Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to the characters or anything associated with the Harry Potter universe. Mores the pity.
Since they had to wait for Malfoy to get dressed, Hermione decided to read Harry's letter again.
HOW DOES IT FEEL HAVING YOUR MUDBLOOD STOLEN AWAY BY BLOOD TRAITOR SCUM LIKE MALFOY? GET USED TO THE FEELING POTTER, THOSE YOU CHERISH AREN'T LONG FOR THIS SCHOOL.
Charming. At east it was slightly more informative than the one she and Draco had received. This one at least showed there was intent to not just get at the two of them, but all those who were instrumental in the way the final battle played out. Anyone who knew Harry knew the easiest way to hurt him was to hurt those he loves.
That narrowed it down by almost nothing, but it never hurt to make note of intentions she thought. "Where was this left?" she asked Harry, who was sitting on the wood of their small patio, dangling his legs off the edge. Harry had decided he wanted to have this conversation 'outside' as to give him and Draco breathing room. Hermione politely refrained from pointing out that their little forest was still very much indoors; she simply levitated some of the chairs outside. Why Harry decided to plop on the floor was anyone's guess.
"It was pinned to the wall outside the entrance to the Gryffindor common room. It was addressed to me and charmed so that only I could remove it. Ron thought it was a love note, the wanker. Anyway, that means it wasn't a Gryffindor. They would've had the password to get in and leave it somewhere I was more likely to find it." Harry stated, now swinging his legs to rustle the low vegetation. Hermione thought he must find the earthy smells relaxing because he seemed quite at ease considering they were discussing someone threatening them.
"Now now, Potter. One mustn't state suppositions as fact. There are quite a few reasons it could've been left where it was that in no way exclude a Gryffindor."
Draco joined them on the patio, still wet headed from his shower and dressed in lounge clothes. Obviously he wasn't planning on going anywhere which was good, because she planned on utilizing their combined intellect to make some sort of progress on whoever was leaving these notes. "What are you on about Malfoy, why wouldn't they leave it in my room if they had the opportunity?"
"Actually Harry, Draco's right. Whoever it was could've left in the corridor to avoid being seen coming in and out of your dorm."
Her Slytherin counterpart chimed in with, "Or to make you think you could knock all Gryffindors off the suspect list."
"It's even possible they wanted other people to see the note and ask about it out of a desire for sensationalism."
"Or maybe they just wanted to give me a chance to mock you for your presumptuousness."
Hermione rolled her eyes at that last one. Some things will never change. Harry flicked his eyes between the two of them with a look that was half annoyance half suspicion. "This whole you two teaming up on me thing? I'm not a fan." Harry said, clearly miffed that they'd shot down what he thought was progress. She glanced at Draco to share a knowing look with him and found him already looking her way. He smirked a bit, and then an odd expression stole his features before he looked away from her. Strange boy, she thought, I'll never understand him.
"Well what idea's have you lot got then?" Harry demanded. Draco, face back to it's usual bored facade, said, "Let's see this note Hermione so rudely interrupted my shower for then." His face and voice didn't change but the tops of his ears, barely visible under the wet tendrils of his platinum locks, went a faint pink color. Is he...Is Draco Malfoy blushing? Surely not! It's not like I ripped open his stall or anything, the great prude.
She rolled her eyes at his silly embarrassment. She hadn't seen anything other than his head and the tops of his chest and shoulders, the rest of his modesty was covered by the frosting of the glass.
Was she going to think about those shoulders and the way water droplets rolled down the definition of his muscles? Most definitely, right along with the way he'd touched her face and hair, and the memory of the slightly coarse hair on his abdomen rubbing against her lips. But right now, they had more important things to think about.
"Well," Harry said, drawing her from her inappropriate thoughts, "I have to be going or I'll be late to class. I just wanted to see if there was anything to the rumors but even though there is, I'm not sure how much help I'll be."
"Just let us know if anything else noteworthy happens Potter, Hermione and I are more than capable of handling the rest."
