Always darkest before the dawn
Sadly I do not own Sands, nor do I have him chained up safely in my cellar… mores the pity.
(chpt 10 "Don't beat yourself up over it" she said softly as she read his expression. "It was only a kiss" she said dismissively. She almost even managed to convince herself of it.
"No you were meant to beat me up over it" Sands quipped.. Sara sighed, though not a totally exasperated one, Sands knew the difference, he had heard totally exasperated often enough to tell
"So you confess your less than cunning plan.. I am sure I never read a chapter on that strategy of defeating your enemy in Sun Tzu's 'The Art of War' " she said
"You assume I have read it , so you let me know you have, or imply it, to impress?" Sands said with a smile "And I guess I am meant here to say you are not the enemy… but then that assumes I am sure your not" he said
"It must get busy in there; all those circular thoughts and arguments" Sara countered
as she touched his temple " I am not the enemy .. yet. Though I am sure you are confident you can turn me into one if you tried, but what advantage would that really give you?" she asked
"Well if that was a serious question, I might give you a serious answer" Sands countered
"Might?" Sara jumped on the word
"You think anything is certain with me" he said with an almost self satisfied smirk, that was pitched at that level to irritate
"I'd say not seeing was" Sara snapped, immediately wishing she could bite back how vicious those words sounded when spoken. Whatever reaction she was expecting it was not the satisfied smile that slowly crossed his lips, she wondered just how insanely twisted this man truly was
"More than you'll ever know" he replied, as if reading her thoughts, "But you lil Missy were dangling some mythical carrot of just the slightest hope I might see in some sense again, so which lie do you want me to bite?" he said coldly. It was a level of cold she had never encountered and she shivered in response
"They tell me there is hope of some form of sight, but.. " her voice faded.
"Isn't there always a but… life's a bitch, that way.. but you do nothing if not attempt to take the sting out of them, sugar coat those buts, guess that's what your sort do" he said "Sugarbut" he added purely for his own amusement; Sugarbutt had set him up for being blinded Sugarbut laid the sweet bait he might just see again; if he played nice. But then again he was Sheldon Jeffrey Sands, how nice could the likes of him ever play. Especially when he was mentally kicking himself for letting himself believe her soft sugar-coated words when he first arrived in hospital and she whispered comforts to him. That someone had to pay for
"Sands" she said exasperatedly "you think your going to get away with changing the subject like that, very well done though" she said
"What subject was that Sugar.. but?" he teased
"Those dreams, the blinding" she said
"Ok.. you wanna play so bad?" he said with noticeable venom "You want in here?" he taped his temple "Well be sure what you wish for Sugar.. you better fasten your seatbelts its gonna be a bumpy night" he said
"Ride"
"What?"
"The quote.. it's from All about Eve.. it's 'its going to be a bumpy ride"
"No its not' popular misconception, she says night, and Bogart never said 'Play it again Sam, and Hamlet never said "Alas poor Warwick I knew him well' They are all misquotes, in my line of work it takes someone who knows the difference between what people think they know and the truth" he pointed out
She sighed "I am not going to argue with you on Movie quotes" she snapped
"Movie and play quotes.. Shakespeare was a tad before the invention of Cinema" he said smugly
"You know suddenly the torture seems less inexplicable, you love to push people to their limits… even friends" she replied in irritated tones
"You think you're a friend?" he said swiftly said, ignoring the torture reference
"I am not an enemy" she pointed out
"That we are yet to see" he said with a kind of relish, well if he was damned uncomfortable about the blinding, if anyone was going to disprove the lie that a trouble shared was a trouble halved, he was here and now.
"So are you going to tell me? You know, about the dreams?" she asked with a tone of strained patience
"Depends what you ask" he said
"Do you remember the blinding?" she asked
"In the dream.. or in general?" he asked, say you're a pedant you have to play out the role of pedant
"Both" she muttered
"Well that's clearer, so clear even a blind man can see it" he chuckled to himself. "And in answer 'Both'" he said
"You remember it?" she let slip.
"I just said so , didn't I .. or is there something wrong with your ears?" he asked
"No, nothing wrong with them, its just the doctors said, you wouldn't"
"You know Sugarplum I have learned to be a mite mistrustful of Doctors these days" he pointed out "you might do well to do the same" he added
"I am a doctor" she said tersely
"Oh yeah.. so you are" he said with a curl of a smile across his lips, displaying the lie his tone of voice told, that he had just forgotten this little fact
"You know, you are impossible Agent Sands" she stated
"No.. just improbable, if I were impossible I wouldn't be here for you to be sitting on the same bed as"
"You know that's not how I meant it" she said. She tilted her head and looked at him carefully. Could his mood be this tense because she was sat on the bed with him, stroking his arm still, had he changed from lost to aggressive in tone, to deflect her offer of comfort and its dangers, she wondered.
"You psychoanalysing me there a mite Sugarkins?" he said, in response to the silence
"Yes, its my job, and I swear they are not paying me enough" she replied "how much detail do you remember?" she more tentatively asked
"Oh.. I remember Ajedrez… the needle in the neck, then waking up to Dr Guevara's tender care, his drill, its bite, the blood and darkness, how much detail are you wanting?" he said with an abnormal calm.
"What did you do next?" she asked
"Extract revenge" he said calmly
"Is that what kept you going that day?" she said
"No.. I don't think it was" he said rolling a cigarette and lighting it "It was… more not knowing how to lie down and die, to just give up.. its just not in me Sugarplum" he said.. he tilted his head in his direction "Is that what your bosses are wanting to hear?" he said
"I guess it is" she said. Looking over at him as he exhaled blue grey smoke
"well I guess you got what you wanted" he said, his tone business like, as if all the talk before was an act he did to get an end result he wanted, and for all she knew it was. But that was not all that had happened, her gut told her that
"No, not yet. I will let you know when I do" she replied
"Oh I can hardly wait.. baited breath and all that" he said with a deceptively soft seductive tone, on anyone else it would seem innocently pleasant, on him it seemed a threat that sent shivers down her spine
Sands felt for the ashtray by his bed, and lay down "Fun as this all this is.. I got things to do in the morning, so if you can restrain yourself a moment , Doll, from keeping me up all night" he teased.. he smiled to himself as he heard another frustrated sigh, he wondered if he, just for his own personal amusement set himself a challenge of sigh quota's for each day, Christ knows he could do little else, he might have not had it in him to lay down and die the day of the dead, but how could he do his thing blind, he was not going to ever have the life he wanted ever again.. and for that someone had to pay, and he didn't quite mind if the ultimate price was paid by him.