BPOV
"God, I don't know what his deal is lately. Since I got back from my visiting home he has been all 'babe,' 'sweetie', 'darling'. I hate the couplely nicknames, I have never been called one that doesn't nauseate me."
Today I was sitting across from my friend Maggie at an outside patio of a cute little French bistro, enjoying my lunch break. She ran the day care at the record company and we became fast friends when I had been forced to keep Nessie there in the early years.
"Oh I don't know, some are kind of nice," I replied.
"Name one."
"Sunshine," I said, surprised to hear the wistful tone in my voice.
"Ok fine, that isn't bad. It is kinda nice that Jake calls you sunshine."
"What? No. Jake is all about the babes and the sweeties," I shuddered, cursing myself for once again forgetting about my boyfriend.
"So an ex then? This sounds like a story." Maggie leaned back in her chair and looked at me expectantly.
The appearance of a blond goddess saved me from tackling that conversation. Rosalie stalked across the patio like it was a catwalk, late as usual. Maggie and Rose had met through my daughter as well. Rose was a godsend in those first few, incredibly hard years. She was always picking Nessie up form daycare and watching her after class. Maggie and Rose bonded over their no nonsense attitudes. Hanging out with the two of them was always an experience.
"Yea, I know, I know. I am late, deal with it." Rose cut off my snide comment with her hand as she sat in between Maggie and me. "So what's good here?"
Ordering and eating distracted Maggie from her question, thankfully. I didn't want Maggie to know about Edward. She was one of my few friends that didn't know me back then, when I was a different Bella. Alice and Rose and Emmett and Jasper and even Angela all treated me different after the break up. Either with pity or anger or frustration or concern. I liked that Maggie didn't, she just saw me as Bella, not damaged goods.
We were just finishing up lunch when the waiter came out, placing a bottle of PBR and a chilled glass in front of me.
"From the gentlemen," he said as he gestured behind me.
I nodded in thanks and closed my eyes, knowing exactly who would send me such a ridiculous drink.
"What the hell?" Maggie asked, examining the bottle of cheap beer and looking over my shoulder. I still hadn't turned around but I could feel his eyes on the back of my head, heating my whole body. "I can't believe they even serve this here."
Rosalie made eye contact with him and her eyes flashed to me in concern.
"Bella, are you ok?" she asked.
I nodded again, still unable to speak. He had really caught me off guard with this one.
"Holy shit, is that Edward Cullen?" Maggie squeaked. "Rose, he plays with your boyfriend right? You know him don't you?"
"Not as well as Bella," she said in a low voice, crossing her arms over her chest and glaring at Edward.
"You are friends with Edward Cullen, Bella? How did I not know this? Can you introduce us? Is he single? God he is hot."
Rose snorted and continued to glare.
"I wouldn't really call us friends." My friend's expression of interest left me feeling ill, jealous and territorial.
"Listen Bella, Alice told me about Edward giving you all sorts of crap lately. I don't like it, in fact I am going to go let him know right now."
"Rose," I said, placing a hand on her arm as she started to rise. "It is ok. I appreciate this whole mama bear thing but I am fine. I'll go talk to him."
Maggie was looking at me like I was speaking Swahili. I let out a nervous laugh as I rose. "Fill her in Rosalie, she looks like her head is going to explode."
And with that I grabbed my purse and the PBR before I stalked over to Edward. As much as I loved his little reminders, this one hurt. He was making me remember how much I loved him, how it felt to hear him say that word in my ear. He was reacquainting me with the old Bella. But I didn't want to get to know her again, because what would I do then when he left me in limbo between old and new Bella.
God, he was confusing me.
"What are you stalking me?" I asked, trying to be tough when I really wanted to cry.
"Alice said you would be here. She also said not to bug you. Am I bugging you?" He looked so nervous and earnest, like his whole world depended on my answer.
I sighed and sat down across from him, placing the PBR in front of him. He grabbed my hand as I made to pull it back and I let him draw spirals on it with his thumb where our hands rested together on the table.
"No, you aren't bugging me. You better be careful, I could get used to you being around," I shyly looked up from our joined hands to his eyes that never ceased to startle me.
God, they were green.
For a moment Edward looked at me with that crooked smile that roused the butterflies in my chest.
"I am counting on it," he finally said. I waited for him to elaborate, but then got scared that all my hopes would be dashed and quickly changed the subject.
If I wasn't such a coward I would straight up ask him what the fuck he was doing and why.
"I am not drinking this by the way," I said, gesturing to the Pabst.
"Aw, come one Bella. I like you with a few PBR's in your system."
"Oh I know you do," I said as I remembered.
"I thought you were oddly into them."
I continued to look at him with skepticism and his fuck me sexy crooked grin bloomed causing me to blush. I had to pull my hand away. The current between us combined with that smile had me re-crossing my legs and fidgeting in my seat. It was just too much.
"Can I ask you something?"
I nodded my consent.
"What color are they today? Yellow? Pink? Blue? I hope they are blue."
"What color is what?" I knew exactly what he was referring to but wanted to hear him say it, out loud.
And he was right, they were blue.
"You're panties," he said, voice dipping low and his eyes scorching me. I gave myself a moment to fanaticize crawling into his lap and showing him right there before I got it together.
"Wouldn't you like to know?" I teased.
Why in the fuck was I flirting with Edward Cullen? No good could come of this.
We sat there, eye fucking each other for who knows how long until something changed in Edward's eyes. He looked distraught.
"Do they still match then?" he whispered.
"Not that much has changed Edward," I replied, not sure if we were still talking about my undergarments that yes, I had been matching since I got my first bra. It was the OCD in me. Plus it made me feel sexy, wanted.
Far too soon I glanced at my watch and sighed, not wanting to leave Edward but needing to get back to the office. He stood up as I did, pulling me to him and hugging me tight to his chest. I wrapped my arms around his waist and breathed his distinct sun and sea sent. I could hear him doing the same to me and I felt so safe and secure and whole. I controlled the almost overwhelming desire to bring his lips to mine.
That is when I noticed them. Tattoos.
My Edward only had one. The small infinity sign on his inner wrist that he got when Nessie was born, saying that we were a family forever now.
Right.
This Edward seemed to be covered, but it was difficult to tell. I could just see the bright swirling colors peaking out beneath the sleeves of his long sleeved t-shirt. Then I noticed the design on his other wrist and the letters I couldn't quite make out running from his wrist to his elbow on the back of his arm.
It occurred to me that the boy I fell in love with no longer existed. I was flooded with a renewed sense of loss and I tried not to cry. Just like I was a new Bella he was a new Edward.
Maybe that much had changed.
I couldn't quite process what this meant for the future with him standing so close, fogging my head and making me want to mount him on the rickety wire table. I had to leave, he was too confusing. Soon I would get up the nerve to tell him to stop and leave me alone with my poor, broken heart.
Instead of saying all the things that needed to be said, I quickly kissed his jaw before I pulled away to join a seething Rose and a shocked Maggie.
His jaw was always the closest part of his face I could reach.