"All this given name business is very strange, you know that right?
Malfoy smirked and returned his attention to the note as if to let Harry know how little he cared about his comfort. Hermione shook her head and said, "I don't have any afternoon classes today but I did want to talk to you. Fancy some company to the end of the corridor?"
Harry nodded and headed back inside presumably towards the door. She looked at Draco and said, "You're not nearly as funny as you'd like to think, you know. That pun was awful and far too easy, I'm disappointed." He grinned at her, looking almost playful, and said "Even I'm not above low hanging fruit. But I'll pull out my A game from now on, yeah? Can't have you thinking you're the sharp one in this little duo." And then of all things, he winked at her. Hermione felt sure she would have started blushing had she not turned around and joined Harry. Damn her minimal experience with boys, she couldn't even bear harmless casual winks without working herself into a tizzy.
"Mione?" Harry said, once again pulling her out of herself. "I know you wanted to talk but I want to say something first if that's alright."
She was confused but allowed him to speak first with a short nod and an "Alright then, Harry."
He took a deep, steadying breath and trained his eyes on the walk ahead of them. "Look, I know I was out of line in Hogsmead, and again with the whole Ginny and Zabini thing." Hermione looked at her long time friend to see him running his hand through his hair in frustration. She found it endearing but fought the urge to smooth the unruly black mess back down.
"I can't apologize for Ron but I thought I was better than what I said. With the Lavender and Hannah thing, I swear I didn't know until we were already on our way so I couldn't warn you girls. And in the library... Hell I don't know, Hermione. I suppose I was just caught off guard. I - everyone - always thought it was going to be me and Ginny in the end. I wanted it to work so badly but it just didn't. When you said how happy she is with him, I guess I just felt sort of betrayed. Not by her of course, like you said she has every right to be happy, but by how things turned out. I hate not knowing how things will work out. It was supposed to be we defeat Voldemort, we graduate, we get jobs, then I ride off into the sunset with her while you and Ron did the same. So far, one of those has happened and another has gone totally cocked up. It makes the other two items on that list seem almost unattainable, especially when I'm struggling to get through all of my classes this year. I think Ginny moving on just felt like the final nail in that coffin. I'm not proud of how I acted, and I have every intention of apologizing to Ginny too whenever I see her. We were finally getting to be friends again, and I'll never forgive myself if I fucked that off."
Harry was a bit winded after his proclamation, and Hermione took a moment to just stare at er lone time friend. How remarkable that Harry could now admit to and try to make amends for his mistakes so easily. She herself had a hard time apologizing when she was in the wrong, hence why she made every effort to never be wrong. It hit her then that they truly were growing up. They were all legally recognized as adults but something about being at Hogwarts made her still think of them as children. Clearly, that wasn't the case.
"Harry, you know I'd always forgive you. Thank you for your wonderful apology, and I absolutely accept it." she told him, threading her arm through his and leaning her head on his shoulder. He was as familiar to her as her own self, and she hated being cross with him. "Though I'll admit, I'm not sure why that was so important to you to apologize to me for."
"Not done with the apologizing yet, Mione. I want to apologize for how I acted about your friendship with Malfoy too. I didn't blow up on you about it like some people, but I was thinking the same things. Ron and I are quite protective over you, you know? I mean sure you had plenty of other friends, but no other best friends. Especially other male ones. I don't know that you classify him in the best friend category but I think we just saw the way you two are getting closer and got... jealous." His ears started to burn with the admission, and Hermione couldn't hold in a grin. She wouldn't tell him, but she found it rather adorable that her boys were jealous when she spent time with another boy.
"Harry Potter, do you think me so fickle with my friends?" she admonished him, though clearly playfully. "It's true, Draco and I are becoming good friends even if he is still a bit of a prat. But you and Ron have been my best friends since I was twelve years old, you were the first friends I made in the magical world. No matter how many friends I have, It'll always be us three."
Harry gave her a big grin and pulled her into a squeezing hug. "I'm glad that's settled then," he said to her, "Now what was it you wanted to talk to me about?"
