-You Got Me Baby, Are You Mine?-

"I guess what I'm trying to say is I need the deep end

Keep imagining meeting, wished away entire lifetimes"

-3rd February 2012-

I zipped my suitcase shut, hopefully for the final time, and stood up straight. So this was it. I was really doing it. My cab was due any minute and I was finally, finally, packed and ready to go. I was so fucking nervous my hands were shaking and I had to sit back down on the side of my neatly made bed. I had booked my flight to Paris as soon as was physically possible, and then waited for the time to come when I was to pack and start my journey to meet Alex. Today my mind had been completely accompanied by Alex, making my attention span extremely short, and let me tell you, I got shouted at more today than I have even in my entire time at Circus Space. My excuse was that it was the weekend, and I was looking forward to the break. Many of my teachers had given me a skeptical look, but had decided not to pry, knowing that my ability to shut them out was legendary. After the day had finished, I had rushed back home, triple checked my packing and called a taxi in preparation for my escape. I mean journey.

I looked out of my bedroom window and heard Jade's laughter as it floated up from downstairs. Jade had been brilliant in calming me down and helping me pack. As soon as I was back in London, I had phoned her up and apologized, telling her everything. She had told me off, as I knew she would, for pushing Alex away, but had also been sympathetic to my struggle and given me a huge hug when we had met the next day. She was now somewhere downstairs talking to Sally who had arrived a little while back. I had told Sally that I was just going to Paris to have a little break and she had insisted on paying for my taxi to Heathrow. I loved Sally a lot, she had been extremely supportive in my decisions, however she had the tendency to gossip, and right now I didn't want my life talked about with her multiple old lady friends.

My bedroom door opened and I looked up.

"You ready? Your cab just arrived." Jade said as she sat down next to me. Her frizzy blonde hair was pulled up into a high ponytail, small springs of hair arrowed out from her temples. She looked brilliant.

I nodded slowly and then jumped up, flicking my hair off my shoulder, "Yep. Help me take my stuff down will you?"

She shook her head at me, "Yes, of course, just, take a breath Rhea."

I raised my hands above my head and breathed in, letting the breath out as my arms came down. As soon as my hands were back down by my sides, I grabbed my black suitcase and bag, putting it over my shoulder.

I looked over behind me, back to where Jade was still sitting on my bed, "Come on lazy bum, grab that bag will you."

I turned back around and opened the door with my leather clad foot, stumbling through and out onto the landing. I made my way down the landing and then the stairs, into the hallway where Sally was waiting for me.

Sally was a tiny women who just about came up to my shoulder, she had a cloud of white and gray hair which she kept wazy, pulling it back with a couple pins. Her bright pink lips stretched into a smile, revealing strong white teeth, "Are you all packed Darling?"

I smiled gently back at her, hearing Jade coming down the stairs behind me, "Yes, although knowing me, I've probably forgotten something."

She nodded in agreement, her old face crinkling up in laughter. Sally turned and opened the door for me, revealing the waiting taxi. I walked out and the cab driver pulled open the boot for me, where I dumped my suitcase. I turned back out of the way as Jade placed my other small bag next to the it.

She opened her arms and I walked into them, wrapping my arms around her small waist. I nestled my face into her neck and breathed in her scent, feeling more relaxed than I had in days. It was all going to be ok. Just breathe Rhea.

"I love you Rhea, I'll miss you."

"Love you too Jade, like, so much."

I felt her laugh and then she pulled back, I moved away to give Sally a hug as well and then opened my door.

Sally and Jade stood together, arms round each others waists. They held their hands up and each gave me a little wave.

"See you guys." I got into the can and settled down on my seat, I was never very good at goodbyes.

"Ready?" The driver asked in a deep and gravelly voice.

"Yeah, thanks."

We set off, and I rested my head against the back of my seat. The time had finally come to put my issues aside and embrace something new. Someone new, in to my life. We had decided that I would stay for the weekend and catch a flight back early Sunday afternoon. They had shows every night that I was there, but I didn't mind at all. I loved concerts a lot, so much so, that I was sure that I had probably spent half of my lifes earning on concert tickets. Plus, since I would be watching the Arctic Monkeys, aka, one of my favorite bands, I would be pretty much in heaven.