It wasn't till I got to the car that I even thought about Jake.
~*~*~
Then—
Life lulled in to a steady, comfortable motion, and an Edward oriented routine developed that involved music, the beach, live shows, and me force-feeding him good food on a regular basis.
Months passed, the semester ended, and Christmas in LA was upon us. It was one of my favorite times of the year because the weather was cool and there was even a slight breeze. I was looking forward to being out of school, something I considered a nuisance because it interrupted my Edward time.
We had been together four months and I was blissfully happy.
Despite my utter contentment, some things still nagged at me. He hadn't told me he loved me since that first night and I wondered if he had changed his mind. I was beginning to think I liked him a whole lot more then he liked me.
But even so, I decided that it was time to get serious. It was time to meet Charlie. I had met Carlisle and Esme after all. But they were so lovely and relaxed, not like Charlie at all. But it was time.
I badgered Edward into Christmas shopping with me, reminding him that I would probably hate it more then him, and informed him of this plan,
"We are coming out of the closet Cullen," I said to him as we browsed a vintage store trying to find a dress to go with the kick ass black leather heels I found for Alice.
"Are we gay?" He asked, selecting a greened sequined mermaid dress from the rack and clutching it to his chest to make him point.
"I am a little upset that I have to answer that seeing as I rocked your world last night."
"Didn't we already come out? I am pretty sure I didn't imagine you in my shirt."
"Indeed, but we are doing it again. It is time to meet Charlie." I wasn't looking at him, my attention was focused instead on a catholic schoolgirl skirt and vest combo that looked like something Alice would wear. It therefore took me a moment to notice his silence.
I panicked for a good ten seconds, thinking that he didn't want to meet my dad, before Edward me pulled me into his arms, pushed me up against near by wall, and kissed me so passionately it caused a girl with green hair and multiple nose rings to fake a cough and glare at us.
"Wow, what was that for?"
"I was starting to think that I cared about you a whole lot more then you care about me." He said it so fast it was hard for me to follow.
"Now that is just ridiculous," I giggled as he mirrored my earlier thoughts.
"No, I don't think it is."
"We agree to disagree then. But I don't think you are really getting what it is going to be like. "
"Is he that scary?"
"Yes," I said, deciding on a deep purple sleeveless dress and matching feathered headband for my sister. "He owns guns. And he had some sort of bromance with Mike."
"Ew."
"I know. Kathleen may be worse. She is quite flirty."
"Even around Charlie?"
"That is Mr. Swan to you and yes." He followed me to the check out counter where I threw in a scarf for my mom and a trendy bag for Kathleen. "And I know it sounds silly, but I really want him to like you. He is my dad, and I don't know. I just want the Chief to like you. Though I have my doubts, he doesn't like anyone really."
"Bella, don't worry, I will make sure he loves me," he said, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.
"Just try to look presentable ok?"
"What, don't I always look presentable?" he asked.
"Edward, you are wearing bright purple pants. Not that they don't make your ass look great, but Charlie will appreciate something more clean cut." The line moved forward and I placed my purchases on the counter as Edward stared at me, looking worried.
"That will be $1798 Miss." I absently handed the cashier my black AmEx. Edward had gone all silent again and I turned to see his eyes bulging out of his head.
"Yes, I know. I am ridiculously rich and my daddy gives me anything I want. Are you really that surprised by this?"
"You bought four things."
"Yes, well. Quality over quantity."
"Shit."
"You probably shouldn't cuss around him either." I signed my name.
"Would you like these gift wrapped?" The cashier asked.
"Yes please."
"You are not allowed to spend that much on my present," Edward said.
"It is a gift, you can't make rules." I had my eye on a surfboard that far surpassed this price.
"Oh I am making a rule. I don't want you buying me expensive shit." Money was always a point of contention between the two of us. Edward's family was comfortable. But they didn't have the buckets that my family had and Edward was always really sensitive about me buying him anything, from presents to dinner. He said that it only widened the gap between us and the only gift he needed was me.
"But Edward—"
"Nope, you can only spend as much on me as I spend on you."
"And how much are you spending on me?"
"Nothing." We left the store, arguing as we made our way through the masses Christmas shopping to my car.
"You aren't going to get me a Christmas present?" I asked, skeptical.
"Of course I am, but it doesn't cost anything. It is more thoughtful that way."
"You are more creative then me." I took my seat to the right of Edward who started the ignition and pulled into the heavy weekend traffic.
"You are a smart girl Sunshine, figure it out."
"I could cheat."
"I would return it." He was having a stubborn moment. There was no changing his mind when he dug in his heels like this.
"What if you really, really like it?"
He just shook his head and smiled at me.
"Fine. But it will probably be late. And stupid. And ugly."
"Isabella Swan, you are ridiculous with that pout of yours. Will you do something for me?"
"Of course."
"Will you go with me to a bonfire tonight? A bunch of people will be there, some friends I want you to meet." He was looking at me expectantly, like there was a chance I would say no. He still hadn't figured out that I would do anything for him.
"Oh man," I replied, messing with him. "I don't know if I can handle that."
"You will dazzle them," he said, relaxing after hearing the excitement in my voice at the prospect of learning a bit more about him.
"Just like I dazzled you," he nodded at me in agreement, ginning at me in that lopsided way he had.
"Hopefully no one gets too goddamn dazzled," he grumbled.
"They are going to think I am a spoiled little rich girl that is screwing around with their friend. They aren't going to like me."
"No they wont think that, because you aren't that spoiled. And some of the girls may think that. But all the guys are going to be insanely jealous of me."
"Do you hang out with a lot of girls Edward? When I am with the ladies, do you hang out with a bunch of indy chicks?"
"Well about that," We were sitting at a stoplight, but Edward was focused on the road a head.
"Go on," I encouraged. Tapping my fingers on the dashboard as I turned to stare at him. I was alarmed now. I had been kidding, but he started to run his hands threw his hair, a dead give away that he was anxious.
"Ok, now don't get mad but there are going to be quite a few people there, girls, that I have, well, you know. Done stuff with."
"Really? I was told that you were a man whore at one point." I could feel the rage bubbling in my stomach.
"That is actually pretty accurate."
"Charming."
"So I just want you to know, that if there are any drunken advances that it is all in the past and I haven't wanted anyone since I met you. Ok?"
"You are really failing at getting me to go to this thing."
"Come on Bella, you had a fucking boyfriend when we first got together."
"Who I dumped for your sorry ass, something I am beginning to regret." That was a bit unfair, but I hated the idea of him even looking at another girl.
Luckily he knew I was full of shit and just rolled his eyes at me. "Will you relax? That is all over now, you make me so much happier then any of that did."
"I want names, who the hell do I have to worry about?"
"You do not have to worry, I just wanted to warn you."
"Names Edward."
"Well Jane will most likely be there."
"Jane?"
"Yea I was semi seeing her when we first, you know. But I swear I was not with her once after we, you know."
I had never seen him so flustered. I was pretty damn endearing and was quickly sapping my anger.
