Beca adjusts Alex slightly in her arms, a smile playing across her face as she watches her son take down his bottle with gusto. Jack was curled up in the bed next to her, having woken up a little bit ago, but was content to watch cartoons for the time being, as he clearly wasn't fully awake yet. Beca was a little surprised that Chloe hadn't yet returned from the gym, but for now was content to spend some time with her little guys snuggled up in bed. The upcoming tour is constantly in the back of her mind, and she tries not to think about leaving her kids and wife behind for a few months. Leaving Chloe and Jack behind for her last tour was the hardest thing Beca had ever done, and she knows its going to be even harder now with Alex in the mix. She really needed to talk to Chloe about this, and soon.
Running her hand gently though Jack's hair to get his attention, she laughs when her stomach growls loudly.
"Mom!" Jack giggles and turns so that he is looking at Beca with a surprised expression. "Was that your tummy?" He rolls toward her and gives it a poke.
Beca laughs, squirming when Jack pokes her again. "Okay dude, that's enough, I'm trying to feed your brother." Jack settles against her and rests his head against her shoulder. "I guess I'm a little hungry. Mama will be back any minute and then we can go for breakfast."
Jack nods against her. "Can I have pancakes today?" He reaches out and gently rubs his fingers along his little brother's head, a move that never fails to make Beca melt. He was such a good big brother to Alex.
"Ooooh, yeah, pancakes sound great." Beca replies, looking at the clock on the bedside table again with a frown. "You know pancakes are my favorite." Alex finishes his bottle and Beca lifts him to her shoulder to coax a burp out of him.
"Me too. Mama makes yummy ones."
Beca is about to reply when she hears the door to the other room open and close and can't help the smile that breaks out on her face when her wife appears in the doorway to their room. Chloe's face is flushed from her time in the gym, but Beca loves the sight of her wife with a messy bun in running shorts and a workout tank. It reminds her of the many hours of Bella practices over the years and stealing secret glances at her beautiful redhead.
Chloe doesn't enter the room fully, instead leaning against the doorframe and taking in the sight of her family snuggled up in the large bed. It tugs at her heart, but when her eyes settle on her wife she can't help but immediately be upset at the idea of Beca leaving to go on tour.
"Mama! We're so hungry!" Jack slides off the bed and runs to his mother, running directly into Chloe's legs and wrapping his arms around them. "I need pancakes!"
Chloe smiles, leaning down to smooth down Jack's bedhead before kissing the top of his head. "Oh, you need them, huh?"
Jack looks up at her, looking very serious about the prospective pancakes. "Yes." He nods emphatically, pointing back toward his brunette mother. "Mom's tummy needs them too, it's making noises."
Chloe laughs and presses another kiss to Jack's head. "Okay then. Mama needs a quick shower and then we'll go get breakfast." She gives him a gentle pat on the butt. "Go pick out some clothes and mom will help you get dressed."
Jack disappears into the other room to grab some clothes, and Chloe enters the room fully to give Alex a good morning kiss. She deposits her phone, headphones, and iPad on the bed next to Beca before holding out her arms to receive the baby.
"How was your workout with Aubrey?" Beca passes Alex to her wife. "Is she as much of a sadist as she used to be?"
Chloe accepts the baby with a smile and snuggles the happy baby against her for a few seconds. "It was fine." She kisses his chubby cheek then hands him back to Beca, who is sitting cross-legged on their bed. "I need to shower." She enters the bathroom, closing the door behind her swiftly.
Beca is slightly put off by Chloe's curt response, but assumes it is due to an intense workout. Brushing it off, she slides out of the bed and starts to get her kids ready for the day. Aubrey had planned a jam-packed itinerary, but Beca hoped she would be able to make some time to talk to Chloe about the tour.
"Oh god…how much farther?" Fat Amy pants, stopping to bend over slightly, placing her hands on her knees and breathing heavily.
Beca rolls her eyes but stops to keep her friend company as she rests. "Ames, my four-year-old is actually skipping along the trail. Take the drama down a notch." Beca looks up to where Jack has just caught up with Chloe and Aubrey at the front of the group.