"Well, it's actually about what I said in the library. To Ron, that is." She felt her stomach do flips as she steeled herself to tell him. She didn't want anymore secrets between them.
"Oh the bit where you alluded to you two shagging at a victory party this summer? Because that's really none of my business."
Hermione felt like she'd been hit in the face with a brick. How did Harry know?! Had Ron told him? What exactly had he told him? Never before had she wished more for the power to disappear, but she instead said, "YOU KNEW!?"
Harry blushed furiously and kept his eyes on the path ahead. "Erm, yeah. Don't worry, Ron didn't tell me. I sort of, I mean we... well, Ginny and I were actually looking for someplace to be alone." His whole face was scarlet now and Hermione could tell where he was going. "I may have come across you two. It was an accident, and I looked away I swear! I didn't even tell Ginny why we absolutely couldn't use the room. I've known you had feeling s for him for a while, I just thought that maybe he was finally opening his eyes. Then when it was clear you weren't together, I just thought it didn't work out."
Godric save her, it may well be possible to succumb to mortal mortification.
"You are much more observant than I've given you credit for," she sighed as she rubbed her face in exasperation. "Yes, I had feelings for him, and yes we slept together, but the next morning he made it very clear that it only happened because we'd been drinking and that it wasn't something that meant anything to him." Hermione was surprised to find that there was no hurt when she said it. Mild sting, which she assumed would always be there, but no real hurt.
Harry wrapped an arm around her and dropped a kiss to her head. "I'm sorry, Mione. I didn't know any of that. If you want me to kick his arse, I will. Best mate or no." He said it in a light tone but she could tell that he'd meant the offer. "No it's alright, Harry. I'm actually mostly past it now. I just didn't want there to be secrets between us or for you to think my not being around as much was because of you."
They'd reached the end of their walk. Harry turned to her, gave her a full hug, and said, "There's nothing you could do to make me resent you. You're one of my best friends, you don't have to explain yourself to me. I'm glad you told me though."
Hermione felt close to tears but all she said was, "Alright you great sap, no more of these heartfelt confessions. Off with you, you've apologies to make and I've a note leaver to catch." He smiled at her and waved as he went down a staircase in search of Ginny, and she turned back towards her dorms with a lighter heart than she'd had in months.
In retrospect, Draco realized that his shower time activities may not have been the best idea. It had seemed like a bloody brilliant idea at the time, and his body still felt that way, but that was the problem now wasn't it? It was bad enough that she'd nearly walked in on him, but once dressed and calmed down, he still found it hard not to think of Hermione in a new light.
He'd found her attractive for before, but now his thoughts were tempered with the heat of his fantasy. Would real Hermione arch into him when he kissed her? Would she make those lusty little sounds that had set his blood on fire? Would she return his desires at all? He was getting ahead of himself They'd barely begun to truly be friends, she couldn't possibly.
But that knowledge hadn't stopped his brain from forming the questions, and it had made being in the same room with her a bit awkward. He didn't show it of course - Malfoy's never show their discomfort - but he'd been distracted from the moment he joined the two Gryffindors on the porch. First it hd been the sight of her in her still sleep rumpled clothes. Then the way she'd so easily sided with him against Potter's brainless statement. When she'd laughed at his ban pun, he couldn't help but wink at her. And Merlin help him if she didn't flush at the light flirting.
It was normal, he rationalized. Granger is so far in her books that she'd never noticed when anyone had flirted with her, and it had happened a fair amount. He felt a bit smug that she'd responded instantly to him though. Still, it could potentially make their friendship awkward if he tried to actually make move on her.
He'd never had a friend like her, and he'd be damned if he'd bugger it up by making her uncomfortable. He'd just have to get a better grip on his control. If he couldn't, he'd just have to give up fantasy Granger.
The witch in question came back through the door then, sans green eyed git but sporting a very becoming sense of calm happiness. "Let me grab a shower and then we'll start making lists yeah?" she told him as he fought to keep his mind off of showers, "Would you get started and have the book case pull down some reference books?"