The journey was only about half an hour but seemed to take an age. I swear the world slows down when you're in a hurry just to try and teach you patience. I wasn't really in a hurry to get to Alex, in fact I was kind of freaking out about seeing him, I was more worried about missing my flight. I was already going to miss part of their show at L'Olympia, and this annoyed me, so the thought of missing it all pissed me off. I had to be there to see him play. I had to reacquaint myself with him before I actually met him again. I was worried about how we would react towards each other when we say one another. Would we not be able to think of anything to say, would we have an awkward conversation...would we kiss? I suppose the only way to find out was to wait and see, yet my mind flickered through every scenario humanly possible.

I looked down at my legs which were clad in black wooly tights, it was still winter after all. Playing with the hem of my small blue and white striped dress, I bit my lip. It had took me a long time to decide what to take to wear. I wasn't really sure what was going to happen, ie would we go out, or just lounge around...would he be seeing me naked? To be on the safe side I had packed a bit of everything, so my suitcase was bulging. My excuse was that you had to have the right clothes for the right occasion, it was just a little thing of mine that had to be indulged.

After about 20 minutes the taxi stopped, and I gazed out at the huge building which now loomed above me. Every time I arrived at Heathrow Airport it took my breath away. There was something so modern and majestic about the glass and metal structure that made your heart do a little jump of pride at the human race. We sure could build some extraordinary places. And destroy them.

The cabbie got out of his seat and went to open the boot for me, as I opened my door and stepped out into the wind. It blew my loose hair all over my face, into my eyes and mouth. I grabbed it in one hand and shoved it under the collar of my leather jacket, hoping it would stay there long enough for me to get inside. The cabbie handed me my luggage and I got my purse out of my bag, handing him the agreed price for his services. I thanked him, grabbed the handle of my suitcase, made my way into Heathrow.

_/\_/\/\_

Ticket please Madame."

I handed the stewardess my ticket and looked at the door towards the airplane. Ok, so I traveled. A lot. And yet, I hated planes. A lot. They just did not make sense to me. How the fuck did a huge metal structure fly through the sky when it weighed bloody tonnes? I just didn't trust them, and would try and not fly in them anytime I could. However, with time being short I had put my personal preferences aside and booked the stupidly expensive ticket for a weekend in Paris. I sure hoped I wouldn't regret it.

"That'll be all, please make your way into the plane." Said the small women across the counter, handing me back my ticket.

I thanked her and moved on with my hand luggage, my legs going a little wobbly as I made my way down the tunnel. I swallowed, Rhea, you can do this, as soon as its flying you'll be ok.

Some how I got to my seat with no trouble, only a little trip into the metal container, and shoved my luggage into the space above my head. Just as I was about to sit down, I felt something bang into my leg, I looked down to see a small head of dark brown curls.

"Jake! Please be careful where you're going. There are too many people to run around sweetie."

I looked up to see a young woman sitting in the seat next to me, a baby clutched to her chest. She met my eyes, "I'm so sorry. Jake's used to a bit more space to run around than this."

Jake had now gone back to his mother's side, looking at me with wide dark eyes. I smiled down at him and then at the mother. I held out my hand, "I'm Rhea. Don't worry about it at all, I know exactly how he feels."

Her face cracked into a lovely smile which completely lit up her young face. She shook my hand, "I'm Maria. Thank you so much. You wouldn't believe how many people have shouted at him today. I swear people have no patience with small children these days.

I settled back in my seat, turning my head so that I could still see Maria, "I know right. It gets on my nerves how much they are expected to behave like adults."

I looked down at Jake who was clutching onto his mother's sleeve, inspecting me, "And how old are you?"

He looked up at his mum, who gave him an approving nod and then back at me, "Me two." He said, his voice babyish and high pitched. My heart gave a little squeeze as my older sister syndrome kicked in.

"Really? Are you looking forward to flying on this airplane?" I indicated the plane around us.

He shook his head, his smooth forehead puckering up into a frown, "No, me don't like the feeling' in me stomach."

I smiled down at him and nodded, "I know the feeling, I don't like flying at all."

He stared at me and was about to say something when he was interrupted by the speaker somewhere in the plane announcing our departure. Oh god.