"Ok, fine."
"Bella, don't be upset." He was pleading with me via his eyes for forgiveness.
"I am not, actually. More just curious."
"About what?" He glanced at me, suspicious
"How many, you know," I said, shaking my head, mimicking the ridiculous way he alluded to sex, "have there been?"
"We are so not having this conversation."
"Please? I will only go if you tell me."
"I really do not know," he finally said.
"That many huh?"
"Sorry Bella, I had a sex life before I met you."
"So did I!" I said indignantly. We sat in silence, both stewing, until I broached the subject again. "How old were you, the first time?"
"13."
"Whoa, that is so young. You were a little baby."
"Just a perk of living with an insane older brother and overly trusting parents. Emmett threw a house party one night and my parents trusted us to stay home alone. I got wasted, barely remember the whole thing, but it was with some chick at least four years older then me." I was horrified, trying to imagine myself at 13.
I still had braces.
I couldn't tell if he was bitter about it or just resigned. I leaned over to kiss his jaw. Pulling his face towards mine, I lingered there, only truly complete when I was in contact with him.
I knew Edward had a tough childhood, the Cullen's adopted him when he was 7 and I knew his really parents were pretty shitty. But Edward didn't want to talk about it so I didn't know details. I couldn't complain though, I wasn't sharing my past either. I did know that his man whoring was filling up some sort of emotional void. Or at least that is what Alice said.
"You had a rough go of it huh? I am sorry to bring all that up."
"Don't worry about it."
"Worry is in my nature. You will just have to deal." He glared out at the highway, taking the turn off toward my home. I wanted to rub away his glare with my thumb and mold his mouth into my favorite smile. Instead I took his hand and mentally prepared myself for what was bound to be a very long night.
~*~*~
EPOV
"She really is beautiful Edward." Kate stood beside me, beer in hand, and watched Bella entertain a horde of my best friends by the campfire. "Garrett is quite smitten."
Bella threw her head back, laughing at something Garrett had said.
"We should just run away together, really stick it to them," I joked. Kate was an old family friend, and we had grown up together.
"Naw, you are to chubby for me. I like my boys skinny." I laughed at this too. Garrett was a rail. They were a usual looking couple. Kate was even shorter then Bella and super athletic. Garrett often bragged that his girlfriend could kick his ass.
We went back to watching Bella work her magic.
Bella and I had arrived at the cook out just as the sun was going down. It had taken us an unreasonably long time to just leave Bella's house. The mood between us at the conclusion of our shopping trip was not a happy one. Being forced to admit more of the discrepancies of my past had not put me in a chipper mood.
It widened the gap between us, she was a little angel while I was intensely fucked up. It was more proof that I was not anywhere near good enough for her.
She was inherently good, despite her stuck up past. I was still unsure what I was.
To alleviate my dark mood, Bella had been extra chipper. Bustling around the house like the sex goddess she was. She tried music, laughter, and food to cheer me, obviously thinking I was upset with her.
I thoroughly kissed that notion out of her, cheering us both.
But then it was time for her to get dressed for the evening.
"What do I wear to this thing?"
"What you usually wear to bonfires?"
"No I cant do that, it is far to designer. I need Alice."
She finally settled on a tight fitting pair of boot cut jeans and a white v-neck t-shirt.
Despite her casual attire, I doubted she would blend in with the hippies and punk rockers that would be at the beach. I told her she looked perfect anyway, which she did.
Bringing Bella to this event was worth it just to she her nervous. My super confidant charmer, was scared to meet my friends. Brilliant.
She clung to my hand as we approached the crowd around the just started fire.
No one had actually believed me when I first told them months ago. Everyone knew of Bella as Alice's bitchy, unattainable sister. The fact that they looked at her that way made my blood boil.
Ben was the first to approach us of the 20 or so people gathered on the beach. I had known Ben for years since we frequented the same shows. I loved the guy but I sure as fuck did not love the way he was looking at Bella.
"So you must be the famed Bella, heard so much about you," he said, being extremely polite for no apparent reason.
"Nothing but good things I am sure," She shook his extended hand before he turned to embrace me.
"This is Ben," I explained in Bella's ear as we followed him to the group, "He and Garrett, that skinny motherfucker live with that pretty blond down the street from Jasper. And the pretty blond is Garrett's girlfriend Kate. We grew up together."
"Everyone," I said when we got close. "This is Bella Swan, and Bella, this is, well everyone."
The boys, Ben, Garrett, Seth, Sam, Paul, and several others I didn't know quickly congregated around Bella, fighting over who was to get her a goddamn drink. I didn't like this at all. I was shocked that my possessive and jealous feelings regarding Bella spilled over from private school land to my friends. I quickly pulled her away, getting her a beer myself.
"What is this?" she asked. Her nose was wrinkled and she was smacking her lips after she took the first sip.
"Beer," I joked as I filled my own cup.
"Thanks darling, but I got that. What kind of beer?"
"PBR, Pabst Blue Ribbon," I explained. "How have you never had one before?"
"It tastes like pee and water."
I laughed as she quickly downed the rest and held her cup out for a refill.
"You really want another?" I clarified, already filling her cup.
"I am oddly into it."
I laughed again and walked her back to the group. The girls were a lot less friendly. Jane and a group of other girls that I vaguely recognized huddled together by the fire, tossing glares at me periodically. But Bella made quick work of turning on the Groupie charm and assimilating into the group.
"I didn't actually believe you," Julia continued. "Mostly because you waited so long to introduce us. I am hurt."
I merely grinned at her, understanding her frustration. My eyes continued to linger on Bella. Damn, she was beautiful.
"Oh my god, you are in love with her. Edward motherfucking Cullen is in love." Kate stared at me, shocked. I did have a bit of a playboy reputation I suppose.
"Is it that fucking obvious?"
"Yup. You have that look. It does tend to kick your ass, doesn't it? When I first figured it out I dumped that skinny bastard."
"How did I miss that?"
"Well, it was only a month after we met, and it lasted a day and a half."
"She could really crush me Kate." It was scary, giving someone so much power over you. Goddamn, I sounded like a fucking control freak.
"That only makes it better baby, you can't have it all without some risk you know. "
The evening only got better from there. Bella, a bit drunk, entertained everyone with a moving rendition of an old Bob Dylan song and won over the boys by out drinking a pitiful Seth.
Emmett, Rose, Jasper and Alice finally showed up, providing me with some comfort. I may have been with my friends but I never felt at ease with them. Not like I felt with the others. It was beyond friendship, we were family.
Eventually, Bella and Garrett's laughing bout was interrupted by Rose and Alice.
"Look at Isabella Swan, mixing with the common folk." Rosalie plopped down on a log next to my love and brought her drink to her lips.
"Shut up Rose, no one would ever call you common," Bella remarked. I couldn't ever decide if Bella and Rose like each other or not. "A bitch yes, common? Nooooo."
Only Rosalie would look so pleased by a statement like that.
"Hello dear sister," a buzzed Bella said to and equally drunk Alice. "Do you know all these people?"