The group of Bellas is taking a gentle hike through the lush Hawaiian jungle on a tour led by a few of the resort staff. This wasn't typically Beca's idea of a good time but spending time with her closest friends on the way to a waterfall for some swimming has surprisingly been enjoyable thus far. Minus Amy's constant griping about the less-than-strenuous physical activity.
"Shake it off Amy." Beca gives her friend a sympathetic pat on the back. "Also, I'd like to point out that my tiny ass has a baby strapped to my chest and I'm not bitching nearly as much as you." She gestures toward the front of the group. "Come on…I think we're almost there. It looks like there's a big clearing up ahead."
Amy straightens up, red-faced, and sucks in a few big breaths. "My sexy fat ass isn't used to physical exertion." She fixes the sweatband around her head and starts stumbling down the trail after the rest of the group. "The altitude here is making it hard to breathe."
"Amy we are literally at sea level." Beca peers down to make sure Alex is still fine in the carrier strapped to her chest and follows after Fat Amy. "At least there's no bear traps out here."
A few minutes later the duo has caught up with the rest of the Bellas, and the group is setting their backpacks down as they take in the beautiful views of the waterfall that is spilling into a small lake in the middle of the jungle. As much as Beca wants to hate Aubrey for making her trek through the jungle, this is actually pretty cool. She looks around to see where her wife and son have gotten off to and is not surprised to see Jack stripping off his t-shirt and walking toward the edge of the water. Beca moves to join them, her eyes raking up Chloe's legs and appreciating how short her wife's running shorts are. Just before Beca joins her wife and son, she is stopped by Emily.
"Can I take Alex for a bit?" The younger woman holds out her arms, bouncing excitedly as she waits for an answer. "I need my baby fix for the day."
Beca grins, her soft spot for the youngest Bella evident as she can't help but grin at Emily's enthusiasm for everything.
"Yeah, sure Legacy." Beca unsnaps one side of the carrier and lets Emily pluck Alex from his spot nestled against her chest. "We discovered he loves the water yesterday, so feel free to let him splash a bit if you want. It's pretty cute."
Emily holds the baby protectively against her with a wide smile on her face. "O-M-G, he is absolutely the cutest Beca!" She giggles when Alex smiles at her. "He looks just like you. It's kind of freaky."
"Well, he is my kid Em. It'd be freakier if he didn't." Beca finishes taking off the backpack and drops it on a nearby rock. She smooths down Alex's downy hair that is sticking straight up. "Okay bud, have fun spending time with Auntie Em." She gives Emily a reassuring smile. "Bring him back if he gets fussy."
Emily nods excitedly and walks off to where Cynthia-Rose, Amy, and Flo are sitting down. Beca smiles when she hears the group cooing collectively at Alex in greeting and turns to continue toward Chloe and Jack. Stacie is already in the water with Bella, and Jack is splashing in the shallows a few feet from Chloe.
"Hey." Beca wraps an arm around Chloe's waist. "Have a good hike?"
Chloe nods, turning to smile briefly at Beca. "This place is beautiful." Her gaze returns to keeping an eye on Jack. "How did Alex do?"
"Totally fine. Amy was a way bigger baby than our four-month-old. I contemplated just leaving her behind at a couple points."
Chloe giggles, looking over to where their Australian friend was now floating happily in the water. As ridiculous as Fat Amy was, Chloe couldn't help but laugh at her constant antics. Glancing around at the rest of the group, spread out in groups of two or three, Chloe's heart felt full knowing that she was surrounded by her closest friends and family. The only thing putting a damper on her day was the looming topic of Beca's upcoming tour.
Sighing quietly, Chloe decides that now is as good of a time as any to bring it up. Linking her hand with Beca's, she looks at Beca nervously.
"Come sit with me?" Chloe tugs gently and looking around, finds an area of rocks overlooking the shallow water several feet away from where Jack was playing.
"Definitely." Beca replies with a grin, easily following her wife's lead as they go a short distance away, eventually settling side by side on the sun-warmed rocks. Tilting her head up so the sun hits her face, Beca slides her sunglasses down over her eyes and sighs happily. "This definitely beats spending eighteen hours a day in the studio."