Maria lifted Jake into his seat and fastened his seatbelt and then did the same to herself, holding the baby to her chest. I was dying to see it's face, but it was turned the other way. Maria noticed me looking at the baby and smiled, "This here is Alice, she was born a couple months ago."

I clapped my hand across my mouth, I adored babies, "Oh my god. If you need any help over the course of the journey looking after her, or Jake, just let me know."

I could now see the dark bags under Maria's eyes and the way her eyelids drooped slightly, "I am sure I will use your offer somewhere along the journey." She said, smiling gently.

And she did. Not long after we took flight, Jake came and sat on my lap while I read him story and Maria napped. It turned out they were heading back to see Maria's french husband, Phillip, who lived in Paris, as they were returning from seeing Maria's family. I told her as little as I could about my plans, only that I was going away for the weekend for a break. She had accepted this story without question, and I was glad. She carried on to tell me more about her husband. Apparently he traveled all round the world for his job, she confessed that many times she had considered leaving him as she hated him leaving, but she had stayed. Why you might ask? Because at the end of the day, he was her everything and she his. After Maria had told me this, my mind ran from one thought to another, thinking about being left again and again by Alex. Would I be able to take it? I wondered on this until Jake demanded another story be read to him. For the rest of the flight I sat with Jake and entertained him until he eventually fell asleep on me after about half an hour. I plugged my headphones into my phone and flicked through my albums, one of my arms holding Jake to my chest. What to listen to? There was only one thing for it. It was time to get up to date, again, on the Arctic Monkeys music. I pressed on Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not and leant back against my headrest, the first chords of The View From the Afternoon gracing my ears with it's melodie.

_/\_/\/\_

I was awakened by a squirming on my lap, and then a sudden painful feeling in my ear as my earphones was yanked from my ear hole. It seemed that Suck It and See's calm songs had made me fall asleep. I looked down to see that Jake had woken up as well and had my earphone wire in his small hand as he frowned up at me.

I blinked, "Hey…" I said quietly, my voice soft as you never knew what mood a toddler was in after they had woken up.

"I want food." He said, pointing towards Maria, who was still fast asleep, the baby also still out for the count.

Before I could answer there was a squeak as the speakers came to life, proclaiming that we would in fact be landing in Paris in a minute. "Please fasten your seat belts"

The noise of the speaker and the sudden movement around her, woke Maria. As soon as she had rubbed her eyes, she looked around wildly until she spotted Jake on my lap. Jake saw that she had woken and slid off my lap, toddled over to her, where she picked him up and plopped im in his seat. After she had fastened him in she turned back to me, "Has he been alright?"

I stretched my arms above my head and yawned, "Yeah, he's been a little angel, tell you the truth though, we've both been asleep most of the time."

Maria smiled and ruffled Jakes hair, "Yeah, the travel has definitely taken its toll on us all."

I nodded in agreement and then wrapped my arms around my stomach in a vain attempt of holding my innards together as we made our descent. I started to quietly chant the true names of every muscle in my body, trying to take my mind off the fact that we were hurtling towards earth in a metal object.

When we finally landed, with a rather big bump, and a loud grind, I breathed a sigh of relief and released myself from my own death drip. I heard Maria also breathe a sigh of relief next to me and gave her a smile that plainly said, "I hear you sister."

The plane came to a halt and the entire carriage of people burst into movement, the clicking of seat belts being unfastened echoed round the room. I undid mine and stood up, pulling on my jacket that I had taken off earlier, then reached up and dragged my my bags out from above me. They came down with a thump, nearly landing on my head, but I lurched to the side just in time. Just as I turned around I became aware of a small presence near my legs. I looked down to see the now familiar mop of brown hair at my thighs.

"Bye Rhea." Jake said, his voice quavering slightly as his mouth moved around the unfamiliar name.

I bent down and wrapped my arms around him, feeling my heart flutter as he did the same, "Bye bye sweetie, you take care yeah?"

"Yeah." He broke free and ran back to his mother side.

I leant back as two old ladie bustled past, and then walked forwards to give Maria a farewell hug, "Bye, it was lovely meeting you and your adorable children."

"You too." She said as she gave me a one armed hug as she was holding Alice with the other.

