T R I A N G L E L O V E Chapter 11: Lost, a vocaloid fanfic

A/N:

Onwards to Chapter 11~

I wonder how long the second part should be. . . ?

. . . I'm addicted to Lon's and Soraru's cover of Rin's and Len's song Remote Control. Epic NND duet. They're definitely my new favorite singers~ :3 I have no idea just how many times I've replayed it on Youtube and on my mp3, I just can't stop listening to them. XD

h t t p : / / w w w . y o u t u b e . c o m / w a t c h ? v = M P U h j c q f e q w & f e a t u r e = c o l i k e

Of course, take away the spaces. ouo

I should have known something was up when Rin Kagamine was being sweet to me. She's the twin tailed beast's right hand (wo)man. Her little blonde imp. You would have thought that I knew better, especially since it was perfectly avoidable. Sadly, I'm horribly ashamed of myself. . . Still am, even after it's been five years ago. . . Of course, with that curious look in your eye, you want to know what had happened, don't you? You must love listening to me spill my heart's deepest troubles and desires. Well, I wouldn't say desires, not yet, I should say. So, you are just an "acquaintance", if that. It must be a treat, so I'll keep giving you more since you're behaving so well and have decided to stay here and listen to my pointless drabbles.

It was a Thursday, nearly two weeks after I had dinner with Leon's family, exactly a week before Christmas was coming. Did I neglect to mention that my parents thought that it would have been best for me to not go to school? When Leon and I came back from the cafe that day, the day I let Miku know the extent of my anger, they told me that they were going to be busy and that they felt safer if I stayed at home. That's why it was about two weeks after the dinner instead of one. I wonder why they forced me to stay? Had they heard of what I had done and thought that I needed to stay home to cool off? That couldn't have been it since I was forced to stay home for a week. I was also told not to pick up the phone to answer calls or actually send out calls unless it was from them and only them. I had never felt more confused in my life , but I stayed quiet when they explained the details of what was necessary for me to follow. Just like the patient daughter that they raised me to be. Well, I digress, yet again. . .

Leon texted me earlier that morning saying that he came down with something so I was alone, staring at the clothing inside the same men's department Leon had bought his friend's gift, fogging up the cold glass with my hot breath that separated me from the items. I was debating on whether or not I should buy him a gift. I may have stopped speaking to him, but I never stopped gifting him. I regretted not doing so the first year of our separation and I nearly killed myself for it. I absentmindedly traced little circles on the glass. I would have completely forgotten that I had to go to school and I would have stayed there all morning, even after the tips of my fingers would turn blue from the cold, were it not the gently tapping on my shoulder.

I turned around and there she was: the fair-haired monstrosity. However, she betrayed that horrid image in my head when she smiled, no, beamed at me. Of course, I was on edge and I felt myself go rigid at her touch. She didn't seem to notice, or maybe she did and just didn't care, when she spoke up,"Mornin' Kiki~!"

I froze. "Kiki" was an old nickname that Kaito had given to me, among many others. I shuddered. Did he talk about me behind my back? I don't recall ever telling anyone in my group anything like that. Or it could be because they never ask, unless you count Leon who seemed a little too curious about him. . .

Rin tilted her head in confusion. "What is it? Are you okay? You look kinda. . . pale. Uh, -er. Paler."

I took in a shaky breath and shook my head. "Nothing. Just cold, that's all." I stuffed my hands into my pockets. "What are you doing? You're normally in school at this time."

"I woke up late this morning. Len-Len was being a meanie by leaving me behind. Can you believe the nerve of that guy?" she asked, looking genuinely baffled as to why her double would do such a thing.

Well, double by looks, not by personality. Where Rin is spiteful, loud, arrogant, crude, hyper, and physically strong, Len is the complete opposite of her. He's kind, soft-spoken, intelligent, modest, and meek. He's even Kaito's closest male friend. Very close to the point rumors began to fly around questioning their friendship and sexuality. I didn't mind if Len went that way, but it always bothered me that somebody would say that about Kai-Kai. I guess the thought of it made me uncomfortable, picturing him being intimate with someone of his own gender when really, it was his choice. Normally, I would have voiced my opinion, but I never did since I just brushed them aside. With Len's feminine appearance, you wouldn't think twice if their relationship was about them both being male. In any case, the rumors did die down. And I will only thank Miku for that, only that.