Beca can feel Chloe stiffen beside her, and immediately feels bad about her flippant comment. The long hours she had been spending at work had become a sore subject lately, and Beca wasn't sure how to address it. Even though she loves her job, the long days and nights lately had been taking a toll on her family life for sure.
It's quiet for a few moments, the only sounds are the rush of the waterfall and the various conversations coming from the other Bellas.
"When were you going to tell me that you were going back on tour?" Chloe asks quietly, unable to keep her silence about it anymore. Maybe this wasn't the time or place to figure out the details, but she wanted to know what Beca was thinking. "I saw the email…by mistake. On your iPad."
"Chlo." Beca sighs, turning slightly so she can look at Chloe's face. "I was going to tell you, I swear. I literally just found out about it yesterday." She hangs her head, rubbing nervously at the back of her neck. Reaching out, she attempts to grab Chloe's hand, cringing internally when Chloe pulls away.
"So, what does this mean Beca? The label just tells you to go and you just leave your family for four months?" Chloe can feel her anger and helplessness about the situation rising quickly.
"Come on Chloe, you know that's not how it works." Beca groans. "If it were up to me I'd tell the label to go fuck themselves. But it's in my contract and I can't opt out. Trust me, I already asked." She rubs a hand down her face in frustration. "It's been over three years since I last toured, I've actually been lucky to go that long without touring."
Chloe fiddles with her wedding rings, twisting them around her finger distractedly as she tries to compose her thoughts. "Yes…lucky for us that instead of touring you've been spending almost every waking hour at the studio."
As soon as the words are out of her mouth, Chloe immediately regrets the tone with which she said them. She can physically feel Beca reacting, stiffening up as she processes what Chloe just said.
"It's my job Chlo!" Beca's voice has begun to rise, and she looks around nervously, hoping that the rest of the women aren't listening in to the conversation. "God…I can't believe you right now." She leans back and takes a few breaths to steady herself. "I'm sorry things have been crazy, but all of this is out of my hands. And it really fucking sucks. The last time I went on tour was hard enough on you and Jack. And now we have Alex. I feel absolutely shitty that I have to leave you guys again."
Chloe drops her head, remembering the last time Beca had gone on tour.
Chloe is finishing up putting away her leftovers from the takeout she had ordered for dinner. Glancing over her shoulder quickly, she makes sure that Jack hasn't escaped from where she had left him a few minutes ago. Satisfied that the thirteen-month-old was safely within the confines of the living room still, Chloe stacks up the containers of food and transfers them into the fridge. Wiping her hands on a towel, she picks up her phone from the counter, checking quickly to see if she has any texts from Beca. Disappointed to see there aren't any texts, Chloe heads into the living room, joining Jack on the floor to play for a few minutes before starting his bedtime routine.
Beca had been on tour for a little over a month so far and the separation had been hard for both women. Beca had been trying to call or video chat every couple of days, but Chloe was definitely feeling the physical absence even harder than Beca's first tour when she was pregnant. She and Beca had been a couple for a little over six months when Beca left for the first tour stop in Houston, and Chloe had underestimated how hard it would be to be separated from her girlfriend. She knew that Beca was having fun performing night after night, but Beca had recently verbalized just how hard it was for her to be away from Chloe and Jack, and that made Chloe feel much worse. Being alone with Jack every day made Chloe extremely thankful for Beca as a partner, and she was counting the days until Beca would be home again and they could return to their regular life.
Jack picks up one of his cars and clumsily stands up and toddles over to Chloe, who holds her arms out to break his fall should he stumble. He had only recently figured out this walking thing, conveniently waiting until a week after Beca had left to really get the hang of walking.
"Careful Jack." Chloe giggles as Jack grins as he toddles the last couple steps into her arms. "Hi sweet boy!" Kissing his temple, Chloe settles him in her lap, scooting back slightly so that her back is resting against the bottom of the couch. Chloe is just about to reach for one of the toy cars nearby when her phone buzzes from where it is resting on the floor. When she realizes who is calling, a smile appears on her face and she quickly accepts the FaceTime request, holding the phone out in front of her.