After a few more parting words were said, I gave them one last wave and made my way out of the plane and into Paris Charles de Gaulle Airport, aka, Roissy Airport. I submerged deep into myself as I walked in the bustling crowd passengers. I only became fully aware again when I was standing just outside of the exit to the airport, the warm wind whirling around me, whispering in my ear. I walked to a line of taxi's and tapped on the window of one, the burly french man inside looked up from his newspaper and went to open his door. I quickly stepped back out of his way as the big man vacated his vehicle. Now there was quite few things Alex didn't know about me, some important, some not. One of them was that I spoke fluent French. In circus, one of the biggest countries that has the biggest and best school's is France, so basically if you want to get into any of the big schools or companies, it helps a lot to know french. Plus, they will literally refuse to teach in any other language except French, so go figure. To say the least I was extremely happy that I knew it now.

The cabbie opened the boot of his taxi and motioned for me to put my bag and suitcase in, which I did so, keeping my shoulder bag with me. I thanked him and got into the back while he walked to the drivers side and sat down.

"L'Olympia, 28 Boulevard des Capucines, 75009 Paris, s'il vous plait Monsieur."

He nodded, "D'accord.", and turned back to the wind screen, turning the engine on. It came on with a slight rumble which filled the car and blocked out the sound of the wind that danced round the car.

I leant back and looked out of the window at the darkening sky, the clouds were huge and fluffy, reminding me of sitting on the duvet with Alex. Seriously, the smallest things made me think of him, it was kind of ridiculous, and yet there was certainly worst thing you could think about. I looked at the time, Alex had said that they were on at seven pm. It would take around forty minutes for the taxi to get to L'Olympia, and by then they would have been on stage for a good amount of time. Oh well, at the end of the day, I would be seeing him soon, but then again, not soon enough. My body ached to be held by his, my hands twitched in preparation to hold his, my lips tingled in the hope of touching his. Jesus, I was already turning into a lovesick fool, then again, what did I expect? This was Alex we were talking about here, you would be a fool not to see his almost perfection. I had been a fool, and I still regretted it, I only hoped I could make him believe how sorry I was for the horrible things I said. We had texted and phoned each other a bit, but we were both so insanely busy and the time difference had been a right bugger, we had barely had much connection over the last week or two. I missed him so much it would surprise me out of my daily routine, making me stop and just realise it was all real all over again. That man take my breath away, and right at the bottom of my heart I hoped I had the same affect on him, because if I didn't, this was going to fuck up so bad.

The lights of Paris flew by blurring in the rain that had now began to pour from the heavens. People walked and ran along the streets, together or alone, bathed in the light of the city. Ever since I had been here when I was younger just for those few hours, Paris had stuck in my head like a glowing light of suggestion. There was something hidden in the lights and the people, the small back alleys and the artistic spirit, that called to me as though it was my home. I could never really explain it to anybody, nobody understood what I meant, so I had kept it to myself, and now, here I was, in a country that seemed as much my home as home, going to meet him. They say that perfection does not exist, but in my books this was as close as it got.

We stopped at a traffic light, and I gazed out at a couple on the pavement, arms around each other. They were young, but on the verge of middle life, the way they stood portrayed such comfort and familiarity that it made my chest hurt. Would Alex and I be like that, or would the flower die before it had seen a second Summer? I reminded myself that the only way to find out was to wait and see, but still my hands shook and I looked away as the taxi moved forwards again. Raindrops slid down the window, leaving silvery memories of them in their wake.

Alex had came into my crazy world like a cool and calm river, washing away my hurts and losses, and yet pulling up old injuries that I had hid just under the river bed. How I loved and hated him for showing me things I thought I had lost. To be honest though, I think I had done the same to him.

The taxi came to a halt outside a brightly lit building.

"Nous sommes ici Madame."

We are here indeed. As I looked out of the murky window, I could see 'Arctic Monkeys' and 'Miles Kane' lit brightly by red lights on a huge billboard over the doorway to what I presumed was L'Olympia. There was quite a few people milling about outside, and even what seemed to be a few police standing guard. I wondered if this was just the usual thing or if maybe they were here as an extra precaution against AM fans.