I decided to humor Rin and mimicked her shocked expression. "He did? What a jerk! How could he do that to you?"

I must have played my part right because her expression lightened up and eagerly nodded. "That's what I'm saying! He thinks just because he's got so many girls at school drooling all over him, he'd fool you into thinking he's some kind of king or something! Oh my gosh, let me tell you what that little Shota did last week—"

Selective hearing is your best friend, sometimes. I heard bits and pieces of Rin's monologue, which I'm sure she didn't notice and care, until we walked each other all the way to school. She finally decided to shut up when she saw the steps and bounced on top of them, making her enormous white bow jump up and down. Which reminded me of something.

"Rin?"

"Yeah?"

"Where'd you get the bow? That's new, I've never seen you wear it before."

"Oh! Miku-nee gave it to me as a gift. She said I'd look even cuter if I pull my bangs away, too." she gushed. "What do you think?"

It wasn't until she mentioned that bit that I noticed she did indeed have white pins in her hair. It's a wonder I managed to miss that.

"I like it. You do look nicer with your hair out of your eyes. " I walked up the steps and passed her. "Thanks for walking with me."

"No problem Mii-chan~ Thanks for letting me!" She opened the door for me.

During the whole walk, I kept asking myself why she would do this and I still hadn't come up with an answer. Well, I came up with a few, but I didn't even know Rin other than her name and whatever little tidbit Len said about her. And from the way she rages to people who piss her off in the hallways. Even though she's acting like a sweetheart to me, then, I found it strange how it just magically came to be. There had to be something up.

"You didn't have to do that." I told her, shrugging towards her hand that kept the door opened. I intended to stall her. Rin's also known for her short temper. Little Miss Time-bomb.

"Why not? I felt like opening it up as my way for saying thanks~" she lulled and giggled.

"I have two hands and I was ahead of you. You should have let me do it as my way of thanking you for gracing me with your presence." I pressed on.

She looked like she would have nothing of that as she waved a dismissive hand. "Psssh, oh stop it~! Come on, I insist." She said, her cheeks had turned a light shade of pink. I couldn't tell if it was from the cold, from embarrassment, or from anger.

"You're in class 7-C, aren't you? Isn't that on the second story? You have only two minutes left before the late bell rings."

She visibly tensed up. "Then don't keep me waiting. Come on, let's both go inside. And I insist you go in, first." she stressed.

I shrugged. "No thanks. I just remembered that my first class is all the way in the back. I use the back door to get in since it's easier and quicker."

Just as I had turned to leave, I felt something sharp go through my shoulder and turned around to see Rin's long, perfectly manicured gold nails dig their way through the fabric.

"Dammit! Why the hell are you so freakin' difficult? I thought it was weird that Miku makes such a big fuss about you, but I can see why she does, now." she snapped.

Instead of slapping either her face or her hand, I decided to try and stall her as long as I could. "Oh? The lovely Miku Hatsune actually talks about me? Oh my gosh! I feel so honored~!" I squealed in mock delight.

I really should have ran ahead of her when I had the chance. It didn't look good for me when she straightened up and tried to even out the height difference between us. "Iroha! Mizki! Come here!"

I suddenly felt a pair of hands grab mine and harshly pull them back behind me while another set pushed down onto my forehead and knocked me down the steps. Just where did they come from? I tried to tilt my head back to see who was handling what until it was shoved back down. Guess I'd have to wait then.

"Come on, we've got to hurry before anybody sees us! Let's go!"

Rin shooed us away and I was force to backpedal my way to the same path we came. Walking backwards without being able to turn your head and without swinging your arms to keep you balanced was just a tad bit uncomfortable. You should try it sometime. But I don't really recommend it.

"What are you three going to do? Be one of those dirty, little pawns of the 'Queen' and try to kill me off at the park like in those movies? Is that it?" I couldn't help but try to be a little sarcastic with them. Even though my heart felt like it was trying to leap out of my throat, I felt like I had to at least put up a facade to make them think that I wasn't afraid.