"Darling these are my besties."
"I can't believe that I never met your besties."
"You could not be bothered, back in the day."
This self-deprecating conversation continued as I turned my attention to Jasper.
"This is so fucking weird, seeing her hear. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love Bella. I just didn't think she would love anyone here."
"She is full of surprises."
"More like she is moving on, it is about fucking time. Not that you knew her when she was really bad, she was like a zombie."
"What do you mean? Why was she a zombie?" I asked, curious and irritated that Jasper knew something about Bella that I didn't.
"Shit, you will just have to ask her Edward. But tread lightly, she is just now getting back to herself." And with that he wandered away to smoke a joint with Sam.
It was the point in the evening where everyone was just drunk enough to start coupling off. Jasper and Alice were making out on a log while Emmett and Rose had disappeared.
The one blemish on the evening occurred when an inebriated Jane ambushed me at the keg, hands immediately reaching for my zipper. I may have been a bit harsh with the words I chose to dissuade further behavior like this, but I was pissed and it seemed to have worked because Jane didn't seem to cause any more trouble.
Until later in the night when Bella tripped tripped her as she walked toward me with a predatory look. I imagine she was trying to be sexy but she ended up looking like a giraffe walking for the first time. She went down like one too. What I had seen in her before would forever remain a mystery. Perhaps I should have come up with a clearer way to say I am not fucking interested leave me the fuck alone.
"There is my man," Bella said, winding her arms around my waist. "Where have you been?"
"Just watching you charm all my friends."
"I really like Garrett, he is so funny."
"Yes," I said shortly. "Hilarious." It was absurd, I wanted her to like them but hearing her call Garrett funny made me want to smash his face in.
"Hear that Katie-Girl?" Garrett pseudo whispered to his girlfriend. "Bella Swan thinks I am funny."
"Well I think it is funny that she thinks you're funny because you are so not funny," Kate replied.
"Oh I get it now," Bella interjected. "Kate is the funny one!"
At this we all laughed.
"Will you go on a walk with me?" I asked when the laughter died down, tugging on her hand.
"Oh of course, I haven't gotten nearly enough Edward time tonight."
We walked in silence, enjoying the sounds and smells of the sea. When the bonfire was a blip in the distance, Bella insisted that we sit. I draped an arm around her waist, pulling her close to reassure myself that she was really there.
"Were you really mad at me today?" she asked. She was referring to the icy way I handled her inquisition.
"No."
"I wont ask you such personal questions anymore." She really was adorable when she was drunk. Her eyes got huge and she looked innocent and young. Unlike most, alcohol made her talk quieter, in a sultry voice I loved.
"Bella, you can ask me anything you want. But you did call me a man whore."
"Yea I did," she squeaked out through her laughter. "I am sorry about that. I just don't like to think about it. You with anyone else."
"How do you think I felt about you and Mike?"
"Who I didn't have sex with since I met you."
Gah. Bella. Sex. Mike. Again I wanted to punch things. Preferably fucking Newton.
I took a deep, calming breath, inhaling her unique scent.
"Same for me, the point is that all doesn't matter because we have each other now."
"Your neck smells nice." So maybe not so innocent. "Lets go skinny dipping! Please? Can we?" She leaped to her feet in a sudden burst of energy and began to jump up and down with excitement reminding me once again of her sister.
"Let's do it," I agreed, getting to my feet considerably quicker then Bella. Like I would say no to anything that ended with her naked. And wet.
"Skinny dipping is on my list of top five favorite things to do," she said, stumbling slightly as she struggled to get out of her shirt. I did the same.
"And the other four?"
"Reading, live music, cooking something fancy, and finally being with you. I like that the best. Will you help me take my pants off?"
"Oh Sunshine, do you even have to ask?" Tossing aside my own shirt and jeans, I did as she asked, trailing my fingers down her firm belly until I reached the button. Giggling she pulled herself up onto me using my shoulders. I ran with her to the ocean while removing the remainder of our clothes.
"Wait," she said before I jumped into the oncoming waves. "Put me down please."
I did as she said, but I was not happy about it.
"We are easing." I groaned in response, wanting to get close to her as quickly as possible. "Stop complaining, and stop looking at me."
"If we are easing, then I am looking."
"That is fair I suppose. To the waist then."
"That's a pity," I mumbled as her lovely rear disappeared from my view, hidden by the dark waves.
"I knew you would come around. Do you think they liked me?"
"Indeed," I replied, not really listening. Damn, she was so fucking hot.
"Jane is pretty."
"Meh, in an ordinary way I guess."
"You always say the right thing Edward."
"Deeper then?" She pulled me with her until she was submerged to her chin. I grumbled again, wanting to see all of her.
She was driving me fucking insane and she didn't even know it.
"I love the ocean, that's why I followed Alice here when we were little. She hated Colorado, hated my mom, and we both missed Charlie. So when I was 8, Alice decided to move west and begged me to come with her. And I did, because I love the ocean. And Charlie. And Alice too."
I pushed her head under water, trying to distract her from getting so serious while I resisted the urge to ask her all sorts of questions.
Like how the fuck Jasper knew why she was a zombie and I didn't. I was too drunk not to get irritable when I thought about it so I didn't. Plus she was currently naked. And wet.
She resurfaced, sputtered momentarily, and then commenced to drag my head underwater, kissing me when I resurfaced.
"Bella," I said when I finished kissing her in the salt water. "I love you. Did you know that?" I finally told her for real, tired of playing it safe and seeing if she loved me back.
At first she looked stricken, shocked at my declaration. My heart dropped through my stomach and seemed to fall out of my ass. I was really stupid, telling her that, scaring her away. She dumped her boyfriend for me, she was relinquishing her position as most popular girl of our high school for me, she was changing everything. How much could someone ask for?
Then a slow smile spread across her face, illuminating her deep chocolate eyes.
"I have never said that to anyone else. Wait, are you crying?" I asked in disbelief, shaking her shoulders slightly in impatience. I hated it when she cried. Plus there was a little something I wanted to hear, but she didn't seem capable of speech at the moment.
She was currently hiccupping.
I was really a fucking idiot, telling my drunk girlfriend that I loved her. After four goddamn months. Though the last time I said it was after a week so I guess this was improvement.
At least she wasn't laughing.
"You are ridiculous. What kind of tears are these?"
"Sad?" I guessed.
She shook her head, laying her forehead on mine.
"Mad?" I guessed again, my hope building.
Again she shook her head.
"Happy?" I whispered. The floodgates really opened then.
"Oh Edward, I just didn't know. I sort of thought that you changed your mind after that first time. I wanted to tell you more then anything but I thought that I was more into you then you were into me but you love me which is really really good really," she took a shaky breath and continued on. "Because I love you too. And it is not just about having fun and such, with you and me it is love, crazy soul deep love, like it hurts when I think about you leaving."
"I think I heard I love you somewhere in there,"
"I love you Edward, " she giggled and kissed me. "I love you so much it scares me."