I jumped out of the cab, adrenalin suddenly coursing through my veins. The driver was already out, rounding his shoulders slightly against the now gentle rain that fell from above us. He held my suitcase while I fished in my bag for my purse and got out the appropriate amount of Euro's. We traded the suitcase and money, then said farewell to each other. After the cab had drove away, I just stood there for a while and stared up at the lights, the rain falling softly around me. The building that loomed above me was tall and elegant, like an old fashioned countess, its walls were made out of white stone which was carved beautifully. I moved my suddenly stiff limbs towards the entrance and through the doors into the lobby. The plush red carpet gave way under my feet as I made my way to the desk that was at the far end of the long room. The lobby was all rich reds and dark wood, couches were dotted around the place and posters were stuck up every now and again on the cream walls.

When I arrived at the desk, I brushed my damp hair over my shoulder and smiled at the middle aged woman who sat behind the dark wooden counter. "Hello, I've come here to meet Alex Turner. He's playing here with his band here, the Arctic Monkeys..." I said hesitantly, I was still getting into the habit speaking in French.

She stood up and went to shake my hand, "Ah yes, I have been warned of your arrival."

Relief coursed through me. Alex had said he would alert the staff here of my arrival and have a backstage pass ready for me, but still I worried. I widened my eyes slightly, "Oh no. That doesn't sound too good." I said jokingly.

She laughed and ducked down, reappearing with what looked like a pass for me, "No no, he seemed very excited about seeing you." She gave me a knowing look as she walked round to my side.

I blushed and looked down at my leather clad feet, "Well I hope so."

"Believe me, I know a young man in love when I see one."

I looked back up at her and took the pass which she handed me, "In love? Maybe"

Looking down at the small card, I saw that it was red and had my name, 'Rhea Lovelock VIP' written across the front. Fancy.

I shoved it in the pocket of the small jean shorts I was wearing under my dress. The dress was kinda short and I didn't really want to give anybody an eyeful if I bent over, hence the shorts.

The women watched me with a twinkle in a her light brown eyes and then gestured towards my luggage, "Would you like me to take care of that until you will be needing it?"

I nodded enthusiastically, "Yes please, that would be great, thank you"

I helped her put them just behind the desk, taking out my phone from my bag and putting it in my pocket as I did so. She said that I could pick them up when I left. I thanked her again and then she asked my to follow her.

I did so, walking to some stairs across the almost deserted lobby, "Now I'm not going to show you backstage as it's all very dark around there and you will probably get in the way. Anyway, you'll get a better view from the balcony."

I decided not to inform her that I was used to be being behind stage, and followed her up two flights of stairs. When we finally came to a landing, I could just about hear the bass of music and the scream of the crowd.

Margaret, she had told me her name on the way up, had stopped just outside of some thick looking double doors, "Before we go in I was told to tell you that at the either side of the balcony there are doors that lead directly backstage, so just go down those when the show has ended."

I nodded, and she pushed open one of the doors releasing the smell and noise of a good concert. I walked in behind her, to be blinded by flashing lights and almost deafened by the ending notes of what sounded like Brianstorm. I looked around to see waving arms and bobbing heads. The overwhelming smell of body odours swan around me in the thick air, but I didn't mind. All I cared about was his voice, it broke through the shouts and screams of the crowd like a knife and I stumbled on something on the floor as Margaret and I pushed our way to the front of the balcony.

"Thank you Paris! 'ow's everybodeh doin' upstairs, thats what I really wanna know?" Alex said, sounding slightly out of breath. I could just about see him now as he gazed up towards the balcony giving the people around me a wave. They went crazy and I was jostled into Margaret just as we got to the front of the crowd. She tapped me on the shoulder and indicated that she was going to leave, I nodded and mouthed thank you again. As soon as she turned to go I swung my head round to look at Alex, and gasped. Jesus, he looked so fucking good. He was still waving up at people around me, his quiff was messy and sweat made his face shine in the lights. He was wearing a black shirt with two red roses on each shoulder, and to be honest I don't think I had seen anything more sexy in my entire life. I leant over the side of the balcony, my hair falling in my face. Reaching up, I pulled it out of the way, squashing it into a bun with the hair bobble on my wrist. This movement caught his eye, and he seemed to squint up at me. His eyes widened and I grinned, then put my finger to my puckered lips, giving him a wink. He smirked and I felt my insides squirm as he held my gaze and then turned away to look at the crowd at his feet.

