Warnings: As ever there is a BDSM warning in effect (not much of that in this chapter), spanking of an adult and majorly in this chapter mentions of/descriptions of rape – so any one who is triggered by that maybe you might want to wait for your party at the arrival gates?

Some will notice that I have changed the description of this story – as the story has progressed away from the lose of control incident at the beginning, I felt it was necessary to amend the description. Not sure of the exact wording yet but what it is currently will have to do.

This has gone darker than I originally thought it would but you have to go where your muse takes you so here goes.

As ever I hope you enjoy this new chapter and let me have your thoughts/opinion/ constructive criticism in the reviews or PM's.

Happy New Year!

All the love, K xx.

Laughter rang out and bounced off of the walls of the Briefing Room as the shift filed in to take their seats. Hermann was regaling everyone with tales of his children's antics on his day off, whilst Otis was trying to convince Dawson of a new scheme that he had concocted to make more money at Molly's. Brett was leaning backwards in her chair to chat with Cruz as Tony and Capp were ribbing each other at the top of the room. The doors at the back of the room banged as the two Lieutenants entered. The din of the room continued untouched by the two officers' presence. Both men stood side by side at the back of the room, shoulder to shoulder, leaning slightly against each other; watching but not joining in like they would have done a month or so ago.

Casey flicked a gaze down to his watch before moving it to look out on to the forecourt, scanning the passers-by for a certain member of his team that wasn't present. After the worry of the last shift and the non-communication from Olivia, his nerves were palpable. Next to him Kelly pulled his phone out of his pocket, checking the messages again for the thirtieth time in the last ten minutes, murmuring in Casey's ear

"She'll be here."

His voice held little conviction of the statement however. Neither man had the grounds to be able to say that she would be. Neither had had a reply from Olivia for weeks. Matt's elbow dug into Kelly's side as the doors of the Briefing Room and a sombre-looking Chief entered. Severide shoved his phone back in his pocket with a last glance. The room quietened considerably with the Chief's entry however murmurs remained. The absence of one of their own wasn't missed by anyone in the room.

"Another no-show."

Hermann's murmur carried in the suddenly quiet room. He ducked his head at a sharp stare from the Chief however, no apology was issued or requested. Everyone was thinking the same thing. At least Olivia had turned up to shift before- even if she had been about as much use as a chocolate fire guard. The Chief's voice broke the silence in the room,

"I have been on the phone with CPD for the past half an hour in regards to Rhodes – they will have officers coming down here to speak with everyone this morning in connection with a charge that Rhodes has filed with the Police."

The murmurings that had started with the mention of Rhodes name increased to full out yelling from some in the room. "What the Hell's and "Charges of what?" filled the room. Casey and Severide traded looks at the statement. Their brows furrowed as they each racked their brains for what the charge could be for – any charge of misconduct against the house would have gone to the CFD not the CPD. "Voight?" was mouthed by Casey to Severide however this was dispelled by Severide's confused shrug and any further thoughts were interrupted.

Boden had called the room to order quickly, ceasing the yelling down to under-breath mutterings and angry looks. Until again Hermann spoke up louder this time with,

"What has she charged us with – she's the one that seems incapable of knowing when her shift is and how to do it. At least we can manage to turn up to our shifts!"

Laughter and agreements filled the room,

"Rhodes has filed a rape charge against Aiden Miller."

Laughter stopped, voices died and the whole house seemed to cease to move for a minute. Matt and Kelly seemed to be frozen at the back of the room, Brett had tears running down her face as she pressed a hand to her mouth and Hermann's face went pale, his mouth hung open with another cutting remark that never came. The Chief's words seemed to resonate around the room.

After her non-show at last shift everyone had been expecting something to happen at the start of this shift, from lame excuses to a pink slip. Hell, there had been a bet going around with Otis tallying the possible outcomes all of last shift. There had been 10-1 odds that she would roll up late and 25-1 odds that a yelling argument between her and Casey had been a sure bet. No-one had bet this by a long shot.

"Olivia has apologised for her missing shift last week and has asked to take some holiday in the wake of this. She won't be on shift for at least a few weeks. We will be having relief fill in on Truck until the time that she is ready to resume duties. I expect the full co-operation of this house in the wake of this."

Boden continued in the wake of the silence that had befallen the house.

"This is a blow… one of our own was in pain and we failed to notice it; or ignored it. Olivia is going to need everyone out of this house beside her…."

The room remained in silence as the Chief left. Never in history had a Briefing been so quiet at the end. Without a look sideways, Casey turned heel and just walked out of the back door of the room, Severide hot on his heels.

Matt POV

The door of my quarters slams behind me, rattling the glass in the panes as I sink downwards onto the bed. The world goes dark as I press my head into my hands as tears burn in the corners of my eyes. Even in the darkness, Olivia's face still stays fixed in my mind – her small pale face, eyes wide and red-rimmed as she stood in the hallway of our apartment that night. A sob catches in my chest – how had we missed this? I hear the door of my quarters open again and the bed dips beside me. Kelly's shoulder presses against mine – it's so familiar a gesture, from work to home life. I pull an arm away from my face and turn slightly to look at him.