You know, I wonder what's worst: Actually admitting that you're afraid, or putting up a ruse to try and hide your fear? The way I saw it, if I had admitted that they were scaring me, then maybe they'd make fun of me and I hate that. However, if I tried to act tough, they might get even angrier with me and they might try to do even more damage to me. So, I guess I have to question myself now. . . Did I value my pride more than my well-being? Well? You tell me. Did I? . . . Actually, I don't want to hear it. I want to finish this up as soon as possible, I have somewhere to go to.

I wished I knew where exactly they were taking me, but Rin had enough of me talking and bound my mouth with a gag and blinded me with her bow. "Miku could always get me another one. She'll understand why I had to burn it."

. . . Can somebody say bi— Nevermind, this happened five years ago, gotta stop keeping a grudge against them, especially since Iroha and Mizki were such sweet girls. Well, I'm still here, so you could see that it's a mega spoiler. Boo.

Since I could no longer see or say anything, I don't really remember much of what happened. And it didn't happen suddenly either. They talked to each other for a bit about pointless stuff. Well, in my opinion they were. Then again, I'm on death row because of them and I highly doubt that most people gave a damn about their executioners, anyway. At this point, however, I was terrified, but I tried to keep my cool and think about what I could do. After weight my options, I realized there really wasn't anything I could do. Well then. . . I was screwed. And I hated how I was the victim in this, this time. I usually was the person to save someone else, so yeah, now I knew how Kaito felt when Dell and his group used to torment him. And it wasn't just them, but eh, I'm dragging this out too long, aren't I? Anyway, I could hear Mizki whisper something to one of them.

"Do we really have to do this?" she asked, her voice laced with worry and doubt. "She didn't do anything. I mean, she probably didn't even know what—"

"Shut up! Just do what she told us to do and don't complain!" Rin snapped at her.

I felt the hands that were holding my shoulders tense up. That could have been either Iroha or Mizki, Iroha becoming defensive that Rin spoke to her friend like that or Mizki trying to hide her frustrations. It won't matter in the end.

I guess I was mainly stuck in my own thoughts because I didn't feel the time pass until my back and head was slammed against something hard. It was metal, of course, because I felt my head was ringing. And the dull pain was a good place to start. At this point, I was mentally freaking out. So, I had assumed that they were just going to try and scare me, that the whole hurting me thing was just a bluff. Pffft. Well, wasn't I horribly mistaken?

Then, that's when they started to whack my body with blunt objects. I didn't know where to block, what to defend, so I did the most of what I could do in that position. I curled up in a ball, and turned my face until I was pressing my nose against the dirt. It was loose, with some gravel mixed in with it. I could have been at the park, but I didn't really know. All I knew at that time was that I wanted them to finish what they were doing and leave me be, hoping that maybe somebody would find me, anybody. I was scared.

And then I screamed.

I screamed as loud as I could until I was hoarse, but they didn't stop. Somehow, it almost felt like deja vu, I don't even remember why. Something about what they where doing to me just seemed familiar, painfully familiar, which would probably explain why I started thrashing around and throwing choice words at them.

"Come on! Let's stop, look at her head! Rin, I don't want to, Miku made me go with you because she threatened to—"

A sharp slap could be heard and I couldn't help but wince. My stomach was hurting, my head wouldn't stop spinning and I could taste something salty in my mouth and I had to spit it out. But it hurt more to know that Mizki was thrown into all of this against her wishes, and I wanted to get up and hurt Rin and Miku for pressuring her into this. She didn't need any of this.

Then Iroha started screaming at Rin and Rin at Iroha. They were throwing insults at one another, saying cruel things to each other and I felt somebody trip and twist my ankle. I mean, really? Why me? Just because I didn't like somebody, I was being put through all of that crap? If it wasn't for the throbbing sensation I was feeling in my head, I would have tried to get away. But I couldn't when I felt somebody yank and twist the roots of my hair.