"And 'ows everybodeh downstairs?" He said, his voice going deep and growly as he stretched out the last word. The crowd below me went wild in answer to his question.

"Alright then, lets play The View From the Afternoon ladies and gentlemen…" He trailed off as he readied his hands on the guitar that hung on his body. He strummed the electric guitar, the lights flashing and he started to head bang to the music. I went a little week at the knees as I watched him play. I swear when he got off the stage I was going to, well I wasn't actually sure, but it was going to be something big.

Throughout the song I could feel his eyes on me and after a while I wasn't just feeling hot from the body heat around me. When The View From the Afternoon had finished Alex took a swig of his drink and then jumped up onto the podium that Matt resided on like a king looking over his domain. The crowd below me moved like disturbed water as Alex bent down and said something into Matt's ear. Matt's face cracked into a smile and he glanced up to where I was standing, his eye skimmed over me, and I remembered that he actually had no idea what I looked like. They exchanged a few more words and then as if by unspoken consent, Alex jumped off the podium and the sounds of I Bet You Look Good On the Dancefloor filled the place.

The show carried on without a hitch as they played classic after classic monkey tunes, Brick by Brick, This House is a Circus (that made me laugh) and Still Take You Home. I completely got into it and danced and sang with the rest of the people that swarmed around me, and all the time his eyes were on me and mine were on him. My heart gave a little squeeze when Miles came out onto stage after Still Take You Home and they played one of my personal favorites, Little Illusion Machine (Wirral Riddler). The way they performed on stage together was just extraordinary. The little glances and touches made me really see for the first time the strong relationship between the two of them, they were truly like brothers and it warmed my heart.

Miles left the stage just before the song ended, while Alex did a bit of solo guitar that made me lick my lips in delight. They then played Pretty Visitors which I sang along to, line by line, and lapped up the almost rapping Alex. I loved Pretty Visitors just for the fact that it was so different to any of their other stuff. The way Alex sang it was just brilliant, considering a normal person struggled getting their mouth around the tongue twisting lyrics. After they had finished, Alex dedicated the next song to all the girls, which made all the women and girls in the room scream,and I was not ashamed to say that I screamed too. Although I did have an excuse as, as Alex talked, he looked straight up to where I was standing. Our eyes met across the room and the whole place seemed to disappear, I was completely submerged in his hot gaze. He broke the eye contact to play the first chords of Suck It and See. I was pretty sure that years later I would still tell the story of this moment.

I was happily staring dreamily at Alex as he sang away about kisses that could crease the rain and shangri la girls, and then he started to sing the chorus for the third time.

"Suck it and see you, you never know, sit next to me before I go, jigsaw women with horror movie shoes..."

He looked up and met my gaze again, "...Be cruel to me cause I'm a fool for you, Rhea.."

It took a moment for it to sink in and then I froze my gentle swaying and stared at him, but by he had turned away, back to the crowd. I brought my hand to my mouth, tears forming in the corners of my eyes. Do not cry Rhea, do not cry. I took a big breath and gulped, holding back the tears. You are here to enjoy yourself, not get all soppy because he sang your name, I told myself. How could I ever have doubted him? If that wasn't a pretty big declaration of affection, then I didn't know what love was anymore. The shock didn't wear off until halfway through the next song, Do Me a Favour, and by then I was in a kind of dreamy state, my eyes never leaving Alex.

I was shocked when Richard Hawley came on and I saw the the likeness between him and Alex. It made me giggle the way they both had a quiff, although you could say Richard's was a little outdated, considering he now had a receding hairline, although his still sang with all the vigour of his youth.

Watching Alex on stage was so different to anything I had ever experienced. There is certainly a difference between hungering after an artist at a concert and then just going home, to knowing that after they have come off stage you will be able to see them, to touch them, to talk to them. To be honest, now I think back on the days spent in Alex's company, I wasn't sure how it happened, I suppose I let down my guard. I swore I would never fall for someone like this again, and yet I had fallen hard. I guess I should have seen it coming, but it caught me by surprise, I wasn't looking where I was going and I fell into his dark eyes.