Kelly's face had gone very pale and his eyes were vacantly staring at the floor. I move a hand to grip his, suddenly feeling the need to hold on to him least he run away as well. What ever sense of guilt that was twisting in my stomach I knew would be in Kelly's too. Worse even for him. I knew that Kelly would blame himself for yelling at Olivia the way he had that night. Both of us were guilty of not letting her say what she needed to. We had jumped to assumptions so easily and not trusted her at all.

I feel Kelly grip down on my hand as we sit there motionless side by side, leaning on each other.

No POV

Dawson had split off from the main group after the Briefing and had been closeted in the changing rooms ever since. Here she sat, turning over and over in her mind every encounter with Rhodes that she had had for the past couple of months. They were few and far between. With Rhodes close friendship with Casey they hadn't been close; no matter how far apart they had been – she had thought that Olivia could of, would of, come to her – that she would have confided in her. After Jones' death she had made a point of trying to be friends with everyone in the House – to be sure that they knew that they could talk to her if they needed to. Yet it appeared that that had not been the case. Dawson sat there staring at her hands as tears started to roll down her face. The bench dipped beside her as Brett sat down. Her arm wrapped around Dawson's shoulder as they sat, tears running down Dawson's face and Brett, already out of tears from crying, blaming themselves for not doing more. Every single Ladies Night that Rhodes hadn't been invited to, every single girl's night in that she hadn't known about flashed through Brett's mind as she questioned why they hadn't included her; why they had been content to leave her with no-one to talk to.

It was a morose group that congregated in the dining room. They sat slumped in chairs, no words had been uttered from anyone of them. No-one knew what to say to break the silence that had settled over the room. The rest of Squad sans Severide had settled at their round table, cards in hand a poker game was underway yet no-one seemed very invested in what they were doing.

Hermann sat on the couch, his face still white and his eyes were fixed on the floor. He hadn't said a word and looked as though a small puff of breath would blow him over. Mouch sat next to him, his gaze for once fixed on Hermann and not on the TV that was flickering in front of them. The rest of Truck was fixed at the long table, their gazes fixed on Hermann. Their worry was clear on their faces.

Olivia POV

I sat outside of the firehouse longer than I had intended. It was a quick visit – that was what Chief Boden had said on the phone – just a few pieces of paper to fill in for the leave request. Still the possibility of seeing anyone from shift had left me hiding in my car. I exhale a breath sharply,

"Come on girl – you can do this!"

I mutter at myself as I grab my jacket from the passenger seat and step out of the car. The house is abnormally silent for the start of shift – hell even the Squad table on the Apparatus floor was empty. The thought that Briefing was still in session was squashed as I approached the Chief's office and can see him at his desk.

Connie is absent from her desk and so I knock and pop my head around the door.

"Morning Chief – now a good time?"

"Of course. Come on in."

His greeting is cheery enough, his smile is genuine. I shoot a small smile back still uncertain of his standing on the events. After all, I had left shift a man short – charges being filed or not. Boden has expressed on the phone that with all that had happened it would be overlooked and ignored. Nothing further would be done about that.

"You needed some papers signed?"

Best not to beat around the bush after all, I didn't want to stay in the house too long. I wasn't sure I was ready to see all of the pitying looks or see Matt and Kelly's faces just yet.

Boden pushes the papers across to me and I quickly fill them out – they are basic enough forms - just the normal Leave Request forms that I have filled out hundreds of times in this job. They take a minimum of ten minutes to fill out and I am already on my feet as I push them back over to the Chief and am heading towards the office door without another word.

"Olivia!"

The Chief's voice stops my hurried exit and I turn to face him,

"Everyone here at 51 is on your side for this. Take as much time as you need."

I nod slightly, it's nothing that he hasn't already said on the phone. It's just words though, in the end always was just words. The time for needing 51 to have my back had come and gone – he was just trying to placate his own feelings on the matter.

"Thanks Chief."

No-One's POV

"I shouldn't have been so harse on her."

Herrmann's voice was quiet compared to his normal volume but the words till carried in the room.

"You couldn't have known what she was going through."

Mouch tried to reason with Herrmann however, his well-meaning words fell on to deaf ears as Hermann continued to berate himself.

"I should have asked her what was wrong. I should have been more patient."

Mouch had no reply and the room remained silent.

The doors at the end of the door swished open and Dawson and Brett came through. Dawson's eyes were red-rimmed but other than that they showed no signed of the tears shed.

The mood in the room was palpable and Dawson shot a glance at Brett who just shrugged.

"Okay, come on guys. It's not going to help anyone, especially Rhodes, if we are just moping around. She's gonna need us…"

Olivia POV

The walk away from his office feels like the end of something. The urge to walk straight out of them doors and never come back is strong. To never have to come back into this House, to never have to see anyone from here again – it sounds like heaven in this moment.

The sadness about what happened has past and now the anger had set in. The anger at Aiden for doing this to me; the anger at Matt and Kelly for not listening, for not being there when I needed them to be; the anger at the rest of the house for the way that they had ignored my behaviour. I had been burning alive from the inside out and no-one had decided to try and help. They had left me to burn and I was pissed about it.

Better to get home, to calm down before I done anything that would further ruin the career that I had worked so hard to save. It was then that the words came to my ears from the dining room door,

"She's gonna need us now – we need to rally around her."

With those words, I turn from my path out of the House and back towards my car and head towards the dining room, anger burning brightly in my chest. I needed them now! Not bloody likely- I had needed them a lifetime ago, now was a bit too late.