Book. Yes. He could do that.
"I suppose I could do your slave labor," he drawled. "Any particular subjects?"
The corners of her lips curled up and she told him a few categories they could start with. By a few, he meant five. One would never be able to say Hermione Granger was less than thorough.
Draco set himself to the task of finding all readily available texts on the the subjects Hermione had requested. By the time she came back, he had no less than twenty seven research materials stacked on the coffee table. "Here we have every easily accessible book relating to known Death Eaters, Voldemort sympathizers and their families, rosters of students from all houses. There are also a few ministry files on integral war personnel that we can cross reference with the enrollment rosters to see who else might be targeted, as well as Azkaban ledgers and accounts of inmates prior and current. Lastly, we have some newspapers, gossip columns, and general common drivel from people who hate you, Potter, me, or a combination of all three."
He finished listing his finds and turned to face Hermione, who was wearing a look of something akin to awe on her still steam flushed face. Her curls were still somewhat drippy and left little dark spots on her grey t-shirt, which was paired with simple muggle lounge pants. All in all, she looked very... her.
"Don't look so shocked, you forget who you're dealing with. You aren't the only one who knows how to gather information."
"No, I supposed I'm not." she said, and then smiled that soft smile again. "I'm quite impressed, Draco."
It did his ego good to have her impressed with him, and he puffed his chest out at it like a preening bird. Just a bit. "Well I'd be impressed if you didn't drip all over the common room. Haven't you ever heard of a drying spell?" he quipped in an effort to change the route of he conversation. Luckily she didn't seem to take offense to his litter barb and merely said, "Drying spells dry my hair out too much. If you think it's frizzy usually, just imagine what it'd look like devoid of any moisture."
"As you were then, can't have you bemoaning the state of your hair can we? I'll have to call you Pansy and you'll try to hit me, best to avoid it all together."
He actually got a laugh for that one, and he decided he could easily spend the days alternating between trying to pick a fight with her and trying to make her laugh.
"You are such a tosser," she said through her last chortles, "let's just get started."
"Let's"
Several hours, four arguments, one childish paper wad fight, and countless snack breaks later, they had managed quite a bit. They had compiled a list of students with family or close associate lost to the war, separate columns for those dead and those imprisoned, divided by house. No surprise which house had the lengthiest list, but there were no houses entirely absent. Just goes to show how far hate and ignorance can spread, Draco thought. They also had a list of current Hogwarts students who played a bigger role than simply fighting in the last battle. It wasn't a very long list and as such, they were able to rank the names by likelihood of being targeted. Both lists had been cross references with all available texts and double checked by one another. All in all, it had been an extremely productive evening.
At some point, they'd wound up on the same couch, familiarly close but not intruding on one another's space. It was comfortable, this companionable silence they now found themselves in. Draco knew her brain had to have been as fried as his, and she probably felt just as accomplished as he did. He broke the quiet by saying, "I'd ask what the next move is, but I think I might hex you if I'm forced to make myself think anymore than needed right now."
"Same here." she said, "I don't even want to move." Draco was going to suggest that they turn in for the night when Hermione spoke up with "Who did you lose your virginity to, Draco?"
In the dignified manner befitting his bloodline, Draco choked on his own spit and was taken by a coughing fit. Hermione patted his back until he calmed down and said, "I'm sorry, I know that was out of the blue."
"Why in seven hells would you want to know that?" he sputtered, still trying to regain his calm. They'd spoken about sex just the once in reality, and of course the fake conversation he'd had with her fantasy counterpart. Why did she want to know about his sexual past?
She just shrugged and said, "Well, there are five people besides myself who know the story of how I lost mine. Of them, I know about the first times of three. Blaise I'm not sure I want the details of, if he can even remember-"
"It was Tracey Davis in third year."
"That's not yours to tell, Drac- wait really, Tracey? I Never would've guessed. And so young... Not that there's anything wrong with it I supposed, if it's what they both wanted."