The last song they played was, predictably, 505, accompanied by Miles, and I'm not ashamed to say that I did in fact cry. There is just something about that song that catches you unawares, and makes you re-think a lot of things. It made my chest ache and tears fall from my eyes as I watched my man on stage, singing his heart out. When an artist writes lyrics you forget just how personal they can be, as they come straight from the heart. You are lulled into the illusion that they don't mean much by crap bands and songs that have been written by 10 people. With 505, I suppose I felt like I saw straight into Alex's heart and life, the lyrics are so raw and simple you would have to be made out of stone for the words not to prick your heart.

The last tones of the song trickled away into the air and they waved goodbye. The crowd screamed, but I didn't hear them, as Alex vacated the stage. This was it, it was time to see him. An urgency I didn't know I possessed took over me and I pushed my way along the balcony, past sweaty bodies and loud voices that washed over me. I almost fell over feet and chairs, and god knows what else, but nothing could really stop me as I half ran, half stumbled to the doors leading down to the stage. I finally got there, panting, sweat making the fine hairs stick to my damp skin, my mouth dry. I now saw that to access the stage you had to swipe a card. I momentarily panicked and then remembered my VIP card thingy. Yanking it out of my pocket, I swiped it and a small light on the device turned green, allowing me entrance. I pushed the thick door open and was blinded by a brightly lit stairway that was completely white except for the black stairs that lead down, down to him. My boots squeaked on the slippery surface of the stairs, as I flew down them, my eyes wide, trying not to fall. When I got to the bottom, there was one small black door, I stopped just outside it, took a deep breath and then pushed it open. Complete darkness. My eyes slowly adjusted, and I could now see people walking about in the small corridor backstage, carrying guitars, amps and various other things. I walked in slowly and squinted up the hallway at the figures trying to see if I recognised any. Where was he? I was just about to despair when a soft light was turned on, gently lighting up the space.

And then I saw him. And he saw me. We just looked at each other for a minute. He held a small white towel in his left hand and a bottle of water in the other. Without breaking eye contact he slowly put them on the floor and stood back up, his entire expression was complicated, his face a book in a language I didn't yet understand. I could take it no longer and I ran. I ran towards him and into his open arms, jumping and wrapping my legs around his waist, feeling his strong arms wind around me, holding me to him. I met his eyes, and then leant forwards and our lips met. He tasted of tequila and cigarette smoke, and smelled of sweat and spice. My whole body vibrated with energy and I was barely aware of him pressing me up against a wall and slowly letting me slide down to my feet. My hands found his face and hair, stroking and caressing, familiarizing themselves with the feel of him. He was all around me. His hands were felt hot through my one layer of clothing, and I longed to feel them on my skin. His lips on mine were gently pushing mine open and our tongues met. I opened my mouth more and moaned quietly, Jesus fucking christ, this is how wanted to be forever, with him. We finally broke apart, gasping, and Alex's mouth moved to my neck, sending tingles all down my body. I was vaguely aware of eyes on us, but paid no heed. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered except him. I inhaled sharply as his lips found the spot behind my ear, and my knees gave way slightly.

Without thinking really thinking about it, I spoke the words that had been in my head for days, "Alex, you got me baby, are you mine?"

He stilled, and then moved his mouth right next to my ear, I closed my eyes, "Always."

He moved his head, and I opened my eyes again to meet his.

In this world we are surrounded by all of these lies and people who talk too much. He now had got the kind of look in his eyes, as if no one knew anything but us. I suppose at the end of the day we are only dreamers, and I'm only dreaming of him. Alex, you are, and always will be, my dream.

"Your love is like a studded leather headlock

Your kiss it could put creases in the rain"

So there you go! I dont know about you, but I know that all I'm thinking, is about fucking time! I really hope this lived up to your expectations of the first kiss, teehee, and I haven't let you down.

Also, I said in the last chapter about being patient and I just wanted to say I wasn't saying it because people were being impatient, it was more just warning to you guys that it may take longer for me to write the chapters.

Thank you again for the brilliant and just incredibly inspiring reviews! Sav x