"Hey Chlo!" Beca's face appears on the screen. It's dark wherever she is, and Chloe assumes she's in her bunk on the tour bus as Beca has her headphones in her ears.
Chloe adjusts the phone so it is angled to where Beca can see both her and Jack in the picture. "Hi babe! I was just about to get Jack ready for bed. Say hi Jack." Chloe points at her phone, her smile growing wider when Jack notices Beca on the screen and shrieks happily.
"Hey dude!" Beca's image is hard to make out, but Chloe can't mistake the goofy grin on her girlfriend's face as she waves in greeting at Jack.
Chloe settles Jack against her, noticing he is rubbing his eyes. Sighing as she knows she is probably going to have to cut the FaceTime session short to put him to bed, Chloe focuses back on Beca.
"We miss you babe." Chloe says with a sad smile.
Beca adjusts herself in her bunk with a sigh. "I miss you too. So much."
"What city are you in tonight?"
Beca props herself up on her elbow. "Boston. The show just finished. The bus is about to head out. I can't wait to get some sleep. The crowd was insane tonight but I'm exhausted."
Chloe nods, feeling Jack nuzzling his face sleepily into her shirt. "Are you having fun? Is it like the last tour?"
"Yeah. Sort of, I guess." Beca pauses for a moment before shrugging. "It's different this time because I have you guys now." She looks away from the camera for a minute. "I have a family now."
Chloe's heart flutters, feeling emotional at Beca's response. She smiles lovingly in reply, hoping that even through the crappy FaceTime connection, Beca can see just how much Chloe loves her.
"Your family can't wait until you get home." Chloe replies quietly. "Your girlfriend especially can't wait to kiss you again."
Beca's head drops back to her pillow with a quiet groan. "I miss your kisses the most I'm pretty sure."
"Not sex?" Chloe asks, winking playfully at Beca, knowing it will get the desired response.
"Oh, come on…that's not even a fair question Chlo!" Beca splutters, her eyes shutting tightly as she tries to not think about the night before she left for tour, where Chloe and Beca had spent several hours making memories in their bed for Beca to have while she was gone. She opens her eyes again, resting her head back against her pillow as she studies the image on the screen for several seconds. "God Chloe…even on FaceTime you're absolutely gorgeous."
Smiling wistfully, Chloe feels the full weight of their few-thousand-mile separation. "I love you Beca." Touching her fingers to her lips, she brings them up toward the camera, sending a virtual kiss to the woman on the other side of the country. Although Chloe loved to be able to communicate like this with Beca as much as possible, their conversations tended to quickly turn into the two women talking about how much they missed each other.
"I love you too." Beca replies quietly. "Only seventy-seven more days."
Chloe looks down and sees that Jack has fallen asleep. She sighs, knowing she needs to end the call and put him down for the night.
"Becs, I've got to hang up in a minute. I need to put Jack to bed."
Beca nods, able to see that Jack is fast asleep in Chloe's arms. "Yeah...I can see that. He's passed out." She can't help but feel a bit left out as the baby is cuddled snugly against Chloe's body.
Chloe bites her lip. "Hey babe?"
"Yeah?" Beca is yawning as she settles more comfortably the narrow space that is her bunk.
"One of these days I'm gonna marry you. And we'll have so many kids you won't be able to take off on tour anymore." Chloe grins at the thought of having more babies with Beca. "So, you better tell your manager that this is your last tour for a while."
Beca chuckles at Chloe's bold statement. Marrying Chloe was absolutely on the agenda in the near future. "Yeah, I don't think me having a bigger family is going to stop the label execs from making me tour. But…let's talk more about the marriage thing in seventy-seven days." Beca replies with a shy smile.
Chloe's heart flutters at Beca's sincere response. "Yeah?"
"Absolutely."
Chloe feels tears prickling in her eyes and attempts to blink them away quickly. But they're absolutely the best kind of tears, and Chloe can't help feeling as though she just fell more deeply in love with Beca Mitchell.
"I love you."
"Right back at ya Beale." Beca looks quickly to her left to make sure no one can see her, then blows a kiss to Chloe. She knows it's kind of lame, but she can't help the way she acts when Chloe is involved, and the smile that appears on her girlfriend's face makes it totally worth it. "Give Jack a big kiss for me. I'll try and call you guys tomorrow, okay?"