"And must where the hell do you think you're going?" the imp snarled. Maybe I was trying to escape?

In any case, I was in no condition to fight back in that position with my senses dulled like that. So I waited until my body grew numb from her beatings (I could tell that it was only her because I could hear Mizki and Iroha walk away from her). I was just wanting it all to be over, but I guess I was still far from it when I heard Mizki scream.

"Rin! Miku just wanted you to hurt her! Put that away, give it to me, just leave her alone!"

. . . If I wasn't freaking out before, I definitely was at that point. Now, my mind started going off at about a hundred miles an hour, just wondering what the hell Mizki was yelling about because I tried my best to force my mind to not let whatever I was thinking get to me. It wasn't until I felt someone pull on my pant leg, the sound of fabric tearing, and the sharp, stinging pain on my thigh that told me that I should probably try to scream again.

Which I found myself incapable of doing. Instead, I just remember gasping and clawing at the air. I think I was talking to myself because Rin commented about how she didn't believe that I was crazy or something. I bit my tongue, I remember I did that because it hurt and it was bruised the next day because I was talking so fast and it had happened by accident. G-give me a sec.

. . .

It hurt. A lot.

She cut me. Rin cut me.

Why weren't you there to help me? Just like that evil man who grabbed me and didn't let me go. Why did you tell him those things? Why didn't you run, like you told me to? He didn't want you, he wanted me. . .

I was so scared, Kio, I was so, so, so scared.

. . .

I heard someone fall, and I knew it was Rin. Iroha punched her hard, I knew she did because I heard a loud pop. But that didn't make the hurt go away.

. . . Everything was so dark, so very, very dark. . . I couldn't hear anything, I couldn't feel anything.

I thought I ended up like you.

You never came back, you liar.

You lied to me.

You said that you would never do that, that you would take care of me so that nobody would know. You were scared of what I was and you didn't want anybody else to know. You wanted me and I wanted you, only you. You're a liar and I hate you for it. You're just like Kaito, like Spark, like mother, like father.

Like everyone.

And I loved you, so. . .

Everything was so dark and then it was bright when my eyes finally opened. I was so stupid. I looked at my body. Cuts and gashes were everywhere on my arms, legs, my tummy, even my neck.

She missed. A lot.

Why did she want to hurt me? I never did anything to her, I never did anything to them. I just wanted to go to school, like a good girl. I am a good girl. You said so yourself, remember?

My skin was dyed with different hues that came with bruises. It was easy to see that. It forced me to look at my old scars, forced me to see the places that marked the times I hurt myself and stayed there. Remember that scar you gave me by accident? I don't really remember, but mother told me that I fell from the tire swing and rolled down to the little creek. That rock got to me before you could. It's gone; the skin is bumpy and uneven, but it's still soft.

I'll never forgive you. Not ever. Ever.

You never came back, you never came back to protect me. I got hurt, you see? And it's all your fault.

And it's because of you mother and father wouldn't let me go back to school for so long. It's because of you girls like Rin, Iroha and Mizki were forced to do what that Devil ordered to do. They never came back to school, they weren't allowed to. Mizki couldn't afford to get out. Miku wanted her to go. She didn't like her, she was too quiet and that scared Miku.

So she got rid of her, like how she wished I was rid of.

But I'm still here. I'm still here and you're not. Why didn't you hold me? Piko had to do that. Mother and father tried to, but I wouldn't let them. They did this to me, they brought me here. Why couldn't they just leave me alone? They did whenever I wanted to go away and hide in the meadow. Do you remember the meadow? You found it for me. It was our secret place to play. It was also the last place I saw you. Why couldn't you be happy? You were never mad, never sad.

I hated the smell of that place. I hated hearing all of those weird beeps. I hated not being able to think clearly or hear through my left ear. I hated having to see my reflection. Did you know my hair looked a lot like Rin's when I woke up? It was still longer, but it was really choppy. She must have spoken to Lola, Lola wanted my hair cut.

I grew it out for you, you loved long hair. Yours was long, even though you weren't a girl. But you looked really nice. I miss touching it. I miss you.

Kio. . . When are you coming back home to take me away?