"It is not so bad, to be scared," I said, kissing her again. I focused on the good, not the scary, and felt content for the first time in a long time.
~*~*~
"Edward, it is going to be fine. Really, Charlie isn't that bad. I should never had told you about the guns." Bella was sitting across from my mother at our small kitchen table, staring at me as I modeled my outfit. I was in a second hand suit that had belonged to Emmett before the growth spurt that turned him into to the behemoth he is now. In a matter of hours, I would be attending the yearly Swan Records Christmas Party and meeting Bella's father.
"Guns?" Esme laughed. "Oh that is just hilarious, is that why he's so nervous? Edward, Mr. Swan isn't going to shoot you. That would be absurd."
"Who said I was nervous?" I asked as I leaned against a counter, trying to appear relaxed. Which I wasn't.
"You keep running your hands threw your hair," Bella pointed out.
"And you keep pinching the bridge of your nose," put in my mother. "Isn't he cute when he is nervous?"
"Adorable," my beloved nodded in agreement.
I glared at the two most important women in my life as they bonded over my goddamn discomfort.
"That was a rhetorical question," I snapped. "Can we please go now?"
I fidgeted anxiously with my tie. It wasn't the guns or the fact that Charlie was some hot shot in the music world. Normally, I wouldn't give a flying fuck what he thought of me. But it was important to Bella that everything went well tonight and I was incapable of denying her anything.
Bella rose and sauntered over to me, allowing me to really see her for the first time. She was clothed in a deep blue dress with narrow straps that dipped low in the front and clung to every lovely curve.
"Damn," I said as she reached me.
"Edward manners," Esme reprimanded. "Get together you two, I want to take some pictures."
I groaned. "It is not Prom Mom, it's just a Christmas party." This must have been why Emmett opted to get dressed at Rosalie's.
"You look to nice not to document, now put your arm around Bella. Don't be shy."
Bella straightened my tie, attempted to flatten my fucking crazy hair, and kissed my jaw before slipping under my arm and turning towards my mother.
"Humor me," Esme said again, seeing that I wanted to defy her from my facial expression.
I did just that, not even having to force my smile as I pulled Bella close and breathed her in.
We made our goodbyes and I hauled her out the front door, unable to wait any longer to show her just how fuck all good she looked in that dress.
I pushed her against the Volvo and kissed her till we were both dizzy.
"I like it when you're nervous," she said with a dreamy smiled that was reserved just for me.
"I love you," I said, enjoying that I could say it whenever the hell I felt like it now.
"I love you back," she replied.
I smiled and we left for Jaspers to meet up the rest of the gang.
Bella was immediately stolen away by a half dressed Alice and an already drunk Rosalie who were babbling something about fixing Bella's hair and touching up her make up.
I tensed up again as soon as my beloved disappeared. I really couldn't fuck this up and there was no way I was going to make a decent impression if I was this nervous. I wandered into the kitchen, wondering vaguely where Emmett and Jasper were as I opened the cabinet where the booze was kept.
I filled my flask with whiskey, tucking it into my pocket after taking a long swig, just in case.
Jasper and Emmett were sitting on the small patio, fully dressed, beer in hand. Jasper's cowboy boot clad feet were propped up on the railing and he didn't even look at me as he handed me a beer from the small cooler resting between them.
"So what the fuck is this going to be like anyway?" I asked the veteran. Apparently the Swan's Christmas Party was a pretty goddamn big deal.
"It is one swanky shit show," said Jasper. "There are always celebrities and corporate big wigs. The whole Hollywood scene is a bit exhausting, but the house gets decorated all festively and everyone gets really drunk."
"Excellent," said Emmett looking excited at the prospect of alcohol and the famous.
I finished my beer in one more swallow, my trepidation building.
Finally the girls emerged, twirling around in the living room to some overly cheery Christmas music.
"Damn," said Emmett, placing an arm over my shoulder and Jaspers. "We did pretty fucking good for ourselves."
He was right, the three of them really were a sight to behold.
Rosalie, the super model, was wearing a red strapless dress that was painted on and gyrating her hips in a way that was making Emmett's eyes pop out of her head like a cartoon.
Alice, the punk rock princess, had on her standard black, puffy looking thing that fanned around her body as she jumped up and down and summoned Jasper with a twitch of her finger.
And then there was my Bella with her hands thrown up in the air as she danced and laughed. Spotting me she ran over to me, throwing her arms around my neck and dragging my face to hers.
"Come on Edward," she said. "Lets go meet the parents."
I lagged behind the group as they set out for the Swan residence, taking another large gulp, hoping that if this one didn't calm me down the next would.
~*~*~
BPOV
I wondered vaguely how many individual Christmas lights decorated our house. Probably in the millions. They were all white and covered every edge of the house, every palm tree, and every shrub.
Back in the day, Alice, Charlie, and I would all hang them together, with Alice dictating what should go where while I sat on Charlie's shoulders and followed orders.
Now Charlie hired someone. Though Alice did still dictate where they all went.
We walked up the driveway and a tall man in a suit motioned for us to stop at the front door before he saw Alice, who waved and called him 'Jerry' before he let us in.
I laughed at the absurdity.
The party was already in full swing when we arrived. There was a twelve-piece band set up in the backyard where a large buffet paralleled the pool and was flanked by a huge Christmas tree. Inside looked more like a club then my house, complete with DJ and dance floor. People were milling about, laughing, drinking, and dancing. More Christmas lights glittered and it would have looked like the North Pole if all the rich and famous had been absent.
I glanced up at Edward who like equally irritated at the masses. Alice and Jasper had disappeared while Emmett and Rosalie were talking to some hotshot movie star.
"What do you say we do the whole gift exchange thing now? I am not quite ready to deal with all this yet," I said turning to Edward.
He gave me my favorite crooked smile.
"Fuck yes, lets get out of here."
"Wait, I have to go find Charlie. But I will meet you upstairs in like 5 ok?"
He nodded and turned toward the stairs as I made my way through the party in search of my dad, stopping occasionally to chat with people Charlie worked with.
I had a minor set back when the latest pop singer hit on me, but eventually I found Charlie smoking cigars with some other corporate suits.
I said my hellos, promised to bring Edward by later, and grabbed a bottle of champagne before high tailing it to my bedroom.
Edward was sitting cross-legged in the middle of my bed, hunched over my acoustic, strumming a complicated version of "O' Christmas Tree". I crawled onto the bed, laying my head on his shoulder and wrapping my arms around his waist. He continued to play as he rested his head on mine. The melody changed into something sad and sweet, I vaguely recognized the Elliot Smith song when he started to sing.
Haven't laughed this hard in a long time
Better stop now before I start crying
Go off to sleep in the sunshine
I don't want to see the day when it's dying
She's a sight to see (sight to see)
She's good to me (good to me)
He finished the song, then set down the guitar and pulled me into his lap.
"Was that my Christmas present? Because I love it," I sighed in contentment against his lips.
"No," he laughed. "That was just me fucking around. This is your Christmas present."