Chloe brushes a tear away and nods. "Sounds good. Get some sleep Becs." With a gentle kiss to Jack's temple, she gives a tiny wave toward the camera. "Love you."
Beca waves in return. "Night."
The call ends and Chloe continues to stare at the screen, wishing that Beca's face would appear again. With a gentle sigh, Chloe puts the phone down beside her, pulling Jack against her and cuddling with her son for a few peaceful moments. In her mind, she knows that this separation is temporary, but with every fiber of her being, Chloe wishes the time passes quickly so that Beca will be back in her arms too.
"Chlo. Look at me." Beca's hand reaches out and gently rests on Chloe's thigh. Chloe stares at the water for a few seconds and then slowly raises her gaze to meet Beca's. "I know you're thinking about last time. Right?" She squeezes gently, and Chloe can see apprehension in her eyes.
Chloe nods, the lump in her throat making it difficult to form words.
Beca exhales slowly, scooting closer so she can wrap her arms around her wife, somewhat surprised when Chloe slumps into the embrace, wrapping her arms around Beca in response, her hands clutching at the back of Beca's t-shirt.
"Leaving you guys last time was probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I love you and our family so much Chloe. You and the boys make me so happy." Beca drops her head slightly to kiss the bare skin of Chloe's shoulder. "I promise I will talk to Charlie. If I have to go on tour again I'm going to do it on our terms." Trailing her fingers along Chloe's back she pulls back from the embrace, her eyes searching Chloe's face. "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you right away. I got the email and freaked out and I didn't know how to bring it up."
It seems like a million thoughts are racing through Chloe's head. All she can think about are all the logistical details that go along with being a single parent to two young children for a few months.
"This really sucks Beca." Chloe says quietly, tucking her head back against Beca's neck.
"I know. It really does. It's fucking horrible timing. Just promise me that you'll tell me what you need, okay? If we can figure out a way to make this any less horrible for you, then we need to tell Charlie."
Chloe nods against Beca, exhaling a shaky breath as she does. Her eyes close for a few seconds as she feels Beca's lips against her temple. Her eyes open again when she hears Stacie calling them over and she releases her grip on Beca to turn toward where Stacie's voice was coming from.
"Paging Chloe Mitchell! Stop making out with your wife! Your presence is requested for a rematch of the epic grudge match of 2014."
Stacie is in the water, about chest deep, with Jessica and Ashley. Jessica is perched on Ashley's shoulders and both of them have their game faces on, beckoning Chloe toward the water.
"We're gonna kick your ass again!" Ashley taunts, a grin on her face.
Chloe forces a smile, not really feeling like joining her friends after the emotional conversation with Beca but knows she can't ignore the rest of the group for much longer. Giving Beca a quick squeeze on the shoulder, she pulls out of the embrace with a quick apology.
"Go." Beca forces a smile in reply. "We'll finish this conversation later, I promise."
Nodding, Chloe stands and helps Beca up before peeling off her tank top so she's in her sports bra and shorts. Kicking off her shoes and socks, she heads toward the water, slowly wading over to where her friends were waiting for her.
Beca heads over to where the rest of the Bellas have gathered to watch, a smirk appearing as she watches Stacie disappear under the water as Chloe settles on her shoulders. Jack steps out of the water and joins his mom, wrapping his arms around Beca's legs.
"What's mama doing?"
"It's called a chicken fight." Beca squats down so she is at Jack's level. "And your mom is about to get her ass kicked." She can't hide her amusement as Jessica and Chloe lock arms and start to push and pull at each other.
Jack giggles, and watches as a few seconds later his mama is toppling into the water with a playful shout.
"I told you." Beca chuckles as her wife resurfaces with a genuine grin and laughing despite her loss. "Mama and Auntie Stacie think they're good at this game."
Stacie is calling out about best two out of three, and the four women set up again for another battle.
"Mama's silly." Jack whispers conspiratorially to the woman beside him.
"Yeah buddy. She really is." Beca replies, giving her son a tickle. "But we love her anyway."