lie with a woman by pretending to be straight. Pretending is what does your head in. He had learned that lesson.
They were relaxing in bed, comfortable under the duvet. Slowly, Aaron got on his knees and straddled Jackson's hips, sitting back with his ass crack fitting tightly over Jackson's cock, the boys being very aware of that perfect fit.
Aaron looked at his boyfriend, he admired the beauty of his features, he found pure pleasure in being aware of Jackson's beauty, in liking it, in realising how good it made him feel, he just couldn't believe he was thinking like that! But it felt so good! He put his hands on Jackson's chest, letting them rest there, feeling the heat emanating from the skin under them. He let his fingers run over Jackson's pectorals, slightly rubbing his nipples, taking his time. He then moved his fingertips along Jackson's jawline, feeling his beard, enjoying the prickly sensation, being careful with his movements. His fingers rose to his eyebrows, he detailed the line over his eyes, felt the softness of his brows, of the skin on his forehead. Afterwards, he pushed his fingers through Jackson's curly hair, slowly, as if they were a big comb. He then brought his hands down a bit to cup Jackson's face, delicately, with love. All the while, he was looking at his lover and he was enjoying himself immensely. He leant down and kissed him slowly, softly, then passionately.
"Can I ask why you're doing that?" Jackson said, his breath warm against Aaron's lips, "not that I mind!"
"Because I can," Aaron said simply, and Jackson smiled at his honest answer. "I am just realising how lucky I am. I have you to love, and I can be nice to you like this if I want to, without having to worry anymore. It took me long enough to learn and accept who I am, to accept your love, and I know there is still some learning to do, but right now, I know I can do this as much as I want and it feels so right, for both of us. I feel like another person."
Jackson was relishing this moment. "Well, this feels incredible for me. I love what you're doing. I love your intimate side, this side of you no one else ever gets to see. You should never forget how beautiful it is."
Aaron was blushing a bit now, but he was finally getting used to receiving that kind of compliments from Jackson, so he just smiled shyly at his boyfriend, a smile that said thank you, that said he understood what he was saying.
"You and I have great sex, as you know," Jackson said as he bucked his hips up against Aaron's buttocks to reinforce his message, "but this, this is as good as sex, in a different way. Do you understand what I mean?"
"Yeah, I do," Aaron replied. Still holding Jackson's gaze, he leant down and they exchanged a long, passionate kiss. Still holding on to each other, Aaron slipped on his side and the two of them cuddled, Aaron putting his arm over Jackson's chest, holding on to him as if he was afraid to lose him.