"They were both fourteen and fancied themselves in love Hermione, it was hardly some sordid tryst in an empty classroom."
"Well still, it wasn't yours to say. And you've just furthered my point in any case. You know about my first time, I'd like to know about yours." Hermione said with a confident tone that was belied by her rigid posture. Was she afraid he'd mock her for her curiosity?
He let out a deep breath and said, "Fine, If you insist. My first time was at the end of fourth year, after the last task of the Tri-Wizard tournament. Before you ask, no I wasn't in love with the girl. We'd been snogging a bit all year but nothing serious. I think we both just felt like so much was about to change, and we wanted to at least have control over this one thing. I wouldn't say it was romantic but neither of us had any expectations, and there was something very freeing about that."
"Who was it?" she asked him in a soft voice.
"I doubt you know her, she was one of the Beauxbatons girls. Lissette Dubois. You aren't the only one who was dabbling behind enemy lines, you know," Draco said to lighten the somewhat awkward moment. It worked apparently because Hermione scoffed and said, "Please, Viktor and I were hardly more than friends."
"Right, friends who felt each other up in deserted corners of the library."
That earned him a pillow to the face and an indignant snort. "I'll have you know that he was very respectful!" Draco resisted the urge to say I'll be he was, and instead settled for, "You know I doubt I ever told you this, but you looked stunning on the night of the Yule Ball. No one thought there was a luckier man than Krum to have you as his date. Even my house."
Hermione turned her head towards the table as that blush he'd come to love stole over her skin again and said, "Oh um, well thank you." She then cleared her throat to change the subject and said, "You know when you said fourth year, I'd assumed you'd say Pansy was your first."
He mock gagged and said, "Absolutely not."
"Really," Hermione asked, interest clearly piqued, "You've never slept with Pansy?"
"So interested in my wrap sheet, Hermione. One might start to think you a voyeur. But I'll tell you the entirety of my sexual exploits if you do the same. Unless, of course, you find this subject too crass for your delicate sensibilities." he taunted, clearly trying to see if she'd back down from the challenge. And sod it all, he was very interested to know who besides Weasley had captured her attentions.
She narrowed her eyes at him as if to say you're on, moistened her lips with a quick swipe of her tongue, and said, "It's a list you want? Alright then. My first kiss was a neighbor boy, a few weeks before starting Hogwarts. Then there was a weird thing with a boy in Ravenclaw during second year. We would hold hands under the table in Charms class and had exactly three kisses. Oh and he put his hand on my bum."
Draco only vaguely remembered the boy, definitely didn't remember his name, but was instantly jealous of him.
"Then there was Viktor in fourth year, of course. There was plenty of snogging and, as you so eloquently put it, 'feeling each other up in the library'. Physically, it didn't go farther than some interesting touching and a few of my blouse buttons being undone. Emotionally, there were flutters of something. He was always genuinely interested in me, without wanting to change aspects of me. It felt nice to be noticed like that.
"It didn't go anywhere obviously, even though we still write to each other. I was already falling for Ron at that point and I just couldn't fully commit to something with him. Let me think... Oh yes, there were a couple of unpleasant lip locks with Cormac McLaggen when he cornered me last year, and then of course you know all of the business with Ron- oh calm down Draco, I handled it. Trust me, he won't be kissing anyone who doesn't want it any time soon."
Draco hadn't even realized until her reassurance that his face had screwed itself up in anger. Draco Malfoy had been many things in his short life, but someone who excuses forcing yourself on someone unwilling, in any capacity, had never been him. He allowed his mind to clear to consider all that she'd told him. It was more than he'd thought. Not chaste, though not frigid either. Interesting.
"Well," he said to her after a bit of thought, "Weasley may have cocked everything up between the two of you, but I'm glad you had Krum." Something he'd never thought he'd say, as he'd been incredibly jealous of the Bulgarian prat. "You deserve to have had someone who was interested in you as a person, someone who appreciated you and like you the way you were."
