Chapter Eleven

The next few weeks flew by like blurred ink on a page as Claire continued to work at the pub and care for the boys and Margaret. Every night when she went to bed she was dead on her feet, but it was all a great distraction from the growing void between her and Thomas. She had an argument with Aiden over them joining the Shelby gang, but Claire knew it would be happening before they even made it back to Small Heath. Truthfully, it was the best move for them, but she worried about their safety and she was scared for herself as well.

Even though time had gone by so quickly, there were many events that were exciting and sad. A member of the Peaky Blinder's, Danny Whiz-bang, who suffered terribly from the after effects of the war had been killed though Aiden later told her after the funeral that he was actually safe and sound in London. Thomas had made it look like a real death to appease the Italians, but sent him to the big city for business purposes. What business that was Claire wasn't sure.

She had also learned of Thomas's time in the war serving as a Sergeant Major and taking on the task of digging tunnels underground so that he may conduct sneak attacks on the enemy in order to keep as many civilians safe as possible. It was a task that made Claire shutter. What it must have been like down in those dark, damp tunnels…She didn't want to think about him down there.

There had also been a wedding for the second youngest Shelby man to a member of the Lee family which was peculiar to her since she always remembered the Shelby's and the Lee's being in a feud half the time. Nevertheless, it was a grand party. She had spoken to John to congratulate him even though it seemed he was less than excited about the arrangement beforehand. His attitude changed when he saw his bride who was rather pretty, she admitted. With her long dark gypsy hair not very unlike Claire's, it was braided in several strands while the rest hung loosely under her veil. She was a tiny thing, barely coming to Claire's shoulders, but made up for it by her feisty personality. Claire liked her instantly. Even though it had been a betrothal, they seemed happy enough as we all danced the night away. The drinks ran freely and she even saw Thomas smile and laugh, something she hadn't seen since she had left as he had not done it at all since she had come back. In her tipsy state of mind, she had wanted to go and dance with him like they used to do, but Keagan had made sure she didn't make a fool of herself. She thanked him the next morning as she wasn't sure if she could have withstood the rejection she would have surely gotten.

But today. Today she was steaming mad with Thomas. The twins had been talking about some business with the Blinder's that had happened a few days before they had officially joined that morning while eating breakfast, not aware that she was still home. Apparently, Thomas and his men had infiltrated a crate of guns bound for Libya from the English government and were planning on using them as bartering tools against the rightful owners and the IRA.

The IRA had been a very large part of the reason why her family had left their home in Wexford to begin with. They had threatened them and made them go into hiding until they could afford to take off and join the local gypsy caravans. They had had to start a whole new life. He couldn't believe her brothers were supporting the decision to barter arms with them, let alone the danger they were putting themselves and the rest of their family in by messing with the very government that had made them leave their home here 15 years ago.

She was in a right mind to give Thomas a piece of hers which is exactly what she planned to do as she marched her way down to the Shelby household. Claire banged on the door and set her hands on her hips as she waited for someone to answer. When Finn did she barked, "Is your oaf of a brother home?"

Finn raised an eyebrow and said, "Which one?"

Claire couldn't help but smile at that. Yes, they were all oafs, weren't they, she thought to herself. "The second one," she answered.

"He's in his room," little Finn answered. Claire stormed past him and practically ran up the stairs. Without ceremony, she pushed open the door and the smell of opium hit her nostrils. Her anger faltered slightly as she realized just how badly the war must have affected Thomas if he had succumbed to the use of opiates. However, it rose once again when she saw the same usual arrogant smirk on his face as he sat on the end of his bed smoking a cigarette. He hadn't even jumped at her entrance as if he had been expecting her to barge in at any moment. The fact she couldn't rile him just made her angrier.

"How stupid can you possibly be?" she yelled.

Thomas merrily looked at her as he took another drag from his cigarette. "I can be very stupid if need be, but I haven't made a habit out of it," he answered sarcastically.

Claire fumed at his causal remark. "You're bartering guns with the IRA?!"

At this, Claire earned a pair of raised eyebrows. He put out his cigarette. "You're asking ridiculous questions you have no business asking?" he asked calmly back.

"No business asking?! You're putting my family in danger, Thomas! We just got back and you're already trying to make us have to leave again. I know you hate me, but could you really hate me that much?" she said using her hands to emphasize the hurt she was feeling.

Thomas stood up, using his height to try and intimidate her into submission. It wasn't going to work. "This deal started before your family joined and they were well aware of what was going on when they decided or did you not hear that from listening at the vent?"

She blushed at the reference to her eves dropping, but was still furious with him. "Knowing you, you twisted it into such a way that sounded grand when it's really going to get us all killed!"

"It doesn't surprise me that you don't trust me to handle it since you could never trust me with anything. You can't even tell me why you fucking left without so much as a word or a goodbye! We were in love, Claire! So, tell me why should I give you a reason for why I am doing what I am doing with anything?"

Claire snapped her mouth shut letting the hurt of his words flow over her. She was done fighting now as she knew Thomas would just start in on her for old pains and she couldn't give him the real reason why. She turned to leave, but Thomas grabbed her arm and spat his next hateful vile at her, "You're trying to leave again? Are you joking?" Claire just turned her face from his. Thomas let go of her. "Is it because you don't want to tell me how you spread your legs in every damn country you visited or that you're ashamed you ever fucked me?"

Claire felt the sting in her hand before she even realized she had slapped Thomas across the face. Looking into his eyes, she saw the surprise there and fled from the room.

If he could even think for a second that she was a whore, she knew he didn't know her at all and if he could think that what they had done was 'fucking' then she knew he never loved her to begin with.