He pulled out a stack of random pieces of paper, a receipt, a napkin, a bunch of folded loose-leaf. Puzzled, I disregarded the paperclip and began to read. They were lyrics, his words that were now familiar to me. I smiled realizing he had given me his originals.
They were sure to be worth a lot of money someday.
Then I noticed the sticky notes that explained specific lines and phrases. They were stories of his inspiration for his beautiful words that I didn't always understand.
They involved me. The first time he realized he loved me when I gave him the mixed CD, and how I made him feel glaring at him in my huge t-shirt and ratty jeans. Describing what I looked like when I danced in the kitchen, cooking dinner. A particularly embarrassing time I fell off a dock and emerged apparently looking like a mermaid that inspired one of their more up tempo numbers.
A million things I made him feel, all decoded via sticky note.
And that's when it hit me, he was equally obsessed with me as I was with him. He meant it when he said I was his life now.
"Bella," he said, stroking me now wet cheeks. "You're breaking my heart here, I hate it when you cry. Are these happy tears?"
I nodded as I snuggled into his neck.
"Best. Present. Ever." I got out between hiccups.
"So you like it?"
"Of course I like it you big romantic idiot. I love it and I love you. Here, open yours now." I reached across Edward and pulled his present out of my bedside table drawer.
My gift wasn't as special but I knew he would like it anyway. I had dug through Charlie's stacks of thousands old records and found a 1st Edition copy of Revolver. My dad wouldn't miss it seeing as he had six, two of which were signed. I also gave him some bootlegged recordings of Bob Dylan back from when he was Robert Zimmerman and some demos of local up and coming bands I knew he would like.
He quickly kissed me before rushing over to my stereo and trying to decide what to put on. He had Bob in one hand and the Beatles in the other and was looking back and forth between them.
I couldn't help but laugh, overjoyed that I made him so happy.
"Put on Revolver," I suggested. "We don't have the proper time to devote to Bob."
We listened to the first side and split the bottle of champagne before re joining the party.
Edward tripped on the stairs on the way, stumbling slightly and giggling as he did so. It was strange, he was typically so gracefully. That and he wasn't a big giggler. I raised an eyebrow at him but was distracted when I saw Angela alone in the corner.
"Go find everyone," I said is his ear. "I am going to talk to Angela."
He nodded and we parted ways. It took me forever to wade through the sea of people to reach my best friend.
"Angela! You're here!"
"Of course I am here, I come every year," she said, hugging me. "Merry Christmas Bella. It is just as insane as usual I see."
"Yup, Edward and I were hiding out in my bedroom. You know how much I hate these things."
"Well I love them. Holy Toledo, is that Robert Pattinson? I think I am going to faint."
I laughed, pulling her through the house till we emerged in the backyard that looked like a winter wonderland. Minus the palm trees and the distant sound of the ocean of course.
I continued to chat with Angela as I watched the rest of the gang by the bar. Alice and Rose were hanging on each other, laughing hysterically. The boys kept toasting and throwing back shots.
Edward took four before I got concerned. He was supposed to meet Charlie tonight and therefore should not be pounding shots with the fellas. I left Angela talking the pop star who hit on me and made my way to my friends, looking for Charlie as I did so.
Edward was about to take another, but I grabbed it from him at the last second, handing it to Emmett who beamed at me.
"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen," I growled as Edward swayed slightly in front of me. "Are you drunk on the night you are supposed to meet my father?"
He fucking giggled. Again.
"Lighten up Bella," Emmett yelled. "It is a fucking party."
Apparently my glare said it all, because Rose and Alice seemed to think it was time to haul their men to the dance floor.
"Well? What are you doing?"
"Sunshine, I am fine. I haven't had that much to drink." This would have calmed me down, but he was inexplicably talking in a British accent.
"You are inexplicably talking in a British accent," I pointed out.
"Well fuck, that's not just in me head then?"
"No," I was seething. He knew how important this night was, how much I wanted Charlie to like him. I saw the ringer Charlie put Alice and Jasper through and I most certainly didn't want to deal with that.
Livid, I spun on my heel and started to storm off when Edward grabbed my wrist.
"Do you value that hand?" I asked, yanking away from him.
"Bella, I am sorry. Listen, I will make it better." He looked so distraught, like a five year old who was just reprimanded by their kindergarten teacher. It was adorable but I was nowhere near willing to give up my mad.
"How exactly are you going to do that? Miraculously sober up?"
"No, I do believe we are fucked in that regard. But I can make you smile again."
My glare deepened at his words and I crossed my arms over my chest, eager to see how in the fuck he was planning on doing that.
He appeared to be concentrating very hard on something before his face lit up in jubilation and he scampered away.
Sighing, I went to join everyone on the dance floor as I calculated how to now keep Edward away from Charlie for the rest of the evening. To bad Charlie wouldn't even be remotely buzzed. The man was a tank and I had never seen him even a little bit drunk despite all the beers he ingested.
It occurred to me that I shouldn't have let Edward run away.
The band had stopped playing to take a break and I found the gang in the middle of the dance floor in a circle, laughing like loons. As usual.
"Where did Drunkward run off to?" Rosalie asked.
"I have no idea. Trying to make me smile again somehow." I just continued to scowl.
"Yea Eddie messed up. That flask was empty by the time we started doing shots," Jasper commented.
"Flask?" I asked, exasperated.
"Flask!" Emmett proclaimed. "I still don't get what the big deal is Belly Boo, getting wasted is the whole point of Christmas."
"Emmett, you are an idiot," Alice put in before turning to me. "Damn you look pissed. Bella—"
She was cut off by the sound of a mic being turned on and fuzz as it was readjusted.
"Hello," said a shy, velvet voice. "I am Edward Cullen. Uh… Merry Christmas!" My head whipped around to see Edward on the make shift stage, clutching a guitar, looking awkward and unsure and incredibly sexy. "Umm, I am just going to sing a song now for my girlfriend Bella, who I love very much."
Rose stared laughing, Alice grinned at me and took my hand. Jasper started doing some sort of line dance while Emmett looked upset that he wasn't on stage with his brother.
The first few cords were tentative at first, but by the time he got to lyrics he was his typical cocky self and I was already swooning.
The Red Hot Chill Peppers, my all time favorite.
I smiled, damn it. Damn him and his amazing voice, distinct guitar, and general sexiness. His eyes locked on mine as he smiled back.
Its such a waste to be wasted
In the first place
I want to taste the taste of
Being face to face with common grace
To meditate on the warmest dream
And when I walk alone I listen
To our secret theme
Your solar eyes are like
Nothing I have ever seen
Somebody close
That can see right through
Ill take a fall and you know
That I'll do anything
I will for you
Sailin for the sun
Cause there is one
Knows where I'm from
I care for you
I really do, I really do
Come closer now
So you can lie
Right by my side
Sittin alone in the sun
I wrote a letter to you
Gettin over myself, yeah
He finished with a smirk and a whispered 'Thank you' to the enthusiastic applause of the crowd. I noticed for the first time the group of hoe bag Hollywood socialites crowded at his feet. They whistled and let out a series of catcalls when he finished. Edward didn't seem to notice, but they were waiting to pounce on him when he descended so I rushed to great him.
I elbowed my way through the sea of silicone and peroxide blond extensions till I reached him.
"You smiled!" he said in triumph, lifting me off my feet and spinning me in a circle as he kissed my neck.
"Come on rockstar, let's get you away from your adoring public." The assembly line bimbos were descending and glaring at me with open envy.
I liked that even Drunkward didn't notice them.
Why couldn't I stay mad at him? I really wanted to stay mad at him for this one, but apparently angle voiced guitar gods with bronze sex hair and crooked smiles are my kryptonite. But really, who could stay mad at that, singing one of your favorite songs.
It was impossible really.
And in my defense, he was wearing a suit. I had never seen him in a suit. He looked un-fucking-believable in a suit, probably because it was such a contrast to his typical mismatched wardrobe.
I led him back to the gang who continued to clap and generally make a spectacle of themselves. As usual.
Edward gave a bow as we reached them. He tugged on my hand and looked at me expectantly so I gave a curtsy somewhat begrudgingly.
"Celebratory drinks all around!" Emmett suggested, materializing out of nowhere with a tray of shots.
Edward reached for one and my smile disappeared again.
"What, I was kidding!" he said, handing me the shot instead. "Huzzah!"
I took a deep breath and cheersed with everyone, downing my shot moments before making eye contact with a very irate Charlie, dragging a drunk Kathleen behind him. The emergence of Charlie on a rampage had me coughing and sputtering on my drink.
Everyone turned to me in concern. Edward tucked my hair behind my ear while Alice and Rose patted my back. Emmett helpfully suggested I wash it down with another shot.
Only Jasper saw the Chief and turned his horrified gaze to mine while wrenching the bottle of whiskey out of Emmett's hand and quickly putting it underneath a nearby table.
Everyone else remained oblivious until finally looking up from their various positions as Charlie towered above us. For a moment no one moved. I remained almost doubled over, though I had stopped coughing, and looked up into my father's angry eyes. Rosa and Alice were both still wrapped around me, eyes level with mine and they continued to stare up at Charlie too. Edward had is hands on either of my cheeks, but had tilted his head to look at the Chief as well. Emmett and Jasper loitered behind us, thankfully remaining silent for the first time ever.
I am sure we looked absurd.
All at once, there was a flurry of movement as everyone untangled themselves from my body and straightened to take the Chief's punishment.
Charlie just continued to glower, mustache twitching in rage, arms crossed over his chest.
Jasper spoke first. "Hey Mr. Swan. Great party." God he was brave.
Charlie's gaze never left mine as he spoke. "Alice, I think it is time for you to escort your friends out. And I will talk to you later about that whiskey consumption. No one gets behind the wheel of a car got that? Even if you have to make up the guest rooms."
Little Alice looked ashamed as she grabbed Jasper's hand to lead him, Rose, and Emmett away from Charlie.
And then there were two.
"Dad, look, I am sorry—" I began, but Charlie put a hand up to silence me. I swallowed and grabbed Edward's hand, hoping to keep him from the revealing his intense level of his drunkiness.
"Now," Charlie began in a low voice, even Kathleen look a bit scared of him. "Edward, is it?"
Edward and I both nodded.
"Though I appreciate that you are not drinking like the others," he turned to glare at me as I stared at him in confusion. Edward was the drunkest. And if Charlie wasn't mad about the drinking, then want was he on the warpath about? "I know exactly what you're up too, and let me tell you that it isn't going to happen. So you just get out of my house now and I never want you walking through that door again."
Charlie was yelling now while Kathleen, Edward and I stared at him in bewilderment. My personal rockstar had also turned a little green and I preyed that he didn't throw up anywhere near Charlie.
"Dad, what are you talking about?"
"Bella, I hate to tell you this, but you're 'boyfriend' is just using you to get to me." Yes, because Charlie is so desirable to teenage boys. I giggled to myself. Perhaps I had more to drink then I thought. "It is not going to happen Edward, so you can just stop screwing around with my daughter. You wont be getting a record deal so you can just leave."
I laughed again, angry and sarcastic this time. Edward began to sway and all color had drained from his face that was twisted up in shock.
"Charlie, it is really not like that," I said in an attempt to be reasonable.
"Bullshit, I saw him up there. Using us to launch some sort of music career. Tell me Edward, are you in a band?"
Edward nodded.
"Do you have big dreams of being a rockstar?"
Again, he nodded.
"Exactly. Get the hell out of my house and stay the hell away from my daughter."
This seemed to snap Edward out of his silent stupor.
"With all due respect sir," Edward yelled in a way that indicated that he thought zero respect was due to the Chief. "But I love your daughter very much. And frankly it has nothing to do with you. I would fucking turn down your goddamn record contract if it meant staying with her."
"Bullshit," Charlie said again, turning purple as he yelled. We were staring to attract attention. "Isabella, go to your room and see your friend out. We are done here."
"Charlie, really, don't you think you are being a bit ridiculous." Kathleen had spoke for the first time and she was being surprisingly reasonable. I smiled my first genuine smile at her in thanks.
"I wont have any wannabe rockers using my girls!"
"Dad," I implored, trying to cool my temper. Did he really think so little of me that I would chose to be with someone like that? "Edward has been friends with Alice for years. If he wanted to use you he would have done it long ago."
I was quite proud of my extremely logical argument.
"Get. Out. You don't see him anymore Isabella." Charlie had always been excessively protective of Alice and I, probably as a result of our psycho mother, but this was a whole new level of insane that would even shame the ever-loony Renee.
"Charlie," I said, matching his decibel now and squaring my shoulders. "What are you not getting? I love him. You can't keep us apart and if he goes, I go."
And with that I grabbed Edward's hand, knowing full well that there was nothing Charlie could do to stop me in front of all these people. I was leaving before I said something to my father that I would regret and he would have to do nothing short of tying me down to stop it.
Before I knew it we were walking down my street, well on the way to Jasper's apartment. I took big, angry strides down the pavement. Blinded by my overwhelming rage, it took me a moment to realize that Edward was no longer with me.
I glanced around to see him sitting on a curb, obviously attempting to empty his flask in one drink. Sighing, I walked back to him and sat too.
"I thought you finished this off?" I asked, taking a pull of whiskey myself.
"Refilled it," he grumbled into his hands. "Bella I am so so sorry. This is all my fault."
"Edward, it is not your fault my father is a complete idiot."
"He thinks… my singing to you… using you… record deal," he continued to mumble, making me realize that he was drunker then I thought and it would be no use having this conversation with him.
"Come on rockstar," I said, pulling him to his feet and draping an arm over my shoulder. "Lets get you to bed."
I half carried a very distressed Edward to Jasper's empty apartment and let us in with the key Alice had given me, just in case.
I left Edward in the bathroom to puke his guts out while I moved the coffee table and pulled the bed out from the couch, texting my sister my location as I did so.
Apparently Charlie was on a rampage at the Swan house as the infamous Christmas party continued to rage on.
The mattress was thin and springy, but I supplemented it with soft clean sheets and loads of pillows. I was just adding the last blanket when Edward stumbled out of the bathroom, muttering profanities and apologies with every other breath.
I made sure he downed a big glass of water and helped him get undressed down to his boxers before changing into one of Alice's nightgowns and climbing in with him.
Immediately he rolled over and buried his face in my neck as I put my arms around him, holding him close to me.
"I am so sorry," he said again. "I love you sunshine."
I stroked his hair and looked into his red-rimmed eyes.
"I love you to Edward, and you have nothing to be sorry for." Except the whole getting smashed thing.
I turned off the light and eventually drifted off to sleep, comforted by Edward's deep breathing and weight on my shoulder.
~*~*~
EPOV
I woke up to a pounding headache that seemed to have a rhythm to it. Why was the drum part form Enter Sandman vibrating in my head?
I opened my eyes and found myself in an alien bed. I shuddered at the familiarity of it.
Waking up, disoriented, no idea where you are or how you got here or who you were even with. This person I was with felt like Bella and smelled like Bella, but I had never seen Bella clad in this ridiculously frilly undergarment and it was freaking me the fuck out.
Suddenly panicked, I looked up from the pink satin covered boobs I had been staring at to their owner.
My heart rate settled as I confirmed they were Bella's by finally looking up into her face.
The pounding got louder and changed, finally leaving Metallica, waking Bella in the process.
"Go away Emmett," my beloved screamed toward the door without even opening her eyes. She looked so pretty, I ignored the hangover and kissed her neck.
"Hey," she said, turning toward me. "You are up."
I nodded while I tried to figure out why she looked so sad.
Really focusing, I brought the night back. Meeting Bella's father, my alcohol soothed jitters, my song of apology and Charlie's very wrong interpretation of it. God, did Bella believe him? I had never heard of anything so ridiculous, but she loved and respected her father. Would she take his word blindly?
"Bella, I am sorry. I was just so nervous about meeting him that I had a little bit to drink to calm me down, but then a little turned into a lot. But then that song, I swear it was just to make you smile. Goddamn, this is all my fault."
She scoffed.
"How exactly is Charlie's lunacy your fault?"
"If I hadn't gotten so drunk then I wouldn't have even had thought to sing to you in front of everyone and Charlie would never have thought that I was using you."
"Well that is stupid, though I can sort of see you logic. Sort of."
"So you don't believe him?"
"Don't be absurd Edward," she said kissing my forehead. I moved toward her lips but she pulled away, re igniting all the fears she had just alleviated with her last breath.
"Edward, you threw up half of your body weight last night. Teeth brushing first I think."
Bang, bang, bang.
"Let us the fuck in," said Emmett.
"I am going to fry to a crisp out here," said Rosalie.
"It is my goddamn apartment, why the fuck do I never remember my key?" said Jasper.
"I have coffee!" proclaimed the last voice with the most compelling argument.
With that Bella bounded out of bed and threw open the door, allowing the crazies to stumble in. I noticed for the first time what my beloved was wearing. The silky, slipy, thing was a light pink and was far to short. I could just see the curve of each cheek.
I was not the only one to notice, all four of them were staring at her with admiration. Once again ignoring the hangover, I threw a sheet around Bella, realizing too late that it left me particularly exposed. Glancing down at the morning wood situation, I wrapped the sheet around both of us, moving Bella in front of me as I closed it in the front.
We stood there facing the firing squad that was laughing at our plight.
"At least someone got some last night," Rose commented. "The chief made me bunk with the maniac midget."
I looked pleadingly at Alice, not sure what to do next.
"Don't worry," she said, handing Bella and I our coffees. "I brought supplies. Bella, I have a change of clothes for you that will actually fit. Edward you will have to wear something of Jaspers. I have toothbrushes for both of you and all the materials for Jasper to make us an exceedingly greasy breakfast. You have half an hour before it is done and I suggest you shower."
"Yea hurry the fuck up too because I have big fucking news," Emmett put in.
29.9 minutes later, we were all seated cross-legged on the floor around the coffee table where there was a massive lay out of biscuits, gravy, bacon, eggs, and hashbrowns. Even Alice joined us in the unhealthy feast.
I turned green at the sight and stuck to coffee while Bella rubbed my back.
"So what happened when we left last night?" Bella inquired.
I sure as fuck didn't want to know.
"HOLY SHIT SO MUCH," Emmett exclaimed. He really should get a metal for holding it in so long. I was damn impressed. "Before Mr. Swan stormed upstairs yelling like a fucking banshee, as we are making our retreat, I hear this guy, J. Jenks asking some other suit about you. Asking if you played shows and shit. So I popped my head in and informed them that fuck yes you play, that you are actually in a great band. So apparently, this J. Jenks owns dude like 12 million clubs and is looking to book a local band for a regular spot on Tuesday nights and an opener spot on Fridays. Dude, he wants us to stop by on Monday and play for him. This is huge!"
My first reaction was excitement, but it was only to be followed by complete devastation. If we got this gig, I would be confirming every fucking thing Charlie accused me of.
I was about to tell Emmett that it would not be happening, but Bella interrupted me.
"Edward! That is great," Bella squealed, kissing my jaw and making my head pound with her decibel level.
"We aren't doing it."
My proclamation was greeted with a moment of silence before they freaked out all at once.
"Why the hell not?"
"Isn't this your fucking dream?"
"WHAT ABOUT THE REST OF THE BAND YOU SELFISH SON OF A BITCH."
"I thought performing was your thing? Don't go all puss on us man."
Only Bella was silent. She held up a hand to the rest, cutting of their various tirades.
"Explain."
"We don't need to do that shit, playing in some trashy Hollywood club? No thank you. I mean, I want to make the band work more then anyone, but it is not worth it. There is no fucking way I am compromising my artistic integrity for that shit."
There, that sounded like a reasonable excuse.
Emmett jumped to his feet, ready to strangle me while everyone else looked like they were going to freak out again, but Bella spoke first.
"Bullshit. You are going to do this Edward, it is nonnegotiable."
I opened my mouth to negotiate but she continued on.
"Don't think you are tricking me for one minute. You don't want to prove Charlie right. Well we are going to ignore the irrational ramblings of my deranged father. Plus, I like seeing you on stage. It does things to me."
By the end she was bright red. Everyone was giggling as they demanded to know what exactly Charlie said to us last night.
That Monday, J. Jenks hired us to play two shows a week at two different rock and roll clubs. He didn't pay us much, but I didn't give a fuck. I was doing what I loved while the girl I loved was always there, listening from back stage or sitting at a high table in the back with the girls.
And that was how we ended up getting a lot of exposure in Hollywood while Charlie continued to hate me.
Though he grounded Bella for a month after her disappearance, he was out of town for most of it. Plus they must have had some heart to heart because he would even let me come over, with intense supervision.