She stared at him for a bit then, like he was a puzzle she was trying to work out but couldn't quite solve, before she said, "Well, let's have it then."
Ah yes, it was his turn to share.
"Where to start..." He said while he mentally tried to put everything into chronological order. "Pansy was my first kiss. We were ten, and I believe I pushed her into a mud puddle afterward."
"So you've always been an arsehole then?"
"Quite. Now shush. Next was... Well, - and if you tell anyone this, I'll obliviate you so hard you'll forget how to swallow - next it was Blaise, in our third year before he and Tracey got together. He thought he might be interested in blokes as well as girls, and I'll admit that I was curious myself. We didn't shag, but it went farther than kissing.
"For him it stuck, but even though I don't regret what happened, it wasn't something I wanted to do again." He'd never told anyone that. He didn't even think of it much since he and Blaise had grown farther apart the more Draco got pulled into all of Voldemort's nonsense.
He wasn't ashamed of it, and he'd curse anyone who thought to belittle Blaise for his preferences, but he'd never trusted anyone enough to give them that kind of information. Ironic that a girl he'd once tormented would be the person he felt comfortable divulging his innermost secrets to.
Draco glanced at her, prepared to see mockery or even disgust, but he should've known by now not to expect to know how shed react. Her face was indeed colored by a bit of surprise, but more than anything there was understanding and that ever present curiosity.
How strange. How very Gryffindor. There were no cogs turning behind her eyes trying to spin the information for her own gain, no plots of blackmail forming. Just trust and understanding. Companionship.
Shaking his head, he continued with, "Well, then it was Lissette for most all of fourth year. Though she wasn't my first, Pansy and I did spend a lot of fifth year in intimate contact. I wasn't interested in her romantically, I was using the sex as a way to forget about all of the shite going on back at the manor. But she called herself my girlfriend and I allowed it because who was I to deny her the title if we were spending all of our spare time together anyway? In any event, I broke it all off with her that summer, when everything started changing.
"And all that's left is... a few witches this past summer in manners not unlike the one you and the Ginger Git found yourselves in. I was just so bloody happy to be alive, and for the first time in my life there were people of good repute looking at me like I was worth something. I'd be lying if I said it didn't feel good to be painted in that kind of light, or that I didn't take advantage of the better perks of my newfound good name."
He'd taken to staring at the ceiling for the last bit of his story, unwilling to look at Hermione as he spilled his sordid past. Draco doubted she'd be one to judge him for it, but was unwilling to take the risk of it all the same.
"And you were... attentive to the pleasure of all of your past lovers?"
Fuck me sideways, how many times can one person catch me off guard in a single conversation?
"Y-yes, of course. It likely wasn't always mind blowing, but I always made sure to see to their needs before mine. If there's one good thing my father taught me its that A Malfoy Man never leaves a woman anything less than satisfied, and to do so is dishonorable."
"Hmm..." she said, as she worried her bottom lip and considered his words. "I think I rather agree on that."
Draco just stared as she stretched and rose from the couch. She started to roll their lists and put the texts away as she said. "The next time I take a lover, I fully intend to take your advice to heart. No one that isn't as dedicated to my pleasure as I am to theirs will ever get into my knickers again."
She then turned to him as though she hadn't blown his mind, yawned, and said, "Goodnight, Draco" in a sleep husked voice.
He stayed where he was a bit longer, replaying everything they'd just talked about and doubting that his will to remained controlled around the brunette would hold out. Especially if she insisted on having conversations like these. He wondered if he really wanted it to.
A/N: Hey guys! I had planned to put this up yesterday in honor of Harry's birthday, but alas it was not meant to be. Somehow I managed to erase almost 3000 words and by the time I finished crying and rewriting, It was already today. There may be some spelling/grammar errors, as I've only been able to give this a quick once over. I have a lot to get done and if I don't post it now, I won't be able to for the next few days, so I apologize in advance! Oh and always, much love and many thanks to pgoodrichboggs and riaroo400 for their steadfast reviewing! Hope you've enjoyed this chapter, please let me know!