Chapter 11

Life changing words

"Felicity…" Oliver whispered and she opened her eyes to see him, asleep, on the chair. He was whispering her name. And it would be heartwarming if it wasn't for the pain she could hear behind the word. It was like he was begging her for something. His breathe was labored and then, he opened his eyes suddenly, with a gasped "No!"

He found the woman's eyes observing him and never a sight calmed him down quicker than her truthful and very alive blue irises.

"Oliver, what happened?" Felicity asked, grabbing his hand between her own.

He swallowed and tried to get up, but Felicity was having none of that. She pulled his hand with the small strength she had in her condition and only her gasp of pain made Oliver sit once again.

"It was just a nightmare." he said trying to diffuse her worry with his light tone.

"You were saying my name." Felicity replied, not fooled.

Oliver sighed and this time when he tried to rise she let him. She knew he wouldn't leave, she saw it in his eyes. But he needed time to arrange his thoughts and he couldn't do that sitting, he had to be moving, pacing in front of her bed and looking to the floor. He was a man of action.

"When I came back from the island I used to have vivid dreams. I even attacked my mother once when she tried to help me. With time they diminished, but when something… bad... happens they return. And they are vivid, so much that you don't know you are dreaming." he said, without looking at her. "I dreamed of you, dying in my arms." he confessed and finally looked at her with troubled eyes. His irises were deep like a pool in the middle of a storm, she could feel the winds shifting behind them, howling in pain and regret.

"But I'm alive, and I'm fine." she said, smiling softly.

"But I wasn't there to protect you! I promised Diggle when I brought you aboard that I would protect you, and I failed you, just like I failed Tommy and if they were minutes later you would beside him right now." Oliver said, his voice faltering and Felicity looked at him shocked, he was losing control and for once wasn't trying to regain it. It was nothing like his previously moving words. These words were raw, his demeanor was like the one of a wild animal, he was dripping regret and self-hate and Felicity berated herself for not noticing that before. His eyes should have been her first tip, normally ready to fight, now they were at the same time lifeless and ranging a war against himself.

"Oliver, please come here." Felicity asked and stretched her arm. He acquiesced immediately and grabbed her fingers. She pulled him towards her and whispered the life changing words that would forever reign over his world.

"I care about you Oliver, so much it hurts! I was sad because of you and Sara when she returned and I found your clothes." Oliver tried to interrupt her, but she put a finger over his lips. She was not sure where that bravery came from, if it was the effect of the meds or the sight of him hurting so much because of her, but she didn't want to step back now. She almost died and the time for regrets was long gone. "I spoke with Sara and she explained everything. And I felt relieved. I felt relieved because I care about you in a way that I shouldn't let myself care, because you are all the kinds of wrong for me. You are reckless and hotheaded, you had rather fight with your fists than your rationality. You are not what I envisioned for myself. But now, with you right here in front of me I won't care how dangerous it his, because never a wrong felt so right." and before Oliver could think of moving, her lips where already over his. And it felt so right!

It was like all the pent-up frustration poured into their lips, each wanting to taste and to give, to feel and to take. And only when Felicity gasped and touched her ribs did they break up. They stared at each other, not sure what to do or feel. And Sara's words echoed inside Felicity's head - "Because you need to know." and now she understood. Oliver Queen was attracted to her if his almost black irises, deep breathe and incredible kissing abilities were of any indication.

"Felicity..." he whispered in a way that made her shiver.

"I've wanted to do that for a long time." she confessed and Oliver sighed, closing his eyes and falling over the chair.

"This changes everything, you know?" Oliver said.

"Only if you want to." she replied. She wouldn't guilt trip him because of a kiss that might have been only fueled by lust, even if she hoped that was not the only factor.

It would hurt, so much, but she wouldn't cry or say anything about that ever again, she would be a rock, evoking all the strength she had in her. She saw him sigh once again, squeezing his eyes. And while she was bracing herself for the worst, Oliver finally answered.

"I want it." he said and finally opening his eyes again she could see the peace behind them. There was no storm in there.

"Are you sure? I'm not some one night stand! You do realize what you are getting yourself into, right?" Felicity asked and Oliver nodded.

"If all the mistakes I made concerning you taught me something is that you are one in a million." he said and Felicity smiled.

"Make that a billion."

Oliver smiled softly, a smile that made him look younger and innocent, all shiny eyes and handsome face, no dark past or hellish memories.

"You can sleep with me if you want." Felicity said eyeing his uncomfortable looking chair. "I mean sleep sleep, not sleep. Not that I wouldn't want to sleep with you, I bet there is no one that wouldn't want to sleep with you. You are very sleepable... Is that even a word? Okay, shutting now before it's the embarrassment the cause of my death." she said, her blush showing under the bruises in her face and her neck.

"I would love sleep sleep with you." Oliver said, barely suppressing his shit-eating grin.

Felicity tried to roll her eyes but since it made her dizzy she only observed him taking his shoes off and sitting on the bed. And that was when she was really grateful for all the money Oliver had because her room besides being private had a bed big enough to let two people lay beside each other without the shot one hurting beyond the bearable.

"Sleep." Oliver said, kissing her temple.

"Yeah, right." she thought to herself, like sleeping beside Oliver Queen would be easy, but before she could think more about how warm she felt, the darkness enveloped her and the tiredness took her prisoner under its biddings.

I was needing this fluff, seriously, I was feeling Olicity deprived, and since I'm kind of scared about tonight's episode (I really don't want Sara to come and save Felicity, worsening her self-esteem even more) I needed to have my happy place. Especially with Felicity being the one to give the first step: I read a lot of fanfics where is always Oliver the one to kiss her first, well I kind of wanted to change that. Hopefully, you liked it!

And probably, I will update the next chapter today... I'm still writing it, but I think I will be able of updating